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Don’t put the kids first.
Manage episode 433676272 series 3592532
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A lot of single parents genuinely don’t realize that they’re doing their kids (and their romantic partners!) a disservice by putting the kids first no matter what. Yes, kids have needs, and obviously it’s a parent’s job to make sure those needs are met.
However, your relationship has needs too. And pretending like only the kids’ needs matter is not sustainable. Just like it’d also be unsustainable to neglect your kids by spending all your time and energy on a romantic partner. Finding a balance between those commitments is key. If you feel like you’re in competition with your stepkids for your partner’s attention, that’s a sign your needs aren’t getting met.
One of the few things a stepfamily has in common with a traditional family is that the couple-relationship forms the foundation. Bending over backwards for the sake of the kids does not set your stepfamily up for success. This is so important to understand that I have a whole blog post on it: WHY YOUR RELATIONSHIP (NOT THE KIDS) SHOULD COME FIRST IN A STEPFAMILY
Hopefully you can get your partner to read it too. xo
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