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Understanding Loneliness, Relational Needs, and Different Views of a Neurodiverse Marriage with Enoch

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Manage episode 394312701 series 3391990
Content provided by Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.
If you are interested in attending the mixed neurotype support group I co-facilitate with Jodi Carlton, the cost is only $25 per session. We meet monthly on the first Wednesday of the month and we offer 2 groups. One meets at 12:30pm EST and the other at 6:30pm EST. You can ⁠click here⁠ to register for the upcoming group. Thank you for being part of the Neurodiverse Love community! ________________________________________________________ During this episode, Enoch shares the way he describes the experiences he had and the feelings and emotions he experienced in his 21 year neurodiverse marriage. He shares the word pictures he has created to help others understand some of the ways he felt before his marriage ended in divorce. The word pictures described are: 1) The Onion of Loneliness-there are 3 dimensions/layers to this word picture. They include the loneliness with your partner because you have very different needs; the loneliness when friends and family don't believe you or understand what you are experiencing; and the loneliness when you feel hopeless that things can't or won't ever change. 2) Cup-vs-Barrel/Pond-vs-Stream-each partner has differing needs and different thresholds for feeling satiated in regards to the quality and quantity of connection. Each partner also has different ways in which time is navigated. 3) Wedding Day as a Finish Line-vs-Starting Line. One partner may feel that the wedding day was the end goal and the other may feel it was the beginning of a new adventure with lots of opportunities for connection ahead. In addition, one partner may seek stability and routine in the marriage, while the other is looking to grow and have lots of new experiences together. 4) The Egg of Marriage addresses masking and how others may see a very different version of the neurodivergent partner, as they only see the shell of the egg, not what is inside. In addition, each partner may have very different executive function skills and this may impact the appearance of the egg yolk which can't be seen by people outside the relationship. You can contact Enoch at ifgodwhy@gmail.com or check out his blog and resources at: www.ifgodwhy.com/ND In addition, for a less glitchy version of this episode you can visit: https://www.icloud.com/iclouddrive/0cb5GjFCrOJqfd1-7DT-4VPWw#ND_exp_-_word_pictures_1_podcast_with_Mona_Kay_20240105t --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/neurodiverse-love/message
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172 episodes

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Manage episode 394312701 series 3391990
Content provided by Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.
If you are interested in attending the mixed neurotype support group I co-facilitate with Jodi Carlton, the cost is only $25 per session. We meet monthly on the first Wednesday of the month and we offer 2 groups. One meets at 12:30pm EST and the other at 6:30pm EST. You can ⁠click here⁠ to register for the upcoming group. Thank you for being part of the Neurodiverse Love community! ________________________________________________________ During this episode, Enoch shares the way he describes the experiences he had and the feelings and emotions he experienced in his 21 year neurodiverse marriage. He shares the word pictures he has created to help others understand some of the ways he felt before his marriage ended in divorce. The word pictures described are: 1) The Onion of Loneliness-there are 3 dimensions/layers to this word picture. They include the loneliness with your partner because you have very different needs; the loneliness when friends and family don't believe you or understand what you are experiencing; and the loneliness when you feel hopeless that things can't or won't ever change. 2) Cup-vs-Barrel/Pond-vs-Stream-each partner has differing needs and different thresholds for feeling satiated in regards to the quality and quantity of connection. Each partner also has different ways in which time is navigated. 3) Wedding Day as a Finish Line-vs-Starting Line. One partner may feel that the wedding day was the end goal and the other may feel it was the beginning of a new adventure with lots of opportunities for connection ahead. In addition, one partner may seek stability and routine in the marriage, while the other is looking to grow and have lots of new experiences together. 4) The Egg of Marriage addresses masking and how others may see a very different version of the neurodivergent partner, as they only see the shell of the egg, not what is inside. In addition, each partner may have very different executive function skills and this may impact the appearance of the egg yolk which can't be seen by people outside the relationship. You can contact Enoch at ifgodwhy@gmail.com or check out his blog and resources at: www.ifgodwhy.com/ND In addition, for a less glitchy version of this episode you can visit: https://www.icloud.com/iclouddrive/0cb5GjFCrOJqfd1-7DT-4VPWw#ND_exp_-_word_pictures_1_podcast_with_Mona_Kay_20240105t --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/neurodiverse-love/message
  continue reading

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