#121 - Quick Tips #16: When Grandma Pushes Your Limits


Manage episode 284606765 series 2102331
By Vicki Tidwell Palmer, LCSW, Vicki Tidwell Palmer, and LCSW. Discovered by Player FM and our community — copyright is owned by the publisher, not Player FM, and audio is streamed directly from their servers. Hit the Subscribe button to track updates in Player FM, or paste the feed URL into other podcast apps.

Sooner or later, every single one of us will feel manipulated by someone. That’s why this episode is for you, even if you don’t specifically have a grandmother who’s pushing your limits. Today I’ll cover some strategies to help you find solutions in these situations. One point that I can’t emphasize enough is how important it is to focus on what you want, instead of what you don’t like. Tune in to learn more, so you’ll be prepared next time you’re feeling manipulated.

Biggest Takeaways From Episode #121:

  • When you’re focusing on something you don’t want, it’s vital to know what you do want instead. Many of us struggle with developing this skill, but it’s definitely worth practicing. Just thinking about the solution can actually help you feel better!
  • It’s helpful to start by viewing what you’re thinking (or making up) as a possibility, rather than the absolute Truth.
  • No one has the power to make you do anything. You are in control of what you do, say, and think. When you approach interactions with this knowledge and a plan for how to respond, you’ll be better prepared in any situation.

Highlights from Episode #121:

  • Vicki welcomes listeners to today’s episode, and mentions her upcoming live monthly Boundaries Clarifier Workshops starting Tuesday, February 23, 2021. [00:39]
  • We hear the listener question that inspired this episode. [03:32]
  • Does Vicki think that the listener is being controlling? [04:50]
  • Vicki digs further into the scenario around the question that inspired today’s episode, which relates to the listening boundary. [08:23]
  • Vicki shares a specific example of how her advice can apply in this situation. She also points out the difference between a statement and an invitation. [11:40]
  • We learn about one of the potential solutions to this situation, and why it can be a trap. [14:39]
  • Why not just make a request that the grandmother to go through the listener to spend time with her daughter? Vicki explains why this may not be the best option. [18:21]

Links and Resources:

139 episodes