78 - Hearing Both Sides

Life Lessons with Dr. Steve Schell

When I only hear one side of an argument I usually find myself agreeing with the person who’s talking to me. They seem totally sincere and lay out their case carefully and I have no reason to doubt that they’re telling me the truth, so I tend to accept their conclusions, which, if they happen to be upset with another person or group of people, leaves me feeling the same way. I pick up their offense and make it my own. This kind of transfer happens all the time, and all of us are vulnerable to being drawn in. No one is trying to be unfair, but the verdict seems so clear. What other conclusion can we reach? That is, until the other person gets to present their side. Then, almost always, we find we’re hearing new information that the first person didn’t give us, but which changes the picture rather dramatically. What at first appeared so obvious, now looks more complicated, or in some cases, radically different. Solomon warned us about this. He said, “The first to plead his case seems right, until another comes and examines him” (Pr 18:17). He’s warning us that it’s always wise to hear both sides of an argument before making a judgment. And I think all of us would agree. Of course we should. It’s only fair. But in practice we often don’t, because it’s awkward to tell someone we aren’t ready to join them in their judgment against another person and it takes courage to tell someone else what’s been said about them. People might get angry, and we don’t want to create an even bigger problem. So we quietly remind ourselves there’s probably another side to this story… but we remain silent, or maybe we choose the easier path, which is to ignore justice and embrace our friend’s anger.
What we’re watching take place in this courtroom in Caesarea is Roman law at work. Their law insisted that a citizen had a right to answer accusers. No one could go to a judge and get a decision based on only their side of the story. If they accused someone of something, that person had the right to hear those charges, from them, and then to defend themselves. Only after hearing both sides would a judge or jury make a decision.
We could read through this section of Acts and easily miss this basic, but profound, truth: a person has a right to answer their accusers. It was sad to watch how unjustly Paul was treated in Israel’s religious court. That “judge” ordered him to be struck in the mouth after he made his first statement (Ac 23:2). But he was a disgracefully corrupt man who didn’t care about truth. By contrast, Felix, the Roman governor, let Paul speak without interruption, and in doing so was simply practicing justice. The lesson for us today is to do the same, and to remember that justice isn’t reserved for courts of law. It should be at work every time we hear a bad report about someone else. We too should withhold judgment until we hear the other side.