From her TikTok and Instagram, @findingmrheight, dating coach Ali Jackson is joined by friend & stand up comedian Erica Spera (@spericaa) to bring you their positive and practical dating approach in podcast form. Their straightforward attitudes, often with some humor on the side, will help you tackle modern dating issues while building confidence and staying authentic to your true self. Follow along @findingmrheight for even more content!
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1. Ali Gatie - Crying In The Rain 2. Alice Auer - Maybe I Know You 3. Eliana porter (feat. Izk Jenkins) - Survive 4. Bee-B & Raheem Devaughn- Can We 5. A.Miche - Can't Find The Words 6. Savannah Cristina - Walk it Out 7. Destin Conrad - Unpredicatable feat. Kiana Ledé 8. Enchanting - Take It Back 9. Janay Anita Batchelor - Still Down For You 10. Muni Long - Pain 11. PJ Morton, Kaleb J & Passion Vibe - Please Don't Walk Away (Remix) 12. Brianna Knight - Bad Decisions 13. Miss Keys - Left Me I ...
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184. The ShrinkChicks One ft. Jennifer Chaiken & Emmalee Bierly
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Erica & Ali could not HELP but let this interview with ShrinkChicks (aka Jennifer Chaiken, LMFT & Emmalee Bierly, LMFT) run a bit long because, y’all, it is incredible. The foursome starts off discussing how difficult it can be to find a therapist and offer some advice for navigating that journey. Then, we move into our most popular listener submis…
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Erica & Ali are back answering your questions in a Hot Topics episode this week! We counsel a listener who is nervous about having sex for the first time. Then, a listener is struggling with a guy who’s chronically late and recently stood her up. Third, Erica gives advice on navigating a herpes disclosure in your relationship. And finally, a listen…
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We’re back with another debate team episode, where Ali & Erica debate topics submitted by our listeners! We’ve got four topics up for debate this week. Let us know where you stand! Marathon dates early in the game - yay or nay? Is it okay to be late for a date? Can you date someone you work with? And finally, should you go ring shopping with your p…
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181. The Emotionally Online One ft. Maddie Dragsbaek
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Straight from your guest suggestions, we have Maddie Dragsbaek, host of the Emotionally Online podcast, in an amazing episode this week! Maddie has been opening up about her life online since before podcasts were a thing and this week is no exception. Our conversation focuses first on her bisexuality - what exploring that both privately and publicl…
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Erica & Ali have so many updates to share this week that we did an episode full of them (plus a lot of girl talk in between)! Erica is fresh off her third date with Tony Soprano and is on the fence about a fourth (until she accidentally pushes herself off). The gals get into a great discussion about the frustration of someone being “good on paper” …
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179. The Attachment Solution One ft. Charisse Cooke
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Psychotherapist Charisse Cooke is back on the pod this week and Erica & Ali could have talked to her for hours! Our conversation focuses on attachment theory, answering listener questions such as how to self soothe an anxious attachment, best strategies for navigating an anxious/avoidant dynamic, and why avoidant attachment gets such a bad rap. In …
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178. The Cheating One ft. Chloe Radcliffe
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We hear about cheating a lot, but it’s rarely from the perspective of the person who does the cheating. This week, standup comedian Chloe Radcliffe opens up about her pattern of cheating (which she wrote a solo show about!). We dive into her thoughts on the origins of cheating, what she’s learned from her pattern and is applying in her new relation…
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We had so much fun talking about our past beliefs the other week that we’re bringing it back for a series including your submissions! We discuss submissions such as “your person will complete you,” “trying hard isn’t cool,” and “you should share many common hobbies with your partner.” Let us know if you like this series and submit more of your past…
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176. Storytime: Dating With Depression
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Ali & Erica are joined this week by Kelly, a listener who wrote in to share her story about dating with depression & anxiety. Kelly shares her journey towards getting diagnosed, how depression impacted her dating, & what growing in her first serious relationship has been like. It’s a powerful, relatable story that we can’t wait to share. But first,…
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We asked for your submissions about dating philosophies or “rules” you used to believe, but don’t anymore, and WOW did you deliver! So much so that we’ll be continuing this topic in future episodes. We’re starting this week with things that Ali & Erica used to believe, but don’t anymore, such as: when you know you know, men should ask women out for…
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We’re debuting a new segment on the pod this week…Debate Team! Ali & Erica will each be assigned a side of a debate and debate each other. This week, we’re starting with “should you live together before getting engaged?” and “can you be friends with an ex?” It gets especially fun when we have to argue for the side we don’t actually agree with! But …
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173. The Date Brazen One ft. Lily Womble
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Erica & Ali welcome feminist dating coach and debut author Lily Womble to the pod this week! We chat about bringing more joy into your dating life, how to narrow down your search to what Lily calls essences-based preferences, and how to reframe your mindset when you feel like you’re “too much.” Order Lily’s book, Thank You More Please, out June 11t…
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It’s a slightly new Hot Topics format, with both listener questions and a couple AITA situations. First, Ali & Erica debate if a man is the a-hole for not helping his wife carry things in from the car and whether a women is the a-hole for not giving up her comfy coffee shop chair. Then, we answer two listener questions: one listener who is concerne…
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We asked for feedback and you delivered!! This week, Ali & Erica are going through the biggest takeaways and themes from our podcast survey and previewing what’s to come for the future of the pod. We dig deep on our own opportunities for growth, taking into account both what the listeners shared as well as our own reflections. It’s a vulnerable con…
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170. The Second Therapy Jeff One ft. Jeff Guenther
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Back by popular demand, Therapy Jeff (aka Jeff Guenther, LPC) is on the pod answering your burning questions. We dive into topics such as: what does it mean if I attract emotionally available people? How to approach pre-marital counseling? What does it mean to “settle” and how do I know if I am? As always, Jeff’s advice is on point with some laughs…
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Erica & Ali are getting deep this week, going through all sorts of questions you can use to connect on first dates, in early dating, or even when already in a relationship. We’re answering our favorite ones plus listing a few you probably shouldn’t ask. Let’s start having some more interesting conversations! In Updates, Erica meets a new man (or is…
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168. The A Little Nudge One ft. Erika Ettin
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Erica & Ali are diving into the apps with dating coach & app expert Erika Ettin of @alittlenudge. We talk about whether it really matters what opener you send (hint: YES), how to deal with dating app burnout, and why Erika recommends dating NATO (not attached to outcome). But first, Erica is back from a rejuvenating Bachelorette weekend while Ali h…
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Erica & Ali are bouncing around in a roundup episode this week, chatting about recent dating-related news items. First, we have some updates from last week’s ep! Then, we dive into the risks of buying a house with someone you’re not married to (Tom & Ariana, anyone?) and discuss why dating apps have been on a downswing. Erica has a “friendly” updat…
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166. The Female Friendships One ft. Danielle Bayard Jackson
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Ali & Erica are back for another episode about friendship, featuring incredible friendship coach, Danielle Bayard Jackson! Danielle’s upcoming book, Fighting for Our Friendships, is all about the science behind women’s relationships and she brings us SO much knowledge: from deepening your bond with an acquaintance, to the influence our friends have…
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Ali & Erica have a first date guide for you this week! We’re breaking down everything you need to know: getting from dating app convo to date, pre-date texting guidelines, first date arrival logistics, conversation tips to avoid and awkwardness, and so much more. In Updates, Erica finds out why people call LA “Flake City” as she prepares for multip…
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Have you ever gotten the ick from a match or a date? Ali & Erica have rounded up all sorts of icks from the listeners and we’re debating them on this week’s episode. It’s a fun and silly one this week! In Updates, Ali goes on a thoughtful fourth date with Mr. Worldwide. Meanwhile, Erica is excited to be back in LA for a while, making swiping easier…
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163. The Pretty Much Done One ft. Julia Mazur
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Have you ever considered picking up and moving to a new city? Julia Mazur, host of the Pretty Much Done podcast, did just that. Having spent her whole life in Los Angeles, she moved to Austin after a break up and has never been happier. And, in addition, to her move, we get into a great discussion about hyper-independence and how it can affect rela…
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Ali & Erica are back with questions submitted by you, the listeners! We start with the age-old question: should you give a ghost a second chance? Then, a listener has a crush at work - how can she get this man on a date? Or should she give up? And lastly, we advise a listener who is about to visit a long-distance situationship. But first, Ali has q…
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161. The Ask A Matchmaker One ft. Maria Avgitidis
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Your calls have been answered…Matchmaker Maria is back on the pod!! We’re answering all sorts of listener questions, Ask A Matchmaker style. For example: how do you balance a hoe phase with dating intentionally? What should you learn about someone before sleeping with them? And so much more… In Updates, Ali has an awesome first date with Mr. Worldw…
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How do people meet IRL these days?! Are there things we can be doing, places we can going, openers we can be using to make it all feel easier? This week, Ali & Erica are breaking down their best tips on meeting people “in the wild” plus sharing some of yours. We cover everything from body language when you’re out alone to opening lines for a cute s…
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159. The Hello Hayes One ft. Alexandra Hayes
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Ali & Erica are welcoming an advice column legend to the pod this week…it’s Hello Hayes, answering all your questions about friendships! We start by diving into her Six Besties Theory and then get to your questions - ranging from navigating a friendship breakup to feeling like the odd one out in your friend group. In Updates, the girls report back …
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Dating apps getting sued? Financial columnist scammed out of $50k? Ali & Erica reading a book about manifesting? We’re rounding up the week’s most unbelievable stories on this week’s episode. Tune in for our (non-lawyer) verdicts on the dating app case, our advice for future scam attempts, and the kickoff to the next few weeks of attempting to mani…
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Ali & Erica are answering your questions this week! First, a listener worries she’s slipping into a FWB situation. Next, we give advice for letting someone know you’re newly single (hint: do not use the company Slack). Next, a listener wonders why her first dates keep getting “friends only” vibes from her - is she doing something wrong? And lastly,…
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156. The Third Fertility One ft. Jordana Abraham
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Ali & Erica are continuing our fertility series with a third installment this week, welcoming Jordana Abraham back to the pod. In this deeply vulnerable episode, Jordana opens up about her fertility journey navigating pregnancy loss and the IVF process. We discuss the emotional toll this has taken and how she’s handled each step along the way. In U…
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Ali & Erica are starting a long-awaited series, race and dating, and we kick things off as Erica interviews Ali about her experiences as a multiracial woman. Ali relates what it was like growing up in mostly-white spaces, how that impacted her world (and self) view, and ultimately her dating life. We look forward to more episodes in the future digg…
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154. The F The Fairytale One ft. Damona Hoffman
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Ali & Erica welcome an OG of dating advice to the pod this week - Damona Hoffman, author of the new book “F The Fairytale” and host of the Dates & Mates podcast. We get into topics such as Damona’s best tips for dating mindset, how the online dating landscape has changed in her 15 years of coaching, and how race has played a role in her own dating …
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153. The Fifth Ask A 30-Something Man One
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Ali & Erica are joined by Zach, a 30-something man whose friends are managing his Hinge profile. We talk about how (and why) this arrangement came to be plus what he’s learned from having someone else set up his dates. And, has it been a success? Listen and find out! But first, Erica and Ali continue to update on outcomes from Dating App Sunday. In…
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Should firstborns always date lastborns? Are lastborn-lastborn relationships doomed? Or does it even matter? We’re finding out in this week’s episode, using research from around the web plus listener experiences (and our own!). Plus, a listener calls in with a PSA about gift card scams. In Updates, Ali & Erica both swung for the fences on Dating Ap…
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Ali & Erica are answering your questions in a Hot Topics episode this week! First, a listener has a crush on a friend of a friend…does he like her back? Second, a listener wonders how to know if she’s experiencing the slow burn or just a lack of attraction. Lastly, a listener runs into an ex while on a date. Should she reach out? In Updates, Erica …
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Ali & Erica are reviewing the first dating book Ali ever read (15 years ago!!) this week - Have Him At Hello by Rachel Greenwald. The author interviewed 1,000 men about why they didn’t want second dates and we’re debating how her findings apply to modern dating. Ali & Erica both identify (mostly) with The Boss Lady…how about you? In Updates, Ali & …
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149. The Masculinity One ft. Rachel Sievers, M.S.
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What is masculinity, anyway? How can you identify someone with healthy masculinity? How about someone who wants to equitably divide the mental load of a relationship? Rachel Sievers, M.S. - retired psychotherapist and host of The Answer To Everything Podcast - is here to help. In Updates, Erica gets set up from an unexpected place and Ali goes on a…
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148. The Smart Dating One ft. Bela Gandhi
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Bela Gandhi, dating coach and founder of Smart Dating Academy, joins us this week to answer your questions! Tune in to find out why she insists her clients do video dates before IRL dates, one of the steps in her tried and true method to help her clients find partnership, particularly later in life or after divorce. In Updates, Ali may have discove…
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How did 2023 go for us? We’re breaking it down this week. How many first dates did we go on? What lessons did we learn? And did we succeed at “more kissing, less crying”?? Plus, we’re sharing what you, the listeners, learned this year. In updates, Ali is feeling meh about seeing Billy Joel again and the ladies announce their next NYC live show on S…
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In honor of our recently-launched mother/daughter trip to Portugal, Ali & Erica have invited their moms on the show! We’re answering your questions: everything from who our moms think we should date to their best tips for lasting relationships. Get a glimpse into our relationships before the trip and learn more about the itinerary at the links in e…
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145. The Gifts For Men One ft. Sebastian Conelli & Robbie Nunes
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It’s that time of year where we all agonize over what to get the men in our lives, whether they’re partners, brothers, sons, or friends. So Ali & Erica sat down with Sebastian Conelli & Robbie Nunes, co-hosts of the Loud About Nothing podcast, to talk gifts. The four of us reveal the best (and worst) gifts we’ve ever gotten plus brainstorm ideas fo…
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Are you too picky? Ali & Erica aim to find out this week as we dive into a book that regularly makes the rounds on social media: "Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough" by Lori Gottlieb. We discuss things that used to be dealbreakers but aren’t any more, whether women need to “settle” more, and how we each navigate our preferences in…
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143. The Waiting for Marriage One ft. Paul Schissler
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Are you waiting for marriage? Or just curious what dating is like for someone who is? Comedian (and Erica’s former roommate - literally, ROOMmate) Paul Schissler joins us to chat about his journey doing just that. We answer listener questions ranging from when to divulge to people you’re dating to how to ensure you’re on the same page with what pos…
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Have you ever thought that your city is the worst for dating? Turns out most of our listeners do…so Ali & Erica are putting that to the test this week. We’re “traveling” to different cities in our dating apps and reporting back on our findings - plus sharing feedback from the listeners! Did we skip your city? Let us know at findingmrheight.com/podc…
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141. The Second Fertility One ft Dr. Peter Klatsky
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We’re back with the second installment of our fertility series, interviewing a very special guest - Erica’s doctor at Spring Fertility, Dr. Peter Klatsky! We start out by busting a few fertility myths and then get into questions from our listeners! Dr. Klatsky advises us on selecting a fertility provider, pulls back the curtain on egg freezing stat…
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Ali & Erica are taking listener questions (and bring back Weird or Nah!) in this week’s Hot Topics episode. First, we debate a listener’s screenshot dilemma and discuss setting boundaries in early dating. Then, we discuss how (or if) to tell a friend you think she’s settling. And finally, a listener writes in for advice on working with her ex who i…
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139. The UnF*ck Your Brain One ft. Kara Loewentheil
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Are you supervising your brain? Do you even know how? Kara Loewentheil, J.D., Master Certified Coach, and host of the UnF*ck Your Brain podcast is here to help. On this week’s episode, we explore topics of anxiety, particularly in the bedroom, and how to navigate through them. Kara explains how she worked to re-train her thoughts and we dive into h…
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138. The Life Coach One ft. Rachelle Indra
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Are you skeptical about life coaches? Rachelle Indra, who literally is one herself, was too! Ali & Erica are truly enthralled by her insights this week, so much so that we actually had to FORCE ourselves to end the interview. In particular, we dive deep into moving through heartbreak & healing going into a new relationship. We also touch on balanci…
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What do men wish women knew about them?? Well, we asked them for you (and pulled even more insights from around the internet). We hear about things like: avoiding subtlety/hints, how men don’t want to keep chasing you, and gosh darnit it’s nice to be the little spoon sometimes! But first, The Drummer’s performance does not live up to Erica’s expect…
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136. The City Confessions One ft. Mariann Yip
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Have you wondered what the transition is like from single and dating to being in a relationship? Author and lifestyle blogger Mariann Yip is telling Ali & Erica all about how she went from publishing a book about her NYC dating life to starting a family…all within a year! We chat about first dates, feeling lonely in parenthood, and letting go of wh…
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Ali & Erica are taking rapid fire listener questions this week in the latest Grab Bag episode! Topics range from defining “exclusive” vs “official,” determining if someone is ready to date, setting boundaries with advice from friends, to ending a date. In updates, Ali is crushing her IRL activities challenge (but hasn’t forgotten about the apps!) a…
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