Manage episode 195022699 series 29793
The more conventionally attractive somebody is, the more social and cultural value we tend to ascribe to them. And the more social value we give them, the more we define our own value in our ability to “win” them.
This is never more evident than when people - mostly guys, but some women too - rank others people by attractiveness. The idea of “who’s hot, who’s not” and what that means is deeply embedded in our collective consciousness because of that perceived value. And that’s because that value is, in a very real way, transitory. It passes on to you by association.
The theory goes like this: someone who’s incredibly hot has value and power. They can, supposedly, pick and choose their partners with relative abandon because hey, they’re hot. So if you want to date an 8, a 9 or a 10, you have to have equal or greater social value - that is to say, looks.
Of course, there’s only so many hot people of any gender; conventional looks falls on a bell-curve, and the vast majority of people are going to fall in the middle, so to pull a 9 or 10, you have to be something “special”.
But do you really?
This week, we're going to talk about what it really takes to date someone who's "out of your league".
- Why the transitive power of attractiveness makes dating "out of your league" so appealing
- Why physical looks counts for less than you think
- How Doctor Who demonstrates the folly of "leagues"
- How personality ultimately wins over appearance
- What really matters when it comes to attraction
... and so much more.
Level Up: Dating Out of Your League - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/leveling-up-out-of-your-league
Which Matters More: Looks or Personality? - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/building-attraction-which-matters-more-looks-personality/
Do Looks Matter? - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/do-looks-matter/
Learn From This: Don Jon - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/learn-this-don-jon/
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