2: Literacy Part 1 - Mindset

Every Child Matters By Haryani Bakri

TRANSCRIPT FOR EP2:
Literacy Part 1 ( Mindset)

In my first part of the many series to come on literacy, I will be sharing with you on mindset and the common mistakes that we as parents make. This sharing is based on my past and current experience as a mom to 3 teenage boys as well as a literacy facilitator.

First we have to ask ourselves, as parents do we have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset?

If my child has no interest in reading or writing, do we start to label our child as lazy or even slow learner?

Let me share with you this story and it's a true story.

There was a p3 child in one of our programmes, who was very quiet and will usually sit by himself – so you could imagine how "participative", he was and yes, you’re right with very low self-esteem too. Language itself was a challenge for him at that time. He always had this mindset of “I do not know” and “I cannot”.

When the child finally warmed up to us, he opened up. We found out that, the reason behind why he was acting the way he was acting all the while was because, he was always being labelled as ‘stupid’ by his dad. Every little action he made, he felt was never right. Always been put down.

We had to create a separate and customised lesson to enable him catch up with the rest. Eventually, through the activities that we engaged him with, and of course with the encouragement and motivation, it allowed him to build his self-confidence once he tasted his first success.

So parents, have we asked ourselves, what is our belief system that we are creating for our children?

The onus is on us parents, to set our belief system and realise that every child can learn and each child has his or her own unique learning potential with the right tools and techniques to support the child.

In my consultation with parents especially for first time parents, many have asked these questions “ How early do I read with my child” or “Is it too early to read with my child” or some even begin to panic, “Is it too late to read with my child”

It is never too early to read with the child. The best time to programme a child’s brain is during the child’s first seven years of their life. Studies have also shown that when both mom and dad read to the child even when the child is still in the mother’s womb, it helps to stimulate the brain’s development. So new parents to be, it is just about time.

If we think that it is probably too late, then what is stopping us? let’s start to take action now! Early intervention could help identify the gap in the child’s learning if any for example Dyslexia. The child’s self-esteem and confidence could also be developed early.

Learning begins from home and parents, we are our child’s first teachers.

As parents, we need to create a nurturing environment for the child of “ I love you, I am with you and it is worthwhile to react” , this creates an opportunity for the child to learn from mistakes.

In my day to day interaction with children from pre-school to primary school, I have made my own observation and study. Children who have strong support from parents at home especially having both mom and dad together even though these children have zero knowledge when they first enrolled in our programmes, they make better and faster progress. This group of children is more willing to learn and always wanting more as compared to the other group of children whose parents just leave the child in its entirety to teachers and facilitators.

The first common mistake that parents usually make is leaving everything to the teachers and facilitators. Some of us, when we're too tired from work and for convenient sake, we easily give our gadgets (handphones and tablets) to the children when the child wants attention or when they are throwing tantrums instead of guiding them through their learning. As one of the facilitators myself, I have always encouraged these parents to be involved in their child’s learning through our extension activities from home and to ensure that parents too are equipped with the necessary tools to support their child’s learning.

Let me share with you another story and it's a true story.

I've a pair of twins who are 5 years in my class. When I first assess them, they are still grappling with reading. When they are given new words, they simply kept quiet and didn't even want to try sounding out the letters and blend eg. little. Now, they are midway to complete their first module and I'm very happy to see the progress that they've made. Why? The lessons that these twins go through with me are followed up at home. Their parents took my advice by reading with them every night and before the start of each lesson, they shared with me the contents of the book so that as the twins read, I could refer to what they are reading. It's really rewarding to see that even with the difficult words, they're trying to blend and I could see the effort put in by the twins and the parents. So, now they are in their 9th out of the 12th sessions, it has become a routine, before the start of every lesson, they will read to me the books.

Another common mistake, that we usually make as parents, we are stingy in our praise for our own children and sometimes we are guilty for offering innuendos instead. So, are we giving the right signal to our children with the so called tough love treatment? Children too need to be motivated.

So, how do we praise our children? Do we praise process or do we praise person? What is the difference between the two? Praise process is when you praise the action for what your child does. For example, when you see the effort that your child puts in his or her reading , you praise his or her effort “Good effort ! I love your reading with that beautiful intonation.!” and not just by saying “Good job, or very good.” The child needs to know what he or she is being praised for.

The final most common mistake we make is that we are often too busy ourselves so much so that we hardly have the time set aside for our children especially in reading with them. Not only with young children but with older children too and yes even when they are teenagers. At least 10-15minutes is all that matter. You will need a dedicated time to set the momentum for the children and a designated place so that the child know yeay it's reading time or yeay it's story time!

Conclusion:

So parents, be the parents that your child needs. Provide them the unconditional love, the continuous support and the nurturing environment. It is not just the parent nor the teacher but it takes a village to raise a child, for each child, matters!

Call to action:

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I look forward to seeing you in my next episode where I will be sharing with you more tips and ways to engage your child in reading and realise their learning potential.