Episode 76: On The Replay

I Can't Fux With You! Confessions of An Uppity Black Woman

We are revisiting an earlier episode, and it is apropos. The dusty a** sons are partcluarly mite covered these days. From the ninja whom I deny knowing to America's "leaders" (I see you Byron Donalds) - the paupers in too large King's clothing continue to beat their chests while leaving a trail of unacknowledged disaster in the background. Mamas I come back to you, please, for the love of all things holy, Get.Your.Dusty.Ass.Sons!
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The sh*t we not fuxing with today is dusty a** sons! Mothers, please retrieve them, so they are not sent out into the world to terrorize Uppity Black Women. Today we examine a recent viral internet story that would be a full on comedic special if it was not colored with a possibly premeditated burglary, gaslighting, misogynoir, and a dusty a** son. Today we go deep into the story of fellow Uppity Black Woman, Ms. Alexis Douge, of "tabi swiper" fame. Ms. Douge was unfortunately victim to a theft of incredibly expensive shoes. The theft was perpetrated by a dusty a** son she met on Tinder. After engaging in a consensual sexual relationship with this dusty a** son, the dusty a** son proceeded to steal Ms. Douge's very expensive shoes. When questioned about the theft, the dusty a** son then proceeded to gaslight Ms. Douge, stating that he did not steal the shoes, and only admitted to the theft after Ms. Douge put out an APB on the internets and was able to secure a photo of the dusty a** son's girlfriend wearing the stolen footwear. Nonsense all around.
While on the surface this whole scenario is tinged with humor, the underlying issues presented here are quite disturbing, and frankly, we should all be frightened. Today we will discuss the vitriol directed towards Ms. Douge, although she was the one violated. This vitriol is based in themes of misogynoir as Ms. Douge's choice to have casual sex, as an Uppity Black Woman, flies in the face of the required policing of the Black Woman's body and sexuality, thus any harm that befell Ms. Douge post this sexual encounter was indeed "deserved" by her. Additionally, we examine the delivery of the shoes to the girlfriend of the dusty a** son. While none of us are privy to the conversation regarding the delivery of the used shoes, what does it say about our acceptance of the minimum in relationship. Are we b*tches that are good with used shoes from our partners? If we accept used shoes, why the fux would anyone get us new ones?! Most importantly we discuss how do dusty a** sons become dusty a** sons! Mothers, you know your son is dusty around 10 years old. As parents, we are responsible for ensuring that we provide our children with the tools they need to be functional members of society. If your kid is dusty, do get them the help they need so they do not end up terrorizing society in general and my daughter specifically.
REFERENCES IN TODAYS EPISODE
You can enter Ms. Alexis Douge of "tabi swiper" fame into the google machine. Essence provides a great overview and additional links to her viral video with images of the dusty a** son.
Trey Anthony,

If you are an Uppity Black Woman, ready to say: I.Can't.Fux.With.You! Visit us at omuwaluxe.com to learn more about The Black Woman Liberation Formula. Sis, it is time to unpretzel and get yourself liberated.
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