Chris' story: getting on, not moving on

About Death

Rather than moving on after a loved one died, what if you thought about getting on? That's how Chris has been thinking about life after his late wife, Kate, died in 2016. Chris and Kate always believed that whatever cards you've been dealt in life, you have to play them as best you can. For them, that meant having some difficult conversations earlier than they could have ever imagined. But talking about death meant they knew what was important to each about living and dying, as well as what life for Chris might look like after Kate died.

Welcome to Chris' story.

Hosted by: Sam Meikle

Produced by: Spark the Difference

Show notes

Here’s what Chris shares in this conversation:

00:09 These conversations are all real and can sometimes be a bit raw. You can always pause and take a break for a bit.

04:12 Remembering how Chris' family came together for each other when his Granddad died

07:02 There will always be elements of grief, sadness and reflection, but also happiness for the times you had with them

09:48 We're all different humans and there's no one right way to think, feel or talk about death

11:30 Chris reflects that preparing for a death when you know it's going to happen, can be easier than a sudden death

14:04 Chris remembers listening to Kate talk about death through her work as a doctor, before she was ill

15:56 The first conversation Chris had with Kate about her plans for death

17:58 How having a dark sense of humour about death helped Chris and Kate

18:54 Nine times of out ten, conversations about death were started by Kate

21:13 Chris shares some ideas for starting to talk about death, such as: "have you got a will?"

26:19 Highly recommended: having a Bucket List to help you focus on doing things that are important to you

30:19 How Chris' Bucket List helps him think about life now

33:13 Each of us can have an impact on other people's lives

35:36 The #hellomynameis campaign: it’s about two humans beings talking to each other

39:00 Life after death: getting on rather than moving on

45:16 You might only get one chance to have that conversation. So make sure you have that conversation.

A note on looking after ourselves: these conversations are all real and can feel a little raw. If you’re struggling with the content that we’re talking about, please seek support. This might be from a trusted family member or friend. The Samaritans Team are always available to talk and you can contact them on 116 123.