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79: Beyond "Yes": Breaking the Cycle of People-Pleasing as a Trauma Response with Matthias Barker

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Content provided by Do The Work. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Do The Work or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.
Sabrina sits down with Matthias Barker for a second time to dive into the detrimental effects of people-pleasing, a common trauma response where individuals regulate others to feel safe themselves. Unlike genuine empathy, people-pleasing stems from fear and often involves manipulation. Barker emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and confronting dysfunction rather than avoiding it, as true safety doesn't come from constant monitoring out of fear. He advises distinguishing between needs and anxiety, advocating for acceptance and mutual attunement in relationships. Personal experiences shared by both Sabrina and Barker highlight the necessity of building a solid relationship foundation, addressing big emotions, and helping partners express their needs authentically without resorting to people-pleasing behaviors.
Snag Sabrina's 8 week course HERE!
Get Ad free and 2 Bonus episodes a month HERE!
Want to work with Sabrina? HERE!
Don't forget to follow Sabrina and Do the Work on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE!
Please support our sponsors!
Go 20% off your first order and free shipping with Chomps HERE!
Save $10 on your first purchase at StoryWorth HERE!
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  continue reading

81 episodes

Artwork
iconShare
 
Manage episode 422333250 series 3446450
Content provided by Do The Work. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Do The Work or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.
Sabrina sits down with Matthias Barker for a second time to dive into the detrimental effects of people-pleasing, a common trauma response where individuals regulate others to feel safe themselves. Unlike genuine empathy, people-pleasing stems from fear and often involves manipulation. Barker emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and confronting dysfunction rather than avoiding it, as true safety doesn't come from constant monitoring out of fear. He advises distinguishing between needs and anxiety, advocating for acceptance and mutual attunement in relationships. Personal experiences shared by both Sabrina and Barker highlight the necessity of building a solid relationship foundation, addressing big emotions, and helping partners express their needs authentically without resorting to people-pleasing behaviors.
Snag Sabrina's 8 week course HERE!
Get Ad free and 2 Bonus episodes a month HERE!
Want to work with Sabrina? HERE!
Don't forget to follow Sabrina and Do the Work on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE!
Please support our sponsors!
Go 20% off your first order and free shipping with Chomps HERE!
Save $10 on your first purchase at StoryWorth HERE!
Get 10% off your first month of Betterhelp HERE!
  continue reading

81 episodes

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