Managing love intelligently involves understanding your emotional, spiritual, and sexual needs, your boundaries, your deal-breakers, your fantasies, and everything else that allows you to optimize your success in letting the right one into your heart, life, and home. For advertising opportunities, email jason@stevening.com.
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As a sex offender counselor for over two decades, Steven Ing invites you to consider a whole new dimension of true sex crimes.
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Practical dating advice for men, which women, too, can benefit from hearing. You don’t need to read hundreds of books or watch hours of videos on this topic. It’s all quite simple. Tune in to learn more. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psy…
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In today's episode, we review the article “Going ‘Boy Sober’ Is About More Than Celibacy" in relation to managing love intelligently. The article was written by Anne Branigin and published in The Washington Post. The subhead reads, "Young people are reexamining their relationships with sex and dating amid a toxic online dating culture and an increa…
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Episode 42: Our Collective Discomfort with Sex
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Sex is all around us (internet, advertising, media); however, as a society, we don't really know how to talk about it. Tune in to today's episode to learn how becoming comfortable with this important topic can result in a healthier society. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic wor…
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Episode 41: Stuck in Relationship Inertia
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Today's episode was inspired by The New York Times Guest Essay by Hillary Kelly titled “Welcome to Stucktopia.” The essay opens by discussing some popular TV shows, such as Fallout, Severance, and Silo, and how these shows capture the way life feels right now, which is that we are stuck. We read through the essay and apply this idea of being "stuck…
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Episode 40: How Verbal Abuse Destroys Relationships
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It's a fundamental thinking error to think that verbal abuse in relationships is normal. We all deserve to be treated with respect, courtesy, and dignity. Listen to today's episode to learn more! For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology …
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Learn how setting, defending, and acting on your boundaries empowers your life. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Living. He is the creator and host …
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Episode 38: How Withholding Stifles Intimacy
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When it comes to our fantasy about what marriage can be like, our fantasy is that we wouldn't have to keep things from our spouse at all. The question is “How can I make the relationship safe enough for my mate to be as honest as humanly possible.” For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in fore…
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Understanding the Sacred Bubble allows you and your partner to form a sacred connection or bubble, where all of life's problems are outside of the bubble. This allows couples to resolve any conflicts in a safe, effective, and abuse-free manner, so they can get back to producing the only thing worth producing in a relationship: happiness. For over 3…
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Episode 36: Learning to Embrace Rejection
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We don't need a girlfriend or boyfriend; we need the RIGHT girlfriend or boyfriend. If someone rejects us, they are not the RIGHT girlfriend or boyfriend. None of us crave to be with someone who doesn't love us. Listen to learn more! For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He i…
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Episode 35: Integrating Spirituality and Sexuality
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Some people have sexuality in one compartment of their brain and spirituality in another compartment. Therefore, the two compartments never talk to each other. Integrating spirituality and sexuality, gets these two compartments talking to each other. Listen to today's episode to learn more. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage an…
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Episode 34: Gender Roles in Relationships
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Today's episode discusses gender roles in relationships. It was inspired by the NBC News article "Some dating coaches online are pushing women to seek more traditional gender roles" by Angela Yang. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psycholog…
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Steve responds to a message from a person calling themselves "Alone." Note: the message was in response to Steve's Psychology Today article "How to Keep an Incel from Becoming a Sex Offender." For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Tod…
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Episode 32: The Fallacy of "Love Conquers All"
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The belief that "love conquers all" is an unfortunate and harmful fallacy. We cannot love our partners into wellness; we cannot love our partners into sobriety; we cannot love our partners into no longer being emotionally, physically, or spiritually abusive. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a special…
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Episode 31: What's Your Magic Sex Number?
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Your magic sex number is the ideal number of sexual encounters you require on a weekly basis to feel your best. Listen to learn more and how knowing your magic sex number can help you manage love intelligently. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer…
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Episode 30: Can Men and Women Be Friends?
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Join us for an open discussion on whether men and women can be friends. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Living. He is the creator and host of the t…
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Episode 29: Why Authenticity Matters
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If you want real love, let your partner know who you really are and what you really think. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Living. He is the creato…
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Episode 28: Why Steve Dislikes Online Dating
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If you dislike online dating as much as Steve and are interested in shifting your approach to meeting potential partners, this episode is for you. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: W…
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Episode 27: Sexual Intimacy: If You Want to Have Better Sex, Listen Up
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The subject of "sexual intimacy" is so much bigger than just "doing it” with our partners. True sexual intimacy allows couples to safely share and express the full spectrum of their sexuality with one another. Listen to learn more. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is …
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Episode 26: 120 Days of Narcissistic Love
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The main idea behind "120 Days of Narcissistic Love" is that when you fall in love with a new lover, the things that you love about this person are the things you love about yourself. Tune in to learn more and how becoming aware of this phenomenon can help you manage love intelligently. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Fa…
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Episode 25: How to Resolve Conflicts That Are Keeping Us Apart
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Learning how to resolve the conflicts that are keeping us apart is one of the best ways to develop intimacy. Conflict, after all, is an essential and inevitable part of every intimate relationship. In today's episode, you will learn how to engage in conflict in an intelligent, healthy, and abuse-free manner. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has …
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Episode 24: Divorce Is the Solution to a Problem
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If we're committed to “Managing Love Intelligently,” we have to be open to the possibility that (1) we might make mistakes and (2) intelligent people learn from their mistakes. One of the biggest mistakes we can make is in the area of mate selection, the most disastrous of which is marrying the wrong person. Thankfully, there's a remedy for marital…
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Episode 23: Is Porn an Intelligent Way to Manage Your Sexuality?
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Porn is not just one thing. For some, porn is a wonderful part of their bedroom activities; for others, porn brings up all types of body issues; and for others, it's distasteful and uncomfortable. Join us as we discuss porn from a variety of different angles and examine if it's an intelligent way to manage your sexuality. For over 30 years, Steven …
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Episode 22: The Epidemic of Lonely Men
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In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek Murthy, said America is suffering from an epidemic of loneliness, and that men are the number one demographic most affected by that loneliness. Steve explains why he agrees with the Surgeon General's assessment and offers some advice to remedy the situation. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a…
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Episode 21: Acknowledging and Understanding Your Sexual Needs
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Ordinary human sexual needs are the one kind of human need our species hasn't learned how to discuss. Tune in to learn how acknowledging and understanding these needs can result in healthier choices for us all. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer…
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Episode 20: Moving Beyond the Five Love Languages
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Steve explains why the five love languages are a vague and bygone notion. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Living. He is the creator and host of the…
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Episode 19: Building Equality Into Your Relationship
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Equality, for couples, means the end of loneliness. We have a partner of equal value in the relationship. And we each have a vital part to play and an opinion worth listening to. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the aut…
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Episode 18: The Intentional Debriefing: Why Examining Expired Relationships Matters
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The Intentional Debriefing is an individual journey, where you look in the mirror, examine what went wrong in your last relationship, and learn everything you need to learn in order to move on and avoid making the same mistakes in the future. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic w…
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Steve and Jason have an unbiased conversation about monogamy and polyamory. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Living. He is the creator and host of t…
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Steve explains why he believes people should go on at least 30 dates prior to settling down. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Living. He is the crea…
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Episode 15: What Sex Offenders Can Teach Us
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Steve debunks some of the myths surrounding sex offenders and explains what they can teach us about managing our sexuality intelligently. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All …
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Episode 14: Marriage: What's the Rush?
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Steve talks marriage and examines the benefits of slowing down, becoming more intentional, and learning more about your partner prior to tying the knot. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexual…
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The Abuse-Free Life is a powerful tool that can positively transform your relationships and your life. Listen to learn more and start living an Abuse-Free Life today! For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two b…
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Episode 12: Intimacy: The Secret to Lasting Love
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Steve explains what he means by the term "intimacy" and why it's the secret to lasting love. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Living. He is the crea…
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Steve shares his thoughts on sexual education programming in the United States and explains what a real sex ed class should look like. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Lik…
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Episode 10: God's Playground for Grownups
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Steve explains how sexual play and humor between partners can open up infinite possibilities in the bedroom. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Living…
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In this episode Steve addresses sex addiction and explains what's really going on in the mind of a "sex addict." For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All Like This and Get Busy Li…
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Episode 8: Why Talking About Sex Matters
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When it comes to sex, most people can "do it" but cannot talk about it. Steve explains the reasons behind this phenomenon and why talking about sex matters, especially in regards to managing our sexuality intelligently. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributi…
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Steve explains his thoughts on toxic masculinity and how he's more in favor of viewing it as an individual problem rather than a societal problem. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: W…
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Episode 6: The Intentional Interview, Pt. 2
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In this episode Steve explains what The Intentional Interview looks like, how to put it into practice, the guiding principles, and so on. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Today and the author of two books on sexuality: We're All …
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Episode 5: The Intentional Interview, Pt. 1
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The Intentional Interview is a Steven Ing classic. It allows you the opportunity to ask specific questions that will help you determine if a relationship is worth pursuing or not. These questions should be based off what you learned from your past relationship so that you don’t repeat the same mistakes as last time. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, M…
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Episode 4: The Madonna-Whore Complex
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In this episode, Steven discusses the Madonna-Whore Complex (MWC) and his experiences with it. Wikipedia defines MWC as the inability to maintain sexual arousal within a committed, loving relationship. Sigmund Freud first identified this complex, under the rubric of "psychic impotence." It is a psychological complex said to develop in men who see w…
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Episode 3: Creating a Life Worth Living
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The idea of creating a life worth living is rather obvious, but how many people are actually doing it? Steven explains how this concept pertains to sex, love, relationships, and so much more. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing writer to Psychology Toda…
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Episode 1: What Does It Mean to Manage Your Sexuality Intelligently?
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You know what it means to manage your finances intelligently. You know what it means to manage your fitness or nutritional program intelligently. You know what it means to manage your career aspirations and your academic needs and you know a lot about a lot when it comes to managing your life intelligently. However, do you know how to manage your s…
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In Episode 2, we discuss Steven’s personal journey into religion as well as his departure from the church. We also discuss how religion relates to sexuality, specifically the intelligent management of sexuality. For over 30 years, Steven Ing, MFT, has been a Marriage and Family Therapist with a specialty in forensic work. He is a contributing write…
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Sam had a chronically terminal case of potential. Diagnosed with ADHD at a young age, he was never able to really master anything...except finishing a bottle. After a DUI at 20, Sam started getting into file sharing, which included music, art and photos of girls...young girls. He knew they were really, really young but by this time in his life, Sam…
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Ben was a simple man with simple needs, who’d never had a sexual partner. Having more than his share of obstacles since birth, an adult Ben was no stranger to the law and quickly became dependent on his closest connection to the outside world: the Internet. There, he found a room called "Titillation" in a place called Sex Crime Central. Thank you f…
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Though 18-year-old Victor was a proud and active member of his tribe, he was desperate to escape the reservation and the chronic domestic violence in his family’s home. When he finally broke free of the reservation with some money in hand, Victor couldn’t wait for his bright future ahead, but had no idea what was next for him. When he met the attra…
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Marine Mike Rojas had sorted everything out...except his uncertainty with social situations. With no idea how to make friends or function in society, Mike made one final bar stop at Sex Crime Central, a place where the bartenders always serve you whatever you need before serving you up to the cops. Thank you for listening! If you like what you hear…
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There's a type of knock at the door that, once you hear it, you never forget it: experienced citizens call it "the cop knock." Vince had heard that knock, but never before like this. At 44 with no real success in any area of his life, his “Plan B” now included a final stop at Sex Crime Central. Thank you for listening! If you like what you heard, p…
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José was the hardest working ranch hand around by anyone’s standards. He had married someone his mother approved of, but when that fell apart, his state of mind shifted to a continuous and deep sense of shame. Without any clear sense of direction, Jose unthinkingly decided to go down an unfamiliar road, a road leading to the terminal at Sex Crime C…
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