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Welcome to the podcast on Recovery from Coercive Control, a podcast that tries to unpack how coercive control impacts mental health, what psychology can teach us about recovery, and how to promote healing to build a hopeful future. Your host Dr Saira Khan is a psychologist and a human rights advocate based in London. As well as specialising in mental health and recovery from trauma, Saira has a lived experience of coercive control, so she knows how important and misunderstood this topic is.
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Spilling Chai

Anushay Hossain

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Welcome to “Spilling Chai” with Anushay & Friends. You may know Anushay Hossain as the Bangladeshi-American cable news commentator who debates toxic masculinity with Tucker Carlson on Fox News or maybe you’ve read her articles on CNN about toxic white supremacy. While Anushay may be a pro at giving her opinion and analysis on the headlines, something you don’t get to hear her do is ask the questions and talk about something other than the news. This podcast, “Spilling Chai” is about conversa ...
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How can you unlearn silence when women, especially women of color, have been told to not use our voice for centuries, by our cultures and families? Women still face grave risks to their personal and professional lives when they do choose to stand up for themselves. Speaker, writer, and facilitator, Elaine Lin Herring spills the tea with Anushay on …
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Can you be a woman of color and be a Republican? Are you really from the U.S. if you're brown? There was a time when answers to both those questions not only were "yes" but it still should be. And maybe it still can be. Political strategist and analyst, Rina Shah spills the tea with Anushay on making your American dream as a brown girl.…
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When we think of stand-up comedians, we don’t really think about mindful masculinity and raising strong daughters. The #MeToo movement wreaked havoc on the stand-up comedy world but honestly, the deep-rooted misogyny was already well- documented. But our guest today shatters stereotypes not only of the stand-up guy but also of the clueless, privile…
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Please note this practice should only be done if you have practiced mindfulness for some time. Saira has created these mindfulness practices for you to try. You're best starting with the shorter ones. And just bring them in a few times a week. It can be hard breaking the patterns of our lives to begin spending time doing these exercises, but it is …
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Saira has created these mindfulness practices for you to try. You're best starting with the shorter ones. And just bring them in a few times a week. It can be hard breaking the patterns of our lives to begin spending time doing these exercises, but it is worth the trouble. Your mind is going to wander during these practices. Don't worry, it's what …
  continue reading
 
Saira has created these mindfulness practices for you to try. You're best starting with the shorter ones. And just bring them in a few times a week. It can be hard breaking the patterns of our lives to begin spending time doing these exercises, but it is worth the trouble. Your mind is going to wander during these practices. Don't worry, it's what …
  continue reading
 
Saira has created these mindfulness practices for you to try. You're best starting with the shorter ones. And just bring them in a few times a week. It can be hard breaking the patterns of our lives to begin spending time doing these exercises, but it is worth the trouble. Your mind is going to wander during these practices. Don't worry, it's what …
  continue reading
 
Saira has created these mindfulness practices for you to try. You're best starting with the shorter ones. And just bring them in a few times a week. It can be hard breaking the patterns of our lives to begin spending time doing these exercises, but it is worth the trouble. Your mind is going to wander during these practices. Don't worry, it's what …
  continue reading
 
Saira has created these mindfulness practices for you to try. You're best starting with the shorter ones. And just bring them in a few times a week. It can be hard breaking the patterns of our lives to begin spending time doing these exercises, but it is worth the trouble. Your mind is going to wander during these practices. Don't worry, it's what …
  continue reading
 
After a crisis everything can feel like a big ball of distress. Everything feels as though it is spilling out and it can be hard to make sense of what is happening internally. To help with this Saira uses mindfulness. In this episode she explains what mindfulness is and why it's so helpful in recovery from a psychological perspective. Of course as …
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Much of the research around survivors of coercive control is grim and dark according to Saira. So in this episode she is sharing her thoughts around post-traumatic growth. Of course survivors, including Saira herself, have been through grim and dark times but they also have a real strength. Having said that it's important to note that post-traumati…
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For people on the outside of abusive relationships it can be very confusing to see survivors return to the person who has harmed them. And it's often confusing for the survivor too, this desire or urge to go back to the person who has hurt them. In this episode Saira examines why this might happen. Harlow YouTube Video - This is the monkey experime…
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Recovery from coercive control is possible. In this episode Saira explores how she works with survivors and the stages of recovery. Of course every survivor has their own story and it's not fair to generalise across everybody's experience but there are similarities in how people do recover. Saira's work with survivors is based on Judith Herman and …
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The first step in recovery is understanding what has happened to you. The next is making sense of what has happened to you, before you accepting that this has actually happened. And you can't start that first step until you know what coercive control actually is. In this episode Saira explores what coercive control is so you can recognise it happen…
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Saira Khan is a psychologist and a human rights advocate. Her area of interest is in mental health and recovery from trauma. She's also has lived experience of coercive control. In this episode Saira introduces herself and explains why she has created this podcast series. We hope this podcast has been helpful in your journey to understanding what h…
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The kitchen is normally thought of a space confined to women or rather where women have been confined. Anushay speaks with food writer, baker, and passionate eater, Marissa Rothkopf Bates about her work and her podcast, "The Secret Life of Cookies" where she flips the script on how we think of the spaces women occupy. And of course, the love that g…
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How do you learn to not only live with a chronic illness but thrive with it? That's the mission of talk show host, beauty and lifestyle expert, chronic illness advocate, and founder of Chronicon, Nitika Chopra. Whether you're battling cancer or going through a divorce, Chopra spills the tea with Anushay on not only living your best life but how to …
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What role to white women play in upholding white supremacy and racist systems? A pretty big one! Even though we tend to leave them out, historically (most) white women always stood by white men when it comes to social orders that place whiteness as superior to well, everything else. To this day, majority of college women in America vote for their r…
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One of the key themes in Anushay's book is the power of women telling their stories. During her research, Anushay became obsessed with the stories women don't tell and what we keep to ourselves. One of the most powerful stories she came across in her work is that of Tomeka Isaac who started the nonprofit organization, Jace's Journey after the loss …
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One of the biggest messages in Anushay's book, The Pain Gap is that maternal health is that America's maternal health crisis is solvable. We already have the tools and expertise to ensure no woman dies giving life. Yet, America's maternal mortality numbers, especially for Black women and women of color, are not only the highest amongst rich nations…
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Anushay describes herself as being “obsessed” with motherhood in America, largely because of its constant cultural contradictions. The image of motherhood in America is so white, yet its Black & Brown women who are more likely to die giving birth in the US. We claim to worship mothers but remain the only industrialized nation without paid maternity…
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Anushay has been a long time fan of American lawyer, politician, civil servant, founder of Girls Who Code, the Marshall Plan for Moms, five-time author, Reshma Saujani. Saujani is a warrior for women’s rights, using her platform to encourage us to raise brave not perfect girls and demand we pay moms in the workforce. Saujani joins Anushay to talk a…
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When Anushay began researching her book, it didn’t take long for her to discover gaps in addition to the pain gap in women’s health. While our previous episode analyzed the credibility gap, this episode we ideal with Dr. Alyson McGregor and her work exposing the serious lack of research in women health aka the knowledge gap.…
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Women don’t just face a pain gap when it comes to their health but we also have to deal with a “credibility gap.” In Anushay’s research, she finds that women are not believed about their bodies period— whether we’re in pain or if we’ve been assaulted or anything else. We are not believed. In this episode, Anushay speaks with author, Jaclyn Friedman…
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We often hear the statistic that women of color are more likely to die giving birth in America. But how many of us know that Black women are 243% more likely to die than their white counterparts? In this episode, Anushay speaks witness Dr. Kanika Harris about birth trauma, Black maternal mortality, and the truth about America’s maternal health cris…
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One of the most important things to remember about maternal mortality is that it’s a crisis that’s solvable. We already have the tools and expertise to save women’s lives. So why do so many women, especially Black women, die giving birth in the world’s richest democracy? Kimberly Seals Allers, author and founder of the Irth App, speaks to host, Anu…
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How can you talk about just one topic with multi-hyphenate Hitha Palepu? You can't! That's the first thing our host Anushay Hossain learned when she sat down to speak with author, entrepreneur, investor, writer, speaker, and CEO of Rhoshan Pharmaceuticals, Hitha Palepu. In this episode, the two women talk about pandemic motherhood, women and alcoho…
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How does US foreign policy impact women's reproductive health and rights around the world? How does America import its domestic abortion politics by creating foreign policies that deny women access to safe abortion and a full-range of reproductive healthcare? Those are the questions Anushay asks this week's guests who have taken the fight for safe …
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Five of the 10 most common medical interventions performed in the US are related to childbirth, and cesarean sections are the most widely performed surgery in the US. The cesarean section delivery rate has increased 500 (!!!) percent since 1970, and today more women die from pregnancy-related complications in America than any other rich country in …
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What does justice look like for women of color in America? That is the key question for our episode this week as host, Anushay Hossain, speaks with CNN’s chief legal analyst and author, Laura Coates about her new book, and pursuing birth and racial justice as a Black woman in the world’s richest democracy.…
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Did you know that more women die giving birth in America than in any other rich country? The number of women who die giving birth in America each year has nearly doubled in the last two decades, making the United States the only developed country with a consistently rising maternal mortality rate. How can we make giving birth in America safer? That…
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Hello my fabulous, dear Spilling Chai listeners! How is everyone? Welcome to the final episode of Season 3, coming to you from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain. When I was thinking about who we should have as the last guest for our season finale, only one person came to my mind: Bilal Qureshi, who was not only our very first guest on …
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Hello my Spilling Chai listeners! How is everyone? Welcome to episode 11 of season 3 of the show, coming to you from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain! Right before I graduated from college at UVA in 2002, a favorite professor of mine told me something I think of often: “In the real world, you’ll be shocked at how uninformed people rea…
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Hello my fabulous chai drinkers! How are you? Welcome to episode 10 of season three of the show coming to you as always from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain. When we think of stand-up comedians, we don’t really think about mindful masculinity and raising strong daughters. The #MeToo movement wreaked havoc on the stand-up comedy world…
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Hello my fabulous chai drinkers! How is everyone doing? Welcome to episode 9 of season three of the show, coming to you from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain. When you hear the words “Iran nuclear deal” what are the images that come up in your mind? I think of men-- mainly American and Iranian diplomats sitting across one another in t…
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Hello my fabulous chai drinkers! How are you? Welcome to episode 8 of season 3 of the show coming to you from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain! One of my favorite things about living in DC as a University of Virginia (UVA) alum is having so many friends you went to college with so close by. And when you find yourselves working on the …
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Hello my fabulous chai drinkers! How are you? Welcome to episode seven of season three of the show, coming to you from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain! We hear so much talk about diversity in the media but every now and then there is a journalist who becomes iconic just by doing their job. And when that person is a person of color? W…
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Hello my chai drinkers! How are you? Welcome to episode 6 of season 3 of the show, coming to you from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain! When you think about American mainstream media, the image that naturally comes to mind is that of a white, middle-aged man or woman, and with good reason. Whiteness has been synonymous with journalism…
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Hello my fabulous chai drinkers! How is everybody doing? Welcome to season 3, episode 5 of the show, coming to you from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain. It’s such a weird time to be alive and the duality is even more jarring if you’re South Asian-American: You watch the Indian subcontinent gasping for air while simultaneously watchin…
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Hello My Dear Chai Drinkers! How are you? Welcome to episode 4 of season 3 of the show, coming to you from Washington, DC. I’m your host, Anushay Hossain. When we think of spies, we think of iconic, leading Hollywood men (read: white men) like Sean Connery, Pierce Brosnan, or Daniel Craig. But in real life, patriotic immigrants, men of color also g…
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Hello my lovely chai drinkers! How are you? Welcome to episode 3 of season 3 of the show, coming to you from Washington, DC where the cherry blossoms and azaleas are just bursting all over the city. As COVID continues to ravage America and the world, domestic violence is also surging. According to the American Journal of Emergency Medicine, when th…
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