We say Merry Farking Xmas (crossing out the christ bit) talk prick relatives, political correctness, Jamie offends Ree Bee's sensibilities and we take a brief foray into gushing and tourettes. That just about covers it ... Bah Humbug!

They said we'd never make it but we finally came through ... for all of those who made it ... this ones made for you!!!!! We turn 21 and celebrate by calling Trump a kunt, finding out how to clean a yonniegg, lament the inevitable reality of grey pubic hair (they're extra curly) and ask the question who's giving thanks?…

We celebrate turning 20 by getting drunk and talking about Yonnieggs, bleached bot bots and the feckin Irish (Tinker scum).

We talk Mums masturbating, Scottish people, internet cliches, people who choose shit professions, Pinot Noir and those dirty dirty syrups of Christs College in Christchurch ... you know who you are.

Arseholes are the theme for this weeks instalment of your favourite, guilty pleasure podcast. We talk our own arseholes, as well as arseholes who drive Jeeps, wear Hawaiian shirts and run America.

We wonder aloud if Princess Megan is a right dirty bird, contemplate corporate wankers and corporate speak and Ree-Bee tries to deny her working class roots. "Peel the farking potatoes serf girl!". Climate change deniers and god botherers also get a passing mention ... which is all they farken deserve.…

We talk mushroom shaped penises, a couple of dark and sad things cos we're getting old and depressive. We touch on Kanye West and discuss the possibility of him being FUCKING NUTS!!!!!!!!! and we complain to the rain gods. Also inappropriate wank bank withdrawals and we try our hand at giving advice.…

We talk Judge Kavanagh (dick), Jacinda Ardern (so not a dick), Keto (thin dicks) and Crazy Rich Asians (Ree Bee has no taste in movies). Oh and Jamie and Ree look at porn together in a darkened room underneath Jamie's house - whats wrong with that? Also mentioned: cinema etiquette, blow jobs, fat shaming and daddy issues. Keep your expectations ...…

When you get angry, take a breath and count to 10. Throw a punch at 8. Nobody expects that! -Anon. Jame and veganism doesn't mix well. His report card also said "Jame doesn't work well with others". The ever shrinking Jame speaks about keto, while Ree interrupts him and talks food issues that - hazard a guess, all women understand. Arrogance an ...…

"Nervous as a long-tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs." - Nick "The Honey Badger" Cummins The Bachelor in Australia with the good ole Honey Badger gets a look in and MY GOD Louis C.K - BE BETTER. In fact, humanity in general, be better. FFS.