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Leaderhood & Parentship

Shane Wallace & Morgan Berna

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Leaderhood & Parentship is brought to you by CultureSmith Inc. - the industry leader in workplace emotional intelligence (EQ) and leadership training. On each episode, we dive into the most recent and relevant issues facing leaders based on the hundreds of Executive Coaching calls we facilitate each month. We then shift gears and show how the same evidence-based approaches to issues of EQ in the workplace can applied at home.
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#71 - Welcome back! This week we’re talking about the science of happiness. First, we banter about marketing trends and how they relate to Shane’s work with leaders. Then, we dive into what the “science” of happiness is. Can happiness really be measured? Is it what we think it is? What does it mean for those of us who don’t experience it deeply? An…
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#70 - In most episodes Shane will reference books that have transformed the way he thinks and how CultureSmith operates. For this episode, we break down the 3 most transformational books he’s ever read. With each book he shares the key points that are important for leaders and parents, anything he disagrees with, and what moment sticks with him. Sh…
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#69 - A lack of motivation, increased negativity about the self and others, a lack of pride in work… These are all common symptoms of burnout that we’ve normalized in today’s society. And, we don’t need to. In this episode, Shane breaks down what burnout is, which industries it shows up most in, how leaders can determine if an employee is facing bu…
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#68 - What does it cost you to be kind? Sometimes, that cost is giving up the chance to be cruel. In this episode, Shane breaks down what cruelty is and why we choose to engage in the behaviour. Shane explains the rationalizing behind cruelty, how each Cognitive Colour experiences cruelty, and what leaders get wrong about it. Then, we flip it to th…
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#67 - What does it cost you to be kind? No, really. There is a cost associated with kindness that often we aren’t willing to pay. Why? That’s the focus of this episode. Shane first breaks down the defining components of kindness. Then, we explore why kindness is important, how it is viewed in both neuroscience and psychology, and common misconcepti…
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#66 - 93% of human communication is non-verbal. In a world where we increasingly work online, almost 100% of communication now doesn’t work for us. We can’t read body language or tone over messaging apps and people love to lean on workplace cliches. Intentional communication is more important than ever. In this episode, Shane breaks down CultureSmi…
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#65 - When’s the last time you received praise for something and it really made you feel a surge of pride? We’re guessing it’s less often than you’d think. Most of us never learned how to use praise effectively, making it feel more like a “nice to have” than an effective leadership strategy. But, the importance of praise should not be discounted. I…
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#64 - Welcome back, and happy new year! For our first episode of 2024, we’re diving into the anatomy of the Cognitive Colours. What needed to happen for you to become your specific behavioural profile (both good and bad)? Shane starts by explaining why he’s hesitated about sharing this information; then, we explore what this topic offers for listen…
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#63 - Over this past year there were 6 key occasions that changed the way Shane and CultureSmith Inc. framed coaching. Inspired by clients, Shane’s own experiences, and stories, this episode breaks down these 6 “aha” moments in easy to understand terms for quick application. From incorporating sensory language, to using storytelling as an accountab…
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#62 - We kick off this week’s episode with a bit of an existential discussion around the use of AI at work and ways it might be able to help teams grow their comfort with conflict. Then, Shane explains the goal of this episode and how it is different from our past episodes about conflict. In this episode, we discuss the stages of conflict. Shane ex…
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#61 - If you’ve been listening for some time, you’ve likely heard Shane mention the enormous impact a 360 review had on his life and career. But, what we haven’t discussed is how these reviews are performed. This episode breaks that process down. First, we talk about a negative podcast review we got (this review was removed by the poster before thi…
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#60 - If you are a manager looking to make the transition to a leader, or a company looking to add current managers to your leadership team, this episode is for you. Recently, CultureSmith Inc. has seen an increasing need for companies to shift their managers into leadership positions. But, he cautions against only positioning this change as a posi…
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#59 - There’s this perception that anyone who wants to be a leader needs to be a manager. Or that managers naturally will become leaders. In this episode, Shane breaks down the reality of these two distinct roles and why they don’t exist on a linear trajectory. Shane explains the method CultureSmith Inc. uses to identify leadership and management t…
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#58 - How do you know when a relationship needs repair? And if it does, what can you even do to fix things? In this episode, Shane walks through the 3 phases of relationship repairs. He begins by explaining the “toxic triangle” and how it is used to create an imbalance in power. Then, he explains the role it plays in relationships and quickly runs …
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#57 - Previously, we talked about the different stages of organizational change. This time, we’re taking a deep dive into the 6 why's leaders need to address with each team member in order for change to happen effectively. Shane explains what the 6 whys are and how to address each one with team members, how our Cognitive Colours factor-in. Then, we…
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#56 - Recently, we talked about psychological safety and the various ways it shows up in the workplace. What we haven’t broken down yet is a tangible way to look at the different levels of safety present at your organization or home. In this episode, Shane breaks down the 4 levels of psychological safety: individual, team, organization, and leader.…
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#55 - The Five Dysfunctions of a Team is a business book written by consultant and speaker, Patrick Lencioni. In it, he breaks down 5 issues teams face: absence of trust, fear of conflict, lack of commitment, avoidance of accountability, and inattention to results. CultureSmith follows a similar structure where conflict, accountability, and commitm…
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#54 - How do you motivate your team? Do you lead with rewards and punishment, or use something unique based on people’s individual needs? If you’re unsure how to do the latter, this episode is for you. We kick off this episode with a discussion around AI and emotional intelligence, then we dive right into our main topic; motivation. Shane shares th…
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#53 - Does the word “confrontation” evoke some feelings in you? Maybe negative ones? A confrontation doesn’t need to be a negative thing, but so many people avoid them because they don’t know how to have them effectively. In this episode, we’re breaking down the stereotypes and misinformation about confrontations. We discuss what a confrontation ac…
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#52 - The term “psychological safety” has been picking up popularity online, so in this episode we’re revisiting the concept for a second time and diving into nuances we didn’t discuss on our first episode. First, Shane breaks down what psychological safety is and why the term itself is a bit of a misnomer. Then, we explain why psychologically safe…
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#51 - Has there been more anger in the world over the past few years? How about in the workplace? In a way, we’ve lost practice with how to interact with each other in space, and this is becoming increasingly apparent as companies continue to roll out return-to-office plans. In this episode, we start off by explaining the definition of anger. We th…
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#50 - For our 50th episode, we’re talking all about defensiveness. First, we chat about what it has been like to create and share 50 episodes of Leaderhood & Parentship. Then, we deep dive into a conversation about defensiveness, touching on: what it is, what causes it, how our Cognitive Colour affects how we experience it, some dos and don’ts for …
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#49 - Do you feel like there has been an increase in unreasonable asks at work? It’s likely coming from entitlement – but before you take that term and run with it, it’s important to understand what entitlement actually is. In the first 10-minutes of this episode, Shane debunks the common misunderstandings about entitlement. Then, we discuss what e…
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#48 - CultureSmith Inc. is on a crusade to eliminate loneliness in the workplace. This year, the Surgeon General in the U.S. announced that we are experiencing an epidemic of loneliness. This is the first time an emotion has been declared at the heart of a health crisis. Why? It turns out experiencing loneliness at a high level can have profound, p…
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#47 - What does the future of work look like? For decades we have operated in rules-based organization cultures. On paper, they look good. Everyone knows their role and what will happen if they don’t do it properly. However, as we move into a world where employees increasingly have choice around where they work and who they work for, can we expect …
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#46 - The Red colour profile makes up only 18% of the general population, but a disproportionate amount of leaders. Motivated and driven, Reds are no strangers to rising quickly in the ranks at work. However, when emotional intelligence training isn’t present, Reds can come across as harsh and strict. In this episode we touch on the assets and liab…
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#45 - Conscientious. Rule abiding. Quiet. Reflective. These are some of the qualities that make people with Blue as their Cognitive Colour unique. In this episode, we’re breaking down exactly what it means to be Blue, the assets and liabilities of the colour profile, and things Shane has learned from having a Blue business partner and a Blue wife. …
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#44 - This week we’re shining a light on everyone’s favourite co-worker: Green. People with Green as their Cognitive Colour tend to be team-oriented, genuine, loyal, and love to do work in service of others. In this episode, Shane breaks down the common traits a Green will have in the workplace and what CultureSmith is doing to help bring more Gree…
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#43 - Would you describe yourself as go-with-the-flow, visionary, easygoing, creative, and maybe a little petty? It’s possible you’re a Yellow. This episode marks the start of a 4-part series where Shane deep dives into the characteristics and behaviours of each of the four cognitive colours; Yellow, Green, Blue, and Red. Here, learn what makes a Y…
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#42 - Do you find yourself asking people to take accountability at work? Instead, the subtle shift to helping someone account for their choices can have a massive impact. In this episode, Shane breaks down the important of framing accountability from a choice-centric lens and proven strategies to help team members account for their choices. We also…
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#41 - In our most vulnerable episode yet… Just kidding, but we are taking a deep dive into the topic of vulnerability today and how it forms half of the equation needed to produce trust. We start off with an explanation of what vulnerability actually is and then explore how it can be used to strengthen teams. Morgan shares her experience with vulne…
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#40 - What does a psychologically safe workplace look like? How can you encourage your team to own their mistakes? What can you do to help your children make good decisions? For the second part of our culture series, Shane explores the 5 remaining steps in CultureSmith’s 9-part culture framework: Psychological safety, belonging, power and influence…
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#39 - Is there such a thing as a “bad” workplace culture? How can you bring your team together to work toward a shared future? What role do leaders play in building culture? In this 2-part series, Shane breaks down the 9 step framework CultureSmith uses to “smith” a culture. First, Shane explains what a culture actually is (a lot of us get this wro…
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#38 - What do we really mean when we say someone is “being emotional?” Why were so many of us taught to “not bring our emotions to work?” Do these views of emotions really serve us and our workplaces? In this episode, Shane and Morgan discuss emotions; from the scientific reason for them, down to the different ways we can use them as leaders to bet…
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#37 - Are you looking to unlock a more deeply engaged and attentive team? Maybe you feel like you are losing energy switching between all the tasks on your plate? There is a better way. This week, Shane is sharing the secret to moving out of an energy-draining focused state into an energy-replenishing flow state as we discuss the science behind “at…
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#36 - Does your company have a formal mentorship program? It’s easier to set up than you’d think, and is one of the best ways to boost safety in your team. In this episode, Shane walks through the benefits of mentorship, the differentiators between mentors and leaders, and how he recommends starting a mentorship program. We then flip it to the home…
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#35 - This week is a very special episode because we are bringing on our first ever guest, Averie (one of Shane’s daughters!). We start out with Shane answering questions about leadership development from the workplace lens, and then flip to Averie’s thoughts around leadership development for teens. We discuss the importance of having a formal lead…
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#34 - Do you wish you could see problems in a different way instead of dwelling on them? Or help your team more when they’re feeling stuck in a challenge? There’s a phenomenal strategy you can use to do this, it’s called “reframing.” Today, we walk through what reframing is, how it differs from “toxic positivity,” the different workplace scenarios …
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#33 - Conflict – most of us say we don’t like it, but are we wrong? Is conflict actually the key to building stronger, more emotionally intelligent teams? We would argue yes. In this episode, Shane breaks down the key distinction between task and relationship based conflicts, and explores the different ways we use both at home and at work. Shane ou…
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#32 - Why does it bother us so much when we aren’t understood? In this episode, we explore the philosophy and science behind effective communication. Shane discusses how his background in philosophy informs CultureSmith’s work, why understanding communication is crucial for leaders, and how our Cognitive Colour informs how we encode and decode mess…
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#31 - Imposter syndrome – we’ve all heard the term, but what does it actually mean? In this episode, we discuss the key differences between imposter syndrome and insecurity. Shane shares the 5 types of imposter syndrome, how our Cognitive Colours impact our experience with imposter syndrome, and how to overcome it. Plus, we explore the different wa…
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#30 - Change is hard, whether it’s at work or at home. That’s why today we’re devoting this entire episode to discussing change and ways we can make it less painful for all involved. Shane explains the 5 Laws of Organizational Change, how our Cognitive Colours impact how we respond to change, and the simple reason why change often feels so painful.…
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#29 - As a leader, you need your team to buy into various company needs daily. So, how do you help employees see the value in their work without resorting to manipulation or coercion? Enter the 6 principles of influence. In this episode, Shane explains the 6 steps leaders can take to influence (persuade) their team. This method helps employees feel…
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#28 - Imagine going into work, knowing your projects align with your personal goals, and that your boss is actively working to help you grow and feel engaged every day. That’s what it feels like for employees with a transformational leader. The good news? This leadership style can be learned. Today, we break down the 12 steps to become a transforma…
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#27 - Do you ever wonder if your team is really hearing what you’re saying? It might be time to try dynamic speaking. This technique, named by CultureSmith Inc., pairs with active listening to create clearer, more effective discussions. Shane explains what the technique is, how each Cognitive Colour would use dynamic speaking, and how this benefits…
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#26 - Have you heard the term “active listening?” It’s likely you have – but do you actually know why it’s worth practicing? It turns out, active listening closely relates to emotional intelligence and having more effective conversations at work. In this episode, we explore what active listening is, the struggle each Cognitive Colour will have prac…
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#25 - In our most vulnerable episode to date, Shane walks us through his entire daily routine from start to finish. Shane starts off explaining why every leader should care about emotional intelligence and transformational leadership before taking us along with him through a typical work day. We discuss grounded empathy, emotional check-ins, steps …
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#24 - Do excuses get under your skin? You're not alone. Today, we'll dive into both why we dislike hearing excuses and why we make them in the first place. We explore the difference between and excuse and a lie, how our behavioural colours play a role in making and responding to them, the four types of excuses, and how this applies at home. This ep…
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#23 - After releasing 20 episodes, we’ve gotten a lot of great questions from listeners. Today, in this dedicated Q&A, we’ve rounded up the top questions from leaders, employees, and parents. We talk about the importance of leading with curiosity, the myth that growing EQ makes you happy, how to be a better “team player,” if leaders should accept r…
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#22 - Today, we’re taking a look at relationships. The more people we work with, the more complex the relationships in our lives become – and that can lead to conflict, confusion, and heightened emotions. In this candid conversation, we explore what a relationship really is, why having friends at work matters, the 5 dimensions of any relationship, …
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