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Crucial Talks Episode 11 Use Identity to Build Relationships: Christmas Presents, Presence, and Snickers Bars
Manage episode 210570862 series 2362271
In this episode, I tell a story of going to buy my wife a Christmas present. It started as a clear in-group/out-group matchup between the sales associate and me. However, I pivoted. I became present in the moment and began to think about the identities that the sales associate played in her life. That allowed me to gain empathy. Because of that empathy, I communicated in a way that brought us into the same group. I also found a way to become an ally and not build trust. I didn't expect a discount, I merely wanted to see if we could develop a short-term relationship based on a shared identity. We did and I was able to transition from a "customer" to an ally. This encounter lasted mere minutes, but shows the power of using identity and the roles we play to understand others and understand the world around us.
131 episodes
Manage episode 210570862 series 2362271
In this episode, I tell a story of going to buy my wife a Christmas present. It started as a clear in-group/out-group matchup between the sales associate and me. However, I pivoted. I became present in the moment and began to think about the identities that the sales associate played in her life. That allowed me to gain empathy. Because of that empathy, I communicated in a way that brought us into the same group. I also found a way to become an ally and not build trust. I didn't expect a discount, I merely wanted to see if we could develop a short-term relationship based on a shared identity. We did and I was able to transition from a "customer" to an ally. This encounter lasted mere minutes, but shows the power of using identity and the roles we play to understand others and understand the world around us.
131 episodes
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