Best Matt & Sheri Salis Podcasts (2024)

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Ep254 – Are Resentments Holding You Back? 56:29

2h ago56:29

56:29

Sheri and Matt talk a lot about processing resentments together, and how it helps repair their relationship. But what if your partner is not available, not willing or not capable of processing resentments with you? Sheri and Matt explore a solo process of digging deep into the “why,” analyzing the fear and finding empathy for the benefit of the per…

1
Ep253 – Authenticity while Honoring His Memory with Melanie 1:15:43

2h ago1:15:43

1:15:43

Melanie fell in love with her best friend – a nature-loving, long-haired bad boy with a good heart. They built a life together including marriage, kids, businesses and lots of pets. And now alcohol has stollen the love of her life and left Melanie a widow far too young. Please listen as she tells this tragic love story and explains how she is climb…

1
Ep252 – Is Fear the Only Emotion? 1:01:47

9d ago1:01:47

1:01:47

Matt reveals to Sheri his theory that there is only one true emotion: fear. The couple discuss how fear drive’s Matt’s addictions, and how fearlessness is a big part of the peace and contentment Sheri enjoys. If you are or were the partner of an alcoholic, please check out our Alcoholic Intimacy Survey. If you would like to learn more about our SHO…

1
Ep251 – Alcohol-Free Beverages and Culture with Billy Wynne 1:01:17

5d ago1:01:17

1:01:17

Billy Wynne is the co-founder of Awake, Denver’s first sober bar, alcohol-free bottle shop and coffee house. Billy joins Sheri and Matt to discuss the explosion of alcohol-free beers, wines and spirits. They discuss what is driving the emerging trends, the demographics of the alcohol-free beverage industry and the importance of individual choice as…

1
Ep250 – The DD 10:1 Intimacy Solution

12d ago

—

To celebrate this milestone episode, Sheri and Matt go into more detail, and share preliminary research indications, about the importance of intimacy work for relationship recovery. If you are waiting for intimacy and trust to rebuild, without actively engaging in an intimacy practice, you are likely adding time to your suffering. If you are or wer…

1
Ep249 – Busy is a Matter of Priorities 54:47

19d ago54:47

54:47

What could be a higher priority than your own health, safety, growth, and discovery? And yet, people often say they are too busy to work on recovery from alcoholism – both former drinkers and loved ones alike. Sheri and Matt talk about why and how they prioritize their mental and emotional health, and why “busy” is an excuse and a defeatist mindset…

1
Ep248 – Change How You Feel with Lori Pannell 1:09:40

26d ago1:09:40

1:09:40

Lori Pannell is a leadership coach certified in Conversational Intelligence, and she is an Energy Leadership Index master practitioner. She is also a valued leader in our Echoes of Recovery program, and she joins Sheri and Matt to talk about how thoughts lead to feelings which drive our actions. Lori shares some really practical advice about managi…

1
Ep247 – Vulnerability Rewarded with Kathy and Mike 1:16:49

2M ago1:16:49

1:16:49

If you are searching for hope and inspiration, please listen to the story of Kathy and Mike Mazzerina from the Defining You podcast and facebook page. By owning their story of addiction and redemption, Kathy and Mike are inspiring others to find recovery and growth. But they are doing something else, too. Through their vulnerability, and encouragin…

1
Ep246 – Detachment is a Result, Not a Tactic

1M ago

—

Detachment is not necessarily something you do, as people often assume. Detachment is a natural result of living in hyper-vigilance, in nervous system activation for long periods of time. On this episode, Sheri and Matt talk about fight, flight, freeze and fawn, and how being constantly activated leads to nervous system overwhelm. That’s where deta…

1
Ep245 – Emotional Abuse with Paul Colaianni 1:25:14

2M ago1:25:14

1:25:14

Everyone knows what physical abuse is, and it is clearly not acceptable in modern relationships. What makes emotional abuse so sinister is that it is often justified by perpetrators in disbelief and hard to identify by conditioned victims. On this episode, Sheri and Matt welcome Paul Colaianni – behavior and relationship coach, and host of The Love…

1
Ep244 – Vulnerability Makes Us Feel Normal 58:39

2M ago58:39

58:39

Vulnerability and authenticity are hard when you have experienced alcoholism first or second hand, but they are also essential to recovery and discovery. Maybe you have done a lot of listening and reading, but have protected your secret. Maybe you think joining our SHOUT Sobriety or Echoes of Recovery groups are your only next step, and you are try…

1
Ep243 – Staying in the Relationship Roundtable, Part 2 1:20:03

2M ago1:20:03

1:20:03

Listen to Teaubrian, Rich and Ben discuss their evolution of thinking and experiences in both personal and relationship recovery after beating alcoholism. This conversation is all about authenticity and awareness of themselves and the people around them. It's also about building something new.If you are or were the partner of an alcoholic, please c…

1
Ep242 – Staying in the Relationship Roundtable, Part 1 1:24:38

3M ago1:24:38

1:24:38

Listen to Jane, Karen, Nickie, Lori and Nicole describe their decision making and experiences staying in their marriages as they recover from the alcoholism of their partners. This episode is about individual growth and discovery just as much as it is about the changes in their relationships.If you are or were the partner of an alcoholic, please ch…

1
Ep241 – Unrespected Advice 1:02:59

3M ago1:02:59

1:02:59

After the chaos and trauma of active alcoholism, loved ones naturally lose respect for their drinkers. Advice from the recovering alcoholic is often not welcome, and can do serious damage to the relationship. On this episode, Sheri and Matt relate their personal experience with both unwanted advice, and regained respect.If you are or were the partn…

1
Ep240 – Be Nice 1:04:44

3M ago1:04:44

1:04:44

During Matt's active addiction, Sheri and Matt had to try to run communication through a variety of contrived filters in order to be nice to each other. On this episode, the couple talks about the process they went through to get from artificial and occasional bouts of niceness to a genuine and consistent pattern of being nice. As is so often the c…

1
Ep239 – Impact of Alcoholism on Sex and Intimacy Roundtable 1:16:21

3M ago1:16:21

1:16:21

There are two things that can happen to sex and intimacy in a relationships suffering through alcoholism. On this episode, Sheri and Matt welcome Nikki, Rene and Nicole who share their experiences with both traumatizing outcomes.If you are or were the partner of an alcoholic, please check out our Alcoholic Intimacy Survey.If you love or loved an al…

1
Ep238 – Origins of Anxiety 59:50

4M ago59:50

59:50

The chaos and trauma of active addiction is obvious. But what about before we acknowledge alcoholism? What about before we cross that invisible line? The efforts we make to manipulate our partners seem simple, even helpful, on the surface. But the partners of alcoholics often suffer from anxiety caused by not feeling worthy. When partners eventuall…

1
Ep237 – Jason Polk is Back to Talk about Marijuana and Porn 1:12:59

4M ago1:12:59

1:12:59

Original co-host of the podcast, Jason Polk is a relationship therapist with a sub-specialization in addiction counseling. On this episode, Sheri and Matt ask Jason about the dangers of substituting weed for alcohol, and how porn impacts relationships. To hear more from Jason, check out his podcast: Solving Disconnection and Creating Connected Rela…

1
Ep236 – Deceit Betrayal 1:00:15

4M ago1:00:15

1:00:15

The lying is worse than the drinking. Sheri and Matt have heard this sentiment expressed countless times by partners who are suffering from the trauma of betrayal. Honesty is so important even when honesty is impossibly hard.If you are or were the partner of an alcoholic, please check out our Alcoholic Intimacy Survey.If you love or loved an alcoho…

1
Ep235 – Relapse with Anna and Mitchell of We Are Recovery 1:21:02

5M ago1:21:02

1:21:02

After five years of sobriety, Mitchell relapsed. After five years in recovery from codependency, Anna's boundaries were tested. On this episode, Sheri and Matt welcome the creators of We Are Recovery to talk about what led up to the relapse, and how they are bouncing back in the authentic, raw and vulnerable way that is the reason Anna and Mitchell…

1
Ep234 – Military Culture 1:10:05

5M ago1:10:05

1:10:05

Do you think your industry or environment has a heavy drinking culture? You are probably right, but you are not unique. In this episode, Sheri and Matt talk (from their civilian perspective) about the things that set military families apart. "Thank you for your service," is not enough.If you are or were the partner of an alcoholic, please check out…

1
Ep233 – Toxic Relationship Patterns with Heidi Rain 1:15:50

5M ago1:15:50

1:15:50

Heidi Rain is a relationship expert focused on the link between codependency and addiction. She helps people break free from toxic relationship patters. Sheri and Matt are thrilled to have her join them on the podcast, and you can learn more about her and her important work at HeidiRain.com.If you are or were the partner of an alcoholic, please che…

1
Ep232 – Question FOR Listeners: When do kid decisions become unilateral? 1:00:35

5M ago1:00:35

1:00:35

During Matt's active addiction, Sheri had to pick and choose the times she discussed big parenting decisions with him, and there was plenty of stress and anxiety around raising the kids, but she never cut Matt off and made parenting decisions unilaterally. What has to happen to make the partner of the drinker cut the drinker off from parental decis…

1
Ep231 – Marriagevolution Retreat Roundtable 1:27:57

5M ago1:27:57

1:27:57

Five couples retreat under a foot of fresh powder to the Rockie Mountains to bask in the glow of the fireplace and revive sore hiking (and shovelling) muscles in the bubbles of the hot tub with not a drop of alcohol among them...and have a fun, bonding, restorative time. A few years ago, Sheri and Matt would not have thought this possible. Do you h…

1
Ep230 – Expectations 57:30

6M ago57:30

57:30

What are your expectations for recovery, for you or the people around you? Some expectations are absolute necessities. Others are unachievable, and even harmful. Sheri and Matt talk through a bunch of scenarios and explain how their expectations have changed over time.Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want t…

1
Ep229 – Roundtable: Navigating Custody of the Kids 1:21:37

6M ago1:21:37

1:21:37

***Trigger Warning: Death from alcohol abuse is discussed.Julie, Rachel, Becky and Melanie join the conversation and help Sheri and Matt break down the issues surrounding custody agreements and co-parenting arrangements. From the impact these decisions have on the, "should I stay or should I go," decision, to communicating with the kids, this round…

1
Ep228 – Loneliness Leads to Drinking, Drinking Leads to Loneliness 1:00:55

6M ago1:00:55

1:00:55

We would never blame one person's alcoholism on the attitude or actions of their partner. But it is also naive to ignore that loneliness in a relationship is an underlying issue that leads to self-medication. And that self-medication creates more distance. Guess what that distance leads to? (If you guessed, "more drinking," you are picking up what …

1
Ep227 – Recovery Rumble: Amber vs. Matt 1:19:39

6M ago1:19:39

1:19:39

In this corner, making her third appearance on the Untoxicated Podcast, is Master Addiction Counselor, star and host of the Put the Shovel Down YouTube channel, the one, the only, the fabulous Amber Hollingsworth. And in this corner, is an old drunk who seems to now be addicted to asking questions and forming opinion about addiction, Sheri's husban…

1
Ep226 – Enthusiastic Consent 59:22

7M ago59:22

59:22

The more Sheri and Matt learn, the more undeniable the connection is between emotional intimacy, physical intimacy, sexual satisfaction and trust. Understanding the connection requires understanding the ways in which alcoholism does damage to intimacy in romantic partnerships. Sheri laughs and cries hard in this emotional episode.Sheri and Matt sta…

1
Ep225 – D!@k Olympics: Size Isn’t Everything, but You Are a Big One 1:25:51

7M ago1:25:51

1:25:51

Early sobriety from high-functioning alcoholism is plagued with dopamine depletion and identity crisis resulting in mood swings, tension, sadness, thin skin and meanness. As a three-time gold medalist in the 2017 D!@k Olympics, Matt leads a roundtable discussion about what is takes to qualify for, and succeed in, this gruelling competition.Sheri an…

1
Ep224 – Remembering Why We Fell in Love 58:19

7M ago58:19

58:19

There is conflict inherent in alcoholic relationships. And conflict brings guilt. Regardless of the outcome of the relationship, the conflict and guilt deserves relief. Sheri and Matt talk about the benefits of taking the time to remember why we fell in love.Do you want to ask Sheri and Matt a question? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUna…

1
Ep223 – Reconciling the Role of Family 1:00:57

7M ago1:00:57

1:00:57

Merry Christmas! During the holiday season, strained family relations manifest in challenging ways. There is perhaps no better time for Sheri and Matt to talk about the role of family in support of recovery - for the alcoholic or the loved one. Are we expecting too much?Do you want to ask Sheri and Matt a question? if so, send your question to matt…

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Ep222 – Scary Ghost Stories of Christmases Not Long Ago 58:54

8M ago58:54

58:54

It's the most wonderful time of the year. At least that's how it is hyped. If you are living through the holiday season with active alcoholism or early sobriety, the trauma and nervous system dysregulation can make this time of the year terrifying. On this episode, Sheri and Matt relive some relatable memories, give you a completely unnecessary edu…

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Ep221 – Be Careful What You Wish For with Traci and Andy 1:11:12

8M ago1:11:12

1:11:12

Traci is back on the podcast! And this time, she brought her husband, Andy, along for the conversation. It has been over three years since Traci laid some wisdom on us in Ep61 when she lamented that when Andy got sober, it turned out that he had opinions. Five years into Andy's sobriety, they both continue to grow and recover, and Traci is here to …

1
Ep220 – The Pain Concoction 46:40

8M ago46:40

46:40

There are a lot of universalisms in alcoholism and recovery, for the drinkers and the loved ones. One thing that sets each of us apart is the pain concoction that leads to sobriety and recovery. The pain concoction is the opposite of the reason for Sheri's new-found love of Dr. Pepper.Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s quest…

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Ep219 – Barbara’s Grief, Guilt and Growth 1:26:40

8M ago1:26:40

1:26:40

*** Warning: suicide and death are discussedBarbara first appeared on the podcast almost three years ago on Ep70 when she shared the story of her husband's alcoholism that led to her becoming a living organ donor before their eventual divorce. Barbara's story has progressed significantly, and so has her understanding of the impact of alcohol on her…

1
Ep218 – Holiday Triggers and the Healing Power of Time 50:06

8M ago50:06

50:06

Traditions and triggers go hand in hand, and at no time is that more prevalent than during the holiday season. Sheri and Matt discuss how triggers and traditions have changed for them over time. They also brag about their credentials, and the talents derived from long toes, in a cringey sort of way.Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a li…

1
Ep217 – Separation Roundtable: The Critical Mindset Shift 1:27:05

9M ago1:27:05

1:27:05

We did not set out to record three episodes on the topic of relationship separation, but the response to parts one and two has been overwhelming, so we are proud to bring you this third installment in our unintentional series. Listen for the unmistakable balance of pride, humility, vulnerability and commitment in the voices of our three panelists w…

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Ep216 – Lowered Standards and Disappointing Outcomes 1:00:49

9M ago1:00:49

1:00:49

***Trigger Warning - Talk of Self Harm and SuicideIt is common knowledge that alcoholism is a progressive disease in relation to the volume and frequency of consumption. What is rarely considered is that the loved ones of alcoholics lower their own standards in a progressive way as well. In this episode, Sheri and Matt talk about the origins of our…

1
Ep215 – Expectations 1:00:29

9M ago1:00:29

1:00:29

When is recovery over? When can we call declare success? Sheri and Matt discuss the baseline expectations that everyone deserves to have met in a thriving, loving relationship. They also discuss the expectations that lead to disappointment, and how those unmet expectations are often misdiagnosed as an indication that the person or the relationship …

1
Ep214 – The Healing Power of Separation Roundtable 1:16:52

9M ago1:16:52

1:16:52

Sheri and Matt welcome Nicole, Lisa, Sarah, Shannon and Kelly to the podcast to share their real-life experiences with separation from their alcoholic spouses. Some of the separations led to divorce. Some of the separations led to sobriety and reconciliation. Some of the separations are new, and some have transpired over years. The two things all o…

1
Ep213 – Detachment and Separation 1:00:20

10M ago1:00:20

1:00:20

Sheri and Matt deal with Matt's hypocrisy about supporting detachment in alcoholic relationships. up to and including physical separation, when the couple never got separated themselves during his active addiction or recovery.Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on Novem…

1
Ep212 – Curiosity in Relationship Recovery 57:38

10M ago57:38

57:38

No transition was more important to Sheri's and Matt's relationship recovery than when Matt stopped telling Sheri what she was doing wrong and started trying to understand why she felt the way she did. It was a major shift that saved their marriage, and they talk all about it on this episode.Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for…

1
Ep211 – The Recovery Revolution with Cory Martin 1:18:20

10M ago1:18:20

1:18:20

Comedian and Recovery Coach, Cory Martin, joins Sheri and Matt for this insightful and deep episode That's right, she's not just about laughs. Cory pairs humor with some unconventional and well thought out ideas and perspectives including her 7 Active Principles of Conscious Recovery. She challenges some of Sheri's and Matt's thinking, and shares s…

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Ep210 – Is My Husband’s Alcoholism My Fault? 1:04:40

10M ago1:04:40

1:04:40

No. That's the short version of the title question's answer. An emphatic, "no," in fact. But as with most of the world's hard-to-solve problems, there is much more to the story. On this episode, Sheri and Matt breakdown what happens in a alcoholic relationship breakdown, the roles of the partners, and how the relationship can be repaired.Sheri and …

1
Ep209 – A Fit for Everyone: Recovery Program Roundtable 1:12:38

11M ago1:12:38

1:12:38

Our six panelist share their experiences and perceptions with a wide variety of alcohol addiction recovery programs. Some common themes emerge, like the healing power of finding your tribe, and that when it comes to recovery programs, there is no one size that fits all. Our roundtable discusses the role of science, the role of spirituality, traditi…

1
Ep208 – The Developing Story Writing Workshop for Teens 1:07:34

11M ago1:07:34

1:07:34

Sheri and Matt welcome the most special of guests, their daughter, Cathryn, for a return visit to the podcast. This time, instead of working through the heart wrenching experiences of Cathryn's childhood, like they did on Ep200, they talk through all the details about their newest program: The Developing Story Writing Workshop for teens who have be…

1
Ep207 – Happily in the Middle 1:00:42

11M ago1:00:42

1:00:42

Sheri and Matt discuss the personality type that often underlies high-functioning alcoholism. Removing the alcohol doesn't change the personality, and for Matt, and millions of others, the work of recovery is understanding their discomfort with contentment. Confused much? Give this one a listen.Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listen…

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Ep206 – Surviving and Thriving with Kim Augustus 59:22

11M ago59:22

59:22

Kim's nervous system, her mental health and her marriage were all suffering from the trauma of addiction. A happy ending seemed woefully unlikely. But with persistence, fortunate timing and openness to consider different alternatives, Kim's husband has found lasting sobriety, and theirs is a story of redemption and hope - a story Kim thrives from t…

1
Ep205 – The Addiction Triangle 59:09

12M ago59:09

59:09

Addiction sucks so much of the air from any relationship. Then in early sobriety, recovery work replaces alcohol taking priority over the alcoholic's family. As recovery continues, that third energy intruding on the relationship morphs into replacement addiction and other family issues. Having something there, the third side of the triangle, become…

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Matt & Sheri Salis Podcasts

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