Speeding Ticket (4/365)
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A female business executive is late for a meeting and is going 65 on a street where the speed limit is 40. A cop pulls her over and says, "Ma'am, can I please see your license?" She replies, "Sorry officer, but it got revoked two years ago for drunk driving." He furrows his brow and asks, "Well in that case can I see the registration and insurance for the car?" She replies, "I stole the car and killed the driver, he's in the trunk." The officer immediately reacts and calls his captain for backup. Five minutes later, half of the local police squad pulls up and the Captain walks over to the woman's window. "Ma'am, may I please see your license?", he asks sternly. She replies, "Of course, officer," pulling her license from her purse. He squints warily at the license, "OK. Can I see the registration to this car?" She pulls the registration and proof of insurance out of the glove box and hands it to him. He suddenly bursts out, "Ma'am, please open your trunk!". She does so, and the captain looks in, sees no body, and says "I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, killed the driver and the dead body was in the trunk. To which the woman responds: "Yeah, I'll bet the liar told you I was speeding, too."
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