Parenting as a Survivor

The Top Knot Squad

On this episode of the Top Knot Squad, we will be talking about what it’s like to parent as a trauma survivor and how we can discuss right from wrong touch with our kids. According to the National Center for Victims of Crimes , 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys have been sexually abused before 18th birthday. There are 42 million survivors of child sexual abuse in America. 3 million are children, which would fill 46 national football stadiums. 90% of children are sexually abused by someone they know and trust. There are over 747,000 registered sex offenders in America.

Today, we don’t just want to talk about how to eliminate this crisis, but also discuss what happens when a survivor gives birth and faces their own parenting journey. For many survivors of childhood abuse, symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) may re-occur, or never arise, until they become a parent. All of us have struggled with mom guilt at some point or another, but parenting survivors are at an increased risk for internalizing shame and can find themselves feeling triggered while navigating the trenches of parenthood. Today we are thrilled to have our friend and colleague, Lindsay Thomason joining us for this conversation.

Lindsay is a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and the owner and founder of The Nanny League, Inc., an elite placement agency that matches affluent families with college-educated nannies. She started the agency in 2010 after pursuing a career in television & film that ultimately led her to taking on a live-in nanny role for a high-profile family in Los Angeles. Lindsay and her team of women behind the brand have successfully built a database of thousands of professional, college-educated nannies, baby nurses and personal assistants, and have matched them with families across the United States. The Nanny League has been featured in PEOPLE Magazine, New York Magazine, US Weekly, My Fox LA, Celebrity Baby Scoop and Lindsay appeared on Austin’s Studio 512 last winter. In 2017, Lindsay was nominated for LA Business Journal 's 2017 Women's Summit CEO of the Year. She proudly serves on the board as an Associate for Stop the Silence: Stop Child Sexual Abuse, Inc.®, and has most recently helped develop an online training program to educate nannies about child sexual abuse prevention and mitigation. The Nanny League is the first-ever nanny agency to mandate this training for its members. Lindsay currently resides is Austin, TX with her husband Eric, their six-month-old twins, Bette & Sarge, and chi-terrorist (Chihuahua Terrier) dog Evvie. She is extremely passionate about educating people on childhood sexual abuse and is dedicated to maintaining The Nanny League's reputation as one of the best nanny matchmaker agencies in the US.

Resources:

Bessel A. van der Kolk, “The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma"

Ellen Bass & Laura Davis, "The Courage to Heal"

The Courage to Heal Workbook

Erin Merryn

The Swimsuit Lesson

The Right Touch