Jan de Bont’s remake of the 1963 Robert Wise classic promised to take The Haunting of Hill House into the new millennium, boasting state of the art special effects and an A-list cast. Unfortunately it also boasted a clunky script, ridiculous production design and CGI overload that robbed Shirley Jackson’s seminal ghost story of all of its terror an…

Riding high off of their Lethal Weapon partnership, filmmaker Richard Donner and star Mel Gibson had every reason to believe their high concept action thriller Conspiracy Theory would be a success. And with the help of superstar Julia Roberts, a villainous turn by Patrick Stewart and a script by Oscar winner Brian Helgeland, it was, at least modest…

Fans of the 20th Century Fox mutant superhero series were anxious to see the backstory of fan-favorite character Wolverine explained, so Gavin Hood’s prequel X-Men Origins: Wolverine landed with a box office bang in 2009. But despite a successful financial run, the film was lambasted by fans and critics for its shoddy special effects, mistreatment …

George Miller’s gonzo, post apocalyptic masterpiece Mad Max: Fury Road stunned audiences in 2015, earning widespread praise and cult status. But despite that goodwill, strong reviews and the presence of stars Anya Taylor Joy and Chris Hemsworth, Miller’s prequel Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga stalled terribly at the box office this Memorial Day. Join Seba…

Based loosely on an 80s TV series, David Leitch’s stunt driven action rom com The Fall Guy was positioned to catapult Ryan Gosling’s post Barbie heat into the superstar stratosphere. But despite a winning turn from Gosling, co-star Emily Blunt and an array of comedic, dazzling stunt sequences, the film’s Hollywood insider trappings failed to transl…

Based on an obscure comicbook character, Madame Web hoped to cash in on the goodwill of the tangentially related Marvel Cinematic Universe as well as the success of the animated Spiderverse films. But the Sony produced movie was ensnared in toxic buzz from the outset, the goofy trailers and mocking reviews ensuring that it would be yet another bomb…

Before Marvel’s Avengers became a household name, there was the quirky 1960’s British spy series made popular by the presence of Diana Rigg in a cat suit. More than thirty years past the show’s prime a big budget feature film was attempted, but despite the presence of OG James Bond Sean Connery, Ralph Fiennes and a post Batman & Robin Uma Thurman d…

Henry Cavill may be a fan favorite choice for Bond, but his forays into the super spy game have met with largely lackluster box office results. This has proven especially true for Argylle, director Matthew Vaughn’s Romancing the Stone riff that left Cavill fans unsatisfied and baffled most audiences and critics. Join Sebastian and Whiskey with Witc…

Hollywood had been looking to get the Planet of the Apes franchise back into orbit for 20 plus years, but it wasn’t until Tim Burton signed on to direct that the 2001 remake took sh(ape). But despite boasting incredible Rick Baker makeups, Marky Mark as the lead human and an impressive box office haul, the reaction to the film was so toxic that 20t…

Coming strong after the one-two punch of The Terminator and Aliens, director James Cameron was poised to reach A-level status with his wildly ambitious underwater sci fi action film The Abyss. But despite overcoming a torturous and fraught-filled production, the would-be blockbuster left audiences confused upon its 1989 theatrical release and did n…

After the billion dollar success of Captain Marvel, a sequel to the Brie Larson led superhero hit seemed destined for the stars. But even with the power of Marvel studios and Disney behind it, not to mention the addition of the characters of Ms. Marvel and Monica Rambeau, Nia DaCosta’s 220 million dollar team-up didn’t even make its budget back wor…

Special effects wizard Douglas Trumbull hoped to bring his mind-bending 2001: A Space Odyssey visuals down to earth with Brainstorm, a 1983 sci fi thriller starring Christopher Walken and Natalie Wood. Unfortunately Wood’s tragic death by drowning cast a pall over the film, delaying its release and resulting in a muddled narrative and baffling spec…

Russell Crowe returning to the historical epic genre at the peak of his post-Gladiator fame would seem a sure bet in 2003, and yet Peter Weir’s Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World met with a tepid box office response upon its maiden voyage. Despite being an exquisitely crafted adaptation of the beloved Patrick O’Brian novels and garneri…

Probably no one would have predicted that in 2023 the duo behind Game Night would deliver the definitive cinematic take on the genre-defining TRS role playing game Dungeons & Dragons, and yet John Francis Daley and Jonathan Goldstein’s Honor Among Thieves managed that seemingly impossible task. But despite a great cast, a clever and funny script an…

The late 90s saw horror in a transitional phase, and while the trend was favoring the post-modern tact of Scream, many filmmakers were taking their end-of-the-millennium angst to the stars. Despite being arguably the best of the spacefaring bunch, Paul W.S. Anderson’s Event Horizon failed to conjure excitement with critics and quickly fell into a b…

In the wake of the meteoric success of Star Wars (and several decades before owning the franchise) Disney tried their hand at big budget space adventure with The Black Hole. But despite boasting impressive special effects and a promising premise, the movie’s dark tone, haunted house shenanigans and muddled science left audiences drifting in a void …

After acquiring Lucasfilm in 2012, Disney was banking big on a 5th installment of the beloved and lucrative Indiana Jones franchise. After years of development and the passing of the torch from original director Steven Spielberg to the capable James Mangold, Harrison Ford — now in his late 70s — agreed to don the whip and fedora for one last advent…

The first superhero film to emphasize Latino representation, Angel Manuel Soto's Blue Beetle was so well received by Warner Brothers executives that it was spared a straight-to streaming fate and awarded a theatrical release. But despite the presence of Cobra Kai's Xolo Mariduena, Latino comedian Geoge Lopez and Susan Sarandon in the villain role, …

Despite being released a mere six months after the hit western Tombstone, Kevin Costner was confident that his telling of the Wyatt Earp story, with director Lawrence Kasdan in tow, would be the definitive take on the legendary lawman. But the film’s epic length and self-serious tone met with tepid critical reception despite strong performances, an…

Trick or treat motherf**ker! After the triumphant return of Jamie Lee Curtis and the cathartic killing of Michael Myers in 1998’s H20, there was nowhere to go but down. Unfortunately, Rick Rosenthal’s 2002 follow-up failed to meet even the lowest of fan expectations with an ignominious death for Laurie Stride, a terrible Blair Witch inspired premis…

Though not a hit upon release, Frank Darabont’s adaptation of Stephen King’s The Shawshank Redemption was a beloved classic by the mid aughts, so hopes were high that the director’s post Green Mile return to King territory with 2007’s The Mist would deliver. And though critics were kind to the bleak, apocalyptic creature-fest, audience reaction and…

Sports movies enjoyed a renaissance in the 90s, so it was all but inevitable that by the year 2000 rising superstar Will Smith would get his shot at starring in one. Unfortunately, The Legend of Bagger Vance, directed by Robert Redford and co-starring Matt Damon and Charlize Theron, weathered criticism for its liberal use of problematic racial trop…

Hopes were high for bringing DC comics’ preeminent scarlet speedster to the big screen, and the addition of Michael Keaton — returning to the role of Batman — only added fuel to the pre-release hype. But a deeply troubled leading man and countless delays decelerated the excitement, resulting in one of the biggest box office flops of the 2023 blockb…

Before landing the job of running the revamped DC cinematic universe, auteur James Gunn jumped ship from Marvel to direct The Suicide Squad, a sequel to the 2016 film of (almost) the same name. Bringing with him his unique blend of twisted heart and humor, as well as a penchant for D-list comic book characters, Gunn’s film landed well with fans but…

The original Speed was a huge hit that cemented Keanu Reeves as an action hero and made a star of Sandra Bullock, so naturally the studio and director Jan de Bont were eager to get the band back together for the sequel. But Keanu didn’t return, leaving Sandy to shoulder Speed 2: Cruise Control with replacement Jason Patric, new villain Willem Dafoe…

Despite the fact that the door seemed to be closed on the Indiana Jones series, creators George Lucas and Steven Spielberg, along with star Harrison Ford, decided to don the iconic hat and whip for a fourth entry with 2008’s Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. And while the film was financially successful, fans roundly rejected itsc…

Horror remakes were all the rage by the mid 2000s, so a remake of the seminal folk horror classic The Wicker Man was all but inevitable. Armed with a crazy Nic Cage performance and seasoned indie director Neil LaBute at the helm, the 2006 reimagining was set to catch fire at the box office but fizzled instead, failing to justify its hefty 40 millio…

H.G. Wells’ tale of genetic tampering had been adapted for the big screen before Richard Stanley attempted it again in 1996, but never before had a version gone so horribly awry. Plagued by misbehaving stars Val Kilmer and Marlon Brando, Stanley himself being fired and replaced by veteran director John Frankenheimer, and numerous onset mishaps, the…

The stardom of both Henry Cavill and cannibal fetishist Armie Hammer was on the rise in 2015, making it the perfect time to team them up in a buddy spy movie directed by Guy Ritchie. But despite a solid effort, a groovy 60’s period setting and the always beguiling Alicia Vikander, this re-imaging of the cult TV show cried uncle at the box office. J…

Val Kilmer was riding high as a leading man in 1997, so it made sense that he’d try his hand at establishing his own globetrotting espionage role. Sadly the resulting reimagining of the 60s British TV sensation The Saint turned out more Boring Identity than Bond, torpedoing a potential franchise and setting Kilmer’s career into a funk from which it…

The Scream franchise may have been dormant for over ten years, but hopes were still high for Wes Craven and company’s 2011 remake-era reboot, Scream 4. But despite returning stars Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox and David Arquette, as well as a promising new cast, the film failed to scare up significant returns at the box office. Join Sebastian, Jenni…

Based on the beloved Nintendo side scroller, the 1993 live action Super Mario Bros. movie was poised to prove the viability of video games making the jump to the big screen. Sadly, despite boasting the talents of Bob Hoskins, John Leguizamo, Samantha Mathis and Dennis Hopper, as well as big budget special effects, the film laid a dinosaur-sized egg…

An adaptation of TSR’s seminal role playing was long in the cards, or the 20 sided dice as it were, but it wasn’t until the year 2000 that the first big screen effort was launched. Unfortunately Courtney Solomon’s Dungeons and Dragons was a catastrophic misfire marred by hammy performances, poor scripting and monstrously bad CGI, bombing hard at th…

The television phenomenon of Twin Peaks had cooled by 1992, but that didn’t stop creator and arthouse darling David Lynch from directing a theatrical prequel, Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me. The reaction was less than enthusiastic; critics couldn’t make sense of Lynch’s unconventional narrative, and fans of the show were upset by the lack of charact…

Fair is fair! Teenage rebellion and MTV were all the rage in the 80s, so it was only natural that a film would come along to capitalize on both trends and become a box office sensation. Sadly, Matthew Robbins’ The Legend of Billie Jean, starring hot young newcomers Helen and Christian Slater, was not that film. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they s…

With a director at the height of his game and a star at the early peak of his fame, Blow Out, directed by Brian De Palma and starring John Travolta, was poised to be one of the big hits of 1981. But despite being a rock solid re-imagining of Michelangelo Antonioni’s Blow Up and a nail-biting thriller in its own right, the film blew a flat tire at t…

The 90s saw a resurgence in the western genre, though none of the many offerings outside of Clint Eastwood’s Unforgiven were major hits. Unfortunately that held true for Mario Van Peebles’ Posse, which distinguished itself by featuring a mostly black cast and was the star/director’s follow up to his enormously successful New Jack City. Join Sebasti…

Not to be confused with the 90s death cult of the same name, Michael Cimino’s Heaven’s Gate, was, for a time, synonymous with the words “box office bomb”. Credited with ending the auteur driven studio system of the 70s, the Oscar winning director’s epic western was an exercise in excess, from the wildly bloated budget, to the interminable running t…

A favorite among the board gaming set, Parker Brother’s Clue, with its parlor mystery whodunnit premise, seemed a natural fit for a big screen adaptation. But despite being armed with an all-star cast of top shelf comedic talent, the film failed to generate intrigue from audiences and critics, resulting in a box office flop. Join Sebastian and EnCL…

Stephen King's The Dark Tower fantasy series has been a long-gestating white whale project in Hollywood, passing through countless development hands and having many promising false starts. Hopes were high when a feature film finally came to fruition in 2017 starring Idris Elba as the heroic Gunslinger and Matthew McConaughey as his Man in Black nem…

Madman director Paul Verhoeven was riding high off of several blockbuster successes when he re-teamed with Basic Instinct writer and fellow madman Joe Ezterhaus for a film about the sordid lives of Las Vegas showgirls. Their resulting collaboration, 1995’s Showgirls, was met with resounding box office failure and critical derision, tanking the care…

He-Man and the Masters of the Universe may have been past their prime by 1987, but that didn’t stop shlockmeisters Golan and Globus from capitalizing on the popular toy and cartoon property by attempting a big budget film adaptation. Despite casting a near-perfect He-Man in Dolph Lundgren and boasting up and comer Courteney Cox, as well as a deligh…

Spirits were high for A list screenwriter David Koepp’s sophomore directorial outing, an adaptation of the Richard Matheson short story A Stir of Echoes. But despite the presence of leading man Kevin Bacon, the film’s release was six degrees too close to another mega hit ghost story with a similar premise, burying Koepp’s otherwise solid effort in …

Following the high profile failure of Lady In the Water, famed director M. Night Shyamalan ignored the naysayers and doubled down on absurd high concepts with 2008’s The Happening. The results were resoundingly mocked by fans and critics alike, dragging down the director’s already sinking reputation, as well as the careers of leads Mark Wahlberg an…

It’s a post Christmas miracle from Pandora — Tentpole Trauma sees you, and you’ve been very nice this year, so as a gift we give you this month’s Tentpole Triumph discussion of Avatar as a bonus episode! Join Sebastian, Chris and Rodney as they finally hash it out over the #1 box office champ of all time, director James Cameron and what they antici…

Many expected that James Cameron’s long promised adaptation of the famed manga Battle Angel Alita would never materialize, but when the megastar director conceded the reigns to Robert Rodriguez, the project was at last brought to life. Sadly, the uncanny valley effect of the film’s bug-eyed CG protagonist did not entice large audiences, and while w…

How do you follow up the wildly successful original Star Wars trilogy? If you’re George Lucas, you get your buddy Ron Howard to direct a Lord of the Rings riff starring Val Kilmer and the actor who played the lead Ewok in Return of the Jedi! The resulting film, 1988’s curiously titled Willow, did not conjure magic at the box office, but has engende…

Director John Boorman was riding high off the success of Deliverance in 1974, but when he couldn’t get his adaptation of Lord of the Rings off of the ground, he opted instead for a mind-bending journey into sci fi with his bizarre vision of the future, Zardoz. 20th Century Fox hoped they had another 2001: A Space Odyssey or Planet of the Apes on th…

The Blade franchise was rolling full force when the third entry, helmed by writer David S. Goyer, hit theaters in 2004. Rumors of star Wesley Snipes’ unhappiness with the franchise’s new direction — namely adding hot young stars Ryan Reynolds and Jessica Biel to the cast as usurping vampire hunters — plagued the production, and the resulting film f…

Hopes were high for celebrated Canadian auteur David Cronenberg’s return to the body horror genre he all but originated, and the trailers for his 2022 film Crimes of the Future promised serious sci fi weirdness. But despite a strong showing on the festival circuit, the film disappointed many fans and didn’t make the cut at the box office. Join Seba…