Why We Blame / Spartan MIND 049


Manage episode 238248230 series 61324
By Discovered by Player FM and our community — copyright is owned by the publisher, not Player FM, and audio streamed directly from their servers.

We all blame. Your spouse gets an earful when you forgot your kids lunchbox, the customer service agent becomes the punching bag when you accidentally deleted your photos from your iPhone, or your supervisee gets a talking to when you forgot to check your schedule. Blaming is never really a useful tactic but we do it because we struggle with difficult feelings. So we offload them. Feelings of disappointment, especially in yourself, can spawn lots of blaming because we struggle to tolerate that feeling. Reminding yourself that even painful feelings can be tolerated and worked through can help you move away from blaming behaviors.


  • Understand and remind yourself that blaming is one tactic that we use to offload difficult and painful feelings.
  • Build up some distress tolerance around those feelings by sitting when them, breathing, and using positive affirmations.


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Production Team: Heather Knox, Knox Creative; Marion Abrams, Madmotion, llc.

Host: Dr. Lara Pence

Synopsis: Dr. Lara Pence

© 2019 Spartan

442 episodes available. A new episode about every day averaging 12 mins duration .