As we discuss this episode, there are really only about a dozen possible conversation topics, once you really get to think about it. Once you've exhausted the possibilities of bees, vehicles, bees in vehicles... well, it's time to finally finish what we started way back in our first ever episode, and lay to rest once and for all the contentious mat…

Ever since that first time an audience got freaked out by a train, we've been fascinated by the ol' moving pictures. But have we done all we can with this inspiring medium? As ever, the answer is a resounding no. Sure, we could keep just re-releasing superhero sequels and live-action remakes of animated classics, but the modern audience demands so …

If music be the food of love, then it's time to put love on a diet. Honestly, this stuff'll clog your arteries. We've heard your chart pops, your synth beats and your hard rocks, and honestly none of them are quite cutting the mustard. As is reliably the case, the status quo needs shaking up, and we've got the ol' Disrupt-o-matic all revved up and …

Plastic pals that come alive. Every kid's dream, right? Sneaking around your bedroom at night, getting into mischief. What could possibly go wrong. Join us as we take a deep dive into what the world might actually look like if a) the Toy Story films were 100% true and b) the cat was out of the bag (or toy was out of the box, or whatever). If you ha…

You may not like it, but this is what peak human performance looks like. Squat, scaly forms heaving their metallic bulk over the scorched landscape. Gradually slowing, slowing, slowing down as the precious heat leaves their blood. As they grind to a stately halt, a majestic crest extends! Up, up it reaches, a salute to the heavens, a mute appeal to…

According to The Matrix, they had to trap everyone in a simulation that mirrored real life - as opposed to a perfect digital utopia - because when they tried the latter for Matrix 1.0, the collective minds of humanity rejected it. That does seem like an appropriate punchline to the cosmic joke that is consciousness, and if you look around at the si…

There are two types of people: 1) those who will one day be zombies, and 2) those who will one day be their food. Pretty sure we read that on an inspirational bumper sticker or something. Then I guess you've got the oh-so-badass survivors (let's call them 3), many of whom end up as number 2) by the end of the movie anyway, so the few who don't are …

Don't get us wrong, we love dogs. And horses, horses are great. Actually, since they basically occupy the middle of that Venn diagram, it's possible we love greyhounds most of all. But that's not the point - the point is, what if humans hadn't been able to base their early civilisation around the domestication of such familiar species, and had to b…

Heaven forbid we ever engage in anything approaching continuity on this programme, but looking at this and last episode it's possible to start noticing a theme. And it's 'misinformation', which is probably bang on the mark for our brand! This time, rather than confirming conspiracy theories for fun and profit, we set about justifying that other mai…

We all know you have to check your facts in this age of misinformation. You've gotta do your due diligence, be appropriately sceptical. You don't just lap up the fake news that the mainstream media is trying to feed you. No no, you open a new tab, run a quick search, open up to two (2) of the results from the first page, skim the headline and scrol…

What would happen if the mechanical contrivances upon which we rely ever more heavily were to betray us - their hapless, trusting creators - with no warning or mercy, and indulge in a twisted mockery of their intended purpose? What if, in fact, all machines did the exact opposite of what they were built for, 1% of the time? Picture a world where th…

How do we save the High Street? On occasion, gentle listeners, even the highly trained hogwashers at Hyper Theticals Inc. cannot avoid being a little topical. We stand, ever vigilant, as your stalwart defenders against the vile incursions of "current events" and "useful information". We think you will agree there is far, far too much of that around…

What if growing larger wasn't a tradition your bones gave up on in your twenties? Bellies and ears and stuff keep it going, sure, but we can probably all agree it isn't the same. Well, what if we told you you could just keep getting taller, your whole life? Well guess what! With our revolutionary new Hyper Theticals Gene Tonic (TM) , y- wait. No. T…

Pfft, scientists. Do they ever get anything right? We don't know and frankly, we don't trust them enough to ask. What we do know is that history is littered with their whopping boners (that's an archaic term for blunder, so get your minds out of the gutter). That's right, these know-it-alls have been telling us what's what for time immemorial, incl…

We like to think we're on the pulse of what's new and fresh here at Hyper Theticals. And we bring that sexy innovation to you, the listener! Well there's this hot new thing called Climate Change, maybe you've heard of it. Now call us crazy, but we think maybe, just maybe, it might be bad. So: how fix? It'll come as no surprise to you, dear listener…

What old products or recipes can we re-brand to make them attractive for a modern audience? This week, we take a stroll through the orchard of history, and pluck up some weird old fruit in hopes that contemporary appetites are ready for a little exotic flavour. And some of it really is quite plucked up, believe me. Put aside your squeamishness howe…

What single invention, if edited out of the timeline of our history, would have the most interesting effect on our modern world? I know I know, but forget about the obvious ones - we won't be talking about essentials like fidget spinners and pet rocks. They say necessity is the mother of invention, but what we've learned is that you don't actually …

Are alien invaders best scared away by angry moon faces or giant space mirrors? Friends, we'd better figure it out before they run out of commonplace Earth pathogens and substances to be fatally vulnerable to. In the meantime, best to keep all your food in airtight containers and, when in doubt, hide behind the sofa and pretend not to be home. More…

There's almost nothing you can't do on your phone these days. Each app is a handheld miracle! Receive troubling news alerts for things you didn't know you should care about? Absolutely. Obsessively stalk your ex, developing encyclopedic knowledge of all their new friends and interests? Check. Convert legitimately valuable currency into barrels of b…

Ah, television. Like a sprawling oak, its foliage almost blocking out the sky. Even the single branch of "reality TV" is so long-established as to be massive, really a tree in its own right. Surely there can be no further room for growth? Well, we'll see. We're pretty sure we can find a bit more low-hanging fruit. Or acorns, or whatever. Consider s…

Do giant space rocks mean us harm, or just want to be friends? Perhaps they're only dangerous to reptiles of unusual size. Find out on this episode, and more importantly discover the many ways in which those ancient lizards, while large and awesome, proved themselves terribly under-prepared. Then, dare to dream - but in a limited fashion. If we sta…

There is a pronounced tendency for evolution to try to make crabs. That's not a joke, there's literally a scientific term for it: carcinisation. If that doesn't tickle your pincers, then I don't know what will. The conundrum that bedevils us this week features good ol' humanity though - what if we'd taken the aquatic turn on the genetic highway, in…

Season 2, ladies and gentlemen! We've returned from our long hiatus with renewed vigour, and we're not about to put up with any lazy, lethargic theticals around here. It's time to hype up or go home! This episode, Andy and Adriano consider what artefacts of our society will eventually confuse the heck out of future historians and archaeologists. We…

We kick things off with another rousing round of Hyper-fake-icals (better segment name still pending). It turns out a 'spendthrift' spends wastefully and to 'suppurate' means to discharge pus - who said learning can't be fun? Not nearly as fun as generating convincing falsehoods, but that goes without saying. Once the salmon are done singing some p…

This week we enlist animals to deliver exfoliating treatments, discover that beauty is in the belly of the leech, and draw faces on your teeth to anger shrimp. Having invented what might possibly be the exact opposite of beekeeping, we relax by trying to figure out which game show ideas could possibly be more unreal than some of the stuff that's al…

Brought to you from the HT vault, recorded in a simpler time. Andy and Adriano explore what might happen if nobody could stay indoors at all. We struggle to conduct meetings in fields, invent zorbing theatre, and funnel Londoners down a lubricated tube. Andy makes what may well be the car pun of the century. Having disintegrated the plane for your …

As an entrée, Adriano and Andy oxymoronically and unequivocally determine the next big hipster trend. Once your appetite is duly whetted, or whatever, buckle in for the main course. Expect dizzying heights, crushing lows, and a whole heap o' nausea as we explore that fascinating fusion of feast and frolic: fairground rides designed to provide nouri…

Adriano and Andy lose some their most basic abilities, topple babies and catch tiny buses, and fail to jettison any useless body parts. Also: rationing your emotions, there's an app for that. Music by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Hosted on Acast. See …

Andy & Adriano disabuse themselves of manifold childhood myths, plumb the murky depths of gainful adolescent employment and pay it forward by educating the next generation about blood sacrifice. Music by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 "Cuban Sandwich" & "March of the Spoons" http://creativecommon…

Andy and Adriano fail to cultivate bananas in a robotic future, crown cartoon monarchs, and take a village to train the worst possible leader. Join them as they feast on fascinating, fresh and occasionally fake new words, and finally take their revenge on a cruel world. Music used from Kevin Macleod at Incompetech.com, used under Creative Commons l…

Andy and Adriano plot to tattoo people full of plants and consensually conjoin sets of neo-twins. Meanwhile most if not all things turn green, and we realise that really the only way to go is catapults. Music by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Ho…

In this distinctly un-topical episode of the Hypertheticals podcast, Adriano and Andy mine childhood fiction for presidential candidates to usurp the current crop, inadvertently discover the secret to a crime-based utopia, discuss sequels and prequels that should remain firmly on the cutting room floor, and embark on an unneccesary dissection of Ho…

This time on the Hypertheticals podcast, Adriano and Andy discuss the pros and cons of gravity, discover trendy new ways to tell the future, and find out which famous scientist would come out on top in a rumble arena. Music used: Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/l…

In which Adriano and Andy discuss the ramifications of an entirely invisible population, the problems with Harry Potter, and propose some... alternative superheroes. Music used: "Chillin Hard", "Cuban Sandwich" & "Hidden Past" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/lice…

In their debut episode, Adriano and Andy discuss the silliness of similes, alien attitudes towards Brexit, bionically augmented sports, and their future careers as famous and extremely pretentious artists. Music used: "Chillin Hard", "Myst on the Moor", "Cuban Sandwich" & "Hidden Past" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons…