Game of Thrones Fans - I Hear Ya! Bonus Episode on the Lost Art of Listening

In Happier News

I didn't watch the Game of Thrones finale, but I pretended I did and the lessons I learned as a result were incredible! What if we decided to just listen to someone and validate them instead of interjecting our opinions? Turns out, it makes for a very cool experience. Here's what happened to me... The day after the season finale of Game of Thrones May 20, 2019 I wore my Mother of Dragons shirt. I bought the shirt at Target and bought it for a Game of Throne party I went to for the season premiere. Our friends are super fans and threw the most amazing costume theme party for the premiere. We dressed Jade as a baby dragon at the party so it was only fitting for me to be the Mother of Dragons. That all said, we don’t watch Game of Thrones. I’ve seen 3 episodes total including the season premiere. Wearing the shirt meant people instantly wanted to talk to me about the season finale, which I didn’t see. At Stroller Strides that morning I told the other moms who asked what I thought that I just had the shirt but didn’t watch the show. We all agree that I should come up with a canned response for people who ask me about it, something like, “I just can’t believe it’s over.” Next I went to our Kombucha On Tap office where immediately an employee asked me what I thought about the ending. Again I laughed saying I didn’t know and then he helped me come up with a few more canned responses for when strangers asked me. Now I was prepared! That afternoon I went to the YMCA and was working on my laptop, earbuds in and all and a woman came running up to me and said, “as the mother of dragons can you BELIEVE what they did to your character?!” I looked up and said, “I just can’t believe it’s over!” In my head, I thought oh no...I don’t even know what happened to my character but I decided this was a great time to listen. She was disappointed by the ending and had three alternative endings she wished they had written instead. I simply listened, nodded and agreed with each one. She was so excited and it felt great to just give her that space to be excited. Normally I would be interjecting my opinions and perhaps even dominating the conversation. But without an opinion or any knowledge, I simply agreed and listened. At first I was scared she would call me out or think it was a dud of a conversation since I didn’t add anything to it. But instead, it was awesome. She felt validated, heard and empowered. After that I went to the grocery store where an employee said he loved my shirt and then immediately asked, “did you watch the finale?” I smiled and said, “yes!” A lie, which I hate doing, but this had turned into a social experiment for me. He got a huge smile and said, “bummer about your character! What did you think of the ending?” To which i stated, “I just can’t believe it’s over.” He replied, “good answer” validating me and then I asked him what he thought. He went into his theories and opinions to which I nodded and agreed to it all. It was another upbeat positive conversation even though I wasn’t adding anything to it besides validation. Regardless, I left feeling happy and he continued at work feeling happy. So rarely in life do we actually just listen and validate without giving our commentary. What a cool lesson I got to learn, all because of a shirt. About the host: Deanne Goodman is a journalist, mom, speaker and co-founder of Kombucha On Tap. Connect at InHappierNews.com