004: Dealing with Mom Guilt While Running a Business

Frickin' Awesome Entrepreneur

Welcome to the first real-life episode of Frickin’ Awesome Entrepreneur! This is me, Alissa Daire Nelson, IRL. I hope you’re ready for this! #FAE #IRL

About Today’s #IRL Episode

Here I’m talking all things Mom guilt. As a solopreneur, I find it incredibly difficult to keep clear boundaries between my work life and family life. So today I bare all things here to help you see you aren’t alone. And I am joined by my girls, Avery and Annika, for a frank conversation about how my work affects them.

Key Takeaways

• When you’re with your family, you’re thinking about work. And when you’re at work, you’re thinking about family. Turning one off in favor of the other is such a challenge.
• There is no such thing as work-life balance. Instead, strive for work-life harmony. Both are important; give them both the space they deserve.
• Placing value on learning from each experience makes such a difference in family dynamics and relationships.
• The guilt of just not having enough comes up for every entrepreneur. The “should be” and “could be” statements running through your head need to be checked every once in a while.
• As parents, we get into our own heads about what’s going on and laying on the guilt for ourselves. It is so important to get out of your head and to include your children in conversation about how your work life affects them.

Time-Stamped Show Highlights

• 2:38 – Insight into my daily and weekly work schedule
• 4:58 – The struggles I feel when it comes to Mom guilt, and them any failures I’ve faced in trying to shut down work time
• 5:39 – Why I don’t believe in “Work-Life Balance”
• 7:38 – Meet my girls, Avery and Annika!
• 10:39 – The girls’ perspectives on pros of having a Mom as an entrepreneur

I feel like if you have a work-from-home Mom, you get to see them and interact with them more than you would with a Mom who works outside of the office.

• 15:42 – Falling into “coach mode” as Mom, and what to do about it
• 18:02 – My biggest challenge: getting out of the office and letting go of work
• 19:01 – The girls’ biggest cons of having a Mom as an entrepreneur
• 23:09 – Strategies for bringing up concerns between child and parent

Use Brené Brown’s SFD – the first rough draft of what’s going on in your head. Using this removes all the blame and opens conversation.

• 28:40 – Ideas from the girls about setting parameters for working hours and allowing for a bit of grace and harmony
• 33:39 – A summary of strategies we’re going to use to help us through this guilt process. Feel free to steal any or all of these!

Podcast Rec of the Week:

My podcast rec of the week is The Boss Mom Podcast, with host Dana Malstaff. Dana talks about the challenges big and small of raising and nurturing both your business and your babies. And coming this spring, the Boss Dad Podcast! www.boss-mom.com.

Selected Links for This Episode

• Episode 049 of Maximize of Your Strengths
• Brené Brown’s books (SFD first comes up in Rising Strong)

Frickin’ Awesome Resources

• Frickin’ Awesome Entrepreneur Facebook Community
• From Frustrated to Frickin’ Awesome by Alissa Daire Nelson
• Daire Success Coaching website
• StrengthsFinder 2.0 test
• StrengthsFinder 2.0 by Tom Rath