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Fire the Canon

Rachel, Jackie, Bekah

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Prefer your books in comedy form, but still want to sound smart at parties? We got you. Discover the hilarity hidden in the classics with new episodes every other Thursday.
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The Launch Sequence

The Dream Job Factory

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The Launch Sequence is the official podcast of The Dream Job Factory. In it, we take parents through the journey of trying to help their children make the transition not only from student to productive member of society, but also into a career that they will enjoy. Listen to host Bill Priestley, founder of The Dream Job Blueprint, as he takes parents through that process of how the relationship between parent and child changes over time and how parents can give their children the best possib ...
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On each episode of Indy's Garage we'll talk to an owner of a vehicle that we have customized and discuss the process and details of that transformation. From factory to fantastic...from dream car to reality! We service all makes and models and no job is to big or to small. So come check us out!
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We're back with the second half of our over-the-top bio of EAP! Listen in for the story of Edgar's adulthood, complete with choleric escapades, omens from outer space, a cringeworthy misplaced accusation of plagiarism, a new love (now 100% child-free!) and a mysterious death followed by a funeral shorter than the song "Get Ur Freak On" by Missy Ell…
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Grab your raven, tuck your buddy’s heart under a floorboard, pour yourself a glass of Amontillado, and join us as we talk about the first half-ish of the life of Edgar Allan Poe, a man who didn’t ask to be born. It’s time to start warming up for spooky season 2025, and what better way than learning about one of America’s original Goths? Jackie goes…
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(Happy Thursday! That’s right, it’s Thursday. Don’t check.) Wow! A podcast! That’s the feeling you should get from this episode. Y’all… those crazy Athenian kids are still stuck in the dang woods. Will Puck, Oberon, and Titania continue messing with the humans and each other? Will Bottom regain his human form? Will the love triangles ever get resol…
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We’re back, with Shakespeare’s comedy classic, A Midsummer Night’s Dream! Basically, four young Athenians with romance problems wander into the woods and get messed with by a bunch of fairies - you know the drill. It’s a good time, you’ll love it. (Fun fact: Jackie once acted in this play! Ten imaginary points if you guess as which character.) Jack…
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This is a preview for our special Patreon bonus in which Rachel, Bekah, and returning guest Jess Owens (@saidbyjess) get together and talk tropes, baby. Which ones win? Which ones lose? Which ones have you never ever heard of before and maybe wish you could forget? We've got the deets. Join us on patreon.com/firethecanon to access full bonus episod…
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Well, well, well! We're back after a long hiatus in the middle of a pretty short book due to vacations of various sorts. For example, Jackie took a vacation to Italy (listen for an amazing story of being a dumb American), AND a vacation from being healthy by immediately getting Covid upon her return! But now we're all healthy and thriving, and Mrs.…
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Please join us as we read the first half of Virginia Woolf’s modernist masterpiece, Mrs. Dalloway! Taking place on a single day in mid-June 1923, the book takes us in and out of the minds of our two main characters, society housewife Clarissa Dalloway (who is throwing a party), and World War One veteran Septimus Warren Smith (who is having some ext…
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Join us as we delve into the life of Virginia Woolf, a woman who was many things, chiefly among them a writer! Despite Jackie promising to make this the most depressing author bio episode of all time, Rachel and Bekah refuse to let it happen. There's a lot of laughter, but also some almost-tears, and some hard topics, but it's worth it. Rachel reve…
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Stop! We see your eyeballs getting ready to dart away to something more fun. Dart 'em back here. This is the most fun you'll have hearing about race and racism since... ever, maybe! We know the bar is low, but still. Listen along to the original opening to our first Charlie and the Chocolate Factory episode, which immediately derailed into racial t…
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The gang finishes out the tale of ol' C-Bucks and the maniacal chocolate man in spectacular fashion - late, but not that late! Thanks for the endless patience of our many adoring fans. We would never turn you into marshmallows, even if that tube DID go to the marshmallow room. Jackie fucks up her audio, but doesn't know it yet (don't worry, she fix…
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Quick! What has 14 legs, one bed, and half a potato? Why, the Bucket family, of course! Join the gang as we cover the first half of Roodle Doodle's classic, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. You all know how the story goes, but you haven't heard it told by us. Rachel doxxes herself. Bekah learns about the Wonka-related scandal of the year. Jackie …
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She's back! University of Chicago professor, historian, and award-winning novelist Ada Palmer joins Rachel and Jackie for a conversation about the life and times of Niccolo Machiavelli, a fascinating guy who lived through fascinating times. Learn all about how his name gets an undeservedly bad rap, the trials and tribulations that led to the writin…
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There are certain "trends" that would indicate there is a method towards success for any child looking to succeed in the world economy. But if you follow that trend with your child, are you giving them the same chances of success as anyone else in the world? In this episode, Bill Priestley jumps into the numbers and how the idea of going to college…
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Happy March, everyone! For our Patreon bonus, we thought we'd try something new: The Reading Corner! Jackie and Rachel have a friendly chit chat about whatever books we're currently reading. Maybe it will become a recurring feature? It all depends on what you like, and what Jackie likes. It doesn't matter at all what Rachel likes. For the full epis…
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The patrons battled it out in honor of the upcoming Ides of March, and in the struggle between The Art of War and The Prince, let's just say The Art of War got Caesar'd. It's like getting Punk'd, but instead of meeting Ashton Kutcher you die and get a salad named after you. Win/win? Buckle up as the gang guides you through the world's second most p…
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How intrusive or active should you be as a parent in helping your child make a decision about a career? In this episode, Bill Priestley breaks down a study done by the University of Wisconsin on who teenagers trust when it comes to career advice. And you can use this information to your advantage in helping your child figure out if a career is righ…
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Ever wonder how you can identify passion and purpose in a work scenario? In this episode, Bill Priestley takes you through the process of identifying a career by aligning your interests, abilities and audiences to a goal that promotes passion and purpose in your life. This is the second half of the mini course which you can test drive as parents an…
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In preparation for our upcoming Charlie and the Chocolate Factory miniseries, we got the gang together to learn about the absolutely absurd life of Roald Dahl. Best-known for his children’s books, Dahl also wrote some very weird, pervy adult stories. Before he became a writer, he worked for an oil company in Africa (yes…… we know.), flew warplanes …
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It's generally a bad idea when looking to identify a career by asking the question, "what are you interested in?" The answer to that is like looking out on a meadow and picking your favorite blade of grass - there are too many possibilities to review in order to make a determination. In this episode, Bill Priestley jumps into what questions we need…
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Don’t say we never put our stellar reputations on the line for you! Joining us this week is our friend Jacob Waller (find him on YouTube as Big Yellow Praxis), who has recently fallen down the rabbit hole of a (potentially correct???) anti-Stratfordian theory (notably NOT a conspiracy theory). Jacob lays out the case for, conservatively, a HUGE AMO…
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So, who is making the decision about what your child is going to do with their life? Is it you the all knowing parent or is it them, the enthusiastic student looking to rule the world in their own way? In this episode, we break down the reasons as to why the child does get the final say, but it's not a lock stock and barrel decision for them. We'll…
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So, what happens when you and your child sit down to start talking about life after high school? How does that dymanic change when they turn 18 and, it seems, the world opens up for them and what they want to do with their lives. Bill Priestley looks at that dynamic and how you can use it to benefit both parent and child as both of you try to figur…
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Ahoy for the last time, me hearties! In this episode we cover Moby Dick from chapter 102 until the bitter, watery end. Ishmael finally reveals why Captain Ahab is so obsessed with Moby Dick, we finally discover the fate of pretty much the entire crew of the Pequod, and Moby Dick finally deigns to grace the page. Jackie does her Bob Dylan impression…
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Sometimes, we think we know what's right for our kids more than they do. Sometimes, we could be dead wrong about those assumptions. It's important to realize the difference in perspectives when it comes to career and how differently they can be between parents and children. Bill Priestley takes us on a water wheel to show how our own ideas about li…
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If our children are going to make the decision about the direction in which they want to take their lives, when should we as parents start to ask them questions about their life goals - especially those goals linked to career? Bill Priestley delves into the specific times you should be asking that question (or a version of it) and how that can help…
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This week, we're sharing part 2 of Jackie and Bekah reading one-star reviews of their favorite books to each other. Jackie comes at Bekah with the harshest criticisms of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice available on Goodreads. To hear the full episode, join our Patreon! Patreon.com/firethecanon. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★…
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In our first episode, Bill Priestley outlines his own journey in how he figured out what he wanted to do with his life and also gets into what's most important in the foundation of a relationship between parent and child as the child is getting ready to make big life decisions. Bill talks about the scariest question a parent can ask a child - but a…
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This week, we're joined by a very special guest: Nikita! Jackie handpicked her to co-host this episode because Nikita is funny, despite not being a man. We read and discussed the fourth of Charles Dickens' five Christmas Books so you don't have to, and you can go ahead and thank us for that. Rachel's mom tells her she doesn't deserve any presents. …
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In the spirit of the holidays, which some call the holiday spirit, this week we're re-releasing an old favorite from 2021: Agatha Christie's "Hercule Poirot's Christmas". Rejoin the original gang for a hilarious journey through a Christmas mystery (Christery). If you're anything like Jackie, the mystery will seem as fresh and new as it did two year…
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Ahoy! Welcome back to the podcast. In this episode, we cover chapters 71-101 of Moby Dick, and we come away with less whale knowledge than we started. Ishmael and Queequeg are wedded (again), a whale gets killed, ominous doings are done, etc., etc. Jackie is wrongfully accused of a crime, and rightfully admits to a crime. Rachel is wrongfully accus…
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We're back with another rousing look into the sleeping mind of Stephen, who really wants to know if you'd rather hold someone, or someone holds you, in bed, and there's another figure as well. Rachel wants to know if people like these episodes, so please tell us if you do, and say nothing if you don't. Join our Patreon to hear the full episode and …
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Ahoy, y’all! We’re back and we’re covering chapters 46 through 70 of Moby Dick. Sorry we were gone so long; Jackie was planning her annual Halloween party (that’s why we were gone, not Rachel’s wedding or bar exam study). In this part, Ishmael tells us the only good thing about Tahiti, and the Pequod boys finally have an interaction with a whale (s…
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Happy Monday! Are we late from last week, or early this week? Who knows. Look, we aren't JUST telling you what happens in chapters 26 through 45 of Moby Dick this week. We're also inviting you to a party that is DEFINITELY NOT A WEIRD SEX THING, explaining how to make bathtub crank, and telling you which apartments don't have glory holes in them. W…
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We're back with the first episode of our series on the incomparable, the amazing, the VERY VERY LONG classic novel Moby Dick! Experience Herman Melville's classic boy-meets-whale tale as neither you nor anyone else has ever experienced it before. Rachel finally has some technical difficulties. Bekah tries a new dental procedure she just learned abo…
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Happy Thursday, everyone! This week we have a Patreon bonus preview for you all, in which Bekah and Jackie take turns reading each other one-star reviews of each other's favorite books. This week, Bekah tries Jackie's patience with the words of some of the world's smartest book reviewers. We talk confusing feelings and even more confused grammar by…
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This week we bring you another of Jackie's favorite type of episode: author bios! Even more exciting, we have a MAN joining us, so you can rest assured that this episode will contain about 33% less crying than usual. Even MORE exciting, that man is British, so you KNOW there's absolutely no chance things are going to get overly emotional. Which is …
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Happy Thursday! This week Rachel, Jackie, and Bekah wrap up Pride Month with a bang. The gang keeps it lesbian and discuss the life and times (what little is known about them) of Sappho, the Ancient Greek "Poetess" whose works have survived for nearly 2500 years and are still being discovered and discussed. She was also probably at least somewhat i…
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Hi, lovely patrons! As our thank you for your support this month, we bring you the action-packed, hijinks-filled tale of Theo's role-playing game with Chat GPT as the Dungeon Master. Will Theo prevail in his goal of defeating a ridiculous monster with a ridiculous weapon of his own choice? Listen and find out, maybe! The first 5 or so minutes are f…
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The original gang is back! Why? Because Theo needs advice. Not just any advice - the oldest advice in the world. That’s right - this week we’re discussing The Wisdom of Ptah-Hotep, a “book” of “advice” from Ptah-Hotep, vizier of Pharaoh Isesi, the last ruler of the Fifth Dynasty of Egypt. Theo has a suggestion for how we can avoid fixing the health…
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This week, we're coming at you with another FANTASTIC author interview, this time with the brilliant and wonderfully unusual Frances Hardinge, the award-winning author of "A Face Like Glass", "Cuckoo Song", "The Lie Tree", "Deeplight", and, most recently, "Unraveller". Her books are, to use her own words, "fairly dark and invariably strange". A chi…
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We wrap up the second half of Kurt Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse-Five, and things actually get pretty real! Jackie isn't cut out for monogamy. Bekah schools an alien race on ableism. Rachel wants to normalize pooping in the dark with an electric guitar. So it goes! CONTENT WARNINGS: Sexual language, violence, trauma/PTSD, racism, sexism ★ Support this …
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Theo is back, baby! The OG Goosebuddies bring you another spook-tactic Bump Patrol episode. This is a mega long free preview, because the full episode is somehow mega long! What can we say, we love these weird lil tales. And this is the best one yet, IOHO (in our humble opinions). The full episode for Patrons will be out Friday, 4/21, due to aforem…
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In this episode, your intrepid hosts cover the first half of Kurt Vonnegut's highly autobiographical masterpiece, Slaughterhouse-Five. If you didn't catch his bio episode (#112), we highly recommend taking a listen! Accurately described by Rachel as both an upper and a downer at the same time, SH5 is a wild ride that spans multiple decades, countri…
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In preparation for our Slaughterhouse-Five episodes in April, this week we're covering the life of its author, Kurt Vonnegut Jr.! Never heard of him? Neither has Bekah! But sure enough, we'll all learn a little bit together, with Jackie leading us through the biography of one of her favorite authors. Kurt Von D, as no one ever called him until just…
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To borrow the parlance of a wise, wise man, today marks our eleventy-first episode! And what better way to celebrate than by listening to four millennials reminisce on the teen masterpiece She's the Man starring Amanda Bynes and Channing "Chiseled" Tatum? 3 out of 4 hosts agree: this is the greatest movie of all time. One host apparently does not u…
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Jackie and Rachel interview Gerardo Sámano Córdova, whose debut novel 'Monstrilio' was released on March 7, 2023. 'Monstrilio' is, per the LA Times book review, "an unearthly hybrid that’s part horror, part literary meditation on grief, part wildly entertaining tale." And, well, they were right! But it's also about so much more - a love story, an L…
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Welcome back! In typical Shakespearean comedy fashion, when last we left our characters, everyone was in love with the wrong person and/or pretending to be someone they’re not. Will Viola, Orsino, Olivia, and Sebastian ever figure this mess out?! Spoiler alert: yes. Join us as your hosts get a li’l wacky with it. Rachel doesn’t suffer fools. Jackie…
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