That time when I was afraid of my husband ... and how I handled it

The Liz Cast

I was married for about three years, and almost all of that time was dominated by fear of the man I'd married. In this episode, I tell that story, start to finish. It's one of the experiences that defines how I see myself today.

Spousal abuse takes many forms. While my ex-husband never hit me, I lived in a state of constant fear that he would throw something at me that landed, or that he would act on his impulses to hurt me. I still believe that if I'd stayed in that relationship much longer, he would have hurt me.

Telling this story is one of the most vulnerable things I've ever done, but it feels like a moment of reclaiming my agency in my life. I am not ashamed of this story ... although I certainly was ashamed by what was happening behind closed doors at the time.

Telling these stories empowers other women, those who might have experienced something like this or who might be living with someone who treats them poorly, to tell their stories and come out of the shadows.

If you need resources, please reach out to the National Domestic Violence hotline. You can chat with them online https://www.thehotline.org/ or call 1-800-799-7233 (for TTY, 1-800-787-3224).