Infidelity, secrets and our need for connection - Esther Perel


Manage episode 246595278 series 2391138
By Matthias Wittfoth, PhD, Matthias Wittfoth, PhD | Neuroscientist | Sports-, and Music-Coach | Author. Discovered by Player FM and our community — copyright is owned by the publisher, not Player FM, and audio is streamed directly from their servers. Hit the Subscribe button to track updates in Player FM, or paste the feed URL into other podcast apps.

Esther Perel is a world-renowned relationship therapist, bestselling author, and a fantastic and inspiring speaker. She has given 20+ million viewed TED talks that had challenged the views of many people regarding sex, relationships, and infidelity.

I could not have thought of anyone who is more suitable (and more keen) for doing the interview with Esther than my wife Dina.

Dina Wittfoth is a neuroscientist working at the Medical School Hannover, Germany ( and has read and listened to all Esther has been published). She is my co-host of the podcast "Science on the Rocks". Dina made an incredible effort to make this interview happen!

The Shownotes are available at

6:25 Evidence-based vs. Eminence-based - Challenging dogmas

7:59 Building community and training with Esther - Her platform ‚Sessions‘

9:26 Let’s not be so sure - the truth of today is often the joke of tomorrow

10:48 Including the body in therapy vs. more ‚cerebral‘ approaches

12:58 ‚The State of Affairs‘ – Esther’s most recent NYT Bestseller

13:59 Post-traumatic growth - What it takes to learn from affairs

19:59 Can you afford honesty? Socioeconomic context and working with secrets in therapy

24:51 Freedom, self-reliance and interdependence in the Millennial generation

30:01 Community as an approach to life

36:58 Including the Body – Therapy is an experience, it’s not just a thought!

38:17 Translations and broadening the conversation – Synthesizers, Excavators and the therapeutic toolbox

41:58 What is essential? - Learning by writing, teaching and translating

69 episodes