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Return to "traditional' with Tex
Manage episode 312045898 series 3218709
Tex joins us to talk about re-igniting his marriage through a return to more "traditional" roles. Hitting on the "dom/sub" relationship he has with his wife and his journey to help young men lead better.
Where to find Tex?
- Twitter https://twitter.com/TexasDom1
- Blog Link https://texasdom.com/bio/
Transcription below (May contain typos...):
Mike: [00:00:00] [00:00:00] today we got texts on the show. Texas is from Texas, he's an author. Um, and he writes a lot about masculinity and about, um, I think the Renaissance of, uh, or the resurgence of masculinity that we're seeing in the world today.
Um, in some of these circles, you know, it's kind of under the, the mainstream radar, but it's, it's a response to what's going on and, and texts. I love. The stuff that you put out and I love your story and I'm excited to have you share it with my audience, man.
Tex: [00:00:28] Well, thank you for having me on. I appreciate it.
Yeah,
Mike: [00:00:31] well, um, let's get into, uh, you know, one of the things I like to start sometimes when my podcast with interview with is, um, I'm curious because this is a fatherhood podcast. If a young young man came to you was married having their first kid and they said texts. I need some advice. I don't know what the hell I'm doing.
My wife is pregnant. What are some advice you can give me being a new dad?
Tex: [00:00:58] Be patient, um, [00:01:00] be, be, be loving and, um, realize there's no owner's manual and you're going to screw some stuff up and you're going to figure it out along the way. By the time you get to kid two and three and four, it's going to be so much easier.
And, um, you know, don't, don't worry about the fact that you think you can't afford a baby or a second or third. Um, no one can, so we just figure it out, you know, that's how we do it. And you realized that, um, when your wife does have this baby, she's going to go through some hormonal changes, right. As you know, as you're leading up to it during, and then right after, and she is going to be out of her mind and some things, and you're going to look at her and go, who is this woman sometimes.
Right. And, but that's going to happen. I mean, it happens to most people. And so, you know, hopefully you can avoid the whole post postpartum depression and all that stuff. Just be, just be kind. Be loving and, uh, and not saying be your slave. I'm not saying, you know, be her fetching boy, I'm just saying no, that her emotions are going to be all over the map [00:02:00] and it's up to you to be calm and to just be a little stoic and just love her when she needs to be loved.
Yeah.
Mike: [00:02:09] The perspective glasses you got to put on? I think I'm finally learning that after we were having our fifth, you know, pretty soon. And it's like, man, I'm finally learning that lesson. Okay. She's probably of
Tex: [00:02:19] five kids, man. Can't imagine five kids. Good Lord. I got three grandsons when they come down to visit twice at the beach this summer and.
After about where they were like eight days, both times. Right. And I'm like, Ooh, man, these guys are work. I forgot how much work this was. And they were like 12, 10 and seven. So they're, they're just constantly, even their motors are running the whole time. Right. So, uh, yeah, I realized I, that was the only thing I regret.
I didn't have enough kids, man. I only had, we stopped at two and I wish we'd had more. Now I look back at that and go, I, that was, uh, and, and what was it? It was, you know, stressful. Yeah, we were broke. We were poor. We were broke. And I managed to convince myself that having [00:03:00] more kids was a really, really bad idea.
And my wife and I were both in agreement of that. We're like, yeah, we're, we're done. I mean, yeah, she wasn't even 30. When she had our second kid, we could have had plenty of time to have, you know, at least one or two more. So
Mike: [00:03:13] that is funny that you, you rarely hear people say they, you hear people often say they wish they had more.
Not that they had too many, you know, it's often that
Tex: [00:03:24] it depends on if you got that one. That's totally screw up at age 40. Oh yeah. I wish I hadn't had that one. Oh, no, they don't say that. They don't say that they think that, but they don't say that. They'll say it. Somebody said the other day, um, one of my friends online.
So it's something about how amazing it was to be able to, uh, use your phone, to text message money to your kids. And I replied back. Yeah, well not when they're 36. No, that's not cool. That's right.
Mike: [00:03:54] They know it's just a text message away so they can just text you for it.
Tex: [00:03:58] That's it never make it [00:04:00] to you. I'm writing
Mike: [00:04:02] though.
It's funny. You talk about, um, the stress of having young kids and, and, and even just the perspective of having a pregnant wife and keeping that in perspective. And that's, that's a huge lesson. I don't stress that enough with friends that are having kids later than me, but, um, Just the energy level. I mean, you sounded like my dad, when you were saying about being tired, they watch the kids for like a weekend might ask, like, I'm, I'm beat, man.
I'm like, you had him for like two days.
Tex: [00:04:27] Good luck.
Mike: [00:04:27] You know?
Tex: [00:04:29] So the third part of that is we feed them. We don't probably don't feed them the right stuff. We'll give them way too many. Cookies and sugar and we suffer the consequences of that, but I'm just glad I had them when it w you know, my daughter ended up having kids when she did, because I'm only 59.
Right. I can still go do stuff, go fishing with a run on the beach with them, that kind of thing. You know, I'm not 80 something into rolling out the side of my mouth and telling them to go away, you know? And that's, that's, that's a blessing. That's the problem I see with these guys. Oh, I'm going to wait until I'm 50 to have kids.
Really. You could be 70 when they get out of it, you know, when they go into college or [00:05:00] something, you know, you don't really want that. I mean, is that really what you're after?
Mike: [00:05:03] Yeah. Yeah. Well, Hey, I know you, um, you have blog, right? You talk about some of these topics, but one of them stems around your journey with, um, your in, in your marriage, where you had a, it sounded like, you know, a transformational moment where you embraced a dominant, submissive, um, you know, lifestyle.
And to me that, the interesting thing about me about that with me was that, um, It is conveyed. And I think a negative light or a, not an appropriate light, you know, in, you know, 50 shades of gray or whatever you want to call it. That's out there in the mainstream. That's totally different, but I'm a, I'm a believer.
So, you know, in terms of being a view in the demand is the head of the house and, and some of the traditional values, there's so much wisdom there that me and my wife had that. You know, relationship and that those roles. And what was interesting to me was some of the stories you hear from guys and from fathers and husbands, that when their [00:06:00] kids move out of the...
71 episodes
Manage episode 312045898 series 3218709
Tex joins us to talk about re-igniting his marriage through a return to more "traditional" roles. Hitting on the "dom/sub" relationship he has with his wife and his journey to help young men lead better.
Where to find Tex?
- Twitter https://twitter.com/TexasDom1
- Blog Link https://texasdom.com/bio/
Transcription below (May contain typos...):
Mike: [00:00:00] [00:00:00] today we got texts on the show. Texas is from Texas, he's an author. Um, and he writes a lot about masculinity and about, um, I think the Renaissance of, uh, or the resurgence of masculinity that we're seeing in the world today.
Um, in some of these circles, you know, it's kind of under the, the mainstream radar, but it's, it's a response to what's going on and, and texts. I love. The stuff that you put out and I love your story and I'm excited to have you share it with my audience, man.
Tex: [00:00:28] Well, thank you for having me on. I appreciate it.
Yeah,
Mike: [00:00:31] well, um, let's get into, uh, you know, one of the things I like to start sometimes when my podcast with interview with is, um, I'm curious because this is a fatherhood podcast. If a young young man came to you was married having their first kid and they said texts. I need some advice. I don't know what the hell I'm doing.
My wife is pregnant. What are some advice you can give me being a new dad?
Tex: [00:00:58] Be patient, um, [00:01:00] be, be, be loving and, um, realize there's no owner's manual and you're going to screw some stuff up and you're going to figure it out along the way. By the time you get to kid two and three and four, it's going to be so much easier.
And, um, you know, don't, don't worry about the fact that you think you can't afford a baby or a second or third. Um, no one can, so we just figure it out, you know, that's how we do it. And you realized that, um, when your wife does have this baby, she's going to go through some hormonal changes, right. As you know, as you're leading up to it during, and then right after, and she is going to be out of her mind and some things, and you're going to look at her and go, who is this woman sometimes.
Right. And, but that's going to happen. I mean, it happens to most people. And so, you know, hopefully you can avoid the whole post postpartum depression and all that stuff. Just be, just be kind. Be loving and, uh, and not saying be your slave. I'm not saying, you know, be her fetching boy, I'm just saying no, that her emotions are going to be all over the map [00:02:00] and it's up to you to be calm and to just be a little stoic and just love her when she needs to be loved.
Yeah.
Mike: [00:02:09] The perspective glasses you got to put on? I think I'm finally learning that after we were having our fifth, you know, pretty soon. And it's like, man, I'm finally learning that lesson. Okay. She's probably of
Tex: [00:02:19] five kids, man. Can't imagine five kids. Good Lord. I got three grandsons when they come down to visit twice at the beach this summer and.
After about where they were like eight days, both times. Right. And I'm like, Ooh, man, these guys are work. I forgot how much work this was. And they were like 12, 10 and seven. So they're, they're just constantly, even their motors are running the whole time. Right. So, uh, yeah, I realized I, that was the only thing I regret.
I didn't have enough kids, man. I only had, we stopped at two and I wish we'd had more. Now I look back at that and go, I, that was, uh, and, and what was it? It was, you know, stressful. Yeah, we were broke. We were poor. We were broke. And I managed to convince myself that having [00:03:00] more kids was a really, really bad idea.
And my wife and I were both in agreement of that. We're like, yeah, we're, we're done. I mean, yeah, she wasn't even 30. When she had our second kid, we could have had plenty of time to have, you know, at least one or two more. So
Mike: [00:03:13] that is funny that you, you rarely hear people say they, you hear people often say they wish they had more.
Not that they had too many, you know, it's often that
Tex: [00:03:24] it depends on if you got that one. That's totally screw up at age 40. Oh yeah. I wish I hadn't had that one. Oh, no, they don't say that. They don't say that they think that, but they don't say that. They'll say it. Somebody said the other day, um, one of my friends online.
So it's something about how amazing it was to be able to, uh, use your phone, to text message money to your kids. And I replied back. Yeah, well not when they're 36. No, that's not cool. That's right.
Mike: [00:03:54] They know it's just a text message away so they can just text you for it.
Tex: [00:03:58] That's it never make it [00:04:00] to you. I'm writing
Mike: [00:04:02] though.
It's funny. You talk about, um, the stress of having young kids and, and, and even just the perspective of having a pregnant wife and keeping that in perspective. And that's, that's a huge lesson. I don't stress that enough with friends that are having kids later than me, but, um, Just the energy level. I mean, you sounded like my dad, when you were saying about being tired, they watch the kids for like a weekend might ask, like, I'm, I'm beat, man.
I'm like, you had him for like two days.
Tex: [00:04:27] Good luck.
Mike: [00:04:27] You know?
Tex: [00:04:29] So the third part of that is we feed them. We don't probably don't feed them the right stuff. We'll give them way too many. Cookies and sugar and we suffer the consequences of that, but I'm just glad I had them when it w you know, my daughter ended up having kids when she did, because I'm only 59.
Right. I can still go do stuff, go fishing with a run on the beach with them, that kind of thing. You know, I'm not 80 something into rolling out the side of my mouth and telling them to go away, you know? And that's, that's, that's a blessing. That's the problem I see with these guys. Oh, I'm going to wait until I'm 50 to have kids.
Really. You could be 70 when they get out of it, you know, when they go into college or [00:05:00] something, you know, you don't really want that. I mean, is that really what you're after?
Mike: [00:05:03] Yeah. Yeah. Well, Hey, I know you, um, you have blog, right? You talk about some of these topics, but one of them stems around your journey with, um, your in, in your marriage, where you had a, it sounded like, you know, a transformational moment where you embraced a dominant, submissive, um, you know, lifestyle.
And to me that, the interesting thing about me about that with me was that, um, It is conveyed. And I think a negative light or a, not an appropriate light, you know, in, you know, 50 shades of gray or whatever you want to call it. That's out there in the mainstream. That's totally different, but I'm a, I'm a believer.
So, you know, in terms of being a view in the demand is the head of the house and, and some of the traditional values, there's so much wisdom there that me and my wife had that. You know, relationship and that those roles. And what was interesting to me was some of the stories you hear from guys and from fathers and husbands, that when their [00:06:00] kids move out of the...
71 episodes
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