The Brits or The Brats?

Don Woods

The Brits went off OK but I got a bit bored halfway through…it’s a sad situation but the music game is slowly going under….technology is seeing to that. I was listening to Andrew Lloyd Webber being interviewed on Radio 2 and he was saying that he once wrote a song for ELVIS and thought he had reached the summit of his career…however he never made a penny!!...as Elvis puts his name in the writers column and Colonel Parker takes over the publishing…so nothing really changes. I remember Elvis asking Dolly Parton if he could record “I will always love you” (with presumably the same set up as Lloyd Webber) and she chased him….nice one Dolly. Now the record companies are blubbering because they are not making money…boo hoo…they have been ripping everyone off for years. I have made a lot of money from music …none of which has come from any publishing or record deal (of which I had several)…I did it myself. Gove is at it again going on about how history should be taught (like HE would know)….saying that pupils should learn dates…..now the reason I didn’t like history in school was DATES…too many of them….these days I find the subject very interesting because I study the facts and don’t have to remember DATES…wake up Govey….he has also been going on again about “no winners and no losers” in primary schools…a subject we have covered in the past. There was a tragedy locally last week…a poor old lady had put a microwaveable hot water bottle in the microwave to heat up and left it in too long…these thing are filled with grain and heat from the middle…she then put it in her bed…took a sleeping pill…and fell asleep…the hot water bottle went on fire and burnt the house down…the poor old lady lost her life.......this sort of thing should never happen. We are doing O.K. in the Winter Olympics…but I wonder what percentage of us care?....the only people who seem to get excited with the curling are the competitors and the commentators….It has blanket coverage each day on the BBC….and I wonder how much THAT is costing….when a half hour highlights programme would do it at night…again nice to know where our licence fee goes. Perhaps they could put some of the money towards the homeless and "hard done by"... finally….Joan Collins made a guest appearance in “Benidorm”…WHY?...she must be hard up…….They had the guy who plays the barman on one morning and he said that “stars” are queuing up to get on the show…..I have come to the conclusion that it’s ME……I must have lost my sense of humour somewhere along the way…..I watched “Birds of a Feather”….women yelling at each other….terrible unfunny tripe….Mrs Brown’s Boys getting awards?….I give up….