My Favorite Things – Episode 23: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast


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Sharing my favorite things is one of my favorite podcasts to do! Something I forgot to mention that I’ve been loving lately is drinking a gallon of water every day. I drink a ton of water already but I’ve been trying to track it and make sure I drink over a gallon and it’s been really easy for me! Below are all the links from the podcast, but let me know if you have any questions at all! Have an awesome rest of your week!

Links in post:

Thank You to the Sponsors:

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  • Chocolate Spread
  • Hot Chocolate (with Collagen)


I may be compensated through my affiliate links in this post, but all opinions are my own. This compensation is used to keep this blog and podcast up and running!

Episode 23 Transcription Coming Soon!

1. Juli’s weekend update [13:17]
2. Bachelor weekly update [18:03]
3. Juli’s favorite things in working out [26:00]
4. Fascia blaster update [35:22]
5. Juli’s favorite thing in beauty [42:53]
6. Favorite things in food [49:13]
7. Favorite things in clothing [55:56]
8. Weekly PaleOMG blog recap [58.02]

Juli Bauer: I love chocolate. And I’m a person who loves to have a little chocolate every day. But the last thing I want to feel is like I’m addicted to sugar. Luckily, I have found a chocolate that not only rocks my world, but it doesn’t give me a massive sugar spike and headache afterwards. Eating Evolved is my absolute favorite chocolate brand out there. Their chocolate is gluten free, dairy free, soy free, and paleo. And it’s sweetened with coconut sugar; and it’s organic. It’s pretty much just like pure love; yeah, that’s what it is.

And; they have one of my favorite treats, which is their coconut butter filled chocolate cups that are seriously to die for. And right now, you can get a special PaleOMG bundle pack for just being a PaleOMG Uncensored listener. In that bundle, you’re going to get all my favorites, including their almond sea salt primal chocolate bar; their caramel sea salt coconut butter cups, along with their classic coconut butter cups. Their brand new sweet and salty roasted coconut butter, that you can just eat straight up with a spoon. And their chocolate spread; and hot chocolate that has collagen in it. And I’ll be talking about collagen today, anyways, so you better listen up.

The original price is $43.95, but you can get all these items right now for $35 plus free shipping. All you have to do is go to and check it out right there. You can just put it in your cart; check out; boom. You don’t even need a code. Go support this amazing company and their Fair Trade certified and Rainforest Alliance certified chocolate. They are awesome; and you going to be awesome once you try this stuff. Check it out.

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: For a few weeks now, I’ve been telling you about Aaptiv; the fitness app that has tons of workouts that you can listen to, follow along with, and enjoy since all the music they play is awesome. You can literally have a trainer at your fingertips walking you through every workout. Since I’ve been doing CrossFit and Orange Theory classes mostly, I simply turn on my Aaptiv app when I get back from the gym, and stretch for 5-7 minutes with a trainer walking me through all the stretches. It’s awesome, and it holds me accountable because I hate stretching.

And other people have been loving it, too. Just today I had Amanda from my blog say, “I’m currently trying out Aaptiv on your recommendation; it’s been 3 days and I already love it!” So cool! Thank you, Amanda! Thanks for leaving that comment, that’s awesome.

And right now, you can try out Aaptiv for free for 30 days. All you have to do is go to That’s A-A-P-T-I-V, and use the promocode PaleOMG. That’s P-A-L-E-O-M-G, and you’ll get your first 30 days for free to try it out. Try out the workouts; they have marathon training programs; yoga, indoor cycling, even meditation. So no matter what kind of workouts you’re into, they have something for you. Go try it out, get excited about your fitness goals this year. That’s, and promocode PaleOMG.

Just a quick reminder, in case you’re new to the podcast. It will most likely have explicit language, explicit content, and for sure sexual content today. Because we’re talking about 50 Shades of Grey. So that’s what the E next to my podcast means. Enjoy!

Juli Bauer: Hey there guys! Welcome to PaleOMG Uncensored. My name is Juli Bauer. Juli Bauer Roth, officially. I need to change that name at some point; but that f*cking shit is annoying. But welcome to the podcast today. If I sound like I’m a hot mess and I’m going to hock up phlegm the entire time, that’s because I caught a bit of a head cold. And I’m f*cking pissed about it. I think people who are sick are gross, and now I’m that gross person, and I blame it on the other sick people, ok. I don’t have kids because I don’t want to get their sickness that they pick up at school; and I like to live in a very small bubble of my gym, and my house, and now I decided to venture out the other day, and a couple of my friends were sick, and those b*tches got me sick. Those damn, damn b*tches. But you know what? We needed to go to the movie theater to see 50 Shades Darker.

So; I have read the first book, 50 Shades of Grey. And then I started reading the second book when I was traveling a lot for work, and then once I stopped traveling I stopped reading the book. So, I never finished the second book when things were getting really good, and I just didn’t finish it. Once I’m at home, I just never read when I’m at home, for some reason.

So, I loved the books. I’m all about that soft porn for women; all about it. And honestly, everybody said the first movie sucked and they all hated it; and I did not see why people hated the first movie. I thought it was good. I was like; I’m feeling hot and heavy over here. I’m sweating. I’m into it. I’m ready to go to f*cking Fascinations and buy; oh my god, I hope my mother-in-law or mother aren’t listening to this podcast. But if you are, just shut this off. But I was ready to go to Fascinations and buy all the weird ass sh*t they have in there. That’s what that movie does to you. You’re like; sure I’ll try nipple clamps. F*ck no, I’m not trying nipple clamps.

But, anyways. We go see this movie. I honestly liked the first one better than the second one. I thought the second one was very sporadic; and if you hadn’t read the book, you were like; “Wait, what? How did that part of the movie get just kind of pushed off to the side and not really talked about?” I don’t want to be a spoiler, or anything, but he gets in an accident in the movie, and it seems like nothing ever happened. He was in this massive accident, and they don’t talk about that part at all. And I know they have more books; or more movies coming out, probably will elaborate on it more, but I just thought they were skipping over big parts.

But the sex scenes? F*cking money. They were so good. So weird to watch in a theater. Looking behind us, it looked like there was a father/daughter sitting behind us. Maybe it was just an old dude with a really young chick; go you guy. But that made us feel weird. But the sex scenes were awesome. Awesome. I loved them so much.

So I thought both movies were good; I just thought the second movie wasn’t as good. But now I want to finish the books and just get hot and heavy on an airplane surrounded by disgusting strangers who are all sick, as well.

And, I have a couple of trips coming up. I’m going to LA in two weeks; which I hate LA. I hate going to LAX. I tried to figure out any other flight that I could fly into, but they were like, triple the price. So I have to fly into LAX, and that is the worst airport known to man. I did see Kylee and Kendall Jenner last time I was there, and that was really interesting. I’ve never stared at someone so much. It was so crazy to see an entire crowd turn and stare. Because we don’t really have that in Colorado; I’m sure if you live in LA, you get that all the time with famous people. But it was like, the entire airport, including security, who is supposed to be watching for bombs through the f*cking detectors; everybody stopped and turned and watch Kendall and Kylee Jenner. It was very interesting.

But anyways; I’m going to LA in two weeks for Expo West. This was like a last minute decision. Expo West is like a natural foods expo, and I’ve never been to it, but I know a bunch of bloggers go. And my friend Cassy; she was on the podcast a couple of times ago, and then Vanessa, who was on the podcast last week; and then our friend, Diane Sanfilippo, all three of us are going and just going to hopefully eat a lot of food. I’ve never had crazy amazing food in LA, but who knows; maybe it could happen this time around.

Anyways. So yeah, I have LA coming up, and then I have a trip to San Diego with my husband; and then I have Costa Rica, and then I might have Dallas on the books, too. So I have a lot of traveling coming up. And usually I just work on the plane, but maybe I can just get hot and heavy next time around. Hopefully.

Oh, I do have to apologize. I know this podcast is echo-y, and I cannot figure out why the f*ck it is. Because I use just my little iPhone headphones, or I use my microphone, and it’s all echo-y. and you know what, guys? I don’t have a f*cking booth with a sound guy recording my sh*t. I’m figuring this out along the way. So people come bitch at me; I’m like, I don’t know what I’m f*cking doing! I’m just pulling sh*t out of my ass every second. So sorry it’s echo-y. I apologize now. And I apologize last week; {laughs} if you listened to my podcast with Vanessa, because music just shot out of nowhere, like 54 minutes in. just, hey, a little music while we go. What the f*ck? I don’t know what I’m f*cking doing.

{sigh} That’s just how my life is, guys. That’s what happens when you own your own business and you’re trying to figure out what you have never been taught before. So I’m chugging along, guys. I’m trying to swim; trying to keep my head above water. If you could see me right now; I’m paddling. Anyways.

Let’s talk about the CrossFit Open. Because the CrossFit Open starts; when you listen to this podcast, the first workout has already been announced. If you don’t know what the CrossFit Open is, it’s like this massive world-wide competition. So; excuse me. {laughs} Eww, gross. So, if you want to be in the CrossFit Games, the first step to being in the CrossFit Games is the CrossFit Open, and that leads into Regionals, and that leads into the CrossFit Games. But a ton of people who will never make it to the Games, as well, sign up for it. Like, 99% of the people.

So our gym, we make a big thing of it. I think we have like 70-80 people signed up. And every Friday, we all do the workout together, and every single class, and people hang out at night. We cheer each other on, and partner up, and judge each other. It’s awesome. It’s a super fun time. I used to compete in CrossFit, so the Open used to be an incredibly stressful, sweaty time of the year where I was just nervous all of the time, and doing the workouts multiple times to make sure I did the best I could to make it to Regionals and get to Regionals.

But nowadays, it’s just pretty much, I’m just doing it because I’m a coach and I’m supposed to be supportive of other people doing it. And it really is a fun time. So yeah, I’m signed up for it. The only thing {laughs}; like what the. Ok, this is what they said this year. That there is going to be a dumbbell workout. So, all these CrossFit gyms had to buy all these dumbbells; like, way to be a f*cking asshole, CrossFit Games. It’s like, CrossFit gyms don’t spend enough on equipment that they need to buy 10 more pair of dumbbells. Way to be an asshole. I think every company that sells dumbbells was sold out. It was such a f*cking sh*t show. F*ck you, CrossFit Games. Sorry to be rude; but f*ck you.

So, the Open is starting tomorrow, and I just picture {laughs} Castro, who makes up these workouts or whoever else, pulling out of his. He’s like, “So I need you to go to a pool, and swim a mile, and then I need you to run the neighborhood, run a mile. I just pull sh*t out of my ass.” Because on my Explore feed, on my Instagram, it’s just littered with women running in bikinis at CrossFit competitions; like on a treadmill. If I was ever forced to swim and then run in my swimsuit in front of other people, I would be f*cking livid. I would shank someone. No thank you; I’m never running in a swimsuit. I’ve run on the beach many times, and I’m pretty sure I ran in pants all those times on the beach. No, no, no. No swimsuit. More power to those women. Those are some brave ass women. No. No.

So anyways, we’ll see what these workouts are. Not really into it, or care. But it will be fun to hang out at the gym, because I love my gym so much. I was like, thinking I was going to quit my gym completely and not coach anymore, but I just f*cking love that gym, and I love the people so much, so I’m still coaching two classes a week. Because I love that gym.

1. Juli’s weekend update [13:17]

But anyways. Let’s move on. Let’s talk about what happened over the weekend. My husband, we had this exciting date night planned. So we’re like; ok. Because, by the way, my sister-in-law liked to throw it out there that my husband and I are boring. His sister said we are boring. She’s like, you don’t do anything. The thing is; I don’t like to do anything, because everything as an adult includes drinking alcohol. And drinking alcohol makes me feel like sh*t. so that’s why I don’t like to do much. I like to stay in my home; I like to eat my own food; I like to stay away from sick people. {ahem} To getting sick when I went out.

But, I was like, ok we have to do something to prove my damn sister-in-law wrong. We’ve got to do it. So we were like; ok, let’s go to our favorite taco place and then we’ll go to Comedy Works. So we went to this place called Pinche Tacos; I’m pretty sure they had to change that name so it’s something stupid now. But we went to this place called Pinche Tacos here; it’s like one of my favorite taco places in Denver; and then we went to Comedy Works to see Heather McDonald. If you don’t know who that is, she’s the red head; she’s on the E network a lot. She used to be on Chelsea Lately. So we saw her.

So we go to dinner, have tacos, have a couple of drinks, and then we head over to the Comedy Club, and at the Comedy Club the line is like 4 years long. It was so long. We were the last two seats, because we just sat in our car until the line died down. {laughs} So we were the last two seats in the place. And I love Heather McDonald and I think she is so funny; I loved her in Chelsea Lately, and so I was so excited to see her. And I did not think her standup was funny. And I was so bummed out, because I was really excited to see her. And it was like a two drink minimum; so I had like two sips of this sh*tty martini.

We get towards the end of her show, and it’s like, she’s wrapping things up. And I don’t know if all Comedy Clubs do this, but if you bring your phone in, they give you this little pouch that you have to stick your phone in, and they have the key to unlock it. So you have to wait in this line to unlock your phone. It’s f*cking stupid. I get why they do it, but we left our phones in the car so we could just get out of there and not have to wait in this line. So as she’s wrapping things up, both him and I are getting kind of bored and just want to get out of there, because it was like 11:30 at night. So, he’s like; “I feel a little weird, let’s just get out of here.” So we left before she had totally wrapped it up.

We get home, we go to bed, and I hear him get up, run to the bathroom; I hear him throwing up his face off. And I go to the bathroom, and there’s throw up all over the toilet. And men, as you may know; either you’re a man or you’ve dated a man or you know a man; men are big babies when it comes to sickness. I don’t think I’ve missed hitting a toilet when I’ve been throwing up since I was 4 years old and didn’t know what throw up was and what was happening to my body. But, I was like; so I come out, and there was throw up all over the toilet. I know, you’re gagging at this moment. But just bear with me. So I’m like; “Hey, do you need to go to the hospital, because you f*cking missed the toilet, dude.” Like, what’s going on. He’s sprawled out just in his boxers or sweat pants or whatever, lying on the floor because he’s so hot and the cold floor. I’m like, I’ll get you water, give him some water and he pretty much wants me to get the f*ck out of there. Which makes sense; I don’t want my husband seeing me throwing up. Who wants to see throw up? No thanks.

So I get out of there, and he’s sick. He only has Sunday’s off, and he’s sick all day on Sunday. And it was pretty much the worst date night out. So, in the end of the day, this is why I stay in, sister-in-law. This is why I’m boring. If I would have made dinner for ourselves, and if I would have made the jokes, because I’m just a great standup comedian, you know, with this husky voice, we would have been fine. But maybe it wasn’t even food poisoning. Maybe it was f*cking stomach flu, and then I caught part of the stomach flu, and I have this sh*t going on. Who knows? Sickness is so gross. I can’t wait for winter to be over. I know people are like; “you’re more likely to get sick in the summer.” But I personally have never been sick in the summer, knock on wood. Where the f*ck is wood? It’s all metal, plastic in this f*cking office. Whatever. So yeah. That’s that. That’s what’s been going on in my life.

2. Bachelor weekly update [18:03]

So, as I’ve been kind of sick, I’ve been listening to a lot of reality show podcasts. And I’m kind of disappointed and hate myself for it. But I just love hearing the backstory about sh*t to the Bachelor stuff. I don’t really watch any other reality TV; like I’m not a Housewives girl; I don’t know, what else is there? I don’t really watch a ton of other; Oh, I watched the Kardashians, but I haven’t watched that in a while. But I love the backstory of when you hear the real story from someone. So I started listening to the Reality Steve podcast, and he’s the one who does all the spoilers and tells you who wins. Like, right as soon as it starts. So I already know who wins, and whatever I won’t say that here. But he brings on guests, and they talk about their experience on the Bachelor, and it’s so interesting. I love them. They’re so addicting. It’s so addicting to listen to.

So I’ve been walking Jackson; it’s been like 80 degrees here in Colorado, the warmest February in history, or something, and so I’ve been taking Jackson on like 47 walks a day, so he’s excessively thin at this point. Ok, not excessive. Don’ think I’m starving my dog. But, he has lost weight, but it’s more so because I just want to listen to my podcast. And it’s the only time I can be like, I can listen to podcasts and not work, is when I’m walking Jackson. So he’s getting 47 walks a day.

Ok, so let’s talk about the Bachelor. Because last week when I had Vanessa on, we talked about Abstainers versus Moderators, and she didn’t watch the Bachelor. And I hate her so much; our friendship is so over. What the f*ck; who doesn’t watch it. And she’s like; watch This Is Us. You can’t compare the Bachelor to This Is Us. It’s like two polar opposites. If you think, “Oh, she loves the Bachelor! She’ll love This Is Us!” No. I don’t want to cry when I watch TV. I don’t. I’m not a crier on a Tuesday night; no thanks. Don’t need that emotional instability. No.

So, let’s talk about what has been happening in the past two weeks. I’m looking at my blog; I don’t know, I can’t even remember what happened last week, but I was going to talk about this past week, because now they have the final 4 going. They have the hometown dates. And this season; am I the only one that is like, this is so boring? Remember the old Bachelor, when it was all about romantic dates and more so about love? It’s now they do the most dumb sh*t all the time. And; ugh, the hometown dates. Raven goes to; or sorry, Nick goes to Raven’s hometown, like Hoxie or some sh*t that I don’t; will never go to. And they’re like ATVing in this giant poop puddle. Like, what are they ATVing in? It’s like a pond. It’s a shallow pond. Do you think you should be making out with a guy in this shallow pond where snakes are probably going up your butt? There are worms going up your genitalia and implanting. No way. So weird. And then Raven’s dad talks about how his cancer is clear; it’s like emotional. The first time Nick’s ever meeting her parents, and everybody is crying, and Nick’s not crying. Nick has cried at every single f*cking moment, and then he’s like, this awkward turtle when her dad’s like, “I’m clear of cancer.” It was so weird. Whatever.

I’m so pissed Raven is not the next Bachelorette. I know why they’re doing it; I know why it’s Rachel. I wish it was Raven, because Raven has good one-liners and she’s f*cking funny. Rachel is just not hilarious funny. She’s funny in like the ha-ha way, but I want f*cking good laughter. I hope Raven is on a Bachelor in Paradise, or whatever.

So, I honestly; nothing happened on Rachel’s date. Her dad wasn’t there. I found out her dad is like a federal judge or something. Can you believe Rachel’s dad was like; “yeah, you should totally go on the Bachelor. You’re a lawyer, but go on the Bachelor. I’m a federal judge, that seems like a great idea for your career choice.” What?! What?! Nothing happened. It was so boring.

And then Nick goes to Corrine’s house, whatever, she lives in Miami or something. They go shopping and she spends $4,000 on him. Do you think that’s real? Could you imagine spending $4,000? Maybe you have, but I have personally never spent $4,000 on clothing shopping. It’s f*cking crazy. Do you think that’s real, or do you think the show; the producers were like; “here’s $4,000; go play with Nick. Get him shirtless, get him in his underwear, we’ll get the camera crew back there.” Whatever.

They have dinner; and the producers, what the hell are they thinking when they’re like, “Hey, try her dad’s olives, and we’re going to cut this into a 5-minute segment in the show talking about how Nick isn’t that into marinated olives.” What? That part was so weird. It was so f*cking whack.

So Corrine says she’s in love with him. She’s never been on a one-on-one date; she’s known him 6 weeks; whatever. But that’s how the show is. And her dad ends the whole conversation by saying, “I think he’s the lid to her pot.” Is that a saying? Has anyone in the history of time used that as a love metaphor? No. The answer is no. her dad looked like a giant triangle. He kind of looked like; what is that movie? Dammit. I’m going to forget it now. I’ll come back to that. But her dad’s a giant triangle, shape-wise. It was very interesting. Whatever.

And then Vanessa. Vanessa’s hometown date. Why is Vanessa on the Bachelor in America? Why isn’t she on the Bachelor Canada? Don’t they have Bachelor Canada? I don’t get it. Unless she wants to move to the states, which she probably doesn’t because she has like 47 people deep in her family in Canada. So they go on her date; he has to meet her mom’s side of the family, which is like 15 people. And then she goes to her dad’s side of the family; which is just her step-mom and her dad. Which, obviously nobody likes him, there are just two people. And then; I don’t know. It was just a really boring day. Whatever.

Let’s see; is there anything else? I don’t know. That was it. That was so boring. None of the dates were exciting. I miss the days of brothers trying to fight the bachelor, or something. Those were the good old days. Do you think those are really their houses that they go into? And do you think the rooms are staged? Because I feel like there’s usually not anything on the walls. Like, Raven’s parent’s house, I was like; is that, like they made that out of an office in a room? I’d like to know that piece.

So that’s all I have on the Bachelor recap this week. Hopefully if you’re into the Bachelor; because if not, you’ve been listening to that a lot. A lot. But that’s all I have for you on that. I think I’d like to get on with the podcast, since we’re 25 minutes deep.

3. Juli’s favorite things in working out [26:00]

Let’s talk about this week, my favorite things right now. I want to talk about what I’m loving, results I’ve been getting from things that I love; let’s talk about it all. I wanted to talk about it here, because what I’m loving lately is kind of mixing up my workout routine. So I’ve been doing CrossFit for probably 6-7 years at this point, and I love it. I think if you want to build muscle, and you want to get fitter, and you want to get the most bang for your buck; I think CrossFit is where it’s at if the gym has great programming. I really think you get your money’s worth when it comes to CrossFit. It just has weights; it has heavy weights, it has light weights, it has gymnastics; it has running, rowing, biking; it just has everything and the workouts are just awesome.

But, I get sick; I’ve just gotten sick of going to the same place every single day kind of, and I just wanted to do something different. I did Orange Theory when I was on book tour over a year ago, so I just decided to add it back into my routine because I have a gym; I have a couple of Orange Theory gyms really close to me. So I’ve been doing that, and I love it. I just love; I’ve been trying to do CrossFit and then a Fit workout at our gym, which is kind of like a boot camp style, high intensity type training, and then Orange Theory workout.

So a quick rundown on Orange Theory; it’s a workout that has a trainer running it, and it usually has average; sorry, I’m having to yawn and my throat is killing me. It has an average of like, say 20 people in the class, maybe more depending on what time you go. So half the people will be on treadmills, and half the people will be on the weights. So the trainer will be coaching both people; so they’ll be telling you what you’re doing on the treadmill. So you start on the treadmill; they’ll say, “we’re going to start at a base pace, and you’re just going to be running 2 minutes at this base pace. Once we get to the 2-minute mark, we’re going to push pace it for 2 minutes, and then we’re going to do an all-out sprint for 30 seconds.” And every day is a little bit different; sometimes you’re doing an endurance, longer workout on the treadmill like 30 minutes; sometimes you’ll be doing strength on the treadmill, so you’ll be 10 minutes on the treadmill 10 minutes on the floor; and then you’ll be doing like hill sprints. So they have different kinds of workouts every day that you go.

And then the other half is on the floor, and you’ll have all kinds of different things from weights to TRX to stuff on a Bosu ball; you have all kinds of stuff. And the trainer is taking both groups through the workout, talking to both, and then there’s a TV screen with the workouts up on the board, what you’re doing strength wise on the floor. And then there’s also another TV that’s hooked up to your heart rate monitor. So you either borrow a heart rate monitor, or you buy one; I have my own. And it’s hooked up to the screen, so the trainer can see; I think it’s mostly for the trainer. But it gives you your heart rate, it gives you, maybe beats per minute, and maybe calories that you’ve burned, and then it gives you splat points. I don’t really know what splat points are, but I always just try to get a lot of them. I don’t know what they mean.

But the goal is to stay in the orange zone; which is why it’s Orange Theory, because that’s the fat burning zone. For me, coming from CrossFit, when CrossFit is literally you give it all you’ve got, you f*cking go, and you go, and you go; there’s no really pacing things. I mean, there is pacing, but the pacing is a little bit different than I feel like it is at Orange Theory. Pacing is just making sure that you don’t f*ck yourself up lifting weights versus; I don’t know, it’s just a little bit different.

So, my ability, I think, to push longer and harder is a little bit different because of my CrossFit background in building up that tolerance. I don’t know; it’s kind of hard to explain. So I’m usually in the orange and red zone the most, and I’ve had teacher telling me before to not be in the red zone as much, because then I’m just burning muscle. But I feel like that every single day in CrossFit; I feel like I’m in the red zone, even though I don’t have a heart rate monitor on with CrossFit. But I feel like I am going to die, that’s what it feels like when I’m in that red zone in CrossFit. So, since I’ve been in the red zone all the time with CrossFit, I have not had any trouble with burning muscle, and losing muscle because I’m working too hard or something. So I never listen to that; I just do what my body tells me is right, and I work as hard as I can in the gym.

And I’m loving it because after you finish your workout, you instantly get an email of your summary. So how many calories you burned, your splat points, what percentage of the time you were in each zone; and it’s just cool to get an update every time, and I can compare it to my other updates that I’ve gotten from my other workouts; and I just love that. I like having just something to compare it to. Because for CrossFit, for the longest time, I was always trying to increase my weights, and that’s how I knew I was improving. But now I don’t care about that, and I don’t care about improving weights, I just care about getting a workout in for that day, it’s not about numbers anymore. So it’s nice having something with Orange Theory that I can visually see; say I burned more calories. And I don’t even care about the number of calories; who knows how accurate it is. But it’s cool to be like; “Oh, I burned more calories during this workout, what did I do a little bit different than the last one.” Or, “I got this many splat points, I’m going to try to get more the next time.” I just like to compare, and I think it keeps me motivated and keeps me excited in the gym.

The only thing I don’t like about Orange Theory; and you know, every Orange Theory is different, just like every CrossFit gym is different. I always say if someone doesn’t like CrossFit to try a different gym, because you will have a totally different experience at a different gym. But what I found at Orange Theory is it’s hard to always hear what’s going on, because they’re on a microphone talking to you and then talking to the people on the floor, whether you’re on the floor or on the treadmill. So I sometimes have a hard time hearing what they’re saying. And if they’re talking to me; so sometimes we’d be at a push pace, and I’m like, oh sh*t, I thought we were just at a base pace. And I get a little mixed up, and maybe that’s just me just getting used to it, but I have a hard time hearing what was going on and where I’m supposed to be.

The other thing, I don’t love that they let people; at least at my gym that I’m going to; they let people get away with some movements. We were doing pushups, and this older woman, who can’t physically do pushups is pretty much in a pike position, and she’s going half an inch every time, when they could give her something that would benefit her way more in her workout and improve her strength versus letting her do her random sh*t that’s not improving her strength whatsoever. So I get it; everybody’s workout, you should get whatever you want out of your workout. Oh, hi Jackson! But, I wish they would recognize those things and help people improve those movements; because that’s what we do at our CrossFit gym, at least. We don’t let people get away with sh*t, and we’ll let them; like, ok this guy cannot physically do an overhead squat, we’re not going to have him even f*ck around with it, let’s go to a front squat until we start loosening him up and can test that out again. But I just wish they would do that; and I’m sure other Orange Theory’s do, but that’s my only complaint with it.

But I’ve seriously loved it; it’s been awesome. And me kind of cutting back with CrossFit; I like to use CrossFit as more of my strength days, and push my strength a little bit, and Orange Theory I usually stay pretty light with the weights. And I think, honestly, my hip size has changed a little bit. Whenever I stop with CrossFit, my legs are able to take more of a shape; with CrossFit, it’s kind of bulking my legs up, strengthening them up more, and then once I take a couple of days off, they’re able to recover and they just look a little bit; the muscle look a little bit rounder, my hips look a little bit smaller, as I’ve been doing a little less CrossFit, using CrossFit as my strength days, and then just really letting the muscle heal and going through lighter movements the Orange Theory and Fit days. So I’ve been loving it. I think it’s really great, and it’s been awesome. So yeah; that’s been cool.

4. Fascia blaster update [35:22]

Something that kind of goes along with strength training, I guess. I talked about this before on my podcast, and I wanted to give you guys a little bit of an update. A reader mentioned; when I talked about cellulite once, a reader mentioned that I should try out, I think it’s Ashley Black; I think it’s Ashley Black. Ashley Black fascia blaster. So I looked up fascia blaster, because I’d never heard anything about it before. And so I started watching all the videos online that she has. She has a ton on her Facebook, and then you can find a ton on YouTube. And I started reading more about fascia blasting.

So what that looks like, it’s this little tool. So if you can imagine; you know those handheld rollers that you can roll out your legs? It has like two handles, and then the middle is like rounded things, or kind of spikey balls, and you can roll out your quads, you can roll out different muscles. So it’s kind of like that. If you made your hand like a little bit of a claw, imagine 5 of those; 4 or 5 of those across a stick with handles on two sides. If you’re like; I can’t picture what the f*ck you’re saying, just google it. You’ll figure it out right away.

But, it’s this little tool that you run across your legs. So you go vertically, or you can go horizontally, or diagonally. You just don’t go in circles. What you’re doing is underneath, I think the skin above the fat layer, is this fascia tissue. And, I mean I don’t even think it has to be aggravated, because I’ve had cellulite since I was in the 7th grade and didn’t do sports. So the thing with fascia is, I think it can cross over; please, this is just my take on it, so please listen to the professionals, don’t just listen to me. But the fascia can cross over, and then the fat kind of pushes through and that’s what creates those dimples and that cellulite under the skin.

So with this tool, you run it horizontally and you oil up; she has a special oil, you can use like baby oil. I’ve been using, just using it in the shower every time I shower, and I just like to use body wash. The reader recommended condition, but I personally like the body wash, I think it runs a little smoother. So I’ll put on body wash and then I’ll do each leg for 5 minutes, and I just do like my quad, the side of my leg, and underneath the butt and hamstrings. So I’ll do that 5 minutes per leg while I’m in the shower.

You just run it vertically, horizontally, diagonally; nice and quick, kind of like you’re cleaning clothes on; what are those, washboards? You know, back and forth, back in the day. That’s what she mentions; that’s how it should be, nice and quick. And then you’re smoothing out the fascia, so the fascia runs smooth down the leg instead of in kind of different textures, which creates the dimple.

So she says that you can get rid of cellulite completely from using this tool. So, I was like; f*ck it, yeah, I’ll try it. It was like $90. I’ve been using it now for 2 weeks; and when you start doing it, if you’re anything like me, I bruise incredibly easily. I literally bruise any time I’m doing anything. I always have some sort of bruise on my body; so I’m really bruised. I was going to share a photo on the blog post for this podcast; I was going to share a photo of what the bruising looks like kind of on the side of my leg. But you bruise, and you can bruise pretty badly, especially the first time as your body is kind of getting used to it; or say you’re just really digging into a spot harder. I’m really trying to work on kind of the sides of my legs and under my butt, so I’m pretty bruised there right now. Then I’ll back off the next day until the body kind of heals and then I’ll use it.

So I have been using it for 2 weeks; I did not take before pictures, I kind of forgot. But even if I did take before photos, I don’t think I would share that. I’m not like a person who wants to share; I share a lot of my life and I don’t think I want to share the back of my ass in a bikini or underwear. It’s just not totally my style. It’s a little bit too much for me. So, just speaking from what I’ve seen in the mirror, I’ve definitely seen an improvement. Do I see perfection? No. but, I think of this fascia blaster; because my sister-in-law was like; well, do you have to use it every day then, for the rest of your life? And I think of fascia blasting as just like working out and eating healthy. If you want it, and you want to see results, you have to stick with it. You have to stick with working out, you have to stick with eating healthy on a regular basis. Are you going to skip some days? Sure. You have to live your life, as well. But I see the fascia blasting as not only is it better for recovery for your muscle tissue, as well. I’m just vain and I’m just thinking of cellulite sh*t.

but I definitely see an improvement in the dimples; definitely not to perfection, but I’m going to continue using it. It’s only been 2 weeks, again. So now I’m like; oh, let’s see what I can look like by Costa Rica; what the changes are going to be by Costa Rica, which is in April, because that’s the time I’m going to be in my swim suit. So, I’m going to see how it works. Yeah. Try it out. But I highly recommend it; I think it’s been awesome so far.

Ow, f*ck! I got this, I just got this mole removed today, checking out to see if I have cancer, because I have 400 billion moles on my body, not cute. So I have this one that’s right next to my ear that I didn’t like and wanted removed. She removed it today, sent it off to the lab; but I keep trying to tuck my hair behind my ear and I keep running my finger into it. And she cauterized it; she burned it, so it looks like a cigarette burn into the side of my head. It’s not cute. But I keep running my finger into it; so if I keep yelling “Ow!” that’s why.

But yeah, I recommend the fascia blasting. It’s not like a miracle cure right away; I think you have to continue using it. But I definitely see a difference. I really do. And I wouldn’t just say that; it’s not like I’m just pushing a product; I think it’s awesome. So yeah, that’s been cool. I’ve been trying that out, with Orange Theory, and I’ve been loving it. And I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been doing less CrossFit; but my muscle recovery has been quicker. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been doing less CrossFit, or because I’ve been doing the fascia blasting. I’m not sure what it’s from. But yeah, that’s what I’ve seen so far. So head to the blog if you want to see the bruises; because they’re pretty intense. And there are way more intense ones online. But you can see a ton; I’ll link where you can see a ton of videos, too. Because someone asked me to do a video of how I use it, and I was like “f*ck no.” I’m not leaning over and running this thing over my ass on show; no thanks. No thank you.

5. Juli’s favorite thing in beauty [42:53]

Ok, what else have I been loving? So, if you are a person who has retainers, or like I did; oh, Invisalign, that’s what it’s called. So I did Invisalign; loved it. Highly recommend it to anybody. But if you are a person who has a plastic retainer, or did Invisalign that have those retainers, they get dirty really fast and they’re disgusting. My friend Diane told me about this stuff that’s awesome, so I bought it, and I highly recommend it. It’s so cool if you are a person who is like, I cannot get my dentures or retainer clean. It’s called Stain Away. I just got it on Amazon. Stain Away Plus Professional Strength denture cleanser. And you just add a little bit of this to warm water; cook your retainers away, and just brush them off with your toothbrush, and it cleans them up sparkling clean. It’s awesome; love it; highly recommend it.

Another beauty product I’m loving right now; I’ve talked about these products before. I use Vivant skin care line on my face, and it has made a world of difference on my skin. I f*cking love it; it’s amazing. I highly recommend it. But I just recently got their product called buffing grains, and it’s like a really intense exfoliant. And I’ve been using it on the days that I do like really thick makeup for photos, and I need my skin ultra-smooth all around, buffing grains. But it is also great for getting your makeup off. So say you use a gentle cleanser and it doesn’t get all your makeup off, this is awesome. It doesn’t have any mandelic acid or anything like that; it’s just buffing grains. It’s awesome. Love it.

And that brings me to more face stuff; I recently did my second, what’s it called; second Venus Viva treatment, which is a laser treatment. I did it before, and I think I talked about it maybe on my last podcast, but I did a blog post about it as well. And I love it. It is such an awesome treatment that you can do for your skin. It’s not super painful. The first one hurt really bad, but I think I had better numbing cream the second time around; because the second one didn’t really hurt other than under the eyes and on your lip line, because that sucks. You have so many nerves there. But the Venus Viva gives you this very, just smooth. Your skin looks so smooth and airbrushed; that’s a good word for it. It looks very airbrushed. I haven’t been wearing makeup at all; I haven’t even really been wearing mascara, and my skin just looks so much smoother, and it’s getting rid of a lot of dark spots. It’s been awesome. So if you’re in Denver; I have the best esthetician. I will link her on here.

And then, another thing I’ve been doing regularly; because I have to dye my hair all the time, because I’m naturally blonde, and I don’t want to be naturally blonde. So I dye my hair all the time, and my eyebrows are a lighter color as well, so I have to dye my eyebrows. So I’ve been going to the woman who did my microblading; I go see her to get a wax and to get my eyebrows tinted and darker, and I’ve been loving that because I don’t have to fill much in, because they’re so much darker. Love that. She’s amazing; if you need microblading, or just tinting or waxing, she’s the bomb.

Another thing I did; and then I’m done with beauty stuff. Another thing I did, I talked about on the blog because I loved it. I did lash lifting; which is pretty much perming of your eyelashes. So they kind of put this silicone mold, sticky mold thing, and they comb your eyelashes up, and they’re supposed to perm the bottom of your lashes, so it just turns the lashes up a little bit. And I did it for the first time; loved it. I don’t want to get lash extensions; that’s just not my interest, and I love the lash lifting. It just made your eyelashes look curly all the time. It was awesome.

So I went in for my next appointment, and it was with a different girl, and I thought it was going to be same girl but it was different. She did them, and they were like crazy curl; I mean, completely curled in. she obviously did the whole lash, so I didn’t wear mascara for a couple of days, and then I was going out with my husband on our date night where all hell broke loose, and I couldn’t even wear makeup; eye makeup, because the lashes were so curly that where I put mascara on, they turned back and turned in towards my eye; so fucked up. And I couldn’t even get fake eyelashes on because they were so turned in. f*cking terrible experience. I was like, putting on my makeup, taking it off. Putting it on, taking it off. It was awful.

So I never complain to companies; if I have a bad experience, I’m not a person who will get on f*cking Yelp and complain about sh*t. move on with your day. But I called in to just let her know, since my first experience was awesome, I just let her know what happened. The owner was like, yeah, come in, I’ll try to fix it. So she did like, I don’t know, stripping of the perm. So they’re less permed, they’re slightly turned up. But they’re still just not back to the original. So I’ll have to let them work their way out of the solution, which takes like 5 to 10 weeks. But now I can actually put on makeup. So I highly recommended that, because I loved it, but then my second experience was so sh*tty. So if you are interested in doing that, do your research, and if you like the person, stick with them. I was so bummed about the second person. And then when she was fixing my eyelashes, that person who fucked them up was there. Awkward!! Stop sucking at your one job! Well, whatever. I can wear mascara again. Just, definitely canceling my next appointment. That sh*t is over and done with; I’ll just put on fake eyelashes.

6. Favorite things in food [49:13]

So, anyways. Done with the beauty products. Let’s move on to some food that I’m loving lately. So I did recently post about Vital Farms eggs, and I think eggs are so hard to buy because you don’t know what you’re buying always. And now to finally have a brand that I’ve connected with, the people are awesome. Their farm is out of Austin, but there are a ton of other farms. But, they have eggs and butter, and both the eggs and the butter are so delicious. You can just see the difference in the eggs when you crack them open; they’re orange. They’re such healthy eggs, and they make such a difference in the taste, so I highly recommend Vital Farms if you can find them near you. I know they’re available at Whole Foods; but they’re available at tons of other grocery stores, so just look them up online. But their eggs and their grass-fed butter are amazing. They’re hens are taken care of; they’re pasture raised. They’re not put into a little barn, and say that they’re f*cking, you know, free range. These hens are having a good old time with a ton of space living a happy life, and they’re pooping out happy eggs.

Hey Jackson! So yeah, the eggs are awesome. I stay away from eggs personally, because they make be break out. But it’s the only eggs that I will feed my husband now, and I love the butter. The butter is so tasty. So definitely check them out.

Another thing I’ve been loving is this brand called Malk. They make almond milk; what else? Pecan milk; they might make cashew milk. But they make the best nut milks. They have this maple pecan milk that is to die for. So I’ve been adding it in with this new coffee; this new cold brew coffee that I’ve been loving. I think it’s called Squirrel Coffee; I forget. But this cold brew coffee, I’ve been adding in the maple pecan milk, and then I like to add just a little bit more sugar with some stevia extract, and it is my favorite. But this brand is awesome. Their bottles are super cute, their branding is cool. And then they just use simple ingredients. So if you look at most almond milks, they have so much f*cking weird sh*t in them. It’s so annoying. And Malk doesn’t. it’s like almonds; sea salt. Almonds, maple; I don’t know what it is. Maybe it’s maple syrup. Maple syrup or maple extract; pecans, water. Done. They only have simple sh*t; it’s awesome. They’re such a clean brand. They’re super cool, you guys should totally check them out.

Another thing I’ve been doing; I’ve been working out a lot of times at 9 in the morning recently, and so I’m not ready for a full breakfast, and when I have that full-on breakfast afterwards, I need something in my stomach to hold me over. Especially if I’m doing an Orange Theory workout where you’re working for 55-plus minutes in class; unlike CrossFit where you kind of do something, rest, do something, rest. So I’ve been needing some more food. So I’ve been doing this Maple Hill Greek yogurt. So if you can do dairy, if you have dairy, I love this new Greek yogurt that I’ve been getting. It’s called Maple Hill Greek yogurt. And my friend Diane, from She was telling me how they have a certain process how they do something with their Greek yogurt that makes it much cleaner than other Greek yogurts out there; and you can just taste the difference. It just tastes so good.

So I get the strawberry Maple Hill Greek yogurt, and then I’ve been mixing it. I try to stay away from nuts on a regular basis, but on those days that I have morning workouts and I want a little granola, I’ll either have gluten free granola or I’ve been using this Whole Me; the brand is called Whole Me; they have this lemon chia granola. And they have for purchase these smaller packs. So they’re like, I don’t know, say 100-calorie packs or something. These small little packs; and their lemon chia granola in the Maple Hill strawberry yogurt is so good. Because it’s chewy, it’s super filling; it’s so delicious. So I’ve been adding those two together and loving it. You should; if you can do dairy, you have to try it.

Another thing, I talked about this last time but I’m still obsessed with it and I just went to the store and got it, is the Siete foods. And I’ve been talking about them for years now, because I f*cking love this brand. I love them so much; they make some of the best products you will ever, ever taste. So they brand, they started off as a tortilla company, a grain-free tortilla; and they use almond flour; they also have a coconut and cassava. Their tortillas are amazing; but they just came out with tortilla chips. And their tortilla chips are off the hook.

So I went to Whole Foods yesterday, like I’m usually at Whole Foods almost every day, because I always have to buy little items for food photos or whatever. So I went yesterday to a different Whole Foods, and they didn’t have the chips, and I literally screamed in the store. I screamed f*cking bloody murder! Ok, that’s an exaggeration. But I was f*cking pissed. I even took a picture of it; how mad I was. And then, I went to a Whole Foods today; a different Whole Foods, and they were stocked. So f*ck yeah; I got like 4 bags. Because these tortilla chips; they have lime, just like sea salt; and then nacho. And the lime; I’m so obsessed with lime. It is so good! I love those chips. If you haven’t had them yet, get them. Go to Whole Foods. I’m not sure if they’re available at other stores.

Like, whenever people are like; “Where did you find this?” I’m like, dude, go to f*cking, look up store locator, and find it yourself. I don’t live in the same place as you. Find out where you can find it. F*cking people. Google is your best friend. I have an OK Google just outside my room over here. “Ok, Google, find Siete foods.” I’ve got to say it quietly so she doesn’t hear it. That bitch is always cutting in.

So yeah, Siete foods, loving it. It’s awesome. Ok. I think that’s all the food I’m kind of loving right now. Yeah, I think so.

7. Favorite things in clothing [55:56]

And then, clothing wise. I only have one; no I have two clothing. So I’ve talked about this brand on my blog before because I love them so much. These jeans are available at Nordstrom; I don’t know if they’re available at other places, but as you probably know I’m obsessed with Nordstrom. It’s my favorite place to shop at. They have the best stuff; the best return policy; the best customer service; they’re awesome. But the brand is called Articles of Society and they have jeans; I don’t know if they have other clothes. But they have jeans, and I love their jeans. They’re usually $54 to 60. They’re not crazy expensive, and they fit; if you have more muscular or larger legs, they stretch really well. They don’t give you that huge gap in the waist; I love them. I linked a couple on my Instagram; a couple of these pairs of jeans. I think one pair was $54. And they are by far my favorite jeans; I love them, I’m obsessed with them. Articles of Society. If you want affordable jeans that fit you, try these out. Try them out.

I usually size down. I usually wear a size 27 in a pair of jeans, and I size down to a 26 in these, so keep that in mind. They are amazing. Yeah, that’s what’s happening.

A second thing I love; I just got my first pair of Jeffery Campbell boots, and I think I shared them on Instagram this week. They’re velvet. I love them. They’re awesome. They are so comfortable, and I have a hard time wearing booties, or anything that’s a heel, for a very long amount of time, and these are amazing. Love their shoes; I want to buy more. They’re more on the pricy side, so it’s not a ton of shoes that I’ll invest in, but they’re worth every penny. So yeah. My voice is going and going as this hour-long f*cking podcast goes on. But yeah, Jeffery Campbell, and the Articles of Society jeans. Loving! Loving.

8. Weekly PaleOMG blog recap [58.02]

So those are all my favorite things right now. That’s all I have; I think that’s all I have for you. I did want to give a little recap of what’s going on at If you’re a person who doesn’t follow my blog; you totes should, because that’s where all the sh*t is happening. Every Monday I post my weekly workouts, so what workouts I did. My Orange Theory summaries, and kind of scores, and I talk about on-sale fitness apparel, I give you a free travel workout, and then I just kind of talk about some motivational stuff, if you’re a motivational kind of gal; kind of guy. I talk about that.

And then this week on the blog, I shared this; let’s see what it’s called. Sticky and Crispy Orange Sriracha Chicken bowls. So every week on my blog I share new recipes, so that was the one recipe I shared. The second recipe is mocha hazelnut energy balls. So you get a chicken rice bowl recipe with cauliflower rice that’s like this crispy chicken with an orange glaze on top; so f*cking good. And then mocha hazelnut energy balls that are like the best little treat, and I’ve been having those at the end of the night, and they’re all gone and I’m really depressed. So those are the two things I did.

This week I also talked about collagen and protein powder that I’m loving. I’ve been adding collagen; a reader mentioned to me that she’s been adding collagen to her coffee every morning, and I’ve had collagen around the house for a long time, but I’ve never took it on a regular basis, because I only added it to protein shakes and I don’t drink many protein shakes per week. Maybe one; maybe two if I’m being crazy. But yeah, I’ve been adding collagen to my coffee every morning, and then to some sort of drink later on in the day, just trying to get about two tablespoons; one to two tablespoons in. and my nails have been growing a ton more. I can’t tell if other things are growing yet; your hair is supposed to be stronger and grow longer. So I’m mostly taking it for skin; so I don’t have old skin as I age; for nails, and for hair. And yeah, so I talk about my favorite collagen, protein powder. Jeeze, I’m losing it. I’m going guys. I’m dying.

So I talk about those; the collagen and protein power. And then I do an Instagram roundup of all the outfits I wore this past week. So I have a big; I don’t know, there are probably like 15 outfits in this post. So you should totally go to, I have a ton of stuff on there. And then you can find the links to all the products that I talked about in this post, and links to my esthetician if you’re in Colorado or my microblading whoever else.

Oh, I’m so excited, because I’m going to try; the esthetician just made me think of it. I’m going to try, in probably two months, a vampire facial. They; I don’t know, microneedle your face, and then take the blood, and mix it, and put it back on your face or something. I don’t know. I’m going to try it out, and do photos of that, and talk about that experience. I love trying new facial sh*t; it’s so much fun. And then bringing it back to you guys.

So yeah, that’s what’s happening on the blog this week. Head over there. And as always, if you’re awesome and you enjoy this podcast, and you’re not too annoyed with the echoing that I can’t figure out, or the random music that plays at random times; you know. If you’re cool with all of that, and you want to rate and review this podcast in a positive review; because you know, there’s enough negativity in this world right now, we don’t need to spread more of it. Then head over to iTunes; it’s awesome if you rate, review, and subscribe. I don’t know what it does, but I think it’s important. So if you could do that, that would be fantastic.

And I hope you guys enjoy the rest of your week. The rest of your weekend, wherever you are while you’re listening to this. I hope you have an awesome time. I hope you do cool-ass sh*t. my favorite thing about this week was probably making a strawberry swirl shortbread cookie ice cream, which I’ll be sharing on the blog next week. So I want you to think about, what was the best thing of your week, and talk about it, and remember that great things come from thinking great things. I don’t know; that was some motivational bullshit that didn’t work out.

Anyways. Thanks for coming by today, guys. Thanks for sitting through everything. I hope I didn’t get you too hot and bothered with my 50 Shades Darker talk; but you should go out and see it with your husband or wife or whoever you’re dating. Because it’s a good time. With your girlfriends is fun, but you know, not as cute.

So anyways; go do cool stuff, be awesome, keep doing cool sh*t in this world; spread the positivity guys. I will see you next week. Next week is going to be listener questions, so if you want to head to the blog on Monday, for my weekly workouts post, I’m going to ask what questions you have and you can leave your questions there. I’ll probably ask on Instagram as well, but feel free to ask me a question anywhere and I’ll write it down to make sure it gets answered. So we’ll have random listener questions next week.

Keep being awesome, keep doing sh*t. keep kicking ass, keep eating healthy, keep working out. Trying Eating Evolved, and trying out Aaptiv, because those are sponsors this week that are awesome. Love you guys! See you later. XOXO. Bye-bye.

99 episodes available. A new episode about every 7 days averaging 68 mins duration .