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How Far Should I Go to Give My Emotionally Abusive Husband a Chance to Change?

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Manage episode 346462740 series 2826628
Content provided by Natalie Hoffman. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Natalie Hoffman or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.

I remember thinking that if I could just hit on the right inflection in my voice maybe or the correct tone or the perfect combination of words or the right attitude — you know, one of subservience and humility so as not to trigger his fragile ego and bring down his wrath — I’d finally get through. He’d finally get it. The wall would come crumbling down.

Nope.

When I finally filed for divorce, he suddenly said he’d seen the light. He’s willing to go to counseling. If I don’t give him this “final” chance (there have been so many “final” chances), I’ll feel like I didn’t do enough.

Is this you?

This episode defines “enough”:

  • What a 10-year-old kid and an iPad have to do with an abusive husband and therapy
  • Why there’s not much hope for abusers
  • The reason your body’s “ick” reaction to your husband’s Hail Mary shows it’s wiser than your mental second-guessing
  • How many chances I gave my ex-husband, and how mad it made God when I stopped (Spoiler Alert: It didn’t make God mad)
  • Why feeling conflicted in your emotionally abusive marriage is COMPLETELY NORMAL
  • What DARVO is (and what it has to do with cats and ducks)
  • Why you’re asking the wrong questions

Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here

If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list at https://flyingfreesisterhood.com/free-download

You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher at https://joinflyinghigher.com

  continue reading

272 episodes

Artwork
iconShare
 
Manage episode 346462740 series 2826628
Content provided by Natalie Hoffman. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Natalie Hoffman or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.

I remember thinking that if I could just hit on the right inflection in my voice maybe or the correct tone or the perfect combination of words or the right attitude — you know, one of subservience and humility so as not to trigger his fragile ego and bring down his wrath — I’d finally get through. He’d finally get it. The wall would come crumbling down.

Nope.

When I finally filed for divorce, he suddenly said he’d seen the light. He’s willing to go to counseling. If I don’t give him this “final” chance (there have been so many “final” chances), I’ll feel like I didn’t do enough.

Is this you?

This episode defines “enough”:

  • What a 10-year-old kid and an iPad have to do with an abusive husband and therapy
  • Why there’s not much hope for abusers
  • The reason your body’s “ick” reaction to your husband’s Hail Mary shows it’s wiser than your mental second-guessing
  • How many chances I gave my ex-husband, and how mad it made God when I stopped (Spoiler Alert: It didn’t make God mad)
  • Why feeling conflicted in your emotionally abusive marriage is COMPLETELY NORMAL
  • What DARVO is (and what it has to do with cats and ducks)
  • Why you’re asking the wrong questions

Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here

If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list at https://flyingfreesisterhood.com/free-download

You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher at https://joinflyinghigher.com

  continue reading

272 episodes

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