Getting Hacked, the CrossFit Open, & My Upcoming Event – Episode 78: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast

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This week on the podcast, I’m talking about the CrossFit Open coming to an end, trying yoga for the first time, balancing a new workout routine, my Facebook getting hacked and my upcoming Denver meet-up on April 15th at Just Be Kitchen at 3pm and 6pm. Get tickets for the even today!

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Big thank you to this week’s sponsor!

Siete is a healthy Mexican-American food brand that makes grain free and paleo-friendly tortillas and tortilla chips, and they are a brand I talk about weekly because I love them so much. Siete has three different kinds of grain-free tortilla chips including sea salt, lime and nacho and the chips are made simply with simple ingredients like cassava flour, avocado oil, coconut flour, ground chia seed, sea salt, and citric acid. And their bags are puffed to perfection so even the last chip you have at the bottom of the bag is still a full chip, instead of a crumbled mess like most chips. And their tortillas are just as delicious. They offer almond flour tortillas, cassava & chia tortillas, and my favorite – cassava and coconut tortillas. And right now, Siete would like to offer PaleOMG Uncensored listeners 10% off at sietefoods.com if they use the promo code PALEOMG. Just go to sietefoods.com and use promo code PALEOMG for 10% off right now!

Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!

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Episode 78 Transcription Coming Soon!

This week’s podcast is brought to you by Siete. Siete is a healthy Mexican-American food brand that makes grain free and paleo friendly tortillas and tortilla chips. And they’re a brand I talk about every single week on my blog and on Instagram, because I love them so freaking much.

The Garza family is made up; yup, you guessed it. Seven people. Siete. I don’t know a whole lot of Spanish, but I know Siete from four years of Spanish class in high school, so I’m obviously crushing it. When Veronica, one of the five kids who I actually interviewed on the podcast back on episode 60, when she was diagnosed with multiple autoimmune conditions she began cooking with new ingredients, and the family came together to support her new diet and lifestyle.

The more they loved and enjoyed her creations, the more they knew they needed to share this with the world. And that’s how the Siete brand came to be. Siete has different kinds of grain free tortilla chips, including sea salt, lime, and nacho. And the chips are made from cassava flour, avocado oil, coconut flour, ground chia seeds, sea salt, citric acid, and lime oil. That is it. Well; lime oil for the lime ones.

And the bags are puffed to perfection. So even the last chip at the bottom of the bag is actually a full chip instead of just a crumbled mess. I hate that in chips, and you never get that with Siete. I think about that every time I eat an entire bag.

And their tortillas are just as delicious. They offer almond flour, cassava and chia, and my favorite, the cassava and coconut flour tortillas. Which I use every week. I place mine on the gas stovetop to heat them through about 10 seconds per side, and then they are soft and ready for loading up.

And it’s honestly not surprising how amazing their products are, because everyone on the Siete team is seriously so fantastic. I’ve been to their office. I know the whole team. I love them all. Follow them on Instagram stories, and you’ll quickly see how much fun they have every day at their office. They’re just the best.

And right now, Siete would like to offer PaleOMG Uncensored listeners 10% off at Sietefoods.com if they use the promo code PaleOMG. That means you can take back taco Tuesday and celebrate, all for 10% off. Just go to Sietefoods.com and use the promo code PaleOMG. And don’t forget to follow them on Instagram, because they will simply brighten your day with their Instagram stories, and their beautiful concoctions that their chef and other people create with their tortilla chips and their tortillas. I just love them so much! So go to Sietefoods.com. And don’t forget to use promo code PaleOMG for 10% off your order.

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: Hello. How are you? It’s just little old me today. Just me, myself, and I. Sitting on the couch with the dog. You’ll probably hear him snore at some point. Or bark at nothing. Because he’s really into that lately. I don’t know what’s come over him. I don’t know where this came from. But he loves barking.

Like, this morning. The TV is on. A commercial for dog; I don’t know, animated movie comes on. What does he do? He barks. It’s like; dude. The dogs aren’t even real. Can’t you tell the difference? You dummy.

But. I don’t know where I was going with that. I love him anyways. He can do no wrong. He’s the perfect dog in the entire world.

I hope everybody is having a wonderful week. I am not. {laughing} Let’s just talk about; well, I guess I’ll get into that. I’ll talk about Facebook getting hacked. We can talk all about Facebook. Because it’s just such funny timing that my Facebook got hacked while Facebook is in the news every single day just being a sh*t storm of a company. We’ll get into that later.

Can we all celebrate now; I know not everybody feels this way. Or even does CrossFit, so if you don’t give a f*ck about this. But I’m still going to talk about it. The CrossFit Open being done. Let’s all take a second and celebrate. I’m so over the CrossFit Open. To me, I used to love the CrossFit Open. Because it was the competition that lead up to Regionals, and I was trying to make it to Regionals every year. So I used to love it. It was the time of my life. I lived for it. That’s all I did.

But now, I don’t give a f*ck. And I don’t want to do a workout RX ever. Ever. Unless it’s body weight. Maybe. Maybe I’ll do it RX. (RX means prescribed, if you don’t know stupid CrossFit lingo. Sorry to be that person.)

So anyway. The CrossFit Open was like a 5-week long competition; online competition. People get so f*cking serious about it. People get hurt from it because they let their ego get in the way, and push harder than they ever would. And at our gym, our owner and head coach is really persistent about form, and will say; “No. Take that weight off there.” Or knows when people can push it farther.

So, he doesn’t let people’s form deteriorate during a workout. He will make you fix it. He will make you pull weight off. He will make you do body weight, whatever he needs to do. But during the Open, it’s totally different. Because you’re doing a workout as prescribed. And if that means a 205-pound deadlift; or for males, 315-pound deadlift. Some people will be doing that. And I was included in that 205-pound deadlift that I did not want to f*cking do. And I picked it up 9 times. And I had no business picking it up. So my back was flaring up. I’ve been going to a chiropractor here in town that has been helping with that.

But after the Open finished; I said deuces CrossFit, I’m f*cking annoyed with you. I’m not into you right now. We’re in a fight. And I’m taking the week off of CrossFit. I just needed to take a step back. Because as I get older, and all these 8 years of CrossFit accumulate. Especially competition days, where I was working out two to three times a day. And lifting so much heavier than I do now. My body has taken a turn for the worst. So yeah, I’m not feeling great.

But this week has been awesome. Because I started trying different workouts. So on Tuesday this past week, I went to Core Power. And I did; it’s like a C2 class. I don’t know. But you’re flowing into movements. I don’t know all the; when I say all, I don’t know any yoga terms. The only thing I could understand what she was saying; this woman kept saying yogis. And I was like; stop calling us yogis. It creeps me out. It’s like Yogi Bear. Creepy.

So I did this C2 class. Loved it. So hot. You leave drenched. From head to toe, you are completely soaked in sweat. And I just don’t get that with CrossFit very often, because we’re just doing sprint workouts. We’re not doing a long hour 110-degree room. I don’t know how hot it was, but it was hot as f*ck. So you’re just sweating everywhere, and you just leave feeling so good.

So today, as I’m recording this, I’m going to try a yoga sculpt class out, and do the damn thing with that. Because everybody has recommended it. And my friend loves it. So I’m going with my girlfriend, who has a membership there. She’s another CrossFit girl, too.

But it’s funny. Because seriously 6 of us went to yoga class. The other day; we were just all over CrossFit for the day. And these are all girls who love CrossFit just as much s me. But we’re just all over it. So now I’m finding this new rhythm. And trying to figure out what kind of workouts I want to do. And I think I’m going through a hard time of insecurities, and not feeling comfortable in my skin. My weight goes up and down every single day. I work around food every single day. So sometimes I’m overeating, or just snacking all day long, because I’m cooking multiple things.

And, our bodies are honestly constantly changing. Every single day, your body is a little bit different. So to expect it to look like it did a couple of months ago, when things are changing and stressors are changing and whatever else. It’s just; I just start doing the comparison game to other people and to myself. And I just go into rabbit hole of sadness.

So I’ve bee feeling not great in my workouts when I’m doing CrossFit. Meaning, physically I don’t feel good. This doesn’t feel right. I shouldn’t feel like this. And that makes me want to take a step back. But then I worry; am I going to gain weight? Is my body going to change in a different way that I don’t like? Am I doing enough cardio? Am I doing too much cardio? I just go into this tailspin that I don’t always feel on a regular basis. Most of the time, I just go in for my workout. I do it. And then I leave.

I don’t know what’s totally changed. But I’ve just been hard on myself, and I’m trying to not do that. And be a happier person, no matter how my body changes. Because I have a healthy, happy body. And I should be respectful of that. And it’s hard to be sometimes.

So I was thinking about it today; because I really want to see this movie. I want to see the movie I Feel Pretty, with Amy Schumer. If you haven’t seen the previews; I forget. I think she’s on a spin bike, and she’s trying to workout so hard. And she goes flying off of it, and hits her head. And she sees herself differently now. Now she sees herself as a complete model. And she’s confident as f*ck. I keep saying like; I don’t know where that’s coming from.

But she’s sees herself as a model. So now she walks with her head held high, and starts crushing life. And is so confident, and I think starts crushing work and dating and whatever else. So I’ve only seen the previews for it, and I really want to see this movie. But I just want to be like that. I just want to be confident as f*ck. Because whenever you see a person; for me, if I see a person who is so confident, and happy, and content in their skin, and they just glow. I don’t ever think about their weight. It’s just; they look amazing because they are so confident. So I just want to be more like Amy Schumer in I Feel Pretty.

Isn’t she the best? That girl can do no wrong. Her jokes; oh my god, I said like again. What is wrong with me today? Jeeze. Jeeze. She, in her Netflix standup routine. She’s so dirty. I love it! Nowadays, more women are starting to do that. But so many women are talked down to, because they have a dirty mouth or whatever. It’s so f*cking weird. But she just crushes it.

I remember; I heard this thing that when her Netflix show came out, I think she was anti-Trump. So a bunch of people rated it one star and gave her a terrible rating on Netflix. And then I heard Netflix took off the rating abilities because of that. Isn’t that the worst, when people rate because they don’t agree with your opinion? Way to be an adult, you f*ck.

So anyways. I’m just trying to find the balance of what workouts I want to do, what makes me feel best. And I’m just; I’m still having a hard time with it. I just can’t figure it out. But I’ve been loving doing these glute workouts. And I kind of talked about it on the podcast, but I’ve been talking about it a lot on the blog. So more than anything, I just wanted to grow my butt a little bit more. Get a rounder, more taut butt. More perky butt. Because you know gravity is always pulling its way down. And CrossFit isn’t great for your butt. There are some wonderful butts out there in CrossFit, but it’s not great for this bubble butt. The peach emoji butt.

So I started adding in my glute workouts. And I’ve definitely seen a difference. It’s been since late December that I started doing them. I definitely see the difference. I didn’t take any measurements. I did one photo; before photo. But I don’t think I would ever share that. I just; in a thong in my room. No. I’m not one to share thong photos on the internet. Bikini, sure, but thong just feels a little. Like when you’re in slippers in a thong. It just feels too invasive. But who am I to say?

I can definitely see a difference in my butt. And even my legs, as well. So I feel like that’s a hard balance I’m trying to find. Finding that comfortable place that you’re confident in how your body is changing, while knowing it’s going to change. So I say that; what I mean when I say that is my thighs have gotten bigger, and sometimes I feel a little uncomfortable with that. But legs have a hard time getting these toned beautiful legs that you see all over the internet. And I have a hard time building that. I’m just trying to find the balance of building a bigger butt with still;

I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m trying to do. I sound so narcissistic right now. It’s ridiculous. I’m just trying to share that honest story of how I feel and how I try to get out of those feelings. Because I’m not going to live in a time of unhappiness when I have a trip to Guadeloupe and summer is coming. I don’t like being unhappy. So, I need to be Amy Schumer.

Anyway. Let’s do a little update on; because this podcast is going to be a little bit short today because I leave out of town tomorrow, and I’m trying to mass cook recipes and get my post done for tomorrow, and this podcast done for Saturday and get a couple of recipes done. So it’s going to be a little bit on the shorter side.

Especially because I have been dealing with motherf*cking Facebook. So, if you haven’t seen the news; if you don’t watch the news, maybe you don’t know about it. But Mark Zuckerberg, the inventor of Facebook. And Facebook is under fire at this point because they took the information of something like 50 million users. I don’t know if they sold it; I don’t know. They’re doing some creepy stuff. But at the same time; that’s what websites do. They capture your information. And then they use it to whatever; sell you the Nordstrom dress you were looking at, to sell it to you on another website you’re looking at. They take your information, and they use it to their benefit.

So I don’t know what exactly, but it’s like when you sign the terms and conditions. I was watching this Today show little part the other day. And if you print those off, it’s like 35 pages worth of terms and conditions on a single app you have on your phone. I think it was Candy Crush, they had, and it was literally 35 pages of terms and conditions. Telling you how they can pretty much give your information away. And then they’ll capture the information of your friends as well. So if you add somebody on there, they can take your friend’s information. It was crazy.

So we live in that world now that the internet is trying to capture as much information as quickly as possible all the time so they can make your experience and their experience both beneficial. So Facebook is in trouble for selling 50 million users information. And I think Mark Zuckerberg has to testify. And he was saying if he was the best person to testify, he would.

It made me kind of think of the movie; whatever Facebook. Whatever that movie is about Facebook. You’re probably yelling the name to me right now. But whatever that movie is. Mark Zuckerberg totally f*cked over the guy; (hi doggie.) He totally f*cked over the guy that he started Facebook with. And I think; I forget how much money he got in the settlement, but he didn’t get much money. But he must be laughing his ass off now, because Mark Zuckerberg is f*cked. Hopefully. {laughs}

Didn’t they; they lost something like $80 billion in stocks or something f*cking crazy like that. Like, how does that money even make sense? So yeah. He’s having a hard time. And Russians had to do with our election, and he’s selling off information. Facebook has just kind of been in the shitter for a while.

And then as this is all going down; I’m watching this on the news. My Facebook gets hacked. And I thought this was really super interesting. I was listening to; I think her name is Chalene. I think Chalene Johnson. A reader sent me her podcast. And it had her story of getting hacked back in 2015. And all of her social media was hacked. And they were really f*cking with her. Sending her images of inside her social media and stuff; just total assholes.

So as I was listening to that, she talks about how they don’t have to crack your password, they just have to crack your answers. So whatever those questions are. Like; your prom date. Your first car. Your high school. All these different things. And a lot of times, people play those games on social media. Which I think are f*cking stupid, and I probably did them in college. But it’s like; “What’s your stripper name?” And you put your first animal, and the first street you lived on. And that’s your stripper name.

All this information is on the internet. If they do enough research about you; which is pretty easy to get ahold of those type of surveys that you put right there on your social media page. When they want to go crack your password and can’t get your password, they can crack what was your first animal’s name. And what was your first street name, because of this little survey stupid bullsh*t game you played on the internet.

So I thought that was really interesting; I just wanted to put that one out there, because we don’t always think about that. That everything we do is being tracked on the internet. And hackers love this f*cking sh*t. I don’t know who the f*ck hackers are, and what they do. And if they just sit in their basement and just ruin people’s lives. So weird.

So my own story. I totally f*cked myself over. And I always was like; I can’t believe people actually do this. But it happened to me. So I was talking to a friend who works with a brand that I work with regularly. And she was talking about how you can do; if you ever see on Instagram those shopping tags. It will be a little white dot, and you click it, and it says the brand and price and you can click right there and it brings you to the link. Instead of Like to Know it, where you have to screenshot or go to the app or get the email or whatever it is. This brings you directly to it.

So, you have to set your page up to be branded content to be able to do this. So I was trying to figure out the steps, because there’s not a ton of information out there. I was trying to figure out the steps to do this, and you have to pretty much; I don’t know. You have to add this thing to your Facebook. And Facebook has to accept you as a person who will have branded content. So I’m waiting to hear back from Facebook. And then the very next day, I get an email that says there’s copyright infringement on your Facebook. And I’m looking at the email, and the email looks perfect. The email looks perfect; it looks like a legitimate Facebook email. Everything. There’s no weird spelling errors.

Because I’ve had one from Instagram; a few from Instagram that says, “We want to make you,” whatever that is when you get your checkmark. “We want to give that to you. Just click here.” And on Instagram, it looked like an L instead of an I, so there were easy mistakes with that. And I’ve never heard of Instagram reaching out to people. But if you don’t know better, whatever. So I ignored those, erased them.

So then I get this Facebook email. Everything looks right, and I’m like; oh my god, what does it mean there’s copyright infringement? Did I f*ck something up when I was trying to add this branded content to my Facebook page? So of course, clicked the link. Hackers come in, totally f*ck me over. They go in. They are in my Facebook right away. They lock me out of administrative role of my page. And now I’m an editor on my page, and they have administrative rights.

Of course, right away I knew I had done something wrong. I knew that I was the idiot that I couldn’t believe people actually clicked links. Because always, if you ever get an email. Go into your Facebook, or go into your Instagram. I don’t know about Instagram, but Facebook you can check inbox and see if anything has been sent to you, and you’ll have that information there.

So I knew I was f*cked. I changed my password right away. And I’ve changed my password 3 different times now. Does not matter. I still do not have administrative role over my page. I’m still just an editor. I can’t see who has administrative roles. I can’t see anything. And then what they started to do was spam all of my PaleOMG readers. And not spam my page itself. They’re not putting anything on my actual timeline. They are putting it in; it’s on my timeline, but they hide it from my timeline. But it’s spammed to any of my readers newsfeeds.

So you’ll see PaleOMG shared this link. And it’s the most f*cked up links ever. I mean, it’s from f*cked up, to what are you talking about, to creepy. There was one for reusable toilet paper. There’s ones about spiders crawling everywhere. There’s ones about celebrities, like Kim Kardashian. And they start spamming these links, one a minute. I should seriously log back onto my computer right now and see what they’ve been doing.

And I don’t know how it happens that I changed my password, and still I’m completely f*cked. They’re still in. These spam links are going up one a minute for days. There are thousands of links. Thousands. So as soon as this happens; the second it happens, my phone is blowing up. And it’s; I think you got hacked. I think you got hacked. Message, message. Email, email. Text, text. Person at the gym. Another person at the gym. So they’re just going f*cking crazy telling me, just trying to help me out. Telling me. And there’s nothing I can do.

And then; people are so f*cking dumb. They think I’m sharing these links. When I have; for the past 8 years the only thing I’ve ever shared is recipes, my dog, my outfits, my fitness, and all of these link back to my Instagram and my PaleOMG page. And suddenly I’m talking about Kim Kardashian’s ass and linking to reusable toilet paper. Are you f*cking serious? You think that’s me? Do you have any sort of brain?

So I’m getting these rude emails too, that are like, “I can’t believe you would share this kind of content. I hope this isn’t you. How could you?” And then they’re sending me screen shots of the people who are leaving me terrible comments on these hidden links that I can’t even see. I don’t even see them. And I don’t see people’s comments. But then of course I’m getting screen shots of people who are like, “I can’t believe this woman doesn’t understand that your Facebook was hacked” and she’s just telling me what a disgusting, terrible human being I am.

I’m like; how dumb are you? Do you live under a f*cking rock? Have you never heard of anybody getting hacked before? I don’t understand it, and I can’t believe you would think that was real. So obviously these people don’t follow. They just clicked a link and said; “I’ll follow this page.” At some point. I don’t’ get it.

So this was on Friday last week. I’m just getting so many emails, so many messages. I’m losing it. F*cking losing it. I’m changing my passwords. I’m doing all the reporting. And it’s looking through my page, and it’s saying that everything is fine. There’s no abusive content on my page. And people are reporting links. And if Facebook, I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to reach out to Facebook, but it’s literally f*cking impossible.

So, Facebook is one of the biggest companies in the world. Their product is f*cking humans. And they have no humans that you can talk to. Before people; everyone wanted to work at Facebook, right? It was the biggest place to work at. And to have that on your resume; how amazing would that be. Now they’re probably embarrassed to say they work at Facebook because of all the sh*t that’s going down at this point.

So when your product is people; how do you not have any people to talk to? So I reach out to every single email I can find. People are sending me emails that they use when they had an issue with Facebook. People are telling me when their Facebook got hacked, it didn’t get fixed for 5 months. So I had a meltdown. Because, my business is online. So when a business comes to me; I say, here are my numbers. Here are how many hits I get on my website every day. Here are my number of followers on Facebook. On Instagram. On Twitter. On Pinterest. On YouTube. And I give them all of this information in one total number.

And they say; “OK. We’d love you to share this post and share it on Facebook.” And then I say; oh, my Facebook is being hacked and spammed. And of course I just don’t know what that looks like to an outside brand. And how they feel about that.

So I have a meltdown. I went to the mall, and my husband called me right as I was pulling up to the mall. And you know when someone that you really wanted to talk to finally calls you, and it’s just like, you let it all out? So I’m having the panic attack where you can’t catch your breath. And I’m trying to explain this story to him, but I can’t get the words out. And I’m just; I’m totally helpless. I can’t do anything. I literally can’t do anything at this point.

Friends have reached out who have said, “I have a contact at Facebook.” None of those Facebook contacts will write back. I even got someone at Facebook who follows me on Instagram, and she said that she did everything she can, and it’s saying the ticket that she filed is saying that there’s nothing wrong with my Facebook.

{laughs} So, it’s just this never-ending cycle. I’ve reported everything and it sends me in the same f*cking stupid circle. They have a phone line you can call, and it’s like, “Hey we don’t have anybody for you to go talk to. So go f*ck yourself! Go to Facebook.com/support.” It’s ridiculous.

And it’s so sad, because I love Instagram. But Instagram is owned by Facebook. So it’s like, if you hate one you’re really hating both. But to me, now I’m like; ok. I have access into my Facebook. And because I changed my password multiple times, I can get in. Obviously, this guy, whoever these hackers are are still getting in, because they’re sending spam links constantly still. Everybody’s reporting them. And then Facebook comes back that this isn’t abusive content, so you can’t even report it. It’s like; you suck at your job, Facebook. You have one job! You have a lot of jobs. But you have one job. Whatever.

Anyway. I have been thinking about taking my Facebook down altogether. And huge companies have done this. I forget what companies. I know the Chive did it. I know Tesla did it. They just took their Facebook down altogether and pulled out. Here’s the thing. I’m not Tesla. I’m not the Chive, obviously. I’m a very small fish in a very big pond.

And to me, I want to erase my personal Facebook. I don’t ever get on my personal Facebook. I don’t give a f*ck about what’s happening on other people’s Facebook. Because people are just posting all this terrible sh*t. It’s like; you go onto your newsfeed and it’s terrible stuff about Trump. It’s terrible stuff that’s happening in the news. Puppy mills. Awful, awful stuff that just gets bombarded on Facebook. And I don’t want my personal Facebook. I don’t care about looking at other people’s. I don’t care about what someone from my high school is doing. I do not give a sh*t. If I did, I would be friends with them, and I would be texting them.

So I want to get rid of my Facebook altogether. So I’m wondering if I delete my personal Facebook, if that will deactivate my PaleOMG page, as well. But at the same time, brands come to me and they want to work together because of the following I’ve built up over the past 8 years of working on this blog. And it’s organically grew. So now I’m between this rock and this hard place of not being able to change it. My Facebook is overrun by a person who is not me. And I can’t do anything about it. And I can’t contact to do anything about it.

My web developer; that’s when I knew it was bad when my web developer said that I needed to get in contact with Facebook immediately. So I’m just kind of f*cked. And I don’t know what to do. Do I erase it? Do I just keep it up as this page that’s just spam that I can’t really add to? I can add random sh*t to, but it doesn’t matter because nobody sees it in the first place, because I don’t pay thousands upon thousands of dollars to a terrible company every single day. Or do I take it down and not have those numbers anymore? And then people still don’t see it because they didn’t see it in the first place.

Do you see what I’m saying? I’m between a rock and a hard place. Squishing it. I need my namaste right now. Namaste in bed, you know what I’m saying?

So anyway. If you see any links, because I’m not sharing any f*cking links. If it doesn’t go to www.PaleOMG.com, if it doesn’t go to an outfit, it is not mine. I did not link about lesbian survivors out of a cult. What are you talking about?

Speaking of cults, did you guys see Wild, Wild Country? It’s pretty slow. It’s a little bit boring. But it’s pretty f*cking crazy. It’s just about pretty much a cult. They call it a different religion, but I’m like; ok, you’re a cult. You’re crazy. But I think that about a lot. I’ll shut my mouth.

But, they start this religion. And you can only wear red, or maroon. So they get this; watch it on Netflix. This new religion that was started in, I think India. They come to the US. They buy land in Oregon. Which I had no idea about this story. Probably because I wasn’t born yet. But they buy land in Oregon. And they create this compound. And it’s like, just pretty much this religion is just have sex with everybody. That’s what their religion is. No marriage. But everybody should marry.

It gets crazy. They try to kill people. And it’s bananas. It’s a very interesting religion. I’m like, no wonder people wanted to be in it. You get to have sex with everybody. It’s like yoga where you’re throwing your body around. They have this one part where they would have therapy sessions, and they would all sit naked in a room together; men and women. And they’re screaming, and then they just run into each other, and fight each other. Flap around like they’re having a seizure. It’s f*cking so weird.

My husband fell asleep 47 times, and he would wake up thinking big things happened, and nothing had happened.

And there were children in this compound. Parents would decide that they wanted to change to this insane religion. They would go to this compound, and take their children with them. I’m like; can we have the children’s stories? I wanted to see what they grew up to be. Because who gives a f*ck about you. Let’s talk about how you just ruined your children’s life. That’s what I want to know about. They need another documentary about children cult survivors. They do.

But watch that. It’s a good documentary. It’s very well done. It’s slow. Believe me. But it’s like the most right and left people. You have; it will be like, “I don’t like any people having sex outside of marriage.” And then, I forget, Rajnish people, are humping across the street. And they said you go into the compound, and there were people just having sex all over, and screaming as loud as possible. And you would hear people having sex at night, screaming. Jesus. It’s quite interesting.

Ok. This is an easy transition. (Not at all.) But if you’re in Denver, I have an event coming up. It’s always weird to talk about events on a podcast. Because think about how many times you’ve listened to a podcast; 20 years later, and sorry if you’re listening to this 20 years later.

But I have an event coming up. I’m very excited about it. Transition from sex on a compound to Denver event. There will be no sex at this event. Just forewarning, ok. Just letting you know.

So I teamed up with Tula. It’s a skin brand. I’ve talked about it on the blog a million times. So I use their products almost; totally daily. I use products in the morning and at night. And I love them so much. Their probiotic skincare line. They’re just the best. And the people behind it are even cooler.

They wanted to put on an event. I’m sure they’re going to start doing this in multiple places. I don’t know if we’re the first one they’re doing. But they’re coming to Colorado. They’re doing one in Boulder with an amazing blogger. And then they’re doing one in Denver with me.

So on April 15th; that is a Sunday. That’s about 2 weeks from right now. A little over two weeks. It’s going to be at 3 p.m. and 6 p.m. There are going to two different timed events, so you choose whatever you want. And it’s going to be at Just Be Kitchen. I’ll put this in the show notes if I remember. Sunday April 15th, 3 p.m. and 6 p.m. at Just Be Kitchen.

So if you haven’t seen me talk about Just Be Kitchen, I don’t know where you’ve been. It’s one of my favorite places in Denver. It’s a paleo restaurant. The owner, Jennifer, is amazing. And I’m so lucky to have her letting us do our event. Because they just opened for dinner, as well. So we’re cutting off their dinner spot to host this event. So it’s so nice of her to let us come in.

This event is going to be super fun. First of all, grab bags with a ton of different products that I love. We were able to source some products that I absolutely love and get them for these grab bags. So you’re going to get a free bag of goodies once you buy a ticket. And then there’s going to be snacks from Just Be Kitchen. There’s going to be skin consultations with Tula. So they’re going to talk to you about your skin. And then there’s going to be question and answer session with me. And I’m just going to do a little talk about my own health journey. Through fitness, and beauty, and food, and how really food changed my life. And it changed my skin as well.

I’m going to talk about all of that. And I hope people come with questions. Because it’s always awkward when you have a question and answer session and you’re sitting there silent. Totes fun.

So please come if you’re in Denver, on April 15th. I would love to have you. There are going to be event tickets on Tula.com/PaleOMG and it will lead you right there. I’ll put that in the show notes, if I remember.

It’s going to be a super fun event with cool people. Hopefully it’s helpful information to you and you just enjoy yourself. That’s what we want more than anything.

People have always asked if I was going; and I hate when people say that. All these people ask me to do this meet up; it’s been like three people. They’re like; Hey, are you ever going to do a meet up in Denver? Three. So whenever I say “these people” I mean three people. So narcissistic.

So, when these three people asked me if I’d ever do a meetup, I just didn’t know how that would look and how I would put it together. And Tula is making this happen, which is so cool that I can actually host my first meet up thanks to them. And make it way more fun than just me being like, “Hi. I’m here. Ok bye.” This is an actual cool event to be at. So I hope you guys come. And show your pretty little faces. And we can meet up and do the damn thing.

And this is the weekend before I go on my trip to Guadeloupe. I’ve mentioned it I think already on the podcast. I’m so freaking excited about it. I did a podcast, I think, about my Caribbean trip. It was back in august. So coming up; I don’t know, what is that? I don’t know. 8 months or so that I did this trip.

I was on this trip with my friend Vanessa. I took my sister-in-law with me because my husband couldn’t come. So Tradewinds is this catamaran company that sails all over the place. Excuse me. I’m burping Greek meatballs and loaded fries. I just ate, ok. That’s disgusting. I know you think I’m gross, because I am.

So Tradewinds is this catamaran company, and they sail all over the place. So you rent out your cabin, and you can be part of their program where I think you get a certain amount of points. It’s a point system. But I’m just renting out a cabin. We’re going with 8 other strangers, plus the first mate and the cabin.

Oh my gosh, doggie! I hope you guys just heard that.

So, I wanted to go somewhere fun for my 30th birthday. And in about 20 or so days, I turn 30. I’m 30, flirty, and thriving. And I will turn 30 on a Tradewinds boat in the Caribbean waters right outside Guadeloupe. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s just this Caribbean island; French Caribbean island. They take Euros there. There’s a fun fact that I learned when I was looking it up. Because I need to get Euros beforehand, and I should start planning this early. Because it is going to be madness leading up to it. Just scrambling, getting everything done with the blog so my blog can kind of keep going as I am sailing.

My hackers can just keep hacking away. Like, just little f*cks they are!

I’m so excited to go on this trip. This last Tradewinds trip I went on was through the Caribbean. We went to three different islands, but 12 different stops. (I’m starting to yawn, because Jackson is too.) We went to 12 different stops, and it was the best trip of my life. I loved it so freaking much, and wanted to go back instantly as soon as we were getting off the boat. I just wanted to be back on the boat. It was just the trip of a lifetime. So I’m so excited to get to go back.

And last time, I didn’t know everybody but I knew a few people on the boat and everybody else was friends. So even though we didn’t know each other, we knew we’d get along. And this one is going to be with complete strangers. So they could be from all over the world. They could be young, they could be old. They could not speak English. I don’t know. But it will be so interesting. I’m so excited for this adventure.

I was watching; I love following this one girl on Instagram. Her name is Dress up Buttercup. How cute is that? She is the cutest thing in the entire world. I want to put her in my pocket. I want to hold her like a little doll. She’s so adorable. And I was watching her Instagram story. I need to go back to it, because she is 26 years old, and her mom. I think; her mom is a flight attendant. So gets buddy passes or something. I don’t know if they get cut off when she’s 26, or something. Or free flights, something like that.

So her and her husband just decided to hop on a flight. When they got to the airport, they didn’t know where they were going to go. They just wanted to fly on a certain kind of plane, and fly first class. And they were on this gigantic crazy airplane with, I don’t know if it was gigantic. I just imagine it gigantic, because it was the craziest first class. Where you have your own little tiny cabin inside of a plane.

I totally want to fly first class! I want to fly on a personal private jet, and I want to fly first class. Some day in my life! Some day!

So anyway. They went to the airport not knowing where they were going to go. And then they were going to Germany. They were like; ok, it looks like we’re going to Germany. But we don’t want to stay in Germany, so I don’t know where they were going after that. But it was so fun to follow her little adventure.

So I’m hoping to get to share my adventure more. I’m going to try to do video of this trip, and document it even more on the blog. So if you ever think of anything that you love to see when people go on trips, let me know. Because I want to try to make it happen. I’m trying to do more video on my blog. Cooking videos, maybe workout videos soon. We will see. Hopefully I get some of my confidence back, because that’s no fun. That’s no fun filming videos with a sh*tty confident person. Not confident person.

Anyway. I have to go clean my f*ck storm of a kitchen, because I just made these Greek loaded fries. And it’s a complete mess. And then I have to pack, because my sister-in-law and I are driving to Steamboat Springs tomorrow. And we’re going for the weekend.

Which; ok, let me say something real quick. I always try to find a VRBO before; like an AirBNB. Aren’t they owned by the same company? I always try to book one of those before a hotel whenever I’m traveling somewhere. Because I feel like you can find the cutest places for the same price or way cheaper.

So we look up all these VRBO places, and it’s like $134 a night. And we’re like; ok, that’s not bad at all. Let’s do that. We can make that work. So we’re booking for two nights, and then I look. And I’m like; wait. How did the price get to $700?

So I view the details. And the management fee was $300. It was almost as much as booking the; no I guess that was a little bit less. It was more than booking the two nights. The management fee was more. How does that make any sense? I don’t know or understand that kind of stuff, but I know I did not purchase that place. I was not going to spend $700 on two nights in a sh*tty condo. What? So we’re staying in a hotel.

Isn’t that weird? I haven’t ever seen that. Management fees that are that expensive. If anybody can explain that to me, that would be wonderful. Because I don’t want to Google it. Because I don’t care that much. But if you want to explain it to me; cool. That’d be neat. That’d be nice. That’d be great.

I know I can count on hearing from you guys before I can hear from Facebook.

So, if you also have a way. If you’re a hacker. And you’re like; I just love listening to Juli. And I’m a hacker, but I’m a good hacker, and you want to help me out, let me know. That would be awesome. Because Facebook is a joke. Good luck, Mark Zuckerberg. Good luck. You have a great wife, it seems like. I feel bad talking sh*t about him, because I bet he’s a nice human being. But I hate him.

Ok. So I’m going to go do the damn thing. I’m going to go to yoga sculpt. And I’ve got to get my blog post ready for tomorrow. I will talk to you soon. Thanks so much for coming over here today to listen to me talk about random sh*t. Don’t forget to do the two-step authentication on your Instagram, on your Facebook. And do not click any links ever that you get into your email. Just erase.

If someone really wants to get ahold of you, they’ll f*cking call you. Right? And leave a voicemail, too. That’s how you know they really want to talk to you. If they leave a f*cking voice mail. But don’t answer your phone. Do the two-steps on all of your different social medias. And change your passwords regularly. And you know what? Lie when they ask what high school did you go to. Lie. Say the Phantom of the Opera. That was my high school. Who was your first date? Oscar the grouch. Whatever. Say what you need to say. Lie. Just remember those lies. Or else you’ll f*ck yourself over.

That part’s hard. Remembering lies is hard in general. But don’t forget to never click a link. I always judge people so hard, and then I did it. So trust no one. At the end of the day, here’s what you learned from this podcast. Trust absolutely no one. Because they will f*ck you. Ok?

Happy day. That’s so sad. You can trust one person, I’ll give you that. Ok? That’s all you get.

Ok, go have a great day. Don’t forget to go to the blog. Because I have; I shared three recipes this week. I shared a coconut cake collage shake. I shared a blueberry protein smoothie ball. And then I shared pad Thai shrimp lettuce cups. And then I talk about why I love collagen. I share my weekly workouts. And I’m sharing maxi dresses on the blog. So I have all kinds of new content for you.

Don’t forget that if you want to sign up for my event that’s going on in Denver, go to Tula.com/PaleOMG. And the tickets will be there. I’ll try to put that in the show notes, if I remember. If not, say you’re the worst Juli. And I’ll say; you are correct.

Ok, I have to go. I love you long time. Bye-bye.

120 episodes available. A new episode about every 7 days averaging 62 mins duration .