Kyle and Sara Wester are Licensed Professional Counselors (LPCs) with over 20 years experience working with children and teenagers in Tulsa, Oklahoma.Their podcast will help you parent from a place of freedom, love, and courage. Their passion is to help you uncover areas of fear and shame in your parenting and inspire you to empower your children to become healthy adults.They use the latest research in neuroscience coupled with their own experience raising 3 children.
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Code4Couples is the premiere podcast for Law Enforcement relationships hosted by Cyndi Doyle, author of Hold the Line: The Essential Guide to Protecting Your Law Enforcement Relationship, psychotherapist, and a law enforcement spouse working to educate officers and spouse on the impact of law enforcement on their relationship for them to counter the impact and create connected and resilient relationships. She is the author and creator of Hold the Line products including a train the trainer p ...
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Counseling Tips For Pastors And Ministry Leaders - Practical Help From Christian Counselors
iHope Christian Care And Counseling with Jessica Hayes, LPC, LMFT
Do you want to care for the people in your ministry more effectively? This podcast will equip you to do exactly that. The reality of Christian ministry is that it can be exhausting, overwhelming, and lonely. This is certainly true for pastors, but it is also true for all Christians in ministry! And every Christian has a ministry of some kind. From youth leaders to Bible study leaders to loving your next-door neighbor, we are all in ministry to the people around us. And those people are hurti ...
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Let’s stop living a full time life with half-ass energy and intentions. There’s so much more to who you are in this one incredible life that you get to live. I’m a certified personal trainer and mental health counselor.After having my 7th child, I decided to thread together my two passions: the mind and the body. I want to share my journey with you. We are truly incredible humans. Remembering our worth and sharing our stories will shine the light of hope for all to see. My light sparked when ...
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Parenting Can Be Sooo Overwhelming! How Can We Lighten the Mental Load? (Ep 121)
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In Episode 121, Kyle and Sara, LPC’s, interview JoAnn Crohn from the popular No Guilt Mom podcast. We discuss how overwhelming being a parent is most of the time, especially for moms. She shares with us what “mental load” is and how moms and dads can work together to help lighten the load. Many of us were not taught how to share the responsibilitie…
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Caring For People Through The Stages Of Grief
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Grief is hard. No one likes it. It’s never easy. But it is unavoidable. And one of the realities of grief is that it is a special place for Christians to step in and offer care. It is a time when people need someone to come alongside them. People often turn to their faith community most especially during times of grief. So, how does a pastor or oth…
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Ep 144: Trauma in Law Enforcement Families
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As a couple, we are aware that officers and their families can be impacted by the job. Sometimes, the impact is trauma. That trauma can be direct or indirect. Secondary traumatic stress can impact officers, spouses, children, or even extended family and friends. We need to be aware of the signs and symptoms to help ourselves and those we love. Expe…
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Does Sibling Rivalry and Fighting Have to Be the Norm, or Can We Actually Raise Friends for Life? (Ep 120)
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In Episode 120, Kyle and Sara, LPC’s, discuss an all too common problem in families with multiple kids. A lot of families are frustrated with all the fighting in their home. They desperately want their kids to get along but they seem to constantly be fighting and complaining about each other. Is this the way it has to be or are there simplest steps…
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The Power of Technology On Kids And What Parents Can Do About It (Ep 119)
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In Episode 119, Sara and I spend time with Dr. Barbara Sorrels. She is the founder and CEO of the Institute for Childhood Education and Connected Kids, a non-profit dedicated to the support and healing of children from hard places. She shares what she is discovering about the impact technology is having on children. We discuss appropriate ages for …
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The Nuts & Bolts Of Forgiveness: How To Apologize, Forgive, And Help Others Do It Too
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One of the most common calls that Christ gives to his followers is that they should forgive one another. It’s all over the pages of Scripture! And it is hard. When we sin or mess up, it is hard to apologize. We wonder what to say, how to say it, and sometimes if we even need to bother. And then, when others sin against us, we struggle to forgive. B…
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How To Support Your Kids When You Are Changing Your Parenting Approach (Ep 118)
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In Episode 118, Sara and I talk about the difficulty of changing your parenting approach. It is especially true when you have older kids that were raised differently. This can cause a lot of confusion and resentment in older children. We share specific steps to help parents invite the older kids into learning with you. We believe that changing your…
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The Power Of Self Love And The Impact It Can Have On Our Children (Ep 117)
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In Episode 117, Sara and I do a powerful interview with Brad Chandler. He is the host of the podcast called “How to be happier”. He helps people throughout the world learn how to truly accept themselves and become the men and women they want to be. He shares his transformational journey as a parent and how finally loving himself completely changed …
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Ep 143: Hypervigilance in Law Enforcement Families
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Hypervigilance allows officers to stay aware and safe on the job. As an officer or spouse, you may be aware or have a general understanding of hypervigilance. You may even understand that what goes up must come down. Sadly, that single biological process that keeps our officers safe, can spill over like a tsunami in our relationships. We need to be…
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Some Favorite Books To Help Christian Couples (From A Marriage Therapist’s Bookshelf)
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As a Christian counseling agency, one of the most common questions that we get from our local pastors is “How can I help this couple in my church who is struggling?” Today, let’s offer some resources! There are plenty of ideas for conversations, questions to ask, and things to try with couples who are struggling. But one of the best ways to find a …
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Are You Communicating Too Much or Too Little With Your Kids? (Ep 116)
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In Episode 116, Sara and I discuss how kids want to be a part of family business. Kids feel more connected and more empowered when they are invited into the process parents go through in making their decisions. We also discuss how being intentional with our communication can help alleviate the anxiety and powerlessness kids feel when choices are ma…
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What is Conscious Discipline and How Can it Help Parents Raise Self-Controlled Kids? (Ep 115)
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In Episode 115, Sara and I interview Cristy Roberts, a certified Conscious Discipline trainer. She has been teaching teachers and educators for over a decade on how to approach children from a different perspective. She shares her story about her son’s struggles with school and how CD gave her the tools that both she and her son needed to navigate …
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Ministry is HARD. 7 Tips To Avoid Burnout And Stay The Course When It Feels Impossible.
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Is there anything more frustrating than putting a lot of time and energy into helping someone… and they just don’t appreciate it? Or, they just aren’t getting better? You can’t see how the Lord is working or how your efforts are making a difference? Not only is this a very frustrating experience - it can lead us into burnout. When you’re burned out…
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24 Ways to Connect With Your Teenager (Ep 114)
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In Episode 114, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, discuss 24 fun ways to connect with your teenager over the summer and going into the new school year. Teenagers are seeking independence but they also crave a strong relationship with their parents. They are entering a phrase in life that can be overwhelming, and they want to know you will be there with them thr…
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Ep 142: Thriving in and out of the career
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In this podcast episode, host Cyndi Doyle interviews Brian Ellis, a retired law enforcement officer and creator of Magnus Worx, about the importance of wellness and resilience in the law enforcement profession. Wellness is not just a physical issue, but also a mental one, and it is crucial for law enforcement organizations to prioritize the well-be…
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How Can We Stop Food and Eating From Being Such a Power Struggle? (Ep 113)
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In Episode 113, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, have an in depth discussion on food and eating with Mandy Foster. She speaks to groups around the world helping parents raise children that grow up to be curious learners of food. Sara and I discuss our own personal challenges as parents but also just as people in relationship to food. Mandy provides several spe…
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6 Daily Habits To Make You A Mentally and Emotionally Healthy Leader
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Ministry is hard work. Leadership is hard work. Put them together? Unless you are intentional about it, Christian leadership within a church or ministry will take a toll on you. It can quickly and sneakily start to impact your relationships, mental health, emotions, sleep, spiritual life, and so much more. So today, let’s talk about some life habit…
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What Should I Do When My Kid Doesn’t Do What I Ask? (Ep 112)
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In Episode 112, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, discuss one of most common questions parents ask us when we are coaching them. What consequence or punishment should I do when my kid doesn’t do what I ask? We share the steps we take to help parents approach these moments in a different way, which inevitably leads to more cooperation and less resistance. When p…
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Ep 141: Must have Conversations for Every Law Enforcement Couple
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My husband and I were super naive when it came to understanding how his job was going to impact our relationship. I saw it as a career path, just like any other. I mean, sure, there was danger and shift work, but what more could there be? No one told us what to expect or how to make sure our relationship stayed solid. As a couple new to law enforce…
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Practical Action Steps For Helping Someone With Their Anxiety
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“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2, NIV) It is not of question of IF your ministry will touch someone who is struggling with anxiety. It’s a question of when, how often, and what will you do to help. Anxiety is a huge problem in our culture today. And when you are concerned that someone …
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The 5 Pillars Kids Need to Be Prepared for Adulthood (Ep 111)
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In Episode 111, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, interview Nellie Harden, she is an author, speaker, and mother of 4 teenage girls. She shares with us the 5 pillars that prepare kids to leave the nest and feel confident growing into adulthood. We discuss how important it is for our kids to feel worthy and valued so they can become healthy human beings. She als…
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“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7) As you build relationships with people in your ministry, you will certainly interact with people who are struggling with anxiety. But will you recognize them? Anxiety is one of the most common struggles in our modern culture. In fact, it’s so common that many people don’t even r…
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We Can’t Get On the Same Page With Our Parenting! (Ep 110)
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In Episode 110, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, discuss the challenges we faced changing how we parented. Being calm, patient, and loving came much easier to one of us and it was much harder for the other. So many parents we coach report that this is one of the most difficult things to change. When couples fail to parent together it typically begins to destro…
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Do’s And Don'ts For Helping People With Trauma And Emotional Baggage
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“In this world, you will have trouble,” Jesus tells his followers. “But take heart! I have overcome the world.” One of the long-term “troubles” that many people in your ministry struggle with is the aftermath of trauma, hurt, and emotional baggage. In fact, you may struggle with this yourself. In our broken world, trauma and emotional pain is very …
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Why Is Play So Important and Do I Really Need To Do It? (Ep 109)
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In Episode 109, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, interview Hayley Williams, a licensed clinical social worker and registered play therapist. She shares with us how important play is for children’s development and connection with their parents. She provides easy-to-take steps for every parent to begin playing with their kids today. We also discussed what play t…
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Moral Injuries are a significant yet often unrecognized issue among first responders. Understanding what a moral injury is and recognizing its potential impact on careers and families is crucial to their overall wellness. In this episode, Judy Couwels talks about what moral injuries are, how to recognize them, and how to combat their impact. The Fi…
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10 Coping Skills Every Pastor & Ministry Leader Needs
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Ministry work can take its toll on us. And in the busyness of it all, sometimes we forget to put any time or energy into caring for ourselves. But when we live this way, we start to feel it - in our emotional wellness, mental health, physical energy, and in our relationships. Today, we’ll look at 10 key areas of life where we ALL need coping skills…
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How Do We Get Our Kids to Read and Help Around the House? (Ep 108)
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In Episode 108, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, discuss the common motivational technique of paying kids to do reading, chores, and other activities. Is this method helping motivate them or is it more likely to demotivate them? What other things can we do as parents to get them do this stuff if we aren’t paying them? Maybe we need to change the question all t…
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8 Unique Ways A Spiritual Leader Can Help Someone Fight An Addiction
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Addictions recovery can feel like an overwhelming issue that is best left to the “professionals.” But the Bible is clear that there is only one ultimate Healer… and his name is not Dr. Jesus. It’s Jesus Christ, Lord and Savior. So if you are a pastor, a Bible study leader, a Christian friend, a youth mentor - or any other ministry leader - you have…
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In Episode 107, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, interview Dr. Amy King, a licensed psychologist. We have a fascinating conversation about resiliency and trauma. We discuss what trauma is and isn’t and how connection plays a powerful role in shaping how trauma affects our children. At the end, she lays out specific steps that parents can do today to build resi…
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Resources For Helping Someone Fight Addiction
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Ministry work involves helping people through many difficult and painful life circumstances. And one of the hardest is helping people who are dealing with an addiction. There are a lot of ways that pastors and other Christian leaders can help people when they are fighting addiction, but one of the most basic ways is to offer practical, Christ-cente…
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“Are We There Yet? How Can We Enjoy The Journey As Parents?” (Ep 106)
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In Episode 106, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, discuss how embracing parenting as a journey rather than a destination has changed how we view each stage with our children. As parents we often resist the present moment and white knuckle our way through the sleepless nights and all of the diapers. However, by doing this we often miss the beauty and the joy tha…
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“Isn’t Peaceful Parenting Really Just Permissive Parenting?” (Ep 105)
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In Episode 105, Kyle and Sara, LPCs, interview Sarah Rosensweet, a Peaceful Parenting Coach. She discusses how Peaceful Parenting isn’t permissive at all and how she is passionate about helping parents reimagine what it could look like in their families. She explains how parenting her kids this way has helped her raise children that are generous an…
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Ep 139: Communication Challenges in Special Assignments
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Communication and connection are a challenge for all of us in law enforcement relationships. There are some extra special challenges when you're on call all the time or you're in situations where you just can't talk due to being in a special assignment such as undercover work or maybe the part of a SWAT team. Heather Williams, a law enforcement pro…
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FitMinded Living - Collaboration over Competition
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Welcome to Fitminded Living, the podcast where we explore topics related to health, wellness, and empowerment. In this special episode, we delve into the power of collaboration over competition, featuring two inspiring girl bosses who are making waves in their respective industries. Join us as we sit down with Melissa DiMecurio and Chandra Metz, tw…
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How To Change Persistent Ongoing Conflicts With Your Children? (Ep 104)
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By Parenting Legacy
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Quick Tips For How To Make Sure Other People Feel Heard And Valued By You
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Hearing people and helping people FEEL heard are two different things. In today’s busy, loud, disconnected world, feeling heard is an incredibly meaning experience. Everyone wants to know that they are seen, valued, and appreciated. Of course, we cannot make people feel anything. We cannot guarantee that people will always react to us in the way we…
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Mother of 3 kids under the age of four needs help now! (Ep 103)
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In Episode 103, Kyle and Sara, LPCs talk with Kelly Tietsort about her experience as a mom of a teenager and pre-teen twins. When she came to us for help the kids were all under the age of 4, there were huge tantrums, and they were struggling with how to handle their kids' aggression. Kelly and her husband Zach were exhausted and didn’t know what e…
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3 Keys To Being A Good Listener (Even When You're Distracted)
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Many of us think we are better listeners than we really are. But there is a reason the Bible tells us to be quick to listen and slow to speak (James 1:19). Listening is powerful and important. And the reality of human relationships is that being a GOOD listener does take some intentional effort. It’s more than just hearing the words someone is sayi…
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Is tracking our kids locations and grades helpful or hurtful to their growth? (Ep 102)
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In Episode 102, Kyle and Sara, LPCs discuss the growing ability parents have to track their kids. We discuss the positive and negative outcomes that may come as a result of using this technology. Does it help our kids be safe while also hinder our kids from learning valuable skills they need for adulthood? Is there a way to use the technology while…
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How to intentionally connect with our kids in a world full of technological distractions (Ep 101)
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In Episode 101, Kyle and Sara, LPCs have a discussion with Joey Odom, father of 2 teenagers and founder of Aro. He shares his transformational journey from being a distracted dad to an intentional one. We talk with him about how challenging it can be to really be present with our children. We also dive into how our kids need and want us to model wh…
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It’s never too late to start parenting differently (Ep 100)
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In Episode 100, Kyle and Sara, LPCs celebrate reaching this milestone by sharing some of the ways the podcast has helped families. Then we dive into a conversation where we discuss some of the ways we have recently messed up as parents. We invite every parent, no matter where they are on their journey, to join us as we continue to grow and change. …
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How To Use Philippians 4:8 To Replace Patterns Of Negative Thinking
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One of the most common things that Christian counselors help clients with is getting their thought life more in line with Philippians 4:8. When someone is stuck in negative thinking, it is not honoring to God and not helpful to their relationships or emotional health. And guess what? Pastors and ministry leaders struggle with their thinking too! In…
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How storytelling and play can transform your child’s behavior (Ep 99)
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In Episode 99, Kyle and Sara, LPCs interview Sarah Moore, author of the book Peaceful Discipline. She has been featured on NBC, CBS, and many parenting magazines. We dive into her journey as a parent and the transformational moment that changed how she wanted to parent. She also shares how Story Teaching is a powerful tool that can help children pr…
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“I just don't want to burden my spouse with what I experience on the job” is a way of protecting the people that you love. I always thought my husband was open only to find out later that this happened a few times within our relationship. Most of the time an officer's spouse and family sense that something is up. It bleeds over. While protecting th…
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Dealing With Negative, Unhelpful Thought Patterns By Using The 5 R’s
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Even strong Christians sometimes struggle with negative thinking. We can get stuck overthinking things, blaming ourselves for problems, grumbling, or judging others in our thoughts. But there are strategies that will help! As you pray over these struggles, confess your sin, and seek the Holy Spirit’s help, these 5 strategies will give you practical…
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Mother of 2, an Arbonne VP, (living off the grid), decides she won’t spank, but doesn’t know what else to do (Ep 98)
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In Episode 98, Kyle and Sara, LPCs interview Bethany Jones about her journey raising 2 girls off the grid. Early on in their parenting, she and her husband Jimmy made a decision they weren’t going to spank their kids and they knew they needed some other tools. This is when they sought out parent coaching. Needless to say this was a huge shift for t…
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4 Key Steps To Conflict Resolution In A Ministry Context
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At some point in life, everyone will struggle with conflict. The church is not immune! Even in the best ministry, there are different personalities, priorities, and preferences. Conflict will happen. So what’s a pastor or leader to do? Of course, the top urgency is to start with prayer. Pray for the other person, for the situation, for your own rea…
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Saying STOP IT! doesn’t change anything - let’s try something different (Ep 97)
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In Episode 97, Kyle and Sara, LPCs discuss how common it is for kids and parents to use "Stop" as a tool to resolve conflict. However, all it typically accomplishes is creating power struggles within the family. We share 4 specific steps we use that will help parents and kids to actually make long-lasting change. Get our video courses at https://ar…
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We have all worked in a toxic work environment due to the workplace culture, co-workers, supervisors, or the work itself. Stephanie Kiesow is a former law enforcement officer, cop kid, and cop’s wife. She saw how work impacted her parents, their mood, and in turn the family. She started her career in law enforcement at 18 and in 2011, when her…
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