Ep. 13 - Reclaiming My Feminine Self

Finding Forgiveness; a Family Fairy Tale

For 25 years, my marriage demanded a strong, capable presence. I was the provider, the organizer, the one who shouldered responsibility. This strength, this "masculine energy," permeated everything – my choices, style, and even my haircut. I wasn't aware of it, but masculinity became my identity. Then came the divorce. My new partner surprised me with a gentle smile by saying “let me be the man.” It was a wake-up call. Join me as I explore how I rediscovered my feminine side – a quality that can be surprisingly easy to lose sight of. My story is of strength, self-discovery, and reclaiming the grace that makes me, well, me.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [0:34] Susan suggests that we don’t truly see ourselves as we are, and she shares details of her life before marriage

• [4:25] Susan says her marriage is what precipitated her break with the feminine, but she ignored the warnings she heard from others

• [8:06] Susan’s partner brought her to realize that she had given up her femininity

• [13:00] Susan’s mother had masculine traits, and Susan was able to identify those

• [15:55] Susan invites listeners to share their stories of an embodiment of masculine energy. Susan tells why she changed the way she dresses and her style as she continues her journey of finding the feminine

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• When a woman takes on all the responsibilities of a marriage and a household, and the husband sits back and does nothing, you lose your femininity.

• It is easier to see other people's masculine and feminine sides than it is to see our own.

• If you point out any traits to a friend or loved one, ensure it is done with kindness, love and support.

QUOTES:

“This masculine energy was so deep inside of me that when I left my husband after 25 years and started a new relationship, my life partner told me, ‘Let me be the man.’ Wow. That hit me like a ton of bricks.” Susan Gibson

“There is a masculine and feminine inside of me. Everybody has both, and having an observer who can hold that mirror up to you and say in a non-judgmental way, in a very loving, caring, nurturing way, has allowed me to see myself and build that self-awareness.” Susan Gibson

RESOURCES:

Susan Gibson - Email

ABOUT THE HOST:

Susan Gibson grew up in a small town in Northern Maine, the only surviving child of parents who married young and divorced young. From the influence of their shared experiences, Susan has learned two things that are core to who she is: the value of community and the power of having a voice.

Susan has spent her entire academic and professional career as a woman in tech, starting her career as a developer in the mid-80s to today, where she is CEO of Temenos+Agility, a management consulting company she co-founded with her partner, Siraj Sirajuddin, where they help enterprises transform organizationally and personally, to find a more meaningful way to deliver value to their customers.

Susan is a frequent contributor to the Women in Tech (WiT) Regatta and speaks at public and private events worldwide, using her voice to grow communities of women, mentors and allies in tech.

Susan has many lifelong pursuits - healthy eating, fitness, yoga & meditation, music, theater, opera, reading, movies, travel, family and friends. She is also rebuilding her family’s 110-year-old homestead in Northern Maine, a true labor of love.