Episode 063 - What is Emotional Intelligence?

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By Steve Valentine and Bernie Espinosa, Steve Valentine, and Bernie Espinosa. Discovered by Player FM and our community — copyright is owned by the publisher, not Player FM, and audio is streamed directly from their servers. Hit the Subscribe button to track updates in Player FM, or paste the feed URL into other podcast apps.

What is Emotional Intelligence? That’s the subject of this week’s episode, and it’s a subject that Bernie is very passionate about. So, what is it, and how does it relate to our business of Real Estate? It’s the ability to perceive, reason, understand, and manage emotions of others in our day to day lives. For agents, being emotionally intelligent can mean the difference between working with clients on a purely transactional basis or understanding what they’re looking for on an emotional level and coming up with those outside the box solutions that working in everyone’s interests.

We are in a people focused industry, and the types of transactions we deal with as real estate agents can be very emotionally charged. When speaking with our clients about what our clients are looking for in a forever home, we can get any kind of response ranging from cold logic to emotional milestones. Being emotionally intelligent means more than identifying with a person’s feelings in the moment, it’s about understanding what’s behind the way a client responds to our questions. There are times to empathize with stories of our own, or solutions to the problems brought up, and then there are times when listening is the best course. Being able to build the trust with your clients that you are working in their best interests and working to find solutions to the problems they may or may not have vocalized can be important to your success as an agent.

“Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand what's happening with your feelings at a given moment in time and not acting in them but leveraging that to really understand what's happening within whoever you're interacting with.” - Bernie

“When we get into our business right there, that’s where a lot of people come up short. They're not listening to the full conversation because they're too busy trying to regurgitate their next response, rather than taking a pause to give themselves some time to truly respond.” – Steve

“That's how you connect with other humans is to recognize that just below the surface, there could be things that are going on there that may or may not represent what they're sharing with you. It takes time to build a rapport, to get them to share even more and to be empathetic.” – Bernie

“One thing that I've learned is learning to sit back and be patient and listen and let people talk. Too many times in the sales world that we both live in, we're self absorbed, right? So, we tend to ask some questions, they might give a small response and then we go back into what we're going to do for them and try to fit them into that, rather than answering a question with a question and getting them to move in that direction organically.” – Steve

Hey you! You’re a long-time listener, time to be a first-time caller! Have a question or topic you’d like us to cover? Drop a line to our DM’s at:

Steve’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stevedvalentine/

Bernie’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bernzpix/

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84 episodes