Kandace Rather public
[search 0]
More
Download the App!
show episodes
 
Artwork

1
Processing Trauma Out Loud

Kandace Rather & Sher Nyquist

Unsubscribe
Unsubscribe
Weekly
 
Conversations about trauma and healing from two women who are doing the work. The scars of childhood trauma don’t fade away. The roots go deep. This trauma can wrap tentacles around every aspect of life, pushing and pulling us according to its will. These stories of harm have been hard wired into our brain. Yet, we don’t see the connection of childhood trauma and current day pain because it has been with us as far back as we can recall. We don’t realize this trauma is the source of our strug ...
  continue reading
 
Loading …
show series
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss the theme of childhood emotional neglect. Though childhood emotional neglect can be harder to identify, it’s often the culprit of the struggle we have to express our emotions and get clarity on what we need. Listen in as Kandace engages Sher’s recent struggle to connect what she needed, and how attunemen…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher tackle the theme of Parentification. Children who experience complex childhood trauma often are placed in family roles that they were never meant to be in. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss examples from their own stories. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming …
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Sher interviews Kandace about her recent invitation to speak on healing hurt in the workplace. Listen in as Kandace shares her passion for bringing people the care and nurture they need to heal trauma and live out their calling. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service. Your f…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue the conversation about triangulation and how we heal when we discovered we were triangulated as a child. Triangulation occurs more often than we might be aware, but as we learn there’s a better way, we can choose a different path. Listen in as Kandace and Sher wrap up this 2-part series on triangulation…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher talk about the theme of triangulation within our stories of childhood trauma. Triangulation is particularly painful for a child as no child wants to be in the middle of adult relationships. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss what triangulation is and the effects it has on children. If you have a chance, pleas…
  continue reading
 
Today’s episode comes with a caution as Kandace and Sher discuss the topic of complicity in childhood sexual abuse. Though we know sexual abuse is never the child’s fault, why do many children grow up feeling they played a role in being abused? Listen in as Kandace and Sher talk about why this is true and how we heal from the lies when the real tru…
  continue reading
 
Today’s episode comes with a caution as Kandace and Sher discuss the topic of complicity in childhood sexual abuse. Though we know sexual abuse is never the child’s fault, why do many children grow up feeling they played a role in being abused? Listen in as Kandace and Sher talk about why this is true and how we heal from the lies when the real tru…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue a discussion on the goodness they’ve witnessed from those they’ve worked with as clients. Many times our current day challenges are connected to old, young stories that are asking for care. Listen in as Kandace and Sher highlight how Story Work helps us show up differently in our relationships and caree…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss the ways they’ve seen Story Work bring healing into the lives of their clients. Until our stories of harm are brought into the light with those who can be with us in our anger and grief, we remain stuck in various ways. Listen in as Kandace and Sher continue this series on why they love Story Work. If yo…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why they love Story Work as a healing modality when getting help from the effects of childhood trauma. When we’ve been harmed as young children, there are shifts that occur that influence our beliefs about who we are and how the world is. Listen in to part two of this new series on why Kandace and Sher l…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why they love Story Work as a healing modality when getting help from the effects of childhood trauma. When we’ve been harmed as young children, there are shifts that occur that influence our beliefs about who we are and how the world is. Sher names these shifts that come in the form of curses and vows. …
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher wrap up a two-part series on what it means to have a victim-mindset. Once we find a safe place to share our stories of being victimized, we can move towards the healing we need and leave the victim mindset behind. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss with compassion over why it can be hard to name the victim mi…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher tackle the topic of what it means to have a victim-mindset. If you were once a victim, and have never received care, it makes sense you would have a victim-mindset. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss this important topic with awareness and deep compassion for those who have been victimized. If you have a chan…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue the discussion on dreams and desires. When we feel blocked in pursuing our dreams and desires, we can slow down and be curious about the stories that are asking for more healing. Listen in as Kandace and Sher wrap up this two-part series of the goodness of tapping into our dreams and desires. Link to Sh…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher start off the New Year talking about dreams and desires for 2024. If you find it hard to know what you desire and struggle to dream, there’s a reason. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss some of their hopes and desires for the coming year. Link to Sher's course on Art and Healing: https://www.processingtraumao…
  continue reading
 
In todays episode, Kandace and Sher continue the topic of arousal structures. Understanding our particular arousal structures and how they are connected to our childhood trauma, can help us move out of painful patterns and into new ways of showing up in our relationships. Listen in as Kandace and Sher take on this difficult, but important topic. Li…
  continue reading
 
In todays episode, Kandace and Sher discuss the topic of arousal structures. Understanding our particular arousal structures and how they are connected to our childhood trauma, can help us move out of painful patterns and into new ways of showing up in our relationships. Listen in as Kandace and Sher take on this difficult, but important topic. Lin…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher process several reasons why we can find it so difficult to ask for help. Whether it’s feelings of shame, feeling like we’re a burden, or feeling like no one cares, we can slowly move towards asking for help knowing healing is available. Listen in as Kandace and Sher express their invitation to reach out and ask …
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why it’s so important to find our courage to ask for help. Though asking for help is a simple request, it’s more complicated when asking for help in the past did not end well. Listen in as Kandace and Sher bring this important topic to the table. Link to Sher's course on Art and Healing: https://www.proc…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher have a conversation around what it means to honor our losses and the importance of grieving to heal. Though grief can be sometimes take our breathe away, every tear we cry on the journey matters. Link to Sher's course on Art and Healing: https://www.processingtraumaoutloud.com/arthealingcourse?fbclid=IwAR16Sh1-z…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher look back on this last year and name a few things they are grateful for. One of the greatest gifts of staying on the healing journey is experiencing the joy of having safe and secure attachments. Listen in and consider what it might mean for you to begin your healing journey today! Link to Sher's course on Art a…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher interview Dawn Kuhlman, trauma-informed mediator and director of March Mediation in Liberty, Missouri. Dawn’s desire to bring compassionate understanding in helping her clients navigate conflict comes from her own healing journey of having complex trauma. Listen in as the conversation takes us to a beautiful con…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher wrap up a 4-part series processing why having self-compassion is a key to healing from the affects of childhood trauma. When we begin to tell our stories of shame and are met with deep compassion and love, we begin to heal. Listen in as Kandace and Sher invite you to begin the healing journey. Link to Sher's cou…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue discussing the importance of having self-compassion in order to heal from developmental trauma. Listen in as they talk about what self-compassion is and how it develops. Link to Sher's course on Art and Healing: https://www.processingtraumaoutloud.com/arthealingcourse?fbclid=IwAR16Sh1-zqJj2fmsF2tpx2z4JP…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why it can be difficult to develop self-compassion if you’ve grown up believing that you are the problem. Until we see our stories more truly, from a posture of self-compassion, we can remain stuck in harsh, negative emotions towards ourselves. Listen in as Sher asks Kandace questions about her experienc…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher start a new topic in their cultivation series about what it means to be self-compassionate. In early childhood, self-compassion either develops or it doesn't. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss their journeys of moving away from self-contempt and into a posture of self-compassion that seeks to heal. Link to S…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher talk through Sher’s journey of healing through using watercolors and creating her recent online course Art and Healing. Listen in as Kandace interviews Sher about how painting with watercolors has become a bottom-up approach to her own healing and now can be a resource for you as well! If you have a chance, plea…
  continue reading
 
In todays episode, Kandace and Sher discuss specifics on how to develop greater self-awareness. Though we will never be perfectly self-aware, we can become more self-aware and experience greater satisfaction in our relationship to others and to ourselves. Listen in as Kandace and Sher highlight the ways they’ve increased in their own self-awareness…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue their cultivation series discussing the topic of self-awareness. Developing self-awareness can help us heal from the effects of childhood trauma. Listen in as Sher engages with Kandace about her recent experience leading a story work weekend and how having self-awareness deepened her joy of serving othe…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher conclude the topic of cultivating the trait of being a good listener. Though we will never be perfect listeners, we can become listeners! Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss what it means that we all have to work through forming judgements and assumptions as a listener. If you have a chance, please rate and re…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss how it feels to be deeply listened to. What does it mean when someone leans in and genuinely desires to hear more? Listen in as Kandace and Sher name three things they’ve experienced in the presence of a good listener. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming …
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue their discussion on cultivating the trait of being a deep listener. When we’ve experienced complex childhood trauma, we know something of what it means to feel dismissed in conversation or consumed in conversation. Listen in as Kandace and Sher talk through the experience difference and invite you to be…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher begin a new series looking at how we cultivate specific traits we want to grow in as we heal from the affects of complex childhood trauma. Deep listening is a gift we are given and a gift we can offer in order to experience feeling seen and heard. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss how deep listening is a tra…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss what it means to have an inner-critic. Critical thoughts that seem to control us can be confronted and cared for. Listen in as Kandace and Sher give three things we can do when critical thoughts arise. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service. Your fee…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher process how healing often involves mystery. If we’ve had childhood trauma, we will think we need certainty to feel safe. But what if we can heal without knowing the outcome by focusing on just taking the next step? Listen in as Kandace and Sher explore what it means to sit and ponder with curiosity and intention…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode Sher discusses what it means to reclaim our creativity when we’ve experienced complex childhood trauma. Listen in as Sher tells of her personal experience of reclaiming her creativity and the invitation to join her in an upcoming class she is offering. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred st…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher reveal their own attachment wound coming from experiencing complex childhood trauma. For those who have experienced complex childhood trauma, the wound of losing safe and secure connections happened in multiple ways. Coming to terms with how this affected us is extremely hard, but worth it in order to heal today…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace & Sher discuss another topic in their series on things that are hard to do on the healing journey, but worth doing. Identifying and discovering hidden beliefs and perceptions can feel very hard to do when it requires time, intentionality, and allowing someone else to ask us questions. Listen in as Kandace and Sher give a…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss what it means to believe we are worthy of love coming from a history of complex childhood trauma. Though it can be extremely hard to see what we needed as a child, but did not receive, it’s worth doing the work of healing so we can believe we are loved today. Listen in as Kandace and Sher open up a conve…
  continue reading
 
In todays episode, Sher talks about the importance of having someone to tell our hardest stories to. Those stories we feel we can never tell anyone, but long to be free from the shame of them. Listen in as Sher speaks from her heart about her own journey of speaking the unspeakable. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your …
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher wrap up their 4-part series of how we heal from the painful experiences of self-betrayal. In this final step, they discuss why slowing down is essential when we are breaking free from patterns that bring us pain and feelings of deep shame. Listen in as Kandace and Sher offer the hope of healing from years of sel…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss the importance of listening to our bodies as a means of discovering what we need. Understanding what dysregulation is and does is a form of self-care that can positively change our lives. Listen in as Kandace and Sher give examples of how they have used this understanding to help heal from self-betrayal.…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher further the conversation on what it means to heal from self-betrayal. The first step is naming the truth of our correct situation with just one person. Listen in as Kandace and Sher talk about why this is often a very difficult step to take, but once taken with a safe person, can be life-changing. If you have a …
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss what it means to betray ourselves because of the complex childhood trauma we experienced. Self-betrayal is a painful adaptive behavior we learn as children. Listen in as they share the hope of moving out of self-betrayal and into healing, starting with these three steps. If you have a chance, please rate…
  continue reading
 
What To Do Instead of Spiritual Bypassing In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue the conversation on spiritual bypassing and offer ways we can avoid using it. Listen in as Kandace and Sher address why spiritual bypassing is something we’ve probably all done, but can now learn a better way. If you have a chance, please rate and review this po…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss what spiritual bypassing is and how it has influenced their healing journey. Spiritual bypassing is one way we avoid feeling painful emotions that are often messy and feel shameful. Listen in as Kandace and Sher begin this important conversation. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast …
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why they keep showing up each week to record Processing Trauma Out Loud and the lessons they have learned over the last year. Listen in as Kandace and Sher express their heart’s desire to keep providing a space for those who are on the journey of doing the beautiful work of healing. If you have a chance,…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher conclude their series on what it means to have an abandonment wound and how we heal. The hope of healing this wound from experiencing complex childhood trauma is more than possible. Kandace and Sher both understand the pain of this wound and offer hope through how they are healing. If you have a chance, please r…
  continue reading
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher further their discussion on what it means to have an abandonment wound. Listen in as they share stories and describe this painful wound in more detail. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service. Your feedback is extremely valuable and contributes to the success…
  continue reading
 
Loading …

Quick Reference Guide