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Thots TV

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We dive DEEP into British children's telly! From puppet cacti to deadly gameshows, we're taking a nostalgic trip to an era in which Barney Harwood was King. Everything you forgot that you loved throughout the 90s and 2000s? Well for some reason, we remember it all. And we're going to talk about it. (A podcast for adults seeking Highbrow Cultural Commentary - not for kids!) Get bonus content on Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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HelloOOO! You've waited a long time for us to cover the topic of the nation's comedy sweethearts, double act royalty, kings of the catchphrase etc. and FINALLY the day has come for us to talk about the Chuckle Brothers! Not only are we discussing the LONG-running CBBC sitcom, but also the various 1980s curiosities the Brothers provided us with over…
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A little while ago, Metro produced an article with the headline ‘I created Tots TV, Teletubbies and Rosie and Jim – I fear they’re being twisted’. This is our response to a very insightful interview with Anne Wood by Josie Copson. We also mused on the subject of nostalgia and differences between various eras of children's TV. Though this is a bonus…
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"Look - I've found something!" They walk like the Slitheen, look like psychedelic hippos, and live on a planet from 60s Star Trek; they're the FIMBLES! In this episode, we discuss the Fimbles, its more successful spin-off series, and even a short-lived radio show featuring the series' most annying character. Digressions include reasons Meg got in t…
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The Fat Controller laughed, "You are wrong." Choo choo motherfuckers, it's Thomas and Friends. Some of you absolutely adore this show and probably already know everything we're about to tell you. Some of you are rightly terrified of these death-masks on wheels and the existential questions they present. Us? Both. Join us as we dive deep into the au…
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WE MADE IT! Nineteen and a half hours each of viewing; one BBC iplayer breakdown; two late-night Redbulls; and lots of eyeliner later, and we have FINALLY come to the end of the Young Dracula Saga. Join us once more to bask in the glory of the Count's hair, Ingrid's face, and Vlad's inability to fulfill his role as child dictator of the vampire wor…
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WE MADE IT! Nineteen and a half hours each of viewing; one BBC iplayer breakdown; two late-night Redbulls; and lots of eyeliner later, and we have FINALLY come to the end of the Young Dracula Saga. Join us once more to bask in the glory of the Count's hair, Ingrid's face, and Vlad's inability to fulfill his role as child dictator of the vampire wor…
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"I am COUNT Dracula, not SPELL Dracula!" We've binged it so you don't have to - but you SHOULD. As you can see, we have a LOT to say about this show. So much that we had to split the "Welsh Years" into part A and part B. Consume all this content as you will. It's even on YouTube if you fancy taking a gander at our vampire costumes... Instagram: htt…
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"I am COUNT Dracula, not SPELL Dracula!" We've binged it so you don't have to - but you SHOULD. As you can see, we have a LOT to say about this show. So much that we had to split the "Welsh Years" into part A and part B. Consume all this content as you will. It's even on YouTube if you fancy taking a gander at our vampire costumes... Instagram: htt…
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BOGIES!!! After two and a half fairly serious episodes, it's time for a reset. Dick and Dom in da Bungalow is one of our most requested episodes ever, and here it is. After one of the most fun """research periods""" ever undertaken in the history of the pod, we're ready to talk everything from the cultural fallout over the decline of the Saturday M…
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We're revisiting our favourite idiots - the SIX idiots! In this exclusive peek behind our subscriber paywall, we chat food, men, Ghosts, and sing a little bit. And that's about it. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/th0tstv/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/thots__tv Email: thotstv2002@gmail.com Discord: https://discord.gg/JPHxcxk48V Get bonus conten…
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"We are very fond of you! We love you very much!" How do we even begin to introduce this one? It's Bagpuss, it's perfect, some of us cried. In this episode, we are celebrating the 50th anniversary of Bagpuss with a hysterical outpouring of love and the occasional insightful thought. Meg also soft-launches her boyfriend who just so happened to inter…
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Two down, three to go! After the emotional turmoil of series one, we thought it was only right to put ourselves through it all over again. All in the name of responsible programming! We have sadly lost Maxy, Peter, Zac, Ryan, and Mike. BUT fan-favourites (Lol and Bouncer); our favourite (Nathan); and someone's favourite (Amber) have arrived. We lov…
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We're one year old. Let's take a trip down memory lane and revisit some of our (well, our editor's) favourite moments over the past two series. OR SO WE THOUGHT! We ALSO have a special bonus clip that didn't make the cut. Because it's about piss, shit, and vomit. Thank you for sticking with us, and here's to another year! Support the show Get bonus…
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The Thots are back baybeeeee! This week we're tackling the cultural JUGGERNAUT that is Peppa Pig. We're covering everything from gender politics and communism to accents and health and safety concerns. We're also welcoming back much-missed the Common Sense Media section! Love her or hate her, this little piggy controls the entire market and there's…
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Merry Christmas dear dear listeners! We were supposed to be taking a break for the holidays but we just couldn't stay away! As a Christmas treat to ourselves, we've broken the theme of the podcast for just one week to bring you our favourite family film - Nanny McPhee. A staple holiday-season-tv-schedule-filler; a vehicle for Emma Thompson's brilli…
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Check-in time with the Thots! We're taking a (tiny) break over the Christmas period, but we have a VERY special surprise lined up for you in the meantime. Stay tuned for a holiday special dropping in late December, and keep on chatting to us on the socials - we love hearing from you! We're genuinely touched by all of the support you've given us ove…
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"I'm a Thot, je suis une Thot. Laura, Meg, and Elsie." We've kept you in suspense for long enough... we're FINALLY covering the most obvious subject for us to cover. Another long-awaited development: we recorded this episode in a REAL LIFE STUDIO. If you want to know what our faces look like, this episode is also available on YouTube at www.youtube…
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Cautionary tales for lovers of squeem... In this SECOND (we love Halloween) spooky special, we're talking about the TV show with the HIGHEST NUMBER OF CHILD DEATHS PER AVERAGE EPISODE. Probably. We didn't check. Digressions include; the inherent terror of mirrors; our individual preparations for any potential home invasion; the scribblings of Edwar…
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wooooOOOO! In this spoooooky episode, we're exploring not one, not two, but THREE shows from the distant(ish) past. Just like the Amicus Productions movies and (more importantly) the Simpsons Treehouse of Horror specials before us, we are taking three short stories and shoving them into one seasonal episode. Meg and Laura make their "telling the ot…
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Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today on this hallowed ground (listening platform of your choice), to celebrate the life of the UK's second favourite children's television channel. The Thots are here to eulogise the channel which has recently died a slow, painful, tragic death. From the daring, new Watch It! era of the 1980s, to the dizzying h…
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"Clifford!" ~ Emily Elizabeth. Join us for our VERY FIRST cartoon episode! (How has it taken nine months?) We're here to talk about the logistical and political nightmare that is owing a dog bigger than your own house. XL Bullies have NOTHING on this absolute unit. Other topics covered include the epic highs and devastating lows of the Scholastic B…
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BOG OFF ELAINE! We're FINALLY broaching the huge, scary, sacred topic of Tracy Beaker - starting off with the emotionally devastating first series. We admire bold fashion choices of Justine Littlewood; we rediscover the endless charm of our Spiritual Queen Dani Harmer; Mike Milligan heals our inner child; and we all suffer from acute and sudden ons…
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What's the story in Balamory? Wouldn't YOU like to know?! Hello? What's your name? Oh of COURSE! Today we're jumping on a ferry to Scotland's answer to Hebden Bridge. It's Balamory! Get set for a MUSIC HEAVY episode complete with strong regional accents and good vibes. Hesitations/deviations/repetitions include; the decline of hotel bibles; UK yogu…
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Due to technical difficulties (appointing Elsie as editor), our Balamory episode has been delayed. In lieu of """content""", please enjoy this selection of inane babble that didn't make the cut and has been hanging around in our hard drive for months. Regular programming will resume next week. Thank you from us, The Thots, for sticking around and s…
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Do not react... YOU are the saboteur! This week we're coming to you from a CGI tower with gaping holes in the floor in place of stairs. If the audio quality isn't up to scratch, you know why. Along the way, we discuss; the illustrious career of Nation's Sweetheart Simon Greenall; the illustrious career of Other Nation's Sweetheart Faith Brown; a lo…
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WE'RE BACK!!! Our Summer break is over and we're kicking off a new series of Thots TV with something from the deep dark depths of the ITV archives. Rainbow is the perfect mix of Sesame Street and a Carry On movie about a sex dungeon that hasn't yet been written. This is the best description I can come up with. "Oooh Geoffrey!" Hesitations, deviatio…
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This is an art attack! And THIS is an art attack!!! Today we're talking about a 1990s British classic! Millennials, Gen Z, and even those of us in the weird betweeny taint area can ALL be united by one fond memory - Neil Buchanan making big pictures out of items of clothing in a sports hall. Other content includes the New Wave of British Heavy Meta…
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The oven is HOT HOT HOT! Big Cook Little Cook is the story of a fraught relationship between two ex-lovers trying to keep their gimmick-based cafe open and viable as a business. In this episode, we accidentally hit you with a wine-related twist five minutes in. It's a boozy review of the nations favourite man/homunculus duo! Also discussed: the mos…
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Sadie J, Sassy J, the Sasster, Sadielicious, Sasstastic, Sassamondo, etc. Sadie J is a sitcom about the "only girl in a boy's world". Apparently. This week we review a show that's visually, audibly, and spiritually ugly enough to make us swear more than usual, and not quite popular enough for a Common Sense Media page. OH HOW WE'VE MISSED THIS! Dig…
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"We metaphalaxiated our lower wagmas for Lucy. That must mean we love her!" This week, our good good friend Jasmine is here to discuss the classic 90s/2000s sitcom My Parents Are Aliens! We find that the costumes worn in the show have aged mostly well, but not QUITE as well as the show's gender politics... We have generally stayed on topic this wee…
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Surprise bonus content! Between our last Horrible Histories ep and our upcoming My Parents Are Aliens ep, we've decided to grace your ears with some clever clever Laura insight. Our gorgeous flatmate has taken time out of her busy PhD schedule to chat about "the half-life of knowledge". What's the half-life of knowledge? Laura's here to enlighten u…
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"Gory stories, we do that. And your host? A talking rat!" It is the single most obvious show to cover and we fancied an easy week. It's Horrible Histories!!! Not one single critique can be found in this here episode. Just pure simple unadulterated love for the gang of six actors/writers/comedians that brought us some of the most memorable TV moment…
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The 21st century faces a new kind of threat!!! Old school spies have had their day, and... well, you know the rest. In this episode, we display a HUGE show of love for the original M.I. High cast, and also discuss the the other ones. Join us for an uncharacteristically thoughtful discussion of a silly show about child-spies, campy villains, and cel…
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Stylin'! Rockin'!! Slammin'!!! Love it!!!! This week we're joined by very special guest Arthur Loades - no.1 fan of 2000s doll sensation, the BRATZ! Hated by parents and loved by... we don't really know who loved by... Sasha, Jade, Cloe, and Yasmine are the girls with a passion for fashion (and a truly dreadful tv show from which we simply can't lo…
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The show that's not quite Robot Wars! Bamzooki was the BBC's 2004 attempt at breaking into the """diGiTaL sPaCE""" A long and complicated production history, a cameo from Hewlett Packard, and a ridiculously large budget resting on the computing skills of nine-year-olds. Hilarity ensues! In this re-watch, we laugh cruelly at the comedy acting skills…
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"Let the challenge....................... BEGIN!" Grim Reaper men disappearing children in the Scottish Highlands? A man in leather trousers allowing it to happen? Forest-based homoeroticism? It can only be RAVEN! We had so much to say on this long-awaited topic - it's a miracle that we got it down to a very respectable 75 minutes. Please enjoy lis…
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"Hello Auntie Mabel. Would you like a brick?" Come Outside was about a woman who could build walls of brick and fly a spotty plane. If you are five years old, living in a pre-Google age, and need to know how water is filtered, how pencils are made, or how a sewage plant works, this is the show for you. There's also a cute dog. This week, we explore…
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"It just came out! I couldn't help it, Max!" This week we're talking about a playgroup of four giant fleecy monsters. It's the Tweenies! Twists and turns include our ranking of the nuts; the phenomenon of Scrappy Doo; whether or not it is normal to fancy a cartoon; and a lovely phone call with Elsie's mum and dad. FAB-A-ROONEY! Support the show Get…
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"Have you ever heard the sound of a rubber ball breaking a window? WOULD YOU LIKE TO?!" The LazyTown episode is upon us. Cucumber? I hardly know her. We only eat Sports Candy here at Thots TV. This is the story of how one Icelandic builder combined competitive aerobics, motivational speaking, and Eurotrash to create the most successful kids' show o…
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NOOT NOOT! It's our first (real) episode and we're kicking off with our second favourite claymation penguin. Twists and turns include; the gradual dissolution of the USSR; old-fashioned tomato throwing as a form of media review; and Top of the Pops 1989. If at times it sounds like we're in an underwater cave, it's because we are. Support the show G…
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