Couples argue about a fairly narrow range of issues, including intimacy, control, habits and of course money. Avoiding toxic or nuclear arguments is essential to a solid relationship. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about ways couples can avoid the pitfalls that can derail them and how to take the toxicity out of financial discussions. For a …

In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the fine art of flirtation. Why we do it, what it means and how to flirt without crossing a line into cheating. For a full transcript and more, click here: LL31-Why Men and Women FlirtBy Doug Weiss & Alvean Lyons

A lot of books have been written about the differences between men and women–but often they offer very litte useful insight where it matters most–in relationship. In this episode, Alvean and Doug take on this time worn topic with some fresh insights about how men and women think, react and respond to one another. For a full transcript, click here:L…

Is fighting normal–dos it help heal or break relationships? Is there such a thing as healthy quarrellng? Answers to these and related questions in this episode from Alvean and Doug. For a complete transcript, click here:LL29-Why Do Couples Quarrel?By Doug Weiss & Alvean Lyons

We read about heartbreak, and may have suffered it ourselves. There is medical evidence that heartbreak can lead to poor health, even death, but is the opposite also true, can love heal? In this episode Alvean and Doug, joined by a special guest discuss the facts and the truth about the healing power of Love. For a full transcript of this episode, …

Songs have been written about it –it’s not an uncommon question. What to do when you find yourself attracted to two different people at the same time. How do you resolve this dilemma? In this episode, Alvean and Doug offer their life experience and wisdom on the subject and suggest some paths to resolution. For more, and a full transcript, click he…

Some people are the main character of every scene in their lives. It is all about them and the rest of us are just supporting characters in their play. In this episode, Alvean and Doug offer their thoughts on how best to navigate should you find yourself in the presence of someone with these characteristics. For a complete trascript of the episode,…

Is it possible to find happiness without being in a relationship? For some, being alone is a comfort, a retreat into a contemplative life that starts by being in love with oneself. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss those aspects of being alone that are sweetened for individuals who find themselves in this state of being or choose to remain s…

Controlling behavior is not an uncommon dynamic between couples. It can be overt or more often unrecognized but the struggle for autonomy contends with the desire to please and the need for clear boundaries that respect both party’s rights. Alvean and Doug take on this fraught topic in thsi episode and offer some counsel on how to avoid finding you…

You’ve probably heard it, maybe even believe that opposites are attracted to one another. But do they make for a good relationship? In the episode, Alvean and Doug explore the truth and fiction behind the saying and the true path to compatibility. For a full transcript of the episode, click here:LL23-Do Opposites Attract…

The green eyed monster, jealousy, is at the heart of too many failed relationships. It generally proceeds from a lack of trust or a violation of the emotional investment one partner has made in the other. Whatever the underlying cause, jealousy is a difficult monster to tame. To learn how, listen to Alvean and Doug discuss the subject in this episo…

Something happened and you and your ex parted ways. As is often the case, you both may have regret and after a time drift back into each other's orbits. Can love be renewed, can ex's reunite successfully? To find out what Alvean and Doug have to say, listen to this episode and read the transcript here:LL21-Getting Back with Your Ex…

Break ups happen and we hope they can be navigated gracefully even though both parties may experience pain and a sense of loss. But what happens when your ex won't let go, and pain becomes anger and vindictive behavior? In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about how survive such an experience and what causes it. For a full transcript of the episod…

There are three ingredients for a successful and loving relationship: Honesty, Trust, and Empathy. In this episode, Alvaen and Doug discuss empathy--what it is and isn't and why it is such an important building block in emotional maturity and life. For a full transcript, click here: LL19-Empathy is a Lost Virtue…

Too often our life experiences harden us and create boundaries that prevent us from having a fulfilling relationship. In this episode, Alvaen and Doug discuss the power of opening ourselves to others, being vulnerable to pain or hurt but also open to true love and deep emotional bonds. For a full transcript of the episode, click here: LL18-Vulnerab…

In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about life's priorities. How do we make sense of all the competing demands on our attention, time and affection? Is there a majoc formula for deciding what reall matters? For more and a complete transcript, click here: LL17By Doug Weiss & Alvean Lyons

No one wishes to be in emotional pain but it happens to most of us at some point. While it may not seem so at the time, pain can bring with it a healing power--wisdom--that helps us avoid the circumstances that led to our hurt in the first place. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about how we confront ourselves and learn to separate the pain fr…

The easiest person to deceive is ourselves. Whether out of a misplaced sense of self protection, and inability to face reality, or avoid pain, we are accomplished liars when it comes to certain parts of our life. It is, however, extremely unhealthy and in the end self destructive. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the ways in which we can le…

It has happened to most of at least once, our hearts have been broken in the wake of a breakup, infidelity, or another violation of the all important trust partners must have in one another. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about self nurture--the tools that are available to us to heal our hurt and rebuild our sense of self esteem and wholenes…

Last week Alvean and Doug talked about the fallout from infidelity and the path to rapproachment. In this episode they talk about the ways in which couples can prevent infidelity in the first place. Alvean illustrates the dry grass principle that sets up the environment in which emotional estrangement provides a fertile atmosphere for cheating. For…

It is one of the most devastating things that can happen in a relationship--when one partner is unfaithful. While most often this violation of trust results in an end to the relationship, or a divorce it is possible to rebuild the foundations if both partners are committed to the long and transparent journey. Alvean and Doug take on this difficult …

In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the best relationship advice they received over the years. For a full transcript, click here: LL11By Doug Weiss & Alvean Lyons

Realtionships can be hard enough without the challenges of navigating two different cultures. They can also be fantastic and rewarding--but that requires emotional insight, tact, and patience to achieve. In this episode, Alvean and Doug offer some thoughts on cross cultural relationships and how to cultivate the right frame of mind for the couple a…

One of the trickier challenges couples face that have children from a prior relationship is when and how to blend their families together. In this episode, Alvean and Doug explore those challenges and offer some helpful guidance to avoid the emotional and logistical ripples; For a full transcript, click here: LL09…

Money is a very common issue that can cause friction in a relationship. While there are many different ways in which the subject can be fraught--in this episode Alvean and Doug explore the nuances when the traditional 'breadwinner' role is reversed and the woman earns more than the man. For more and a full transcript, click here:LL08…

Have you ever wondered if perhaps the reason you haven't found mr or ms right has more to do with you than you think? If so this episode is for you. Alvean and Doug talk about ways some people sabotage themselves or create barriers that prevent them from building a loving relationship. For more and a complete transcript, click here: LL07…

In this episode Alvean and Doug take on the subject of breakups. There is no such thing as a good breakup but there are better ways to say goodbye. Whether you are the one saying goodbye or receiving such news learn how to put your feelings in perspective and rise above the hurt. For a full transcript click here: LL06…

Have you ever wondered if there is a special someone made just for you? Does God run a dating service or are we attracted to certain people based on subtle patters that inform our lives? In this episode, Alvean and Doug explore the reality of finding a mate and the stories we tell ourselves about how and why. For a full transcript, click here: LL05…

How do you know if she or he is the one? Is this true love or something else? Discovering the boundaries and qiualities of your relationship requires patience, insight and an open heart. Alvean and Doug offer some strategies for answering the question, what's real in this episode. For more, click here: LL04…

The full title of this episode is Loving Relationships expand our hearts. Nothing could be more true. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk from their hearts about their own experiences--how we can find a larger frame for our emotions and our care by building enduring relationships in life. For a full transcript, click here:LL03…

Who we choose as our role models speaks volumes about them and about us. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about their own experience and offer counsel on our choices. A full transcript can be found here: LL02By Doug Weiss & Alvean Lyons

Surely one of the most difficult traits to surmount is a passive/aggressive personality. Relationships require trust and honest communication to flourish. A passive aggressive partner presents a difficult challenge because avoidance is coupled with trust violating aggression. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss this trait and offer insights as…

Among the many forces which can strengthen or torpedo a relationship, social media looms large as a potentially dynamic or destructive mechanism. In this episode, Alvean and Doug explore the ways in which social media can act as an amplifier or as a censor--instantiating not only your own feelings but those of others around you. For a full transcri…

It's been said that parenthood is the last of the unskilled occupations. In truth, we are almost always unprepared for parenthood and the many changes it makes in the way we live, and in our relationships. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss many of this issues and help newly expecting parents or even those who are just thinking about having c…

That important moment where one of you moves in with the other can be a wonderful next step in your relationship or lead to difficulties down the road--even your eventual break up. Knowing how and when to make that move is critical. In this episode, Alvean and Doug explore the ways you can ensure a smooth transition and how to avoid the pitfalls of…

Perhaps you have heard about love languages before. In case you haven't it is a way of characterizing the ways in which we express our feelings for another and how they show theirs to us. Are you someone that delights in doing nice things for your SO, or do you prefer tangible gifts? Alvean and Doug talk about the various ways in which we express o…

Alvean and Doug take on a difficult topic--identifying traits that may make you an enabler of others' bad behaviors or habits. It can be hard to tell the difference between tolerating and enabling, between acceptance and furtherance. For more about this episode, click here: 67-Are you an Enabler?By Doug Weiss & Alvean Lyons

Most of us have a preconceived idea of what kind of person would be our ideal mate--but often we settle for someone quite different. Are our projections unrealistic or do we find that what we thought might be essential isn't really that important? To find answers to these and other questions about realtionships listen to this episode of LoveLife or…

In this episode, Alvean and Doug explore the meaning of true friendship. Are friends always honest with one another, and, if so, how does one navigate hurt feelings? Do friends allow themselves to get involved in other relationships? Are friends allowed to be jealous? Answers to these and other questions can be found in this transcript: LL61-Are yo…

In this frank episode, Alvean and Doug talk about intimacy, what it is, how to achieve it and how to avoid the mis-steps that can lead to heartbreak. For a complete transcript, click here: LL60-What is IntimacyBy Doug Weiss & Alvean Lyons

For those who have experienced a true and lasting love, what are the lessons from which we can all learn? Alvean and Doug talk about their own experience and those of listeners in this moving episode. For a full transcript, click here: LL59-What has true love taught you?By Doug Weiss & Alvean Lyons

Folk wisdom suggests that once you pass a certain age marriage becomes less and less realistic. But folk wisdom isn't always true and what once may have been the case is no longer. Alvean and Doug talk about age as a factor in marriage including age differences and how best to address them. For more, and a full transcript, click here:LL58-Is there …

Whatever your age there is a very good possibility that you have accumulated a few regrets, things done or left undone that you wish you could change. Left unchecked those regrets can become a corrosive force in your life and in your relationships. Alvean and Doug talk frankly about their own challenges and offer advice on how to move forward in an…

When two people begin a relationship that involves children from a prior marriage or partnership things can easily become highly charged. Co-parenting is a frequently cited challenge for new couples and unless it is carefully navigated can bring about heartbreaking consequences for all. Alvean and Doug take on this difficult subject in this episode…

Regardless of your age today, as you go through your life change is inevitable. Sometimes it is for the better and sometimes not. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about life's stages and phases and how they can alter one's perspective on life itself and on those you care for. For a full transcript, click here: LL55-How has your perspective cha…

In this episode, Alvean and Doug take on a fraught subject, how to navigate a relationship when there is a 3rd party involved. It could be an ex, a sibling or family member, even a child from an earlier marriage. Whoever that person is, there is a very good chance things won't end well, unless of course both partners work through the situation with…

In contrast to women who tend to be more emotionally accessible, men can appear to be opaque or unfeeling. The truth is that though they may not say what they are feeling most men are not immune to feelings. In this episode, Alvean and Doug explore the hidden dimension of masculine emotional life and off some insights into how best to create an ope…

It's a phrase you may have heard from friends or even wondered yourself, are there any good men/women out there? The answer is unquestionably yes but you may be creating obstacles to finding them. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about some of the self defeating behaviors that get in our way from time to time and cause us to feel as if everyth…

It is indeed the hardest thing to do, even and especially if there are good reasons to do so. Some try ghosting, or manufactured arguments as a way to unwind a relationship but both approaches violate trust--the essence of any good relationship in the first place. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about ways in which you can exit a relationship…

The birth of your firstborn can be a wonderful blessing but it also changes many dynamics in a relationship. Navigating the early days of parenthood to say nothing of the challenges to your health, sleep, and romantic life can add an unwelcome burden. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the real world implications and offer some strategies for…