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Breathing Wind

Sarah Davis and Naila Francis

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Breathing Wind is a podcast about grief and loss and how we journey with these lifelong companions. Naila Francis, grief coach, writer and former journalist and Sarah Davis, podcast consultant, speaker and writer, are cohosts. We offer warm, honest and insightful conversations for the introspective at heart. Launched in 2019 as a personal grief project, the podcast struck a chord with listeners looking for a space to feel less alone in their grief. Quickly, a dedicated community grew around ...
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“As a death midwife, one of the things many of us do is work on legacy projects with people who are dying and their loved ones, and yet sometimes I think it's really not up to us to know what our legacy is. I can hope it will be this particular thing, but at the end of the day, the people we leave behind are the ones really making the meaning and i…
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“I think some of the clearest decisions I've ever made have come in the aftermath of grief.” ~Naila Francis In this episode, we look back on our enchanting and insightful conversation with Mara June, an educator, facilitator, community weaver, writer, caregiver, death doula and community herbalist. Reflecting on her deep belief in the creative ener…
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"In allowing ourselves to feel our grief, or to feel present with whatever is coming up for us — not excluding our joy — that's actually helping us to feel more deeply in all of these areas in our life. And I think that is part of the enchantment piece for me...When we feel more deeply, then we can also feel enchantment and wonder and awe and all o…
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In this episode, inspired by our powerful conversation with communal grief tender and song circle leader, Alexandra “Ahlay” Blakeley, we discuss our own experiences with song circles and how they impacted us — as well our thoughts on community grief spaces in general, and how grief support is so much broader than the stereotypical basement circle f…
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“I believe that community singing, which I define as, when a group of folks come together and they sing songs together that are easy enough lyrically and easy enough melodically to be taught in the moment. And then we sing these songs, which I personally call spells or prayers together that are amplified and help put us in some sort of altered stat…
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“When I was on the Camino, there was this moment when I was spreading [my dad’s] ashes and just talking to him and I realized that was why I was there, that he wanted me there. And I felt so connected to him, and at that time I remember thinking, ‘This is so simple. I can turn off everything and go out for a walk in the woods and be connected with …
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“If we have the intention to live with love and compassion, we can handle anything. We are amazing beings, we humans. We can also really screw up badly, but if we have the intention to live with love and compassion, it changes what we do and how we are.” ~ Susan J. Tweit In her memoir, Bless the Birds: Living with Love in a Time of Dying, Susan J. …
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“Our Christmas lights now are all blue since Ron left. I want to honor the day and the spirit of it, but the bright, shining twinkle lights and jingle bells don't speak to my heart. When the blue lights are turned on, the room is bathed with a lovely blue, which creates exactly the right atmosphere to sink into the holy yet joyful season.” ~Marge S…
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"If you're willing to open to the journey and if you're willing to really allow yourself to feel your grief and have practices to engage it, it does shape-shift over time. It does become softer. It does become something that you can carry maybe with a little more...lightness and grace." ~Naila Francis In this episode, we delve into varied facets of…
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“Just having that dream visit, even just one visit, can nourish somebody and really give them the courage to go into their grief because it's not enough to have those dreams. It doesn't negate the pain of their physical absence. You still need to do the hard work. You still need to go into your grief and really unwind all of those stories and all o…
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“I think runners, by nature, have this environment of excitement and energy and support just built into a race. It doesn't matter how fast you're running. You're just all together and you're all part of this big happy bubble of energy. It's always a feeling of belonging.” — Sarah Davis In this week’s episode, we reflect on our conversation with hip…
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“I have never been more practiced in honoring my grief, and I truly have never had more gratitude and joy and reverence for life…When you really feel into grief, my experience is you’re able to love and feel a part of the life force that moves through all living things.” ~ Dwight Dunston In our season 5 opener, artist, educator and activist Dwight …
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In this bonus episode, we reflect on our conversation with Dan Fischer of One Last Wave, an amazing project that invites grievers to memorialize their loved ones by having their names etched on a surfboard that Dan takes out to sea. This episode highlights the kind of exclusive content we share on Patreon. It also covers so much ground, as we muse …
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“Having an established creative practice helped me in ways I would have never known, and I think it’s the greatest gift my younger self gave me now.” ~ Rosemmery Wahtola Trommer This month, we’re offering you a feed swap. This is the second episode we’re swapping. For the first episode in this swap, check out Episode Swap! Emerging Form Discusses C…
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“Grief cracks you open. It makes us vulnerable… I feel vulnerable.” ~ Christie Aschwanden “A creative practice prepared me for grief.” ~ Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer This month, we’re offering you a feed swap. Emerging Form, co-hosted by poet Rosemmery Wahtola Trommer and journalist Christie Aschwanden, is a podcast about creative process. These two f…
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“[Grief] breaks us open, which we may not expect. There's some allowing that has to happen. I'm going to allow this to break me open, to grow a new heart, to connect with people in a more meaningful way, to live a life that's more authentic. I think the breaking open, while it can be hard and scary, speaks to grief as a generative force and the way…
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“It's healthy, I believe, to touch these places. I don't know how you can touch your love place without touching your grief place. They're both there. They're layered on top of each other and your joy place. They're all there, and when we shut down, we shut down all the good stuff, too.” ~Nnenna Freelon In this week’s episode, Grammy-nominated jazz…
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"Grief, for me, has been about following intuition. It's been about following the feelings. I don’t know what they're saying to me. I wish I knew, but I kind of have given up trying to figure it out. And I'm just letting the grief coexist with me, and that's where we're at.” ~Sarah Davis In this week’s episode, we explore grief as it’s surfaced — o…
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"Something that I didn't have any sense of before...was happiness was up here and grief was down here, where it's really not. It's a universal human experience to lose. If we can recognize that we're all going through similar things and be able to share that, I think it's very healing." ~ Dan Fischer In this week’s episode, Dan Fischer reflects on …
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“I think with any person's life, there's a lot of joy. There's a lot of beauty, there's a lot of love and hope, but there's also a lot of grief and tragedy and, and sorrow.” ~ Christina Vo In this week’s episode, Sarah reflects on many of the conversations she had in Season 1, as well as a few from Seasons 2-3, contributed by guests who reflect on …
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“Some people think solitude and loneliness are the same thing, but to me solitude is almost this soulful, nourishing kind of quality that I need, [that] we need, and especially when we're grieving.” — Naila Francis In this episode, we reflect on our earlier conversation with Sarah Chaves. We explore why silence and solitude are essential for both o…
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“Grief is ever present. It's not like this little cloud that hangs above my head. That's not it. It's the fact that it is a lens through which I view the world and all my relationships constantly. I cannot take off that lens.” ~ Sarah Chaves In this week’s episode, author Sarah Chaves brings us a rich and stirringly honest conversation about grievi…
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“Leaning into love is leaning into grief,” — Sarah Davis In this week’s episode, co-hosts Naila and Sarah muse on our conversation with poet Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer and all she gifted us with her openness and generosity. Inspired by how she’s being guided by her word of the year — “hello” — we share our own words for 2023. We also talk about our …
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“I really trust life itself to rise up and help me meet the things that I cannot control. I trust love to show up and help me meet the things that I cannot control.” ~ Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer In this week’s episode, Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer cries and laughs her way through an expansive and nourishing conversation about grief, creativity and love…
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“[Grief is] really almost like a relationship. It's not, ‘Here's this chapter of my life, here's this season of my life. Here's this thing I have to focus on now or get through now;’ [Instead] it's this enduring relationship that you're always in. And, it changes over time, just like the real relationships in our life change over time and things co…
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Welcome to the Breathing Wind Season 3 finale. In this season, we explored joy in context of grief. In other words, how does joy show up for us in the wild? How is joy an act of resilience? What if joy is unexpected? How do we embody joy? This episode is a collection of some of our favorite moments from the season. If any of these excerpts sound pa…
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"While I never know what it's like to celebrate the holiday season with my aging mother, I've come to appreciate her presence in my life in a way that makes sense to those who savor Christmas, keeping their decorations up long into the new year. She's in my warm, salty tears that still flow at times. She's in the cold autumn fall. When I see the le…
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“There really is not a timeline. You do not know how long it may take. It's a journey and it's something you carry, not much different than love. I really think that, just like love doesn't have a timeline, why would grief?” — Kendra Rinaldi In this week’s episode, Kendra Rinaldi, grief coach and podcast host of Grief, Gratitude & the Grey in Betwe…
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"Grabbing those moments and claiming them for yourself so that you have a bit of goodness and nourishment to support you as you go on the sometimes really hard road of grieving…that’s really important.” —Oceana Sawyer In this week’s episode, Oceana Sawyer speaks with producer, Sarah Davis, about the themes that surfaced and shared some of our favor…
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“There's just something about the air. If you live by the ocean, there's a saltiness in the air. You can smell the fruit every morning as you walk the streets, depending on if it's a market day or what's in season. So it really grounds you and places you in time, space, memory, where you are, who you're connected with, and what's happening.” — Rosh…
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“My grief is the one at the wheel.” — Karine bell In this episode, Karine Bell speaks of several significant life transformations for her — birth of her daughter, death of her mother and father. In each, she emphasizes the conditions she had to feel safe in her grief and the layers she experienced. The Possibility of Pleasure miniseries hosted by O…
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“We have to be very awake in a really deep, rooted way…And listening with not just our ears, but all of our senses really.” —Melanie DeMore, on singing for people at the end of their lives. This week’s episode features a conversation between Oceana Sawyer and Melanie DeMore, three-time Grammy nominated singer/composer, choral conductor, music direc…
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“Joy allows you to open up a little bit — expand just a little bit — and reach for something maybe that you couldn't see before.” —Oceana Sawyer In this week’s episode, Oceana Sawyer and Sarah Davis talk about Oceana’s background, her guests for this miniseries, as well as some of her thoughts on joy and grieving. This episode is part of a Breathin…
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“When I just let myself surrender and fully feel the grief, there's a certain point where my body knows that it can't take anymore. I often feel a rebound — and sometimes that is in the form of humor or other lightness — but I've also found that, when I don't just let myself fully feel, it doesn't happen.” Dara Kosberg In this week’s episode, Dara …
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“One of my teachers says that all emotions contain their opposite. So when I'm willing to be with the grief, I have access to joy again. Instead of this armoring that comes very natural to us, we do our best to remain to find the willingness to open in an undefended way.” — Vinny Ferraro In this episode, Dara and Sarah talk with Vinny Ferraro about…
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“We often feel like maybe it's a betrayal of our grief to feel joy or that there's no room in grief for joy, or that it means, if we're grieving the loss of somebody who died that we loved, maybe we're not loving or honoring their memory enough or whatever the stories are that we tell ourselves. But we need joy to hold the heavy and the sad.” Naila…
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“I understood really early about when you go through extreme grief, that there's loss in different kinds of ways. It’s not just the person that passed away…It’s all the threads that hold you close.” Colleen Attara In this episode, Naila talks with Colleen Attara about her early experience of grief and how that’s informed her journey as an artist an…
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"So it's not [about] bypassing the grief, or bypassing any of it. It's about creating space for it, holding it, seeing it, recognizing it, having a conversation with it, you know, and really honoring it. And knowing that underneath that is this place for you to access your joy as well." Simone Baker This episode is part of the Breathing Wind minise…
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"I think you really have to have the sad to also appreciate the beauty." Moon Fang This episode is a part of the Breathing Wind miniseries titled Joy as Resilience, hosted by Naila Francis. The Joy as Resilience miniseries explores why embracing joy is not frivolous and how cultivating it can help us weather challenging times and open our lives to …
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"Personally for me, joy is my inherent nature. I really do feel it to be the essence of who I am and how I move through the world, which is interesting because so much of the work I do is around grief and loss and dying. And yet those experiences and journeys are so much more expansive than we might believe them to be, and are capable of holding jo…
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"So they experienced this death. And then they all have to band together – ‘we're still going to make everything happen.’ That's kind of how I felt after my dad passed away; I'm just going to do everything that I need to do." Angela Tabora This episode is part of a Breathing Wind miniseries titled Grief and Humor, co-hosted by Dara Kosberg and Sara…
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"…you have to find the humor. If it's not in their death, it's maybe something in their life.” Erin Lim “My dad used to say that laughter is the best medicine…. I feel like it balances you out as well because you can't have the grief without the joy.” Angela Tabora This episode is part of a Breathing Wind miniseries titled Grief and Humor, co-hoste…
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“It feels like a wilderness exploration journey where, yeah, some parts of it we know and love. And some parts of it, we just don't know enough. And it's always a bit of a discovery. And the weather's always going to be different.” — Duncan Cheung This episode is part of a Breathing Wind miniseries titled Inner and Outer Wilderness, hosted by Dunca…
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"No one can avoid negative stuff happening. Negative stuff happens all the time on a lot of different levels, whether I got gum on the bottom of my shoe, or my father died, right? And everything in between. We can't control that. And again, nature is the perfect metaphor for this – being out in the wilderness helps cultivate your ability to stay wi…
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"When we give ourselves some space to just be, that's where those quiet little moments [of joy] can pop up alongside the grief." Lindsay Joy Taylor In this bonus episode, Sarah talks with Lindsay Joy Taylor, grief advocate and founder of The Joyful Jewelry Box, about her mom, inspiration behind the remembrance jewelry she creates, Mother’s Day and …
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“Out there, we are not our Mercedes or our home or our job or our degrees. We are just us. And it's enough.” Karen Najarian This episode is part of a Breathing Wind miniseries titled Inner and Outer Wilderness, hosted by Duncan Cheung. The Inner and Outer Wilderness miniseries explores the wonderment of and between the wilderness out there and with…
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“So, in the pursuit of healing, joy is kind of a natural byproduct of that for me. But it takes a tremendous amount of work and awareness to recognize joy when it's present, because it's not always sunshine and rainbows and unicorns and hippie dippy stuff. Sometimes joy is just the absence of despair, that can feel tremendous — especially coming ou…
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"Be fully there. Breathe it in, listen to what the winds have to say. What the birds have to say, what the water has to say, and (this sounds so crunchy granola) it really boils down to that simple thing: it's just being there. And when I'm there, I'm here. I'm fully present in the moment, in time and in space. And when I sit after a long, grueling…
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"The undercurrent of the Camino is pilgrimage; it's walking in some spiritual way and being willing to rely on the kindness and support of others. You're removed from everything that you know. It's not your language, it's not your home, it's not your community. It's not your anything. And yet you put yourself in that situation, expecting that there…
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“Chemo was really hard. But there were really good days too – they weren't the best feeling healthy days – but there was something that happened on those days. You suddenly have the shift in perspective of appreciating the smallest things, because when you have something that's knocking you, sideways, weekly – I was having chemo every week for 12 w…
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