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Stepmonster

Stepmoms Bailey & Alyse

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Stepmonster is a podcast for every stepmom out there who has struggled. We are two friends and stepmoms who were bonded together by the blended family life. Together, we’re tackling the stigma of being the wicked stepmom, AKA, the ”stepmonster”, and sharing all of our stories for your benefit. You’ll hear us laugh, cry, give advice, and clink our wine glasses to all stepmoms battling the stigma together.
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Minisode submission: ...."Fast forward to 2021, six months in our new home, and my fiance lets it slip that he had actually slept with his ex-wife BEFORE coming over to my house to tell me he wanted to work on his marriage back in 2018. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Here I was thinking how he was such a good guy but all along he had cheated on me…
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This minisode talks through one stepmom's challenges with her 12-year-old stepkid who is particularly difficult. Refusing to get along, is annoyed by everything, and then on TOP of all of that, her hubs says if she can't figure out how to get along with his kid, he might want a divorce. Should she stick it out? Is it worth it? Hear our take.…
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As stepmoms, we constantly battle with the need to feel accepted. In this episode, we talk about: The difference between acceptance and appreciation? What should we expect in our homes, if anything? Having certain expectations we may have had early in our stepmom journey and how to overcome them with or without the support of those around you. Find…
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This minisode covers a submission from one of our listeners surrounding her stepson, who has been increasingly disrespectful and ungrateful. Layered on top of an already complex situation involving false allegations, CPS, and losing custody of two kids already - this one is a challenge. Listen in as Bailey and Alyse give this stepmom advice on how …
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We're BACK! Spend the first 10 minutes catching up on life with us, but if you want to skip RIGHT to the meat of the episode, skip to minute 11. In this episode, Bailey and Alyse talk through the challenges which come along with having to deal with family courts, or as Alyse calls it, "the clown show". We talk through ways to handle situations thro…
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We are so excited to have Joseph Goldberg as a guest on our show. His last three years have been devoted to the study of research that explains the causal factors of high conflict interpersonal disputes, and family relational problems. The new factors from the neurobiological research put a new spin on not only what causes these problems to surface…
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Shawn Simon, MA, is a Board Certified Educational Therapist who works with children. Therefore, when she met the man of her dreams, who just happened to come with a couple of kids, she thought being a stepmom would be a breeze. She was wrong. However, as someone born with only one arm, she’s learned to overcome obstacles. Thus, she knew she could f…
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Perhaps our most important episode of the year, this one is fully dedicated to talking about all things Mother's Day (after a brief 4-min awkward story from Bailey). We talk about how to set proper expectations for yourself, your partner, and your stepkids for the day. We share our own feelings around gift-giving, being a childless stepmom celebrat…
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In this episode, we review a story from stepmom "Mrs. M" who has dealt with more than her fair share of insanity during her stepmom journey thus far. From stalking to restraining orders, name-calling, and insane manipulation - how do you even survive this as a stepmom? We share our advice on how, despite all the crazy in her world, she can bond wit…
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In this episode we welcome guest, Megan McLaren. Megan resides in Alberta and is a mom to twins, stepmom, social worker, and certified life coach. We tlk through Megan's experience as a stepmom and how she overcame grief and grieving the life she never got to have. She missed out on being the first wife, the first birthing experience, and many othe…
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During this episode, we read a situation from one of our very own stepmom friends who is dealing with a tough situation all around. Between feeling like a stranger in her own home, constantly walking on eggshells, a High Conflict Bio Mom (HCBM) to deal with, and a stepdaughter who is lashing out behaviorally, she's drained. We walk you through her …
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This episode is all about the hottest topic now in the stepmom community: DOUBLE STANDARDS. Why is it that we rally around a parent who says "I need a break" but criticize a stepmom for saying the same thing? Whether it's being able to say "mom things", attending doctor's appointments or sporting events, or simply being welcomed into a "mom" commun…
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In this episode, we read a submission from a stepmom struggling with the relationship her husband has with his ex. We unpack her story and ask ourselves where the lines are: how close is TOO close? When do you have the right to feel uncomfortable (spoiler: you have the right to feel uncomfortable whenever you please)?…
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This episode digs into all things disrespect-related. Maybe your stepkid makes your home a living hell. Maybe they talk down to you. Maybe they don't respect your boundaries. Hear from Bailey and Alyse how to handle this, how to prevent it, and how another stepmom has handled this herself.By Stepmoms Bailey & Alyse
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This episode is a mini from a stepmom submission who is dealing with an extreme scenario. In this case, the biomom is actually a therapist (won't be referring anyone to her after hearing this), but is severely manipulating her kids to actively dislike the stepmom. Between inappropriate messages to her ex, saying things that aren't true, and activel…
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In this episode, we welcome guest Cheryl (who also happens to be Bailey's momma). Cheryl has been what we'll call sandwiched right in the middle of a blended family - having been through a divorce herself, having full custody of her daughter, and dealing with what it's like to have a kid switch between two DRAMATICALLY different households. She als…
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*TRIGGER WARNING: EMOTIONAL ABUSE* In this episode, we read a submission from a stepmom in a tough situation. With a partner who struggles with addiction and often lashes out at the kids and her, and who tries to put the stepmom in a situation where she is a supervising party to court-mandated supervised visits. We try to pick through the informati…
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Kelly and Angelina are unlike any stepmom and biomom duo we've met to date. Their relationship didn't start out with hugs and mutual respect. It took a lot of self-awareness, work, and reflection from each of them to get to the point where they could successfully co-parent the same kids together. Sure, it could be awkward that Kelly is married to A…
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Our mini-episodes are entirely dedicated to sharing YOUR story. Each episode features one submission from our followers where we read the situation and give our take. Here is this week's submission: So my main complaint for years now has been the fact that his family was so happy that I came into their son's life. They saw a light they had never se…
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This episode is all about financial considerations in a stepmom role. We discuss everything from a stepmom's obligation to contribute financially (or not), sharing expenses such as clothing and extra-curricular activities, and even wills and estate planning with stepkids involved. Here's a full breakdown: 0:00 - 4:55 - Catch up, wine adventures, od…
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Our mini-episodes are entirely dedicated to sharing YOUR story. Each episode features one submission from our followers where we read the situation and give our take. In this episode, we unpack a complicated situation where there is no court order in place and a biomom who seems to want to make changes on the fly that are convenient for her. This s…
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Parental Alienation is defined as "something which primarily occurs during a high-conflict divorce in which the child identifies strongly with one parent, usually the custodial parent. The other parent is hated and rejected without any justifiable reason, such as abuse." (Source: WebMD). If you have ever found yourself asking any of these questions…
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In this episode, we have a special guest! Bailey's 25-year-old brother Austin joins us. Austin was diagnosed with ADHD at age 7, and Asperger's Syndrome (now formally called Autism Spectrum Disorder) at age 14. He gives us all a glimpse into his childhood journey and discusses the challenges he had in school, making friends, and even now as an adul…
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In this episode, we talk a lot about being the strict house or the uncool house, and the major differences between parallel parenting, co-parenting, and counter-parenting. Here are some time-stamped topics: 0:00-6:00: Alyse & Bailey catch up, discuss this weekend's AZ stepmom happy hour, and discuss cocktails. 6:00-9:35:The differences between para…
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Episode topic guide: Custody & Evaluations [3:00] Stepmom Involvement & Rights [5:34] How Koryn's perspective as a family law attorney has changed since becoming a stepmom [9:30] Schedule Changes, Schedule Rule Breakers [13:50] Changing Custody Agreements [18:00] Household & Value Differences vs. Legal Problems [23:50] When Kids Can Give Input on W…
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*DISCLAIMER* This episode is NOT legal advice and is not to take the place of any conversations with an attorney. This information is simply a perspective from a fellow stepmom. For advice on how to handle your specific situation, please contact a licensed attorney in your state. Now for the fun stuff: In this episode, we talk with Alex, a newly ma…
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In this episode, we unpack the idea of disengaging (together in person for the first time!). The how, the why, the when. With the kids, with the bio mom, or even with parenting in your own house. We also touch on how to handle disagreements in parenting with your SO, and share how we have handled those conversations in the past (with care... and so…
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We've all dealt with some kind of insecurities in our lives, especially in a stepmom role. In this episode, we touch on feedback directly from followers on how they've felt uncertain and insecure. We give you our best advice on how to handle feeling compared, how to be more confident in your role, and how to earn the respect of your stepkids.…
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So many of us wish we knew what it was like to walk a mile in our stepkids' shoes or just hear raw and real feelings from the horse's mouth. What should we do? What should we avoid? What are things we do to make their lives harder or easier? What were the most awkward moments about being in a blended family growing up? Now, you get the chance. Meet…
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Mother's Day gives us mixed feelings. For some of us, it's a day of celebration and time with our family. For others, it's a day filled with sadness and disappointment. With two diverse dynamics, Alyse and Bailey explore Mother's Day both as a stepmom with an "ours" baby and as a childless stepmom. Most importantly, we give YOUR feedback and feelin…
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In this episode, a good friend and fellow stepmom Kali joins us to discuss how she dealt with becoming an InstaMOMMY to her 4 stepkids when she and her husband met, followed by having a child of her own. She also shares with us (and luckily all of you) how she has managed to have a great relationship with the bio mom in her life. Having a great rel…
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Being a parent to any kid is rewarding and hard all at the same time. But the teenage years? Buckle up, babes. In this episode, we share some of the best stories from our stepkids' teenage years, talk about the challenges with step-parenting and cell phones, social media, ETC. Join us for a few laughs, a few "oh my gosh she did not" moments, and ou…
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We had the pleasure of having Joslynn Flowers, host of the Daily Stepmom Podcast on this episode, and it was wonderful! Joslynn is a full-time stepmom and brings a different perspective to our listeners. We let all our guards down and talked about disciplining your stepkids, feeling resent as a stepmom, homeschooling during COVID, feeling like an o…
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This episode is packed full of fun. We'll start off by Bailey finally sharing what her step-daughter found in one of her tampon boxes (WOOPS! Parenting high over here...). Additionally, have you ever been curious as to whether or not being a stepDAD is just as hard as being a stepMOM? We were too! In this episode, you get the chance to meet Bailey'…
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Listen - haters are inevitable as a stepmom. It might be the bio mom who hates you simply for marrying her ex, it might be the kids who resent you for trying to be their new mom, it may even be your husband's family, or anyone in the world. They feel justified in their feelings and we are here to tell you how we handle it all. You can't please ever…
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In this episode we deep-dive into the different communication styles Alyse and Bailey have (or don't have) with the bio-mom. We talk through co-parenting challenges, how we handle birthdays, sporting events, and holidays... and most importantly: how we stay sane through it all.By Stepmoms Bailey & Alyse
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