27. Rachel Tomlinson - a progressive head teacher

Wild Card - Whose Shoes?

In the words of Yvonne Newbold MBE: “Whatever you're doing, please stop and find 35 mins to listen to this fabulous conversation between 2 of my favourite people. Listening to Rachel talk about the simplicity of kindness and empathy in transforming schools to welcome, include and make every child feel safe blew me away”
(Learn more about Yvonne’s fantastic work at Newbold Hope in Episode 13)

I always hoped this podcast would be about bringing in new people in order to bring in fresh ideas and perspectives.

Rachel Tomlinson is the head teacher of Barrowford school in Lancashire. I connected with her when she was a speaker at Newbold Hope conference. Like Yvonne, I was blown away by the simplicity and humanity of Rachel‘s message.

Lemon lightbulbs 🍋💡🍋

• Learn to love. Love to learn!
• Inclusivity. Look through the lens of the child. including the Infant voice
• Find out what matters to people #WMTY
• If we tap into our shared humanity and connection, the systems and protocols fit around that; simple solutions follow
• Healthcare professionals have lived experience too. Don’t put people in boxes
• Not even healthcare professionals find it easy to navigate healthcare pathways!
• “On the other side of the fence”, it feels so different. And why is there a fence? 😢
• Some children find school very difficult. Work WITH them and make sure everyone has the best experience
• A school with no punishments and no rewards - unusual!
• Restorative approach - for children and adults alike. Learn from our mistakes
• Go back and unpick what went wrong, to avoid similar outcomes in the future
• Focus on restoring the relationship
• Make the school feel safe enough for children to be honest and talk about problems
• Don’t let the small stuff escalate
• Take the power imbalance away
• Learn from lived experience – children and parents
• Telling personal stories can be very painful - how can we get more people listening?
• Let’s learn (as medics do) from serious incidents; prevent permanent exclusions from school
• Move away from the blame / shame culture. It breaks trust.
• Shaming parents and children has dire and lasting consequences
• Believe parents when they report problems and seek help
• Children (people!) behave differently in different situations – find out why rather than be smug!
• Don’t expect parents to apologise for their child
• If we contain the child in school in such a way that they erupt at home, we have work to do!
• Feelings of inadequacy run deep. Don’t judge
• Life is fragile - we are all one step away from being ‘on the other side of the fence’
• Empathy increases when you become a parent yourself
• Is what we provide good enough for our own children?
• Children are just learning ‘how to be’. Help them get it right, just as you would do with long multiplication
• Advocate for children – particularly those with less resilience
• Different ‘sectors’ must work together for the benefit of the child – leave the ego at the door.
• No ‘cookie cutter’ children! Every child comes with a different experience, different circumstances, including young carers.
• A culture of openness in the school means that teachers listen and understand
• Be human. Be kind. It is that simple!

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Please recommend 'Wild Card - Whose Shoes' to others who enjoy hearing passionate people talk about their experiences of improving health care.

Chapters

1. 27. Rachel Tomlinson - a progressive head teacher (00:00:00)

2. Newbold Hope conference - making a difference to children and families (00:01:12)

3. Learn to love. Love to learn. what a great mantra! (00:02:15)

4. Inclusivity. Looking through the lens of the child (00:03:29)

5. Synergy with Whose Shoes! (00:04:00)

6. Infant voice - Approachable Parenting (00:04:10)

7. Roots of empathy – New Zealand (00:04:51)

8. Dr Bob Klaber – kindness Sessions (00:06:12)

9. Nicki Macklin – Needles and Noodles (00:06:30)

10. Miles Sibley – Patient Experience Library (00:06:45)

11. Humanity. Looking beyond labels. #WMTY (00:07:46)

12. If we tap into our shared humanity, the systems and protocols will follow (00:08:30)

13. When we have a connection, simple solutions follow (00:09:34)

14. Healthcare professionals … have lived experience too. Don’t put people in boxes (00:10:00)

15. Not even healthcare professionals find it easy to navigate health care pathways! (00:10:35)

16. “On the other side of the fence” … it feels so different. And why is there a fence? (00:11:00)

17. Our shared goal – to make sure everyone in our care has the best experience (00:11:40)

18. Tensions. Some children do find school very difficult. (00:11:48)

19. A school with no punishments and no rewards - unusual! (00:12:12)

20. Restorative approach - for children and adults alike. Learning from our mistakes (00:13:21)

21. Something has gone wrong – but where did it start? Look beyond the obvious (00:14:30)

22. Focus on restoring the relationship (00:14:58)

23. Escalation. Let’s avoid it! (00:15:29)

24. Making the school feel safe enough for children to be honest and talk about the problem (00:16:13)

25. Taking the power imbalance away (00:16:30)

26. Don’t let the small stuff escalate (00:16:55)

27. Learning from lived experience – and specifically … the perspective of the child (00:17:18)

28. Telling personal stories can be very painful - how can we get more people listening? (00:17:40)

29. And in education – listen to the voice of the children, which should be loud! (00:18:24)

30. Shaming parents - and children - has dire and lasting consequences (00:18:39)

31. Much to learn from the medical model of learning from serious incidents to prevent permanent exclusions from school (00:19:55)

32. Going back and unpicking what went wrong, to avoid similar outcomes in the future (00:21:00)

33. Moving away from the blame / shame culture (00:21:25)

34. Imperative to believe parents when they report problems and seek help (00:21:45)

35. Different behaviour in different situations – find out why rather than being smug! (00:22:48)

36. No parent wants to apologise for their child, their very existence (00:23:21)

37. The ramifications of blaming parents and breaking trust (00:24:10)

38. If we contain the child in school in such a way that they erupt at home, we have work to do! (00:24:47)

39. Parenthood and those feelings of inadequacy … run deep. Being judged!! (00:26:01)

40. Empathy – does it increase when you become a parent yourself? (00:26:53)

41. The key test - is what we provide good enough for our own children? (00:27:40)

42. Advocating for children – particularly those with less resilience (00:28:24)

43. Walk in my shoes (00:29:10)

44. Life is fragile - we are all one step away from being ‘on the other side of the fence’ (00:29:25)

45. So, should we clone Rachel? (00:29:37)

46. The depth and diversity of the Newbold Hope conference (00:29:53)

47. Different ‘sectors’ working together for the benefit of the child – leaving their ego at the door. Coproduction (00:30:07)

48. What about young carers? (00:31:32)

49. Every child comes with a different experience, different circumstances. No ‘cookie cutter’ children! (00:32:02)

50. A culture of openness in the school means that teachers listen and understand (00:32:40)

51. Be human. Be kind. It is that simple! (00:33:18)

52. Believe that people have good intentions, that they want to do a good job (00:33:40)

53. The Grace model assumes the other person is OK … rather than expecting difficulty and conflict (00:33:50)