We are Steve and Julia Cummings and we are empty nesters who desire to maintain healthy relationship with our adult children. We have found that something needs to change in us, the parent, when our child becomes an adult. We need to ”pivot” from parenting, to partnering. What does that look like? When do I say something and when do I not? Why won’t they listen to me? We address these questions and host more in a real, raw an vulnerable way in real time. Tune in each week as we help you beco ...
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We explore what it means to be a woman. Discussing real life challenges from being a daughter, a wife, a mother, a single mom and beyond. Two friends with a few things in common, but living in worlds so very different. One is married with all girls, the other is divorced with all boys. We are perfect book ends to speak from opposite perspectives on all the things. Our common mission is to search out the heart of a woman and pour into you wherever you are with real life wisdom, actionable ste ...
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Partners: Find Joy in This Season! Here's How
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Pivoting from parent to partner can seem like there's more negative than positive going on. It takes a shift in thinking and relating to your adult child in an entirely different way. But in this new season as you pivot, there is joy to be found. You just have to look for it. On this edition of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia share two di…
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How to Tell If You're Stuck in "Parent Mode"
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The pivot from parent to partner is not easy. It's not a "one and done." It's not even about "checking the box." Pivoting can be hard for some parents and the question that comes up often is: "How can I tell if I'm stuck in parent mode?" On this edition of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia get real and vulnerable about being aware of some t…
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Anxiety, Idols and Becoming a Prodigal Partner
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Do you struggle with anxiety about how your adult child(ren) are living their lives? It could be the job they've chosen, or maybe they're struggling to make it on their own. You're left feeling weary and asking yourself the question: "My adult child isn't living the life I'd like them to. What's a parent, I mean . . . what's a PARTNER to do?" On th…
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Musings of an Adult Child: Interview with Steve & Julia Cummings
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If you've ever wanted to be a "fly on the wall" of a real-life, real-time, intimate conversation with pivoting partners and their adult child - this is the podcast you will be glad you heard. The tables get turned on Steve and Julia on this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast when their daughter Jamilyn interviews them about a variety of issues she…
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Pivoting Includes Intentional Legacy Building: Interview with Wayne Rice
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What do junior high ministry, bluegrass music and long-distance grandparenting have to do with pivoting from a parent to a partner? You'll find out when you listen to this week's Parent Pivot Podcast as Steve and Julia interview Wayne Rice. Don't miss hearing how you can have an impact on your children's children - even when your adult kids set har…
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Pivoting to Partner Means Being a Buffalo, Not a Cow
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We spend so much of our lives constantly trying to avoid the inevitable challenges that come along from the difficult circumstances that our very own choices have led us to be in. What buffaloes do is very unique for the animal kingdom. What does this have to do with being the parent of adult children? Steve and Julia have a unique way to get their…
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Majoring on the Minors Fractures Relationship
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We all do it. We can't help it. We choose hills to die on that we regret later and we ask ourselves, "Was it worth it?" Choosing to bite our tongue and have relationship with our adult child(ren) over being right is key to pivoting well from "parent" to "partner." Join Steve and Julia on The Parent Pivot Podcast as they help us navigate the minefie…
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When the Pivot to Partner Becomes Lonely: There's Hope!
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Pivoting from a parent to a partner comes with a mixture of emotions. You might feel down, lonely, or a bit unsure about what to do with all the new free time you suddenly have. It's a big change, after all. Your job as the parent has shifted, and now it's time to watch your adult children make their way in the world. On this episode of The Parent …
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How We Can Be an Advocate to Our In-Law Adult Kids: Interview with Actor Taylor Upchurch
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Life used to be so simple. You grew up. Went to college. Got married. Bought a house. Raised your family. Worked for 30-40 years in the same place. Retired. Got a gold watch. Played golf until you died. We called it "The American Dream." Today - life looks VERY different and fitting into this mold is no longer possible for 90% of the population. Pi…
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When Your Anxiety Impacts Your Adult Child
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Anxiety and control go hand in hand to destroy relationships and often times we are unaware of how our anxiety impacts our relationships with our adult child(ren). On today's Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia reflect on what we can do to decrease our anxiety so that we can maintain healthy relationships and pivot well from parent to partner.…
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If you google, "How to deal with an antagonistic adult children," quora.com will tell you: Avoid them. They're grown. You have no control over them or their behavior. Focus on things you can control. Take good care of. yourself. Good thing you have The Parent Pivot Podcast to listen to! On this episode, Steve and Julia will help you pivot with your…
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Pivoting with Your In-Law Kids: Interview with Ashleigh Cummings
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Your son or daughter has just gotten married, or is about to. What does it look like to pivot from parent to partner with your new in-law kids? On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia sit down with their daughter-in-law, Ashleigh Cummings, for a transparent and insightful interview from her perspective on marrying into a differ…
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Pivoting well from parent to partner often times means taking a deeper look at things. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia tell us first-hand about the highly sensitive person and what that looks like to help us pivot well to being a partner. If your adult child is an HSP, and 20% of the population is, you won't want to mis…
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Reinventing the Relationship with Our Adult Children
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It was bound to happen sooner or later. We simply can't avoid it. Our kids grow up and become adults and soon we find ourselves in an "empty nest." Now what? For some couples, one can make the transition quickly and the other one struggles greatly. How can we approach this new season of life and really, the rest of our lives, and make it as enjoyab…
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Pivoting is never easy to do no matter what you're pivoting from and to. It takes intentionality, courage, stepping outside your normal mode of thinking, and seeing life from a different perspective. Pivoting from parent to partner with your adult children is no different. Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, "There is a time for everything, and a season for eve…
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What to Do With Your Kids Stuff When They Move On
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It happens to all of us at some time. Our kids become adults. Leave home. Get married. And all their stuff from childhood remains in our basements and garages. What does that have to do with pivoting from parent to partner? On this episode of The Parent Pivot podcast, we get an insight look at how Julia faced this recently and what this "emotional …
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Inside Steve's Story as a "Type A" Parent
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Are you considered a "Type A" personality? Maybe you have some of these common characteristics. You are: outgoing ambitious rigidly organized highly status-conscious impatient anxious proactive concerned with time management. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve opens up to share his story of being a "Type A Parent" and how he has bec…
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How Identity and Worth Ruin the Pivot from Parent to Partner
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It's very subtle and it can go undetected for years and wreak havoc on your relationship(s) with your adult child(ren). Becoming aware of it and the "why beneath the what" can propel you to a joy-filled life of being a healthy Partner. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia share their own story about how our identity and the …
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"What Do You Do When . . . ?": Steve & Julia Respond to a Loyal Listener's Situation
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Like anything we do in life, there can be an "art and a science" to it. Pivoting from Parent to Partner is no different. On today's episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia take the in-depth time to personally respond to a loyal listener who invited them into her pivot about her college grad daughter and some things that aren't quite tu…
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"Put the Spotlight on Me?" Wait. What??!! How does that help me pivot from a Parent to a Partner? Easy. Parenting was all about teaching our kids and instructing them on how to live a responsible life. PARTNERING is all about what is "caught, not taught." On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia show us how shifting the spotligh…
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Having Hard Conversations with Your Adult Child
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The pivot from Parent to Partner goes more smoothly when we "keep our mouths shut and the welcome mat out" - the main theme of Jim Burns' book and The Parent Pivot Podcast. Okay - but what is the balance between keeping our mouths shut - and dealing with our own emotions and resentment that pops up with our adult kids? On today's podcast, Steve and…
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Being Generous to Our Adult Children: How Much is Too Much?
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One dynamic that comes into play as we pivot from being a parent to a partner is: What is the balance between financially helping our adult child(ren) - and enabling them? Whether it's paying for college, a car, a down payment on a new home, or childcare for the grand babies, how much is too much? Especially when you aren't seeing any grateful hear…
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One Simple Step to Becoming a Better Partner in 2024
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Starting a new year can often be overwhelming making a list of "resolutions" to improve your life - like, eating better, exercising, or paying off debt. Where do you start? When it comes to pivoting from parenting to partnering with your adult children, Steve and Julia believe you can start 2024 with ONE simple step. Don't miss he next episode of T…
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2023 is over and here comes another year. Are you ready? What's in store in 2024? (Oh wow! . . . that rhymes!) Once again, coming at you in real time, Steve and Julia open the new year of The Parent Pivot Podcast with something they recently faced that caused them to look inward at themselves and how they are coming across to their adult children. …
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Becoming a Champion Partner to Your Adult Child(ren)
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In the Cummings' kitchen is a wooden plaque that says, "Simplify." We often get overwhelmed in life trying to balance, juggle, and learn new things. Don't you wish you could just simplify life more? On today's Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia help us simplify how we can focus on a few things on the road to becoming a champion partner to our ad…
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You've been there before. You're introduced to a group of people and you begin to feel a positive connection with one or two people - and soon you become fast friends. What is it that caused that to happen? On today's episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia show us how the "gravitational effect" can actually propel you to pivot much fa…
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31 Words That Will Change Your Family Trajectory for Generations
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“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.” Numbers 6:24-26 These verses from the Old Testament are known as "The Blessing" and are the focal point of this edition of The Parent Pivot Podcast. Steve and Julia share how it's not to late to change…
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What’s in a Name?: When Your Kids Have Kids
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So your kids are having a baby! You're going to be a grandparent! Whether it's your first or another in a long line, the baby showers, pregnancy checkups, and gender reveals dominate your days. All of it these events are memory makers that last a lifetime. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia zero in on one aspect of your gr…
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Hot Tip #45 for Growing Your Relationship with Your Adult Child
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Pivoting from Parent to Partner can be fun, impact others and develop a deeper connection with your adult child. It doesn't always have to be confrontational or stressful. There are some things you can do that will have a life long impact. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia show us how serving together with your adult chil…
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Hot Tip #44 to a Deeper Relationship with Your Adult Child: Speak Life
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Pivoting from parent to partner isn't easy. It's a road of what seems like constant change. But! . . . the intentional effort you put in, will reap a stronger, deeper and more healthy relationship with your adult children. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia show us how we can have a lasting legacy that will strengthen your…
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Holidays, Traditions and Change: How Do We Navigate This Season?
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The holidays are here and can be a LOT of stress as we try to negotiate the plans to be made when our adult kids are married. What do you do when you have traditions that have been going on for decades and now you have a new member of the family? How do we navigate this season when there are so many emotions pulling us in different directions? On t…
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How Addiction Can Bring You Closer to Your Adult Kids
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In every family tree, addiction can wreak havoc destroying family relationships for generations to come. The mere mention of the word, addiction, often strikes fear in our hearts. But, it doesn't have to be that way. On the this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia will show us how you can actually grow closer to your adult kids and…
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Tribe vs. Tribalism: What is the Difference and How Does That Help Us Pivot?
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Pivoting from being a parent to a partner requires an awareness of the difference between our tribes, and tribalism. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia show us what it means to care for our tribes as a partner, while pointing our the dangers of tribalism and how that impacts our relationships with our adult children. Conta…
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When our kids were little our #1 goal as parents was to raise responsible adults. Responsibility is a core value in raising kids, Amen?! When they become adults, one of the hardest things to do to pivot from a parent to a partner is to release responsibility. It's not easy. We want our kids to succeed in every sense of the word in life and when the…
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Achieving a Healthier Balance: Cultivating Emotional Maturity
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Pivoting is not easy. It never is. You have to be intentional to change your trajectory. When it comes to pivoting from being a parent to a partner, we need to start with us - Mom and Dad. What's the key to pivoting and becoming the healthy partner to your adult child? On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia walk us through way…
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When Your Adult Child is Hurting: What NOT to Do
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Football season is in full swing and you've likely seen a runner get stopped at the line of scrimmage and gang tackled to the ground. Five or six guys against one all piling on. What does that have to do with pivoting from a parent to a partner, you ask? On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia bring us some sound counsel on wha…
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The Secret to a Deeper Relationship with Your Adult Child
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We all do it. We mask up to protect our hearts from shame, judgment and criticism and it's all based on fear. The Enemy wins because we don't want anyone to know the real me. Guess what? That one dynamic prevents us from having a deeper relationship with our adult children. On this edition of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia openly share h…
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Multi-Generational Family Living Part 2: Interview with Jon & Cheri Talbert
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The "American Dream" our culture has sold us for generations is changing. Watching our adult children struggle to get sustaining jobs and buy a home is becoming increasingly harder to attain, multiple studies have shown. Aging parents to care for are also on the rise. Is there another option for families to survive in this world today? Steve and Ju…
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Multi-Generational Family Living Part 1: Interview with Jon & Cheri Talbert
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The American dream and landscape isn't what it used to be when Boomers got married. Multiple studies are now showing that our adult children are struggling with being able to buy a home. On the other end of the generational pendulum, elderly parents need a safe place to live when other options aren't viable. Maybe you find yourself in a similar lif…
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Have you ever noticed there's one essential ingredient missing in most of our relationships? And, Steve and Julia believe it's the single most important factor in order to pursue healthy relationships with our adult children. What is this powerful catalyst? On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia remind us as parent what life w…
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When Your Adult Child Cuts Off Relationship
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If your adult child has cut you out of his or her life—whether for a long or short time—it is a gut-wrenching experience. It often provokes deep feelings of shame, guilt, bewilderment, and hurt, all of which can easily turn to anger. On top of that, it can also arouse people’s worst suspicions ("Surely, the Smiths must be terrible parents for their…
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Looking Deeper Inside Ourselves to Becoming a Great Partner to Our Adult Kids
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Whether we realize it or not, or even BELIEVE it, shame can affect our relationships with our adult children. It seeks to destroy our identity as a parent and replace it with a damaged version of ourselves. The good news is: we don't have to continue to live this way. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia unpack how shame can…
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Pay It Forward If You Can: Creating a Legacy of Generosity
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Every day it seems it's getting harder and harder to make it in this world. If you have hard-working adult kids struggling to get sustainable jobs and housing, you're not alone. What can we do as partners to help them? On this edition of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia Cummings share their own story of being struggling newlyweds and havin…
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Summertime is a good time to watch a good movie and laugh with your mate. Sometimes laughing at other people can bring home some valuable messages to evaluate how you are doing. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia share about some recent events they went through, and how a popular movie they watched again can help you as a …
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”Why is This Taking SO Long?” - The Emerging Adult
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Many young adults today are in no hurry to grow up. They are meandering toward responsibility and life's most important decisions, while wearing t-shirts jokingly complaining about "adulting." Does that sound like your adult child? On this edition of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia shed some light on how you can come alongside your "emerg…
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It's bound to happen. Your adult child is hurt by something they see their grandparents do for their sibling and not for them. Do you get involved? Ignore it? Take sides? Explain it away? In yet another "real time" episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia walk through a situation that just happened that involved their adult child and th…
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You’re Not Responsible for Your Spouse’s Relationships
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Your husband's relationship with your adult child is heading south fast and causing tension in the family. Or maybe it's your wife's relationship. Your adult child comes to you because you're safe and now you're in the middle. Now what? If this resonates with you, you'll want to be sure to listen to this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast. Steve a…
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An estimated 2.7 million grandparents in the United States are taking the lead in raising their grandchildren. More than 6.1 million children under 18 live in their grandparents' households. On this episode of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Julia bring some helpful insights and counsel to help you have healthy partner relationships with your a…
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Pivoting from parent to partner requires intentional action. If you're reacting to your adult child all the time, chances are your relationship is struggling. It's only a matter of time before it completely fractures. What can we do in the moment when our heart is racing, our gut is tense and worry, anxiety and fear are overwhelming us? On this edi…
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Pivoting from parent to partner is hard enough on its own. But what happens if you have an adult child away at college, a high schooler at home, AND your elderly parent living with you? That a LOT to handle day in and day out. How do you navigate all of that when it can be so overwhelming? On this edition of The Parent Pivot Podcast, Steve and Juli…
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