Join two sarcastic Trek nerds on an episode-by-episode journey through the Star Trek universe.
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Oops, We Killed The Pope (DS9 S1 : E13 "Battle Lines")
1:20:17
1:20:17
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When the local Bajoran quest giver decides to make a quick stop at the local DOOM level, absolutely nothing bad will happen as we review "Battle Lines". Sisko decides to take Kai Opaka out for a joyride, but things take a grim turn when they crash on planet Breaking Bad. I'm sure none of this will have consequences at all!…
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Star Trek commits its worst possible sin - being boring - as we review "Vortex". While we are happy to see an old guest star friend, it won't be long before we are talking about what is in our junk drawers. One thing though....is the Federation ever going to pass a law on menacing or are threats just a love language?…
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Ferengi Backstory? Inconceivable! (DS9 S1 :E11 "The Nagus")
56:31
56:31
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56:31
Another one of the part time hitters shows up into the DS9 roster as we review "The Nagus". When Wallace Shaw rolls in with his perfectly drippy makeup, Quark gets plaid for a stooge, Rom tries to murder someone and no one does anything, and Jake shows in Star Trek even teenage rebellion is wholesome.…
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The Lamest Escape Room (DS9 S1 : E10 "Move Along Home")
55:22
55:22
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55:22
The bottom comes for us quickly as we review DS9's most ill-regarded entry, "Move Along Home"! When the finest white trash of the Gamma Quad roll in with their TNG S1 outfits and mullets, we find ourselves agreeing with Ron Moore ... did everyone lose their minds when they made this?
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The D Stands For Daddy Issues (TNG S6 : E16 "Birthright, Part 1)
1:04:31
1:04:31
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1:04:31
It's side missions all around for podcasters and flagship bridge officers as we review "Birthright, Part 1"! Staying true to our word to review every episode that takes place on DS9, the crew of The Mighty D pulls in to clear out the quest log. Will Data learn to dream? How many felonies will Worf commit on the station in front of witnesses? Listen…
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Evil Talks Slow (DS9 S1 : E9 "The Passenger")
59:13
59:13
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59:13
Nothing like a Turbo Evil Space. Dr. Mengele to spice up life on the frontier as we review "The Passenger". When the new Extremely Bad Guy does a little brain melding via choke, it's a grand time of overacting, poorly hidden identities, sudden executions, and ...brain surgery via transporter?
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Sorry I Boinked Your Mom (DS9 S1 :E9 "Dax")
1:11:26
1:11:26
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1:11:26
Nothing like a touch of that courtroom drama action to get to know all your new characters as we review "Dax"! There is a a cavalcade of veteran Trek guest actors as we get all the detail you may (or may not) have wanted about Dax's boinking both past and present, Detective Odo makes his firm debut, and the plot ends in the strangest way possible.…
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No Place For a Q (DS9 S1 : E7 "Q Less")
1:03:06
1:03:06
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The galactic tourist you never want to see drops in as we review "Q Less"! When Enterprise-D's best known homewrecker Vash is found in the Gamma Quad, some fun capitalism breaks out at Quark's, the big glowy thing is the problem, and Q is just there to make fun of the Starfleet JV squad. JOIN US ON DISCORD: https://discord.gg/dBy4EmFaHJ…
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Rules are for Officers (DS9 S1 : E6 "Captive Pursuit")
59:51
59:51
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59:51
The true Hero of the Working Man makes a friend as we review "Captive Pursuit"! In a future where every copy of "The Most Dangerous Game" was destroyed, Chief O'Brien and his new Gamma Quad drinking buddy engage in a bit of light murder, but are the real criminals the costume department?
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A Little Early for Space Gibberish (DS9 S1 : E5 "Babel")
59:47
59:47
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59:47
Comedy! Review! Star Trek! Sometimes we also say random words with no connection as we take a look at "Babel"! The Chief gets a case of the weird talkies, Quark gets out his junk drawer of security hacks, and eventually the answer gets volun-told only the way Kira could.
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Honey, I Cloned an Ex-Con! (DS9 S1 : E4 "A Man Alone")
1:02:28
1:02:28
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When Odo runs into his least favorite war profiteering jabroni, his sudden case of getting murdered turns up a while meadow of whoopsie daisies in "A Man Alone." Not only does a very evil bit actor gins up a lynch mob, and somehow this overshadows Bashir straight up accidentally cloning a guy!
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Plain, Simple Garak (DS9 S1 : E3 "Past Prologue")
1:01:58
1:01:58
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Nothing like the introduction to Trek's best 'humble tailor' to spice up our review of DS9's second episode, "Past Prologue". As local medical doofus Bashir gets hand held through his first bit of tradecraft, the best four best parts of the Klingon Empire show up and Kira learns that its never a good idea to try and outflank your boss.…
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This Old Caradassian Deathtrap (DS9 S1:E1/2 "Emissary")
1:51:13
1:51:13
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1:51:13
At last, your favorite Star Trek podcast arrives at the shady port of call you have all been waiting for as V'Ger Please enters the Deep Space Nine era! Come along with us as we review "Emissary" where Commander Sisko has the worst employee orientation ever, magic orbs are immediately handed out, and the most consequential space hole of all time co…
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Hasperat Homework (DS9 Prep Episode)
1:30:59
1:30:59
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1:30:59
Your hosts get ready to complete their PhD in Trek by going back to the classic texts in our official Deep Space Nine prep episode! Joseph and Peter review several key TNG episodes - "The Wounded", "Ensign Ro", "Chain of Command", and "Preemptive Strike" - to refresh themselves on key continuity and characters, and get more than a little lost remin…
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VOY's Deepest Cuts (ST: Lower Decks "Twovix" Review)
1:05:22
1:05:22
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Sometimes, the universe sees fit to make something for a VERY specific group of people, and that day came when we watched the Lower Decks episode "Twovix"! Your hosts demand peak performance as they rate every single Voyager joke and reference for quality and accuracy, reflect on Lower Decks as a whole, and wonder if maybe - just maybe - someone so…
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Hell is Real ( Event Horizon Review)
1:23:40
1:23:40
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From our Patreon vault comes a review of one of the most underappreciated sci-fi/horror films ever made and personal favorite of both your hosts - 1997's "Event Horizon"! With Joseph and Peter VERY AWARE of tropes around portals to Hell, we dive deep on a movie with vision and ambition that is sorely missing in today's Hollywood offerings. Please e…
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As was foretold, we have arrived at the end of the Heinous Trip at Warp 5 and now set the whole of Enterprise into it's deserved grave! What was the best? The worst? Was this show late breaking competence enough to make it worth watching at all? We dive deep as we always do to answer the tough question. Listen and enjoy!…
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It's that magical time yet again as we reach the end of another Trek season and hand out all our awards for the Enterprise Season 4 RIP! This was a fantastic season of Trek, but we still have lists of the best things, the worst things, the OSHA violations, and so much more! Check it out!
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A Circus of Disservice (ENT S4 : E22)
1:06:25
1:06:25
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We enter the times that try men's souls as we review the most unfortunate series finale in Trek history as we review the infamous "These Are The Voyages...". That said...is it really as bad as everyone's says? yeah Trip gets the worst death scene of all time. Sure, the premise only makes a limited amount of sense. But....the worst Trek episode of a…
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Interview with Tom Salinsky (Author of "Star Trek: Discovering the TV Series")
57:38
57:38
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57:38
It turns out Peter and Joseph are *not* the only nerds watching Trek and sharing their thoughts about it online! From across the pond we interview actor and author Tom Salinsky on his new book "Star Trek: Discovering the TV Series", wherein Tom documents his first own Trek thoughts and reviews. We dig deep on all the big questions: How did British …
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Truth, Justice, and Lanyards for All (ENT S4 : E21)
1:29:36
1:29:36
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The true series finale of Enterprise is here as we review "Terra Prime"! Everyone has plot as RoboCop tries to stay winning,Trip gets the head wounds, Hoshi finally commands, Reed returns to Gotham, and Archer takes until the last second to pull off a Classic Captain's Speech Check. There are no Enterprise episodes after this! No sir! What a satisf…
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The RoboCop Supremacy (ENT S4 : E20)
1:30:10
1:30:10
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1:30:10
The true grand finale of Enterprise begins as we review "Demons"! It's nothing but jam packed excellence as Peter Weller does the best bad guy monologues, Travis gets laid, and Trip and T'Pol attempt the most ill-advised infiltration of all time!
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Putting the 'Ho' in 'Hoshi' (ENT S4 : E19)
1:06:16
1:06:16
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It's all fun and games until its time for the hallway knife fights as we review "In the Mirror, Darkly Part 2"! We get more of everything we loved - abs, Simon Mayweather Phoenix, awesome TOS sets, Mirror Universe scene chewing, more abs, you name it! We also get more of Archer being an evil dweeb, but at least he evaporates a guy!…
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The Mirror Into Awesomeness (ENT S4 : E18)
1:07:56
1:07:56
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1:07:56
We arrive at what are likely the most famous and best regarded Enterprise episodes as we at last review "In A Mirror, Darkly"! We have our good pal Ian bust out a whole know theme song for the occasion as we hit all the highlights. For no particular reason we get the awesome nasty versions of our heroes, Jolene's abs getting their moment in the sun…
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Hot Orion Slave Girls (ENT S4 : E17)
1:06:19
1:06:19
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We are warping right into the Red Light District as we review the very peak Sexy Alien Lady tropes as we review "Bound"! When The NX-01 gets back to doing random space stuff one last time, Archer runs into the very finest Space Hottie train in all the galaxy. Turns out it's a pretty cool episode about how Orion women use overwhelming sexual power t…
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It's a densely packed hour over here as we review "Divergence"! This one has it all - maybe too much - as Trip has to jump trains to restart the router, Phlox decided to bioweapon everyone, Archer shows up to get juiced on Klingon super blood, AND STILL MORE! We also start to have the conversation every Trek fan must - what is with this Section 31 …
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Nonchalant Psychic Connections (ENT S4 : E15 PART 2)
1:00:53
1:00:53
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What is hopefully your favorite podcast talks about a lot of things this week, because we only had the second half of "Affliction"to go over. Great episode, Reed is somehow interesting for a change, the Trip/T'Pol gets real weird real fast, bust mostly we ramble about Deus Ex, Voyager episodes, and even AI a little bit. Give it a listen!…
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The boys take their time with quality as we review the first half of "Affliction"! This week, we reflect on Gary Graham (RIP) and his Trek contributions, the retro-continuity to fix a Voltaire lyric turning into solid gold, James Avery being the best guest star, and Phlox being incredulous for all of us.…
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Going for the F Mission Score (ENT S4 : E14)
1:01:02
1:01:02
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1:01:02
Come enjoy Andoria in summer as we review "The Aenar"! Jeff Combs gives us one last taste of Shran greatness as he and Archer go on a zany funhouse adventure, the Romulan Primogen tries to set a record for L's, and Trip has a case of the sad boi.
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The political intrigue and ritualistic knife fighting heats up as we review "United"! When Archer tries to get everyone to act like adults so they can deal with the Romulan CIA Drones, Shran goes full goblin mode, Travis has hidden talents, and we manage not to hate Reed (for once).
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The Adventures of Mr. Business (ENT S4 : E12)
1:15:45
1:15:45
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It's the shifty antagonists you always need to have show up eventually as we review "Babel One"! When the Romulan/Brujah Primogen starts drone striking a few too many weddings, can Archer make his Diplomacy skill check? Meanwhile, we also review "Godzilla Minus One" and ask if you want us to review....Kindred: The Embraced?…
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We review the alpha and the omega of bottle episodes in the form of "Observer Effect"! The producers remember they should probably have Hoshi and Mayweather do some things while the save every dollar they can. Thankfully, it turns out a lot of good actors work on this show!
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Moops, I Turned My Son Into a Transporter Demon! (ENT S4 : E10)
1:10:49
1:10:49
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It's the episode straight from Peter's darkest industrial accident dreams as we review "Daedalus"! When the Enterprise has on-board the creator of the transporter, horrifying hyjinks ensue as ensigns lose their face, the transporter is confirmed for being a soul elimination device, and the main guest star forgot how to act.…
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Tom Clancy's Raptor's Gambit (ENT S4 : E9)
57:58
57:58
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57:58
Nothing like a little torture between friends as we review "Kir'Shara". When Jeffery Combs shows up, you know it's the good stuff as Shran and Soval have some personal time, Archer and T'Pol put on a sweet holographic display, and Koss comes through as too good for his wife anyway.
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Tom Clancy's High Command (ENT S4 : E8)
1:00:08
1:00:08
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The political intrigue only gets more complex as we review "Awakening"! While Archer achieves levels of head trauma no human could dream of as Vulcan Jesus chills out in his brain, Trip tries not to moops his way into interstellar war and Vulcans are blind to hallways.
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This mid science fiction show we were watching suddenly turns into a tight political thriller as we review "The Forge". All those promises to Peter for the good Vulcan content pays off in spades as the Earth embassy gets bomber by Detective Guilty and Archer is on the case!
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Farwell Rick Soongchez (ENT S4 : E6)
1:11:38
1:11:38
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1:11:38
We finally manage to do a whole Season 4 episode in one go as we review "The Augments"! It's tragic endings all around as we get more jailbreaks, Adam Smasher going full madman, and the most uncomfortable bedroom scene in Trek history.
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When the Coworker Murder Isn't Simulated (ENT S4 : E5 PART 2)
56:52
56:52
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56:52
We enjoy everyone going into Maximum Actor Mode as we finish our review of "Cold Station 12". Compelling drama swirls around us as we see the Nerfed MACOs get punked again, Dr. Soongchez realizes he goofed, and Archer tries to get himself killed twice.
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Phlox's Best Friend With Benefits (ENT S4 : E5 PART 1)
54:39
54:39
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54:39
Your hosts continue to explore the depths of every moment of this suddenly high quality television program as we start our review of "Cold Station 12"! Between the high stakes drama and careful plotting there is very little to criticize, but it does beg one clear question - could have the early 2000's handled Bisexual Phlox?…
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Archer Morty and Dr. Rick Soong (ENT S4 : E4 PART2)
48:33
48:33
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48:33
We try to use all the Enterprise Season 4 buffalo as we review the second half of "Borderlands"! We get multiple classic jailbreaks, MACOS getting hit with a nerf patch, and Mayweather denied greatness.
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Augumented Wushu Overactors (ENT S4 : E4 PART1)
55:23
55:23
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55:23
We go deep on the forbidden lore as your heroes discuss the first half of "Borderlands"! An episode so rich with content we had to split our discussion up into two parts, we get the Rick Sanchez arc of the Soong family, Big Show giving airplane rides, and how to make sense of old TOS continuity from the 60's.…
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Home Is Where The Trauma Is (ENT S4 : E3)
1:14:44
1:14:44
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With all that German side plot out of the way, the season really starts as we watch "Home". Everybody has a bad time when the NX-01 returns - we got PTSD, angry drunks, last-second weddings, and Mayweather showing that he is all you ever need to bring to a bar fight.
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Things get a lot worse as we wrap up the NX-01's prior season Quest Log as we review "Storm Front, Part 2"! The writers can't get of the Temporal Cold War fast enough as we straight speed run to the finish, spawn camp some Germans, and get back to the plot we actually want to see.
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We fly into Enterprise's final season with an episode filled with all the C&C Red Alert cutscenes you never saw in "Storm Front"! Just when they thought they earned a rest, the NX-01 faces a Time Zucc oopsie, powerleveled Germans in New York, and a special guest star from another UPN show.
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The Power of All That D (PIC S3 : E9-10)
2:17:45
2:17:45
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We reach the awesome, if inevitable, conclusion as the last TNG character returns for the thrilling Picard S3 finale! We review Episodes 9 -10, Peter has a single tear form in his eye as the Big Bad Galaxy Class Lad returns, and the crew has a final adventure that uses all the memberberries...and we like it!…
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Jedi Worf Dreams of Deanna (PIC S3 : E5-8)
1:54:07
1:54:07
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Our nostalgic, high-quality final journey with the TNG crew continues as we review Picard S3 Episodes 5-8! It's time to put the band back together while the Titan is on the run, we thankfully start getting a lot less of Michelle Hurd, and we should all be so lucky to get those sweet Old Age Jackets to slim us on camera.…
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The Last Second Hail Mary Play (PIC S3 :E1-4)
2:24:11
2:24:11
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In this year's most unexpected plot twist, Joseph and Peter watch and real time as Terry Matalas saved Star Trek: Picard from it's garbage fate with it's excellent Season 3! In the first of our trilogy of reviews, we cover Episodes 1-4 and revel in the most rare find of all: good NuTrek.
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With the Xindi arc now (mostly) behind us, Peter and Joseph review the season-that-was of Enterprise! Season 3 was a banger as predicted, but what made it work so well? What could be improved? Why did they make 'Extinction'? What was the weakest you-know what? Listen and find out!
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The Battle of Body Count Bridge (ENT S3 : E24)
1:23:21
1:23:21
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Earth faces the worst OSHA violation in the galaxy as we watch the thrilling "Zero Hour"! We have shootouts, uncomfortable skin makeup, Mortal Kombat fights, and Best Frenemies showing up with the steel chair! Maybe...too much.
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Hoshi's Bad Day At Work (ENT S3 :E23)
1:03:36
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It's all hands on deck as we review Season 3's penultimate offering, "Countdown"! Hoshi has a Very Bad Time with her new friends, Diplomat Archer continues to emerge, Major Hayes is two weeks from retirement, and we realize Smouldering Catcher Guy isn't gone...because he has been with us all season.
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