The Anxiety and Non-Monogamy Episode

They Talk Sex

We take another dive into discussing common barriers to communication and relationship security with writer Lola Phoenix, who has been navigating this for theirself and others online and IRL for years.

2:00 a lot of common questions

5:00 power dynamics

8:00 on being protective of the community

10:00 what are your biggest challenges with non-monogamy?

14:00 disagreement doesn’t have to be scary

17:00 forgive yourself for being afraid of abandonment

22:00 attention helps us to survive

25:00 I will grow my own life regardless of you

27:00 what is an anchor? A personal reason for doing

32:00 is being primary the most fun?

36:00 we are primed for monogamy

39:00 personal preference is not the rule

42:00 jealousy regarding sleepovers/sex

46:00 i don’t need to hear the details for you to have fun

50:00 red flags vs irrational

53:00 women have to look for threats regularly

56:00 book suggestions

59:00 object impermanance

1:03:00 how to ask for partner support

1:08:00 on hiring a sex worker

36:00 people are encouraged to be monogamous

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