The goal of healing isn't just stopping the crisis. It's ultimately moving into genuine and meaningful connection with ourselves, each other, and the world around us. Join licensed therapist and author Geoff Steurer and his wife, Jody Steurer, as they share ways to move out of the crisis of sexual betrayal and relationship betrayal trauma toward connection. The information in these discussions transcends religious and cultural lines, as we all seek the same healing power of connection.
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Living with Unmet Expectations - Episode 258
28:53
28:53
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How many of you have the exact life that you mapped out when you were younger? The perfect spouse, perfect children, perfect life, where everyone does exactly what you want them to? It’s pretty fair to say that how life plays out is vastly different than what we picture in our heads, especially considering that the people in our lives get to choose…
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A Deeper Look at Forgiveness and Apologies - with Lisa Stoddard-Reeves - Episode 257
41:39
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In this episode, we welcome Lisa Stoddard Reeves to discuss the complex aspects of forgiveness in relationships, particularly within Christian contexts. Lisa highlights the potential harms of oversimplifying forgiveness, especially in cases of significant betrayals. She examines the different dimensions and types of forgiveness — including extendin…
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Demystifying the Polygraph Test - with Jared Rockwood - Episode 256
39:11
39:11
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What do you think of when you think of a polygraph test? Do you think of a gimmick you’ve seen on TV, or do you think of a reliable truth-telling device? In this episode we welcome Jared Rockwood, a polygraph examiner with extensive experience and training, to discuss the role of polygraph tests in rebuilding trust after betrayal. Jared explains th…
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Do you ever wonder if it’s necessary to praise someone for a basic action you feel they should automatically be doing? In this episode we have a nuanced discussion about the dynamics between being supportive and appreciative within a relationship, especially when partners start contributing to the relationship after a period of not doing so. We exa…
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When Betrayal Threatens Your Goodness - Episode 254
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Trauma responses can alter how we see ourselves, our relationships, and the world. In this episode we focus on managing betrayal trauma and its impact on our self-perception of goodness. While this can be affected through other traumas, betrayal uniquely affects our core identity and sense of safety. Join us as we discuss the importance of boundari…
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"I Meant Well...and Other Words that Kill Relationships" - with Heather Linchenko - Episode 253
47:10
47:10
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"I Meant Well...and Other Words That Kill Relationships" - with Heather Linchenko - Episode 253
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Relationships of every kind make up the fabric of our lives. In this episode we invite Heather Linchenko to join us, author and expert on healthy relationships. Heather discusses her book 'I Meant Well…and Other Words That Kill Relationships,' which offers advice on improving relationships. She shares insights from her experiences working with Step…
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Sweeping Your Side of the Street - Episode 252
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23:15
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There are always complex challenges and dynamics in managing one's own recovery after betrayal or broken trust, and it is often tempting to become overly invested in a partner’s recovery journey as well. Perhaps you've heard the recovery metaphor of 'sweeping your side of the street,' and how partners can sometimes fall into patterns of over-contro…
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"Sex Educated" - with Bonnie Young - Episode 251
43:54
43:54
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If you could go back in time, what would you share with your younger self about their body, sexuality, relationships, and sexual connection? In this episode, we welcome Bonnie Young, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and founder of Azure Counseling. Bonnie discusses her book 'Sex Educated: Letters from a Latter-day Saint Therapist to Her Yo…
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How Loved Ones Can Offer Support - Episode 250
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When you are on the sidelines watching a friend go through the trauma of betrayal, it can be difficult not to choose sides or to know when to help and when to step back. In this episode we explore the importance of assessing your role in their support system, setting clear boundaries, and managing personal resources while offering support to an ind…
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Should I Stay or Go? - with Amie Woolsey - Episode 249
46:02
46:02
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Typically our podcast and practice focuses on repairing relationships. But within that work is the very real question of “should I stay or should I go?” In this episode we invited Amie Woolsey to discuss the challenging topic of deciding whether to stay in or leave a relationship following serious betrayals such as infidelity, abuse, or neglect. Th…
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Should I Stay Or Go? - with Amie Woolsey - Episode 249
46:02
46:02
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Typically our podcast and practice focuses on repairing relationships. But within that work is the very real question of “should I stay or should I go?” In this episode we invited Amie Woolsey to discuss the challenging topic of deciding whether to stay in or leave a relationship following serious betrayals such as infidelity, abuse, or neglect. Th…
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Can Safety Needs Go Too Far? - Episode 248
23:46
23:46
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The safety needs for a betrayed partner immediately following betrayal can often feel extreme initially, but are crucial for the nervous system’s stability and recovery. Join us as we discuss how the betrayed partner's safety can be ensured by eliminating triggers and threats, and the importance of the betraying partner's responsiveness to these ne…
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An Affair, a Murder, and a Divorce - with Ashlee Boyson - Episode 247
46:18
46:18
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In this heartfelt interview, Ashlee Boyson shares her powerful story of overcoming devastating betrayal and loss. Starting from the time she became distant from her husband following the birth of their fifth child, Ashlee describes the overwhelming anxiety and turmoil she faced, culminating in discovering her husband's infidelity and his tragic mur…
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Building a Life After Divorce - Episode 246
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21:56
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In this episode I share a question from a listener coping with life after divorce. Men tend to have less social support than women, often due to couple and family friendships being more driven by the women. This can leave men feeling isolated and lonely after divorce if those friendships ended when the marriage dissolved. Join me as I discuss the e…
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Unintentionally Hurting Your Partner - Episode 245
19:14
19:14
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There is a metaphor used in the Boy Scouts called the “blood circle”. To summarize, it encourages young boys to create an area around you where you are less likely to cut someone with your pocket knife. In this episode we are using this metaphor as it relates to unintentionally hurting others, specifically in the context of rebuilding trust in rela…
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Disarming Coercive Behaviors - Episode 244
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23:56
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How do you deal with coercion and emotional immaturity from other people? Do you defend yourself, disengage, or meet the other person at their level and try to play their game? In this episode we discuss the importance of disengaging from unhealthy interactions, not engaging in defense, and focusing on our own actions and reactions. The Power of Co…
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The Challenge of Rebuilding Trust - With Brannon Patrick - Episode 243
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I was recently invited to be a guest on the “Therapy Brothers” podcast. In this thought-provoking episode, Brannon Patrick and I delve into the complex and crucial topic of rebuilding trust in relationships affected by betrayal. We explore the foundational role of honesty in the healing process, discuss the challenges and misconceptions about trust…
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The Challenge of Rebuilding Trust - with Brannon Patrick - Episode 243
45:06
45:06
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I was recently invited to be a guest on the “Therapy Brothers” podcast. In this thought-provoking episode, Brannon Patrick and I delve into the complex and crucial topic of rebuilding trust in relationships affected by betrayal. We explore the foundational role of honesty in the healing process, discuss the challenges and misconceptions about trust…
…
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Inpatient vs. Outpatient Treatment - Episode 242
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Sobriety, safety, support, and stability are crucial in the aftermath of addiction and betrayal, and can be found in both inpatient and outpatient treatment scenarios. Join me as I outline the importance of personalized considerations, support systems, and cost implications in making the decision between inpatient and outpatient treatment for addic…
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