Episode 9: Carlos Leal

Bullyproof Radio

Summary

• Carlos wasn’t really aware of being bullied but was a bully himself. Being a strong kid in elementary school, Carlos was jealous of a kid, and made sure no one played with him. He realized his mistakes when he started learning bully-proofing from Gracie family. Bullying has many dimensions; it can be secluding, just verbally abusing, psychological abusing.

• Not giving bullying enough significance is also a problem, bullying can’t just be eliminated but the lives of individuals can be improved. A bully is just another kid that has something wrong done to him, maybe in school at homes by someone bigger. Bullying in case for boys is straight forward, pushing, punching, name calling, taking stuff away, but in case of girls is making comments, eliminating her from groups, teasing etc. Girls and boys are different, they are wired differently, and they never have similar childhoods, and same with bullying aspect. Cyber-bullying is a very interesting subject as all of it can be avoided just by logging out, and most kids don’t and won’t do that.

• Kids are reluctant to fight even if the bully keeps bullying them. They don’t want trouble. Gracie bully proof system is super smart, as it involves subduing and controlling situation, causing minimal damage. A school should not only prepare kids for academics, they should give lessons for life. We can find bullies everywhere in workplace, schools, government. If we prepare a kid for life he will not only be bully proof, but also a responsible citizen. Child should have all the necessary conditions for life education; he shouldn’t live in fear of anything. A system like this will require time, and can be achieved by communities working together only. A bully can be anybody.

• The first step to bully proofing is to see if you can walk away from the situation, if the bullying continues then talk to him and if it doesn’t stop, confront him. Sharing your problems with teachers or elders shouldn’t be ignored. Self-defense is the very last resort. Just saying kids are woos and telling them to defend doesn’t work. You can’t tell a small kid just to defend himself, and that just causes bigger problems. That’s irresponsible and ignorant behavior and problem comes back again. Educating kids is a solution but teaching a kid MMA is not, a child should know basic defense, to defend himself from situations not become an expert, that makes for a bigger bully.

• So the definition of the word jujitsu is ‘the gentle art’. Gracie family brought jujitsu to America. If you see any fights of Gracie, it’s not violent. They just hold the guy, kick him down and they put him in an arm bar or chokehold but those things can be controlled. You have a ton of control. You have level 1 to level 10 where level 1 is just controlling, and level 10 you can cause harm, for more information and coping bullying Carlos refers to Gracie website (Graciekids.com) and taking martial arts classes are very helpful.