Ep. 7 - Crossing the Bridge

Finding Forgiveness; a Family Fairy Tale

Today, I will share how my mother and I reconnected after our six year long estrangement. I don’t call it reconciliation because, as you will hear, we didn’t reconcile anything. My story still leaves questions in my mind as to what happened between us. Through therapy and diving deep into my thoughts and feelings, perhaps the answer is accepting there is no answer. Join me in hearing about how I crossed the bridge to forgiveness.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [0:00] Susan recaps what transpired, causing the estrangement between her and her mother.

• [3:00] Susan called her mother when she was in college. She also talks about going to therapy.

• [6:23] Susan reflects that the one person who can explain what happened died in 2021.

• [10:52] Susan reveals that she and her mother reconciled, and she visits her in West Virginia.

• [14:11] Susan commits to keeping the relationship going and finds a letter that is very revealing after her mother’s death, and she experiences forgiveness.

• [22:19] Susan encourages listeners to contact Susan if they want to share your story.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• [1:35] When your pain is too exhausting, sometimes a person can conjure up a different reality.

• [5:31] Getting help from a therapist is very helpful.

• [11:02] What happens to a relationship when there is no reconciliation?

QUOTES:

“Six years estranged from my mother, I went through my high school and college graduation and I started my first professional job, working full-time. After six years of not speaking to me, when I was at family functions, she would call, and she would talk to everybody there, except for me.” Susan Gibson

“It's all part of my family fairy tale. That's what forgiveness does for us. It permits us to let go of those things that no longer serve us. It's an important step in relationships you care about, deep relationships, deep in your heart, where you know that love and care are still there; it just may take a lot of time and energy to pull it out again, pull it out into the light, let those defenses down. And start defining a new relationship with this person.” Susan Gibson

RESOURCES:

Susan Gibson - Email

ABOUT THE HOST:

Susan Gibson grew up in a small town in Northern Maine, the only surviving child of parents who married young and divorced young. From the influence of their shared experiences, Susan has learned two things that are core to who she is: the value of community and the power of having a voice.

Susan has spent her entire academic and professional career as a woman in tech, starting her career as a developer in the mid-80s to today, where she is CEO of Temenos+Agility, a management consulting company she co-founded with her partner, Siraj Sirajuddin, where they help enterprises transform organizationally and personally, to find a more meaningful way to deliver value to their customers.

Susan is a frequent contributor to the Women in Tech (WiT) Regatta and speaks at public and private events around the world, using her voice to grow communities of women, mentors and allies in tech.

Susan has many lifelong pursuits - healthy eating, fitness, yoga & meditation, music, theater, opera, reading, movies, travel, family and friends. She is also rebuilding her family’s 110-year-old homestead in Northern Maine, a true labor of love.