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Processing Trauma Out Loud

Kandace Rather & Sher Nyquist

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Conversations about trauma and healing from two women who are doing the work. The scars of childhood trauma don’t fade away. The roots go deep. This trauma can wrap tentacles around every aspect of life, pushing and pulling us according to its will. These stories of harm have been hard wired into our brain. Yet, we don’t see the connection of childhood trauma and current day pain because it has been with us as far back as we can recall. We don’t realize this trauma is the source of our strug ...
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show series
 
In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss their journeys on learning what it means to notice dysregulation in our bodies and why that’s important. The more aware we become, the more we are able to care for ourselves before we go into higher levels of stress. Listen in as Kandace and Sher describe what it feels like for them when they notice thei…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher wrap up a 4-part series on setting boundaries within our relationships. One of the hardest situations we can be in is when our boundaries are being continually crossed. Not knowing we have options can leave us feeling trapped and alone. Listen in as Kandace and Sher bring encouragement around the topic of settin…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue their discussion around boundaries. Setting boundaries is a gift we can give in all our relationships in order to foster a mutually satisfying relationship. Listen in to a topic that can change our ability to create the relationships we desire! If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast o…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue the discussion on what it looks like to set healthy boundaries in our lives. One of the hardest things we can feel is that we have no options, but we do! Listen in as Kandace and Sher offer an invitation to evaluate your current level of mutually satisfying relationships, and to get the support you need…
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In today’s episode, Kandace & Sher have the honor of interviewing Stephanie and Kate about their upcoming story group. Stephanie & Kate also share a little bit of their stories and how story work has changed their lives. Listen in as Kandace and Sher invite anyone wanting to go deeper into healing to join a story work group! If you have a chance, p…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher start a four-part series on what it means to set boundaries coming from a trauma-informed perspective. When we are healing from CPTSD, part of our healing will involve learning how to set loving boundaries that protect ourselves and others. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss this important topic. If you have …
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In today’s episode, Kandace continues to tell Sher the story of her recent traumatic experience at a local park in her community. Listen in as Kandace and Sher make a plea for everyone in positions of influence to become trauma-informed in order to provide the kind of care someone needs who experiences trauma. Find Karen's book on Amazon: https://a…
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In today’s episode, Kandace continues to tell Sher the story of her recent traumatic experience at a local park in her community. Listen in as Kandace and Sher make a plea for everyone in positions of influence to become trauma-informed in order to provide the kind of care someone needs who experiences trauma. If you have a chance, please rate and …
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher walk through a recent traumatic event Kandace experienced at one of her local walking parks. Traumatic events that get processed in real time allow our nervous systems to release stored emotions, and therefore, the emotions do not get stuck in our body. Listen in as Sher walks Kandace through this unfortunate ex…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher revisit the conversation around attachment styles and healing our attachment wounds. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss what it’s been like to find healing in courageous spaces of love and kindness. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service. Your feedback is…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss more on the topic of what it was like to use our voice as a child. Listen in as Kandace engages Sher in a recent story where Sher found deeper healing in using her voice in a way she was never aloud as a child. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service.…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher embark on a compelling 2-part series delving into the profound impact of childhood experiences on our voices. They explore how our voices may have been stifled or silenced altogether during our formative years. Childhood trauma often leaves a lingering imprint, manifesting in understandable yet unexpressed anger…
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In today’s episode, Sher interviews Kandace about the memoir she has written and will soon publish. Listen in as Sher asks Kandace what her hope is in sharing the stories of her teenage years and how she has come to love the teenage girl she once was. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service. You…
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In today’s episode, Kandace interviews Sher about the violence in her own story, and the further harm of it being witnessed by those who could have helped us as children. Having witnesses today of the harm we experienced in our childhood can lead us into healing in ways we could have never imagined it. Until we do! If you have a chance, please rate…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher celebrate their 100th podcast episode and review their healing journey. Listen in and hear how their podcast has helped other women on the path of healing from childhood trauma. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service. Your feedback is extremely valuable and …
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss the theme of childhood emotional neglect. Though childhood emotional neglect can be harder to identify, it’s often the culprit of the struggle we have to express our emotions and get clarity on what we need. Listen in as Kandace engages Sher’s recent struggle to connect what she needed, and how attunemen…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher tackle the theme of Parentification. Children who experience complex childhood trauma often are placed in family roles that they were never meant to be in. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss examples from their own stories. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming …
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In today’s episode, Sher interviews Kandace about her recent invitation to speak on healing hurt in the workplace. Listen in as Kandace shares her passion for bringing people the care and nurture they need to heal trauma and live out their calling. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service. Your f…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue the conversation about triangulation and how we heal when we discovered we were triangulated as a child. Triangulation occurs more often than we might be aware, but as we learn there’s a better way, we can choose a different path. Listen in as Kandace and Sher wrap up this 2-part series on triangulation…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher talk about the theme of triangulation within our stories of childhood trauma. Triangulation is particularly painful for a child as no child wants to be in the middle of adult relationships. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss what triangulation is and the effects it has on children. If you have a chance, pleas…
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Today’s episode comes with a caution as Kandace and Sher discuss the topic of complicity in childhood sexual abuse. Though we know sexual abuse is never the child’s fault, why do many children grow up feeling they played a role in being abused? Listen in as Kandace and Sher talk about why this is true and how we heal from the lies when the real tru…
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Today’s episode comes with a caution as Kandace and Sher discuss the topic of complicity in childhood sexual abuse. Though we know sexual abuse is never the child’s fault, why do many children grow up feeling they played a role in being abused? Listen in as Kandace and Sher talk about why this is true and how we heal from the lies when the real tru…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue a discussion on the goodness they’ve witnessed from those they’ve worked with as clients. Many times our current day challenges are connected to old, young stories that are asking for care. Listen in as Kandace and Sher highlight how Story Work helps us show up differently in our relationships and caree…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss the ways they’ve seen Story Work bring healing into the lives of their clients. Until our stories of harm are brought into the light with those who can be with us in our anger and grief, we remain stuck in various ways. Listen in as Kandace and Sher continue this series on why they love Story Work. If yo…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why they love Story Work as a healing modality when getting help from the effects of childhood trauma. When we’ve been harmed as young children, there are shifts that occur that influence our beliefs about who we are and how the world is. Listen in to part two of this new series on why Kandace and Sher l…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why they love Story Work as a healing modality when getting help from the effects of childhood trauma. When we’ve been harmed as young children, there are shifts that occur that influence our beliefs about who we are and how the world is. Sher names these shifts that come in the form of curses and vows. …
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher wrap up a two-part series on what it means to have a victim-mindset. Once we find a safe place to share our stories of being victimized, we can move towards the healing we need and leave the victim mindset behind. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss with compassion over why it can be hard to name the victim mi…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher tackle the topic of what it means to have a victim-mindset. If you were once a victim, and have never received care, it makes sense you would have a victim-mindset. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss this important topic with awareness and deep compassion for those who have been victimized. If you have a chan…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue the discussion on dreams and desires. When we feel blocked in pursuing our dreams and desires, we can slow down and be curious about the stories that are asking for more healing. Listen in as Kandace and Sher wrap up this two-part series of the goodness of tapping into our dreams and desires. Link to Sh…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher start off the New Year talking about dreams and desires for 2024. If you find it hard to know what you desire and struggle to dream, there’s a reason. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss some of their hopes and desires for the coming year. Link to Sher's course on Art and Healing: https://www.processingtraumao…
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In todays episode, Kandace and Sher continue the topic of arousal structures. Understanding our particular arousal structures and how they are connected to our childhood trauma, can help us move out of painful patterns and into new ways of showing up in our relationships. Listen in as Kandace and Sher take on this difficult, but important topic. Li…
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In todays episode, Kandace and Sher discuss the topic of arousal structures. Understanding our particular arousal structures and how they are connected to our childhood trauma, can help us move out of painful patterns and into new ways of showing up in our relationships. Listen in as Kandace and Sher take on this difficult, but important topic. Lin…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher process several reasons why we can find it so difficult to ask for help. Whether it’s feelings of shame, feeling like we’re a burden, or feeling like no one cares, we can slowly move towards asking for help knowing healing is available. Listen in as Kandace and Sher express their invitation to reach out and ask …
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why it’s so important to find our courage to ask for help. Though asking for help is a simple request, it’s more complicated when asking for help in the past did not end well. Listen in as Kandace and Sher bring this important topic to the table. Link to Sher's course on Art and Healing: https://www.proc…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher have a conversation around what it means to honor our losses and the importance of grieving to heal. Though grief can be sometimes take our breathe away, every tear we cry on the journey matters. Link to Sher's course on Art and Healing: https://www.processingtraumaoutloud.com/arthealingcourse?fbclid=IwAR16Sh1-z…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher look back on this last year and name a few things they are grateful for. One of the greatest gifts of staying on the healing journey is experiencing the joy of having safe and secure attachments. Listen in and consider what it might mean for you to begin your healing journey today! Link to Sher's course on Art a…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher interview Dawn Kuhlman, trauma-informed mediator and director of March Mediation in Liberty, Missouri. Dawn’s desire to bring compassionate understanding in helping her clients navigate conflict comes from her own healing journey of having complex trauma. Listen in as the conversation takes us to a beautiful con…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher wrap up a 4-part series processing why having self-compassion is a key to healing from the affects of childhood trauma. When we begin to tell our stories of shame and are met with deep compassion and love, we begin to heal. Listen in as Kandace and Sher invite you to begin the healing journey. Link to Sher's cou…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue discussing the importance of having self-compassion in order to heal from developmental trauma. Listen in as they talk about what self-compassion is and how it develops. Link to Sher's course on Art and Healing: https://www.processingtraumaoutloud.com/arthealingcourse?fbclid=IwAR16Sh1-zqJj2fmsF2tpx2z4JP…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss why it can be difficult to develop self-compassion if you’ve grown up believing that you are the problem. Until we see our stories more truly, from a posture of self-compassion, we can remain stuck in harsh, negative emotions towards ourselves. Listen in as Sher asks Kandace questions about her experienc…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher start a new topic in their cultivation series about what it means to be self-compassionate. In early childhood, self-compassion either develops or it doesn't. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss their journeys of moving away from self-contempt and into a posture of self-compassion that seeks to heal. Link to S…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher talk through Sher’s journey of healing through using watercolors and creating her recent online course Art and Healing. Listen in as Kandace interviews Sher about how painting with watercolors has become a bottom-up approach to her own healing and now can be a resource for you as well! If you have a chance, plea…
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In todays episode, Kandace and Sher discuss specifics on how to develop greater self-awareness. Though we will never be perfectly self-aware, we can become more self-aware and experience greater satisfaction in our relationship to others and to ourselves. Listen in as Kandace and Sher highlight the ways they’ve increased in their own self-awareness…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue their cultivation series discussing the topic of self-awareness. Developing self-awareness can help us heal from the effects of childhood trauma. Listen in as Sher engages with Kandace about her recent experience leading a story work weekend and how having self-awareness deepened her joy of serving othe…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher conclude the topic of cultivating the trait of being a good listener. Though we will never be perfect listeners, we can become listeners! Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss what it means that we all have to work through forming judgements and assumptions as a listener. If you have a chance, please rate and re…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss how it feels to be deeply listened to. What does it mean when someone leans in and genuinely desires to hear more? Listen in as Kandace and Sher name three things they’ve experienced in the presence of a good listener. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming …
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher continue their discussion on cultivating the trait of being a deep listener. When we’ve experienced complex childhood trauma, we know something of what it means to feel dismissed in conversation or consumed in conversation. Listen in as Kandace and Sher talk through the experience difference and invite you to be…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher begin a new series looking at how we cultivate specific traits we want to grow in as we heal from the affects of complex childhood trauma. Deep listening is a gift we are given and a gift we can offer in order to experience feeling seen and heard. Listen in as Kandace and Sher discuss how deep listening is a tra…
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In today’s episode, Kandace and Sher discuss what it means to have an inner-critic. Critical thoughts that seem to control us can be confronted and cared for. Listen in as Kandace and Sher give three things we can do when critical thoughts arise. If you have a chance, please rate and review this podcast on your preferred streaming service. Your fee…
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