Episode #158: "I Have SOMETHING To Say" with special guest, Pam Isom

I have SOMETHING to say!

Ladies. We are riddled with guilt. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Good news: you can stop beating yourself up.

In this episode of I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY, I'm joined by my new friend Pam Isom, President and CEO of ICE Safety Solutions, a company that has been supporting Corporations and Government entities since 1999 with the mitigation and prevention of employees and contractors from getting injured, ill, or potentially losing their life.

The stakes have always been high for Pam, who has had to navigate asserting her industry expertise in a male-dominated field. And she’s succeeded because of her unmatched ability to customize any potential safety concern into simulation-based training to ensure long-term retention of skills, and most importantly, people’s capacity to save lives.

However, today Pam and I talk woman-to-woman, sister-to-sister, about the guilt that inevitably creeps in when you are running a business and raising kids at the same time. Pam had her first baby while she was starting her business 25 years ago. Like in her home, in mine, my kids only know me as a mom-entrepreneur as well. And while it may sound sexy, it poses certain challenges: hard to disconnect from work/clients, limited family time even though you’re sort of “there” all the time, the constant disappointment of your loved ones, assumptions about where you have your priorities, etc. Some of these apply to working women in general, but having worked in both the corporate sector and as an entrepreneur – well, let’s just say the hustle is different. As a small business owner, you’re solely responsible for securing the revenue that will deliver financial stability and socioeconomic mobility for the family.

I ask Pam, whose daughters are now in their early 20s and pursuing successful careers if my kids (16 and 13) will be OK, even though I often feel I’m failing them by not being fully accessible every time they need me. She responds reassuringly – “YES, THEY WILL BE OK!” She offers up the following gems that help me rid myself of my guilt:

1. The children of mom entrepreneurs are exposed to experiences they otherwise wouldn’t have like listening in on business negotiations, helping consolidate invoices, and attending networking events. This helps them handle rejection, learn how to persevere and compromise, and adjust to unexpected circumstances (and people) more swiftly.
2. They understand that “NO”, stands for New Opportunity. It’s not the end of the world if things don’t work out as planned. On the contrary, they know it may lead to a better opportunity and the result is resilient, nimble, and creative people.
3. They learn to deal with disappointment, and that it’s OK to disappoint someone every day because no one is perfect. This wards off a sense of entitlement, affording everyone in the household a chance to “come short” of meeting the expectations of others without judgment.