My maternity experience - interview with Joanna Kalmer

Off balance

“The most important statistics I want everybody to know is that less than 1/3 of first-time mothers return to full-time employment, and less than 1/5 will leave their jobs completely by the 5th year. I've learnt to respect statistics if something is repeated with such a strong pattern – there is something magical about it – and, as I am in my 5th year, I understand this magic myself.”

In this episode, my dear friend Joanna Kalmer, investment adviser and an entrepreneur specialising in digital finance, took on the role of reporter and asked me the hard questions about maternity and motherhood.

We are talking about patterns and statistics, and don’t forget the sleepless nights either! The mental and physical exhaustion of motherhood is real, do not underestimate it.

As an economist, anytime I have had to write a report about motherhood, I felt sort of “punished”, as the topic wasn’t exactly the one I was the most interested in; however, my world turned upside down when my little creature arrived. You know those books about sleep training? Forget about them, not only about the books, but also about sleep overall.

There is one thing that raises both my temper and my heartbeat: when you get pregnant, you are happy, but your life continues, as it should – the “only” addition is a little heart beating under yours – but people see things differently. As soon as they find out about your blessing, they put you in a box, write “fragile” on it, and treat you like the most expensive Michelangelo statue. This box also has a warning message: only talk to her about pregnancy and kids. Like your own existence is boxed away in storage, and the only things you should talk about are kids, nappies and baby carriage brands.

However, we women are much more, before, during and after pregnancy, even if our hair is in a messy bun and we don’t look like we walked out of a fashion magazine, while our little sleepless monster is hanging onto us; however, we are still interested in the wider world, which might not involve stories for two-year-olds.

When I was talking about this with Joanna, one key point came up: organisation. How do you organise your life after a baby?

I will tell you the tactics that saved me from going “crazy”, but what did you do to save yourself? Let me know in the comments section, and stayed tuned.

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