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ATARI BYTES

William Pepper

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Remember those classic Atari 2600 games? They were sure fun to play, but didn't you ever wonder why they sent a plumber to take out Donkey Kong? What Yar was seeking revenge against? What made those robots go berserk? Me too? ATARI BYTES is more than a game review podcast. It's an exploration of the games to divine what exactly the story within the game is. And if we can't find those answers, we'll make 'em up.
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Happy holidays! ATARI BYTES returns from hiatus with episode 331, the annual holiday special. We take a break from games and story writing to catch up on some movies. And we've made it all the way to 1985! So that movie-catching is coming along great! Earlier this year, we played the Sesame Street inspired game "Cookie Monster Munch", so it seemed …
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We're getting down to the last few days of tax time in America as this episode goes out. Why not relieve some of that mathematical stress with a podcast! In 330, we're playing the 1982 game TAX AVOIDERS, the intense adventure of tax sheltered investments. Then once you've listened to this episode...go back and listen to some of the other 329 - for …
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Peanut butter and jelly. Laverne and Shirley. And now Atari and Muppets. All great things that belong together. In episode 329, we're playing COOKIE MONSTER MUNCH for the 2600. This 1983 joint effort by Atari and The Children's Computer Workshop is a showcase for Cookie Monster. (I was more of a Grover man, myself. But Cookie is pretty cool.) But i…
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In 328, we build on the massive tower of gaming experiences we've had on this show with MASTER BUILDER from Spectravision, 1983. Does it stand tall and proud or all come tumbling down? Listen and find out! ORIGINAL SHORT STORY: Building Up Expectations Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Reformat", "Hidd…
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327 features the 1983 prototype KICKMAN from CBS Electronics, based on the arcade game, which also wasn't that popular. Why didn't it work out? One guess.... No, not that. It's balloons! This game is full of 'em. And even in 1983, they knew to stay away from balloons. Why didn't we listen? Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative comm…
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By 1988, the 2600 was feeling a bit long in the tooth. But once in a while, it could still enthrall the gamer of the day. So, does DARK CHAMBERS from Sculptured Software enthrall or enrage? Throw open the chamber door on this episode and see what happens. Bad Poetry Corner: HEART BEAT ON DARK CHAMBER DOORS Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com …
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In 1982, Canadian-based department store chain Zellers thought it would be fun to take a break from selling washers and socks and whatever and instead program Atari games. Why? Dunno. But I played one. It's called Donkey Kong. No, wait. Sorry! It's called INCA GOLD. You'll understand why I was confused after episode 325. Original Short Story: GOLD …
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Is Answer Software's 1983 title GAUNTLET the answer to all our gaming needs? Hold your water and listen to episode 324. Raise a glass to not spilling a glass. No, really. Look, just listen to the episode. Thanks! Original Short Story: UNDAUNTED GAUNTLET Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Take a Chance",…
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Episode 323 is a bargain. I mean, not like cheap socks or 2-for-1 toasters like you could get at Zellers in Canada in the 1980s. (I'm just guessing about that.) But in this episode, we're playing TIME WARP, one of two games Zellers developed in 1983 all on its own for the 2600, maybe in aisle 3 between the winter coats and MC Hammer parachute pants…
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No Christmas content really this episode, but it's dropping on Christmas Day, so...MERRY CHRISTMAS! Hope you and yours have a lovely day and joyous holiday season! Here at the podcast, we're relaxing with a movie as is our tradition for the last episode of the year. This time, it's the 1963 classic JASON AND THE ARGONAUTS. Ancient Greek Gods! Skele…
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Ok, look. It's the holiday season. And while we all try to be good, if you're like me, you stumble a bit. We probably all deserve a bit of coal in our holiday stockings. Just think of episode 321 as your penance before the Big Guy brings your presents. This episode, we're talking about the 1982 Hanna-Barbera animated special "Christmas Comes to Pac…
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While you gulp down the last of the pumpkin pie, give episode 320 a listen. We're clowning around with one of Audacity Games' 2021 debuts CIRCUS CONVOY. Does the game barrel down the highway of fun? Or does it stall out in a ditch somewhere? BAD POETRY CORNER: OVER THE BIG TOP Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of hi…
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As a kid in the arcade, I found Sega's 1983 title CONGO BONGO...interesting. So, of course, when I got hold of a copy of the game for the 5200, I had to try it. And now in episode 319, I have. That's a thing I've done. What did I think? Well, you'll have to listen and find out. SHORT STORY: THE BONGO BASTARDS https://incompetech.com/Thanks to Kevin…
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On this Halloween Eve...eve, we've got an awesome treat. No, not candy. No, not money. No, not world peace in our time. Look, it's another podcast episode, ok? Episode 318 is MIDNIGHT MUTANTS for the 7800. Is it a tasty confection or a bitter pill? And why is Grampa Munster here?!?! Bad Poetry Corner: MIDNIGHT MUTANTS - A POEM Into the Vertical Bla…
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In 1982, did Data Age got a LOCK on the submarine adventure genre? Or does this game suck the AIR out of gaming fun? We're playing AIRLOCK. Well, mostly we're cursing AIRLOCK. There's a nice story though... SHORT STORY: AIRLOCKED AND LOADED - A STEVE STETSON, 1980's SUPERSPY ADVENTURE Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons u…
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With the game NO ESCAPE!, episode 316 is escapist fun you can't escape from! Well, you could just not listen, I suppose. But you wouldn't do that, would you? Would you?!?!? We're playing this 1983 title from iMagic. Goddesses! Guys named Jason! Getting stoned! It's all here! Original Short Story from Me: Yourself and Nowhere to Go From There - A Pl…
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Beep! Beep! Move it...to episode 315 of ATARI BYTES! We're playing CommaVid's unreleased 1983 title RUSH HOUR. Honk if you love games! Bad Poetry Corner: GET OUT OF MY WAY! Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Reformat", "Take a Chance" and "Pinball Spring". Thanks to Sean Courtney for the "Storytime" the…
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This episode croaks on arrival. In 314, we're "playing" (Sort of) CommaVid's unreleased demo for something maybe called FROG that the programmer dug out of an old box after twenty years and chucked out to the masses without a care...much like this podcast is produced. Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "…
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Does episode of 313 get a strong hold on your heart as we play Commavid's 1983 space game STRONGHOLD? Listen and decide for yourself! Original Short Story: THE INEVITABILITY OF HISTORY Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Take a Chance", "Reformat" and "Pinball Spring". Thanks to Sean Courtney for the "St…
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In episode 312, we've got tunnel vision, focused only on bringing you a doozy of an episode! This time, it's the 1983 CBS Electronics game TUNNEL RUNNER, a ground-breaking, immersive 4D experience. Okay, actually, they call it it 3D. We added the fourth D for "DAMN!" Original Short Story: TUNNEL VISION Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for …
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Call the Orkin man! (Gratuitous Orkin Man shout out. Send me a check.) In episode 311, I'm sorry to tell you, you've got termites. And not just any termites. Giant, space-faring, killer nest-building termites. It's COSMIC SWARM, the 1982 title from CommaVid. Termites all over the darn place. And you, friend, must destroy them. Fight that creepy cra…
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Episode 310 is going to the dogs...er, rabbits. We're playing Apollo's 1982 title WABBIT for the 2600. The bunnies are on a fluffy rampage! So grab your carrots...er, joysticks and join us! This episode's original short story: THE CABAL Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Take a Chance", "Reformat" and "…
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In ATARI BYTES 309, I hear voices. This is nothing new, but this time, I know the voices are coming from outside my own head. Probably. We're closing out Intellivision Month on the podcast by playing the 1982 Mattel title "Space Spartans" with - holy crap! - the "Intellivoice" voice synthesizer module. Is the game fun? Who cares! There's a robotic …
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Episode 308 of ATARI BYTES is a blast! A GAS blast, specifically! It's true! In SPACE HAWK, your gas is the only thing that can save the universe. Tell you significant other to stop complaining. The 1982 Mattel title SPACE HAWK is for the Intellivision console. Why an Intellivision game on an Atari-based podcast? Well, it's our annual INTELLIVISION…
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Does the 1983 nuclear terrorism game COUNTERMEASURE for the 5200 measure up to the quality you've come to expect from this podcast? Counter point: Don't sweat it. The podcast is free. Short Story: MEASURE TWICE, CUT ONCE...TO THE BONE Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Take a Chance", "Reformat" and "Pi…
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Let ye who is without Sin-istar, cast the first pod. Well, fortunately for us, we DO have this episode's game SINISTAR, the 1984 Atari 2600 port prototype of the arcade game. Is the game a heavenly delight or sinfully awful? Count your luck stars and join us. Bad Poetry Corner: THE SINN SISTERS HOST A BRUNCH Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.co…
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The 5200 love-fest continues in 305 with QIX. This 1982 puzzling, strategizing, flashy lights game is a keeper...of addictive frustrations. SHORT STORY: QIX-SAND Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Take a Chance", "Reformat" and "Pinball Spring". Thanks to Sean Courtney for the Storytime theme. Head to w…
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In episode 304, you're joining the podcast at an historic moment...the debut of our brand-new (refurbished) ATARI 5200 CONSOLE (Thanks, Jose!) We launch into the stratospheric heights of new game possiblities by falling into the dungeon, the SPACE DUNGEON, to be specific. The 1983 Taito arcade port is my focus in this one...until my cameraman wrest…
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Throw this ATARI BYTES episode on the junk heap. Episode 303 is going to the SCRAPYARD DOG (For the 7800, Atari, 1990). Is this game doggone fun or just one for the dogs? SHORT STORY - BAD POETRY CORNER: DOGGED Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Take a Chance", "Reformat" and "Pinball Spring". Thanks to…
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WE'RE BACK, BABIES! After a scary week while my computer was in the computer hospital getting a hard drive transplant and other upgrades, we're back! And that's not the only reason we're flying high! In 302, we're playing SUPER HUEY for the 7800. Was it worth the wait for this episode? Now boarding to find out... Short Story: SUPER, HUEY Thanks to …
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Do you remember the 1970's cartoon "Gilligan's Planet", where the castaways travel from the island to outer space? No? Well, you should. It was...something. The 7800 game BALLBLAZER, which we played in episode 301, is a little like that. It's like transporting a soccer game from the stadium to space. "Ted Lasso" in an astronaut helmet maybe. So, is…
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ATARI BYTES is 300 episodes old! If it were years, we'd be older than America! ATARI BYTES deserves some respect as the country's elder. I'm going to stop paying taxes. We're taking a break from the video games and story-fying to play a good, old-fashioned video game. This time, it's Buffalo Games' 2021 SPACE INVADERS: THE BOARD GAME. But is this b…
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So, I think I've only had to re-record ATARI BYTES 299, featuring ASSAULT from 1983, once due to technical glitches. But I've seen enough science fiction to know I could be caught in some sort of time loop. This could be my 8,000th recording. Is the game worth eternity in this one moment? Well, it was made by a company called Bomb. Hmmm. Short Stor…
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The Moon God gets a bad rap. Sure, in QUEST FOR QUINTANA ROO, the 1984 game from Sunrise Software, the Moon God wants to kill you. But, I mean, in the game you are plundering the Moon God's ancient temple. On the upside, all this unpleasantness did bring about episode 298 of ATARI BYTES! Bad Poetry Corner: The Quest Chooses Us Thanks to Kevin McLeo…
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Any old show could give you mutants, but how many can offer you COMMUNIST mutants? 2021 had Covid spinoffs, insurrections and climate upheavals. 2022 has communist mutants. Seems about right. In episode 297, we played the 1982 weirdly named Starpath game COMMUNIST MUTANTS FROM SPACE. Because with a title like that, how could we not? Short Story: A …
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It's the last episode of 2021! And in honor of our laziness tradition, for the last episode we put away the games and rest our story-thinking brains, and kick back with a movie. This time, we're watching the 1983....cult?...classic KRULL, which inspired the Atari game eagle-eared listeners will remember we talked about in episode 295 Was KRULL a kr…
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ATARI BYTES episode 295 is all about KRULL, Atari's adaptation of the 1983 sci-fi movie...classic?...of the same name. The game, like the movie, has you, the hero, trying to defeat The Beast, with a star-shaped "glaive", save the princess and defend the galaxy. So, is this game a five-pointed romp, or a pointless exercise, times five? We'll find ou…
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Commavid knew what it was doing. I mean, they went out of business, but they knew a good basis for a game. Cake! People really only like two things: kittens and cake. I know, people SAY they like other things, but this is actually about it. Unfortunately, "Kitten Walk" doesn't roll of the tongue as easy as "Cakewalk", so Commavid went with that for…
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Birds of a feather listen to podcasts together. Or alone. Whatever. You do you. In episode 293, from 1982, we're playing one of the few Ultravision titles, CONDOR ATTACK. Does the game soar above the rest, or was I a dodo for playing? Here's hoping you don't get dive bombed while listening... Short Story: ATTACKED Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompet…
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Whoaaaaa! You're reading this show note (possibly) on Halloween, about an episode released on Halloween, featuring a game called "Halloween", inspired by the movie "Halloween". Spooky! Which is appropriate because in episode 292, we're playing the Wizard Video 1983 title "Halloween". If you enjoy sprite decapitations and 8-bit child murder in a Ski…
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I LOVE TRASH! ANYTHING FUNNY AND GAMEY AND PODCASTY! OH, I LOVE TRASH...PODCASTS! In episode 291, can you tell me how to get to podcast street? We're playing the 1983 educational title SESAME STREET: OSCAR'S TRASH RACE. Oh, yes. We are. Bad Poetry Corner: GROUCH POTATO - A POEM Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of h…
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Pass the Pepto!* I mean joystick! *This episode sponsored by Pepto-Bismol** **We wish. In episode 290, we're playing the Parker Brothers 1984 title MONTEZUMA'S REVENGE, where you race through gloomy caverns, dodging skulls, snakes, spiders, treacherous drops and lava. All to make your way to the toilet. Sorry! Make your way to the treasure room. Ma…
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In ATARI BYTES episode 289, the unicorns are chasing the centaurs across the grassy knolls that dot Mt. Olympus; winged gods soar above, inspiring the mortals...and probably impregnating them occasionally. Not really. We're playing MINES OF MINOS, from CommaVid, 1982. It's all maze, no minotaurs. You can put away your ball of thread. Or not. Someth…
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Play a space game requiring super technical, minor adjustments to thrust vectors and yaw? More like YAWN, amirite? In 288, we're playing Activision's (squee!) 1983 space shuttle simulator SPACE SHUTTLE: A JOURNEY INTO SPACE. Instead of, we suppose, a journey into the local supermarket. The game is a technical marvel. But is it fun? Is it really eve…
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Belgian listeners! Episode 287 is for you! On this episode of ATARI BYTES, we're playing the 1982 Coleco game SMURFS: RESCUE IN GARGAMEL'S CASTLE. The game features those super annoying beloved blue cartoon characters the SMURFS! And we're terribly sorry about that. Can you ever smurf us? Hey! watch the smurfin' language! There are smurfettes prese…
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Our Olympic fever shows no sign of breaking. The mercury has shot out the top of the thermometer, splattering all over this week's episode. In 286 of ATARI BYTES, we're playing VIDEO OLYMPICS, one of Atari's 1977 "original nine" games. There's very little actual Olympic content. But that's okay because I have very little actual Olympic skill. This …
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In ATARI BYTES episode 285, we're playing the David Crane (squee!) 1983 Activision (squee!) title DECATHLON in honor of the increasingly misnamed 2020 Olympics! With ten events, is this game ten times the fun? We've got our tank top and tight shorts and are ready to find out. Bad Poetry Corner: DEAD CAT LON Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com…
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Episode 284 of ATARI BYTES gets its groove ON with the 1982 Sega port of ZAXXON! (That's a terrible set up. But the episode is good. I promise. Probably. Maybe. Look, just listen, please. ) This week's short story: ZACH'S ON Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incompetech.com for creative commons use of his songs "Take a Chance", "Reformat" and "Pinball Spri…
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Intellivision Month 2021 concludes this month in ATARI BYTES episode 283. We're playing TRON DEADLY DISCS, inspired by the "cult classic" movie. It's a collision of cult classic movie and cult classic podcast! (I might be delusional.) This week's short story: DEADLY DISCS - A STEVE STETSON, 1980s SUPERSPY, ADVENTURE Thanks to Kevin McLeod at Incomp…
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INTELLIVISION MONTH 2021 barrels forward on ATARI BYTES 282. Much as we do with the twisty maze that is life, we're winding our way through the twisty maze of Mattel's 1982 Intellivision offering NIGHT STALKER, a/k/a the 2600 game "Dark Cavern". (spoiler!) But...are you stalking the bats/spiders/robots. Or...are they stalking YOU? More importantly,…
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